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I'm delegating the OP to someone who actually has the talent to write a good OP. We'll circle back and interrupt him every hour on the hour until he gets it done
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Oct 27, 2016 15:06
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the soviet union will rise again. discuss
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Oct 27, 2016 15:08
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*pockets 99% of the money for 100 workers*
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Oct 27, 2016 15:09
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just ray posted:the soviet union will rise again. discuss lets take that discussion offline
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Oct 27, 2016 15:09
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Oct 27, 2016 15:08
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i like charts and graphs. they save me the trouble of looking at numbers goodwork, phil can we get 4 of those for the project charter?
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Oct 27, 2016 15:14
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Hi, I'm a project manager.
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Oct 27, 2016 15:15
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Slime Bro Helpdesk posted:Hi, I'm a project manager. let's touch base
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Oct 27, 2016 15:14
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im a project manager irl let me tell you its real hard work tbh *sends some emails, posts on reddit* for real this was my thursday
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Oct 27, 2016 15:14
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Zzulu posted:im a project manager irl how does it feel to watch your skillset slowly fade away? and can you respond ASAP? we're doing a scrum in 10 minutes in the hall
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Oct 27, 2016 15:18
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I liked when the recession hit and all the project managers learned they were just a luxury position.
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Oct 27, 2016 15:17
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Send me to this conference/training, need to get my hours in to maintain my certifications!
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Oct 27, 2016 15:20
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hth posted:how does it feel to watch your skillset slowly fade away? and can you respond ASAP? we're doing a scrum in 10 minutes in the hall im a leader of men a titan in teh workplace
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Oct 27, 2016 15:21
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Re: Fwd: Status Update Please advise
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Oct 27, 2016 15:21
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*Complains about superiors, other PMs to team all day* *accomplishes nothing* *3 hr lunch*
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Oct 27, 2016 15:20
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Finally gets PMP cert, entire coterie of coworkers and superiors chuckle about it behind back
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Oct 27, 2016 15:22
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It's the lovely job you have to do to earn a chance to compete for executive positions.
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Oct 27, 2016 15:25
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Hm. How can I best resource my dependables in order to maximally prioritize my thoughtwork throughput? *chugs a beer*
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Oct 27, 2016 15:27
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"I'll set up the meeting and send out invites" meeting starts, I get on the call, mute myself, and then gently caress around on the internet for an hour while people who actually have skills do work
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Oct 27, 2016 15:30
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Can you please log your time in Jira in increments of six minutes please so it meets up with my spreadsheet....
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Oct 27, 2016 15:30
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My job description is keeping programmers and all IT professionals as far away from the executives as humanly possible.
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Oct 27, 2016 15:33
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Slime Bro Helpdesk posted:My job description is keeping programmers and all IT professionals as far away from the executives as humanly possible. That sounds easy.
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Oct 27, 2016 15:45
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Mind-map: what does 'good' look like? *erect penis with word 'GO0D' written in sharpie slowly emerges from unzipped fly* it's a "nice to have"
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Oct 27, 2016 15:48
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Someone just mentioned "action points." Sounds like an RPG. I'm pretty sure I had AP in Fallout.
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Oct 27, 2016 16:42
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Thanks for your help everyone. You are now unemployed until we find another use for you. In the mean time, please live off your savings and try not to think about suicide.
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Oct 27, 2016 16:44
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null posted:Someone just mentioned "action points." Sounds like an RPG. I'm pretty sure I had AP in Fallout. if each day at work is one turn and i have ten AP to spend per day, let's see get coffee, 1 AP plug in laptop, 1 AP poop, 3 AP get lunch, 2 AP poop, 3 AP get seltzer, 1 AP go home
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Oct 27, 2016 16:49
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Okay I think this is good. I just have one note can you *describes undoing all the changes made to the document that I specifically requested after reading the first draft*
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Oct 27, 2016 16:51
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just ray posted:the soviet union will rise again. discuss Project managers, not pogrom managers
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Oct 27, 2016 16:51
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FedEx Mercury posted:It's the lovely job you have to do to earn a chance to compete for executive positions. pmo actually thinks its not the cushiest job on the planet
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Oct 27, 2016 17:06
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Jira sounds great Let's implement it asap
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Oct 27, 2016 17:06
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Mozi posted:Hm. How can I best resource my dependables in order to maximally prioritize my thoughtwork throughput? thats a good leverage of alcohol resources!
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Oct 27, 2016 17:09
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thanks for your hard work on this thread everyone, let me all buy you a shot of well whiskey at the bar *pockets 4 grand bonus*
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Oct 27, 2016 17:12
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*writes the niggerstomper58 post in the Story section of JIRA*
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Oct 27, 2016 17:13
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i believe the OP is an embittered IT professional with limited people skills, who has recently had a dust-up with a project manager and is looking to vent and for validation
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Oct 27, 2016 17:22
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Ok everyone, great thread, great ideas, I really like how people are just being so productive, but maybe now would be a good time to synergize
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Oct 27, 2016 17:26
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DOWN JACKET FETISH posted:i believe the OP is an embittered IT professional with limited people skills, who has recently had a dust-up with a project manager and is looking to vent and for validation scrum master spotted disclaimer: im basically a real-life wally from dilbert ScRoTo TuRbOtUrD fucked around with this message at 17:36 on Oct 27, 2016 |
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Oct 27, 2016 17:29
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Sponge Baathist posted:*pockets 99% of the money for 100 workers* Man, did I gently caress up my last salary negotiation
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Oct 27, 2016 17:31
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Metanaut posted:Man, did I gently caress up my last salary negotiation a pm under-budgeting you say?
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Oct 27, 2016 17:37
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Burt Sexual, Blackbelt PMP, ISSC, ITIL
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Oct 27, 2016 17:39
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| # ? May 31, 2024 22:47 |
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DOWN JACKET FETISH posted:i believe the OP is an embittered IT professional with limited people skills, who has recently had a dust-up with a project manager and is looking to vent and for validation I have never met a project manager worth a poo poo. And gently caress ITIL and gently caress you Burt
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Oct 27, 2016 17:39
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