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I have a grimoire and a cauldron and stuff but ever since I acquired a magic crystal ball from a wandering adventurer I pretty much spend all day spying on cute maidens in bathhouses don't kinkshame
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Dec 29, 2016 08:09
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| # ¿ May 1, 2024 17:37 |
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Commoners posted:I accidentally left the secret exit that leads back to the entrance of my dungeon so that I don't have to backtrack open, and adventurers entered my loot room and took everything. I didn't have all of my art pieces and magical equipment listed out or appraised for value, how should I go about contacting my dungeon owner's insurance to try to get at least some of the value back from what was stolen? Do you have the Wizard Plus plan or the standard Evil Overlord package? Because I believe Plus covers cursed objects. (Although I hope you extended the coverage to liabilities because, get this, if the adventurers suffer physical or mental harm from use of the objects (which they stole), the adventurers can come back and sue you for damages.) Fortunately you can remove the deductible from your taxable income if you're on the Plus plan, up to 2000 gold coins if you're in good standing with the Evil Magic-Users Society. The Evil Overlord plan might cover cursed weapons (not armor, accessories, art, etc.) but even then the deductible can't be written off. There might be a loophole there regarding the lethality of the objects in question which could merit their reclassification as weapons, but you'd have to consult EMUS or a lawyer. Edit: wait, are we talking curses or hexes here? Ugh hold on *conjures tomes labeled "Legal Glossary of Enchantments Vol 4" and "Arcane Insurance"* you might want to summon a chair
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Dec 30, 2016 09:11
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I know this isn't sa mart but does anyone have an extra interdimensional portal they'd be willing to sell me? Or we could trade, I happen to have enough ground-up rat skeletons for a poo poo ton of invisibility cream
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Dec 30, 2016 18:21
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Speleothing posted:YES! We don't use ours and want to convert the space into a reanimation lab. Perfect, pm me e: to clarify, that's "psychic message," I don't have platinum
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Jan 1, 2017 05:30
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trying to conjure a fun new character for my undead army to boost morale. Mr. Bones he's called, he's supposed to wear a top hat and use a cane and speak in a 1920s New York accent and do musical numbers on cue. But I'm having a hell of a time getting the drat hat to stay on his head, it just keeps slipping off. I've tried a freeze spell, eldertree sap, an attachment rune, and gorilla glue, but nothing works. I'm almost positive it's cursed but for the life of me I can't remember who or where I bought it from. I'll probably just take a trip to the underworld and get a cheap plastic hat from wailmart or something
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Jan 2, 2017 18:58
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CAPT. Rainbowbeard posted:Mr. Bones should be able to doff his chapeau if he encounters a lady adventurer. Before the dismemberment or whatever it is you want him to do to intruders. What, are you nuts? This guy isn't going out to battle. Worst case scenario I'll have him play the lovable chaotic neutral and charm heroes to lead them straight to one of the myriad of traps I have set up. But during off hours the boys need something to entertain them besides undead fight club and skeleton porn. And just tell me how he's going to hold his hat on his head, and operate a gramophone, and do slapstick comedy, AND constantly dance the Charleston all at once??? He can only do three of those things simultaneously, I'll tell you right now. kalel fucked around with this message at 20:39 on Jan 2, 2017 |
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Jan 2, 2017 20:37
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naem posted:paying skeletons with meat is so great becasie what are adventurers made of? well, okay, but, hold on there, then you've kind of got a sort of ponzie scheme going on, because if one skelly eats an adventurer, okay, now you've got two skelleys.... who eventually each need two heros worth of meat... then you've got four skelleys, etc Hopefully the eldritch IRS doesn't find you and audit your rear end to oblivion (literally)
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Jan 3, 2017 05:40
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I was doing evil yoga and accidentally ripped my last cursed darkflame yoga pants (only +8, because I ran out of aetherium). there goes my fire resistance, now even a level 5 barbarian could take a torch off the wall of my dungeon and burn my face off. time to go back to aberzombie and eldritch and order 5 more, plus I have to infuse them with the black lava dragon blood myself, ugggghhhh incidentally, does anyone know where I can buy yoga mats pre-coated with the ground corpses of magical creatures? I personally coated mine with glowfairy wing dust which gave it a nice lavender scent and increased health regen, but when I ripped my pants I also shat myself with anger and contaminated the spell
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Jan 5, 2017 08:00
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I saved a cat from a tree once I needed its eyes for a nightvision potion and its claws for a summoning ritual, but still
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Jan 7, 2017 18:34
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Any love for prisms of power? I'm a tetrahedron man myself
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May 22, 2017 22:30
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| # ¿ May 1, 2024 17:37 |
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The most evil wizard of them all https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Grand_Wizard
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Sep 21, 2017 14:58
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