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avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018

hello, friends

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avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018

an auspol man bought me an avatar and i tried to get it banned away to spite and infuriate him, but all i managed was a few lovely probations so i decided to change my identity. this is a new me, a new life, a new beginning for us all

avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018

avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018

Submarine Sandpaper posted:

I unfortunately missed the fart novels
the one i found this time was so amazing that it will make a reappearance someday, but only when the time is right

avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018

you'll know it when you see it

avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018

you whacked it really quickly ppj, you're doing a good job

avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018

:kimchi:

avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018


bibbit

avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018





tr33s

avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018

GhostofJohnMuir posted:

today i had to prune and organize about 500 oak saplings, then figure out how we're going to water them for the next month since work on the project is on hold
i spent months lovingly tending and potting out saplings in the on-site nursery of a local rehabilitation project, and then my manager planted them all out in rock-hard dirt in the middle of a field in the height of summer when it was 105°f all day every day and they promptly died

avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018

we don't have land rehabilitation clients in australia, someone paying to have their land rehabilitated is unheard of, you have to beg landowners for the privilege of touching their hosed-up degraded property and then do the work with 100% volunteer labour because the government doesn't fund it anymore

avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018

luckily that's an outdated system based on the australia that was. the australia that will be is a salty wind-blasted desert hellscape and i predict land rehabilitation will become an actual in-demand service in about ten years, which will be just in time for me to make a decent career off it in the unlikely event we're not all dead by then

avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018

today i wore yellow while interacting with the quail and for some reason it sent them into a panic, i had to change my clothes before they'd stop freaking out

avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018

Volkerball posted:

maybe they mistook you for the peanut m and m mascot
it's possible

avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018



happy berkeday

avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018

full communism now

avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018

GhostofJohnMuir posted:

but i'm tired...

avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018

someone tried to tell me once that dogs, like latvians, don't have human expressions and when i say vanya scowls i'm just projecting my anthropocentric views onto him. but vanya absolutely scowls, and he's scowling right now (it's raining)

avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018

i am exmarx's mother now

avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018

top of the morning to ye my writched son lit's have a chocolate fush and do a wee racism

avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018



it's them

avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018

avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018

my father's de facto wife is from a deeply rural part of new zealand and she is racist against absolutely everybody, including the jews (dad's one of the good ones but i'm not sure the same goes for me)

she once asked me if i had nignog heritage

avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018

nerzulland is a bleak place

avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018

i don't actually know

avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018

ok i actually do know, it was half an hour out of waipu

avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018

exmarx posted:

i've never been north of auckland but i know they love growing :420: up there. maybe she should just sm0ke some??

fun fact, aotearoa-newzealand has had 3 jewish prime ministers !
most of my time was spent north of auckland, dad's doomsday farm was near whangerei

it's a strange place

avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018

i used to think oocc was a gimmick but he's been doing it for too long and too earnestly to be anything other than an incredibly stupid man

avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018





avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018

what sort of damage would a shotgun blast at 10ft (or two shotgun blasts, to be specific) do to the human torso anyway? i need to know in decent detail for a book but i'm having trouble finding a specific description of what it would look like

avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018

the more damage the better, the character ideally comes back from the dead as a horrific golem with alien cacti spilling out of their empty chest cavity so that's the type of effect i'm looking for

avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018

Chelb posted:

for a book, uh huh
my actual assassination plans are much more arcane than a shotgun

avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018

first, i will remove my womb and consecrate it on a fiery altar

avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018

Party Plane Jones posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rhZf_x8Esms

Ballistic gel target but regardless it ain't gonna be pretty.
cool, thank you!

this is legitimately for a work of fiction please don't permaban me again

avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018

Volkerball posted:

:clint: well what a shotgun gonna do is give ya a good spread. real nice spread. but it sound like to me what yer lookin fer is a fifty calibur. that sumbitch'll do the job.
thank you creepy uncle volkerball, unfortunately it's got to be something that a well-connected sassy teen could conceivably find on the black market so i think i'll just go with a shotgun and settle for less gore

avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018

i don't really care about this detail all that much and would be satisfied just to say "he got shot, end of story" but gun nerds are the most insufferable people on the planet and if you put a gun in a book you have to get it exactly right or nerds piss all over themselves

avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018

Volkerball posted:

is it not set in america
why would it be set in america

avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018

i might just say "a gun" lol, gently caress it

avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018

cinci zoo sniper posted:

establish cattle control agency that would have to patrol rural areas in states and monitor cattle movement and breakouts and catch stray goats etc
realtalk they can't do this because it's impinging on the freedoms of the ranchers to have their cattle break out and wreak destruction on national parkland

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avshalemon
Jun 28, 2018

i have a curse where every time i put in a volunteer application for a place and ask to work with animals, they go "no you can't work with the animals but you know what you'd be really good with? CHILDREN"

it's called being female

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