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journey to the west (the basis of dragonball z, appropriately enough) is all about taoist sages who abuse their magical powers. many of them are animals who became supremely enlightened and decided to use their powers to become immortal shapeshifting demons who take advantage of travelers. monkey king is himself a supremely enlightened animal, but of a special kind: he is not a regular monkey but a unique cosmic being from the beginning of time. he uses his powers to nearly overthrow heaven, before Buddha imprisons and reforms him. pretty awesome poo poo, which in the end makes mostly for a lot of dirty jokes and an extended metaphor for humankind's relative inability to resist their passions.
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# ? Dec 17, 2016 16:37 |
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# ? May 13, 2024 08:14 |
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Moon Atari posted:These holy texts are said to be the literal word of god, so if we interpret that passage to suggest penis size insecurity on behalf of the author we must concede that God himself is insecure in regards to his junk. Whether it is small in comparison to donkey dick or simply small for a celestial being is unclear, however given Mary failed to notice it happening I assume the former. he wrote, while rolling his eyes to a display cabinet of carefully spaced Beast Dildos (tm) arranged by size, with shelves labelled 'good' dick to 'junk' dick. It struck him then that there was no way God could rival the foremost of his collection; the Dragon Ouroborous Dildo, which was so long and heavy it looped back on itself by the effect of gravity. As a concept it was perfection that could not be outdone. Although human genius and craft had made that one real, donkey rod was hanging around in Mary's unsophisticated day, so why did God not have an equal rod, or possibly have no rod at all? "I guess it's something you find out when you die" he smirked, as he clicked the submit button on that wicked deconstruction of 'G*d'.
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# ? Dec 17, 2016 16:40 |
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it is p. obvious that the donkey mary was riding was god, and he raped her. direct parallels to lots of other mythic cultures where gods take on animal form and rape virgins.
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# ? Dec 17, 2016 16:43 |
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nomadologique posted:it is p. obvious that the donkey mary was riding was god, and he raped her. Not in my bible it's not mate. You must be glancing at your libary of comparative mythology and sociology of rape texts to even have that idea.
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# ? Dec 17, 2016 16:52 |
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not my job to account for the ancient bowdlerization of a good old fashioned rape.
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# ? Dec 17, 2016 16:54 |
Haier posted:I mean take out the "God said so" part and it is absolutely insane (still insane with the "God said so"). Some lunatic in the desert suddenly decided to tell his friends that "God" spoke to him and now the only way they can keep a deal with God is by.... hmm.. let's take knives to our dicks! Prob like a weird desert bug got on a guys dicktip and wouldn't let go, so out of desperation they chopped it off. Or like, you ever get sand in your eye? Same, but dick. Chop the "eyelid" and prob solved. Not that hard to get to the preventative measures level.
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# ? Dec 17, 2016 17:09 |
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their wives and girlfriends were so sick of their disgusting desert dick cheese they finally said just cut it off or we're done for good actually it probably has more to do w ritual scarring/tattooing that appears in many cultures as a rite of passage (you also see this in the western world in, for instance, prisons and gangs); marking or changing the body is an irreversible way of indicating entrance and inclusion. nietzsche talks about this in genealogy of morals, from a philosophical/psychological standpoint; i'm sure there is also tons of more "scientific" research/writing on the subject, in anthropology and sociology.
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# ? Dec 17, 2016 17:29 |
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my favourite talmud thing is the part where they decided the amount of sex men were required to have because of the command to be fruitful and multiply and the based it on what kind of job you did since people doing backbreaking labour or travelling as merchants couldnt be expected to bone as often as people with easy jobs. Rabbis had the highest sex quota at like 3 times a week or something
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# ? Dec 17, 2016 17:29 |
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nomadologique posted:their wives and girlfriends were so sick of their disgusting desert dick cheese they finally said just cut it off or we're done for good The Xhosa in South Africa have circumcision as a rite of manhood. It's not at 8 days; I think it's around 16 (years). 😧 I'm pretty sure it developed independently of Judaism.
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# ? Dec 17, 2016 17:32 |
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also most of this poo poo was written during the babylonian diaspora and some of it as recent as like sixth century
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# ? Dec 17, 2016 17:32 |
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"we will have sex only once every seven years, which for many of you will be much less than before, but for me will be much much more."
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# ? Dec 17, 2016 17:35 |
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i looked it up and its actually you are required to have sex with your wife regularly so she doesnt get too horny and if you are a scholar you must gently caress your wife every friday night at the least
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# ? Dec 17, 2016 17:39 |
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nomadologique posted:apparently yogis had all sorts of cool magical powers, and practiced taoist sages. lots of overlap w rabbi powers. Siddhis are cool: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Siddhi quote:Eight primary siddhis The difference for siddhi power is that you just go sit your rear end down, or stand, or whatever, and concentrate/meditate super hard for a long time and then develop them, and/or someone will come give you one or a boon. None of this "chosen race" business. A lot of the stories where someone gets some power is due to being scorned or angry about something and wanting to get revenge. therattle posted:The Xhosa in South Africa have circumcision as a rite of manhood. It's not at 8 days; I think it's around 16 (years). 😧 I'm pretty sure it developed independently of Judaism. I'm wondering if any of the cultures like Egyptians and Babylonians that Jews were apparently enslaved by had a circumcision practice. Considering how much they picked up from other cultures and claimed as their own, I wonder if something that extreme might be part of it.
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# ? Dec 17, 2016 18:24 |
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Haier posted:I mean take out the "God said so" part and it is absolutely insane (still insane with the "God said so"). Some lunatic in the desert suddenly decided to tell his friends that "God" spoke to him and now the only way they can keep a deal with God is by.... hmm.. let's take knives to our dicks! There are tons of examples of weird, pointless ritual body modification all over the world. Piercings, tattoos, scarification, stretched ear lobes and lips, foot binding, the Kayan women in Myanmar with the neck rings, and so on. It's ritual, it's not supposed to have a practical, earthly motivation. Besides, we weren't there for the conversations between the priests/chiefs/elders/etc. that led up to the decision that [thing] is going to be a way for their people from now on; it probably made more sense in context. Male circumcision isn't all that rare or extreme, anyway. It was practiced by other Semitic groups, ancient Egyptians, the Phoenicians, and sub-Saharan Africans (where it's still practiced). And it doesn't really compare to carving a design into your skin and rubbing ash into the wound, breaking and re-breaking bones in a little girl's feet, or wearing heavy neck rings that push your collar bone into your rib cage.
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# ? Dec 17, 2016 18:28 |
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quote:dūraśravaṇa: Hearing things far away jesus also has this power in john. quote:43 ¶ The day following Jesus would go forth into Galilee, and findeth Philip, and saith unto him, Follow me. also lmao at "Can there any good thing come out of Nazareth?" i've heard that the book of job has the bible's "only" joke (God says to Job "what were you when i made the world?") but come on, this is obviously a quippable quip Jesus naming Simon "Rock" (a polite way of calling him dumb) is also funny as gently caress "What is your name?" "Simon." "Not anymore."
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# ? Dec 17, 2016 18:30 |
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Bobbie Wickham posted:There are tons of examples of weird, pointless ritual body modification all over the world. Piercings, tattoos, scarification, stretched ear lobes and lips, foot binding, the Kayan women in Myanmar with the neck rings, and so on. It's ritual, it's not supposed to have a practical, earthly motivation. i don't understand this attitude. obviously it has a practical and earthly motivation, otherwise people wouldn't do it. it just usually isn't what they tell you it is. "group cohesion through painful alteration" is a pretty succinct and likely explanation. which is not to say "practical and earthly motivation" is the end all be all of something, but it is a component. a more interesting proposition is that these practices arise without any practical or earthly motivation, and adopt that motivation later. the ones that are unable to adopt a motivation die out. in this way, social evolution operates on the same mechanism as genetic evolution: evolutionary changes arise "for no reason," and are preserved only if they manage to capture a practical function and "justify" themselves.
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# ? Dec 17, 2016 18:34 |
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Jeff Sichoe posted:and then right after that a little boy was stung on the very tip of his foreskin by a Cyprian and millions of years later little boys are still having pieces of their penus lopped off. stop being mad about your ugly dick
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# ? Dec 17, 2016 18:41 |
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nomadologique posted:i don't understand this attitude. obviously it has a practical and earthly motivation, otherwise people wouldn't do it. it just usually isn't what they tell you it is. "group cohesion through painful alteration" is a pretty succinct and likely explanation. The thing about genetic evolution is, many traits are preserved that don't serve a practical purpose. The only requirement is that it doesn't prevent an organism from successfully procreating. Animals are born with missing or extra parts all the time; in fact, polydactyly--having extra digits--is a dominant trait in cats. The spotted hyena is a species of small, timid males bullied by larger, aggressive pseudo-hermaphroditic females that use their clitorises as a combination penis/vagina. Evolution is not logical, linear, or economical. As long as something doesn't result in a hereditary dead-end, it will be carried along down the line. Edit: Hit Submit too soon. Anyway, that's how it goes with social evolution, too. As long as a practice isn't fatal and has enough appeal of some sort, it'll be practiced. Bobbie Wickham fucked around with this message at 19:16 on Dec 17, 2016 |
# ? Dec 17, 2016 19:13 |
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that's true, and a good point. i think the case of ritual body alteration is different, because of how widespread it is across human societies (if these are analagous to "species")* and how important it tends to be to societies that practice it... except in a case, like male circumcision in the modern western world, where it's become kind of vestigial. *if a genetic change appears again and again, in different lineages, arising multiple times independently, the case is strong that it is not a "neutral" change.
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# ? Dec 17, 2016 19:17 |
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tangentially, i wonder if there's much information about the % of changes that are neutral vs. effective. i've gotta imagine that most macroscopic changes kill organism viability; and only a few of them are either positive or neutral.
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# ? Dec 17, 2016 19:20 |
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nomadologique posted:*if a genetic change appears again and again, in different lineages, arising multiple times independently, the case is strong that it is not a "neutral" change. According to who? A single trait can be the result of many genetic variations. For example, red hair in humans is caused by a mutation in the MC1R gene, and there are something like 8 or 9 possibilities of what that mutation could be. It could be more than one mutation, as well. Different mutations acting upon the same regions of the chromosome will produce similar traits. Give yourself enough time and a sufficiently large population, and eventually the same non-fatal traits will emerge. It's an odds game.
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# ? Dec 17, 2016 19:32 |
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you may be right, i'm not sure i have a cogent enough argument; nevertheless, i think there is enough evidence to support the position that ritual body alteration does serve a function in human society. in fact i think it's probably pretty challenging to come up with a widespread social institution that doesn't have a function easy to identify.
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# ? Dec 17, 2016 20:08 |
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So how do you guys pronounce golem? Go with a long o, or with more like Gollum?
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# ? Dec 17, 2016 20:12 |
Golem, because they're go-to kinda magic
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# ? Dec 17, 2016 20:16 |
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nomadologique posted:you may be right, i'm not sure i have a cogent enough argument; nevertheless, i think there is enough evidence to support the position that ritual body alteration does serve a function in human society. I think we may be arguing past each other a little, because I also think group cohesion is a major motivation for rituals. What I meant by "no practical earthly reason" was, not a straightforward cause-and-effect in the material world. Praying for good weather isn't the same thing as creating a wide-spread irrigation system, but they're meant to achieve the same goal.
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# ? Dec 17, 2016 20:38 |
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violent sex idiot posted:also most of this poo poo was written during the babylonian diaspora and some of it as recent as like sixth century So how do they decided what put in and what isn't?
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# ? Dec 18, 2016 01:03 |
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Dicky mouse posted:So how do they decided what put in and what isn't? Im on wikipedia now I gotta read the stuff that didnt make the cut
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# ? Dec 18, 2016 01:09 |
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the torah is where the cut was made, torah is canon and talmud is eu/fanfic
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# ? Dec 18, 2016 01:50 |
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So which of the Rabbis is Goku and which one is Vegeta?
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# ? Dec 18, 2016 02:02 |
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# ? Dec 30, 2016 12:01 |
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Deep Thought posted:he wrote, while rolling his eyes to a display cabinet of carefully spaced Beast Dildos (tm) arranged by size, with shelves labelled 'good' dick to 'junk' dick. It struck him then that there was no way God could rival the foremost of his collection; the Dragon Ouroborous Dildo, which was so long and heavy it looped back on itself by the effect of gravity. As a concept it was perfection that could not be outdone. Although human genius and craft had made that one real, donkey rod was hanging around in Mary's unsophisticated day, so why did God not have an equal rod, or possibly have no rod at all? "I guess it's something you find out when you die" he smirked, as he clicked the submit button on that wicked deconstruction of 'G*d'. Oddly passionate reaction in defence of god's dick size, imo.
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# ? Dec 30, 2016 12:18 |
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why would god even have a dick whats he gonna do with it
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# ? Dec 30, 2016 12:26 |
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BIG PUFFY NIPS posted:why would god even have a dick whats he gonna do with it I imagine god gets to choose how big his dick is. Hes not gonna pick a little one
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# ? Dec 30, 2016 12:35 |
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God needed a dick for Asherah
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# ? Dec 30, 2016 15:14 |
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BIG PUFFY NIPS posted:why would god even have a dick whats he gonna do with it maybe you haven't read the Torah. God likes to gently caress the Jewish people on a regular basis
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# ? Dec 30, 2016 15:15 |
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Rutibex posted:maybe you haven't read the Torah. God likes to gently caress the Jewish people on a regular basis Lmao
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# ? Dec 30, 2016 15:18 |
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Rutibex posted:maybe you haven't read the Torah. God likes to gently caress the Jewish people on a regular basis Rubitex I know you from a few different threads. You're a terrible poster. I think you finially made a good post here.
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# ? Dec 30, 2016 15:40 |
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Isaac posted:Rubitex I know you from a few different threads. You're a terrible poster. I think you finially made a good post here. I'm an acquired taste
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# ? Dec 30, 2016 15:57 |
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yeah but the important question is whether or not God is circumsized. I would think not....I'm not, does this give my penis godly powers?
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# ? Dec 30, 2016 18:03 |
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# ? May 13, 2024 08:14 |
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DiHK posted:yeah but the important question is whether or not God is circumsized. I would think not....I'm not, does this give my penis godly powers? No, he made Adam in his image. Circumcision as a sign of the covenant wasn't until Noah.
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# ? Dec 30, 2016 20:06 |