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Patricidal goon is named Sue, that's the real reason he's so pissed.
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Sep 29, 2016 02:49
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Racist arsonist: good try, but 7-11's never close.
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Oct 7, 2016 01:11
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No poo poo? Well, maybe it's true then.
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Oct 7, 2016 01:29
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OMGVBFLOL posted:lol that's what your disbelief hangs on I really wish we still had sarcasm tags
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Oct 7, 2016 01:51
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Charles Get-Out posted:It's obviously a creative writing exercise (like the shooting dogs story earlier), but he does mention that he broke in while the 7-11 was closed due to a hurricane, so at least it's consistent. Yeah, I missed that closed-for-hurricane part completely while reading the story and as a result, look like a complete idiot.  I'm kinda taking all of them at semi-face value until proven obviously fake though(like those old 50 Foot Ant stories), otherwise there's no real point in reading them.
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Oct 7, 2016 03:37
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<tries in vain to remember if I've ever used the free pen at a hotel*> *for writing
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Oct 8, 2016 19:24
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Nov 5, 2016 18:49
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I'm dating myself horribly here, but this whole thing sounds suspiciously like the Mcmartin Preschool Trial. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/McMartin_preschool_trial
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Nov 19, 2016 16:01
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loquacius posted:When I was really young, I would take a poo poo in my hands and put my poop into my Play-Doh dispensers. I'd shape my feces into various forms, like a crescent moon or a star. I wish I'd have thought of this.
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Dec 4, 2016 17:18
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Enola Gay-For-Pay posted:Could you get a fake eye that had an LED flashlight in it? That seems like it would be really cool and useful, might remove an eye so I can do that. I'm imagining Robot Chicken after reading this.
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Dec 10, 2016 03:53
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poo poo, the dream I always have is that I'm onstage, in a huge arena, giant screaming crowd, guitar hanging off my shoulder and the gig's about to start....and I realize I can't actually play the guitar. You'd think I'd be going 'aw gently caress, it's this drat dream again', but no, I panic. Every.Single.Time.
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Dec 12, 2016 14:03
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Glenn Quebec posted:I have dreams where I'm fighting and my punches are weak as gently caress and I can't protect myself or my family fuucck I used to have that dream weekly, it really sucks.
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Dec 14, 2016 01:56
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'Only opened the door for Dad in a dress'? Unless this dude is over 70 years old, he's full of poo poo/learned everything he knows about families from Leave it to Beaver. Realistically, it's just a terrible troll.
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Jan 1, 2017 16:37
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If junkie-whore wife lives in a community-property state, cokefiend hubby's gonna get screwed regardless. Best bet is probably just quit loving her until your coke addiction gets so bad you're both broke, then split up.
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Jan 29, 2017 15:54
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Depressed goon is already on anti-depressants. From one depressed goon to another, what helped me a lot was realizing that even though other people seem happy and have their poo poo together, very few of them actually do. Scratch a seemingly well-adjusted fellow worker or acquaintance and you'll invariable find somebody who's got terrible problems they're hiding as well - drug problems, dead/dying/insane family members, closeted sexuality, anxiety/panic disorders, financial trouble much worse than yourown, issues with ex's, kids, etc - everybody's all hosed up. Not that this insight helps you be less lonely, but you don't have to wallow in misery thinking that you're alone and miserable while everyone else isn't.
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Feb 27, 2017 15:52
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Leon Einstein posted:Do you honestly believe this? No, I just make random poo poo up and post it for no reason except to irritate you.
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Feb 28, 2017 02:01
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Solice Kirsk posted:And it's only side effects are weightloss and cool stories. Eh, it can cause brokedick too, but you won't even remotely give a poo poo.
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Feb 28, 2017 14:30
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Solice Kirsk posted:Hey addict goon, I've been through a lot of that same stuff and have been clean for over 10 years now. If you need/want to talk PM me. Thirding this.
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Mar 20, 2017 15:02
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grumplestiltzkin posted:Non anonymous confession: fush yu mang is a reasonably decent album that I occasionally enjoy listening to, unironically Yeah, I'm usually not one to set myself up for ridicule by defending Smashmouth of all bands, but their first album was decent enough. Except for that terrible Fonz song, that one was truly horrible.
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Mar 31, 2017 21:56
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Solice Kirsk posted:If I'm herring her correctly she needs to get off her high perch and mullet over a bit. She's just tired of herring the story over and over - cod you blame her? Edit: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=6l1GvDWtccI
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Apr 4, 2017 13:21
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I don't think declaring bankruptcy erases your student debt in most cases.
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Apr 7, 2017 12:48
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Smoking meth would probably do the job, actually.
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May 11, 2017 02:08
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fruit on the bottom posted:Could have used some on his own heart too, probably. Think he used a little too much of it, that's why his heart crapped out in the first place.
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May 13, 2017 21:46
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Solice Kirsk posted:Yeah, I try to explain Arizona/Southern racism to people up North and they just don't understand. They're used to "Uncle says something mildly racist at a cookout with the rest of the family" and not "group of little kids throwing out hard n's at another kid in a ball pit in front of their parents as everyone, including the staff, laughs." Arizona: "We put the South back in Southwest'
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May 14, 2017 14:48
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Even assuming genetics worked that way, doesn't the anonymous poster see a problem with 'every child will be above average in all traits'? Reminds me of Lake Wobegon.
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May 22, 2017 01:11
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Jeff Sichoe posted:I can't imagine how horrible it must be to see and deal with the absolute dregs of humanity and then be denigrated because you form biases based on the evidence presented to you every shift. Yeah, being a mod here must really suck.
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Jun 23, 2017 13:22
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Yeah, I was going to say the same thing; sometimes those screwy out-of-nowhere mass piss tests are just window dressing to easily get rid of a bunch of people the company already wants gone, and if you're on the 'keep list', your results go in the shitter. The coke thing is bad, though, Adderall probably would have been better in terms of job security.
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Jul 4, 2017 16:12
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Solice Kirsk posted:I still think the most disturbing serial killer thing is Edmund Kemper loving the mouth of his mother's severed head. That's just, like, too far man. Yup. What's even more disturbing is that I see Edmund Kemper pretty regularly, he's incarcerated at my place of employment. When I started there he walked with a cane, but he's mostly in a wheelchair now, he's getting on in years.
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Jul 15, 2017 22:39
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RFC2324 posted:Every dog is a good dog, and can be fixed with enough love and work. Not true, and it's irresponsible to say poo poo like that. (If you're just trolling or being ironic, then shame on me for falling for it) Nearly every animal's emotional health can be improved, proper training can improve most dog's behavior, and kindness/love goes a long way....but there are dogs who were treated so badly and have mental scars so damaging that 'fixing' the poor creature is not going to happen. One of my dogs was left with no food inside a foreclosed house back in 2011, she was discovered emaciated and near death by some neighbor kids. The rescue people, the veterinary clinic who did her medical care gratis and my gf + me have put an unbelievable amount of work toward helping her, but she's basically broken due to the trauma and can't be put right. Her separation anxiety is immense and understandable, luckily our household is a good fit for her and she's vastly improved, but I cannot blame dog owners who just don't have the time, ability, patience and situation to try to rehabilitate a distressed, damaged animal. The closet thing wasn't right, but at least the person realized it and did the right thing.
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Jul 28, 2017 01:56
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Every time I get one one those insufferable hipster waiters, I call him 'guyblow' under my breath after he leaves and nobody ever gets it. 
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Nov 24, 2017 23:26
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| # ¿ May 2, 2024 22:44 |
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It's like a nine-volt battery; sooner or later you have to put your tongue on it.
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Dec 18, 2017 01:03
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