NCAA Offseason N/V: Home of the Bad Boy Mowers Gasparilla Bowl (awaiting Shark Bowl)

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > The Football Funhouse > NCAA Offseason N/V: Home of the Bad Boy Mowers Gasparilla Bowl (awaiting Shark Bowl)

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Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

So yea, the ACC is definitely the best conference.

# ¿ Jan 10, 2017 07:03

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# ¿ Apr 28, 2024 19:50

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

Losing Scarbrough ended Bama. They couldn't control the clock as well and the D got worn down for it. I mean, if they had gotten a first down at any of the three 3 and out's they had in the 4th then Clemson doesn't have those 2 minutes at the end.

Crotch Bat fucked around with this message at 11:29 on Jan 10, 2017

# ¿ Jan 10, 2017 11:24

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

The Little Kielbasa posted:

Has anyone seen a good list of who has a (joking) claim to the national championship based on "we beat the team that beat the team that beat Clemson" chains yet? It should be huge this year, since Pitt lost to a lot of mediocre teams that lost a lot of games. Maybe we even have a Div2 claimant.

I did see one on Twitter last night, JMU can claim both the FCS and FBS titles.

e: figured it out, it's Clemson < Pitt < Northwestern < Illinois State(loving really, NW?) < NDSU < JMU

Crotch Bat fucked around with this message at 20:24 on Jan 10, 2017

# ¿ Jan 10, 2017 20:20

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

The ACC's been getting better for a few years now, it's just everyone else kinda refusing to buy in to the idea even though the evidence is clear as day, especially with how this year went. That bowl record alone is ridiculous at 9-3 but in general almost every program is in an improved state from 5 years ago and has become the most difficult out of all conferences in OOC games.

# ¿ Jan 11, 2017 00:23

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

The Glumslinger posted:

I don't have a particular issue with Washington being ranked above USC, they were more consistently good during the season. I think USC was better than Washington, but you can't just pretend like their losses to Stanford and Utah don't count

If end of year polls are meant as a reflection on the whole season, absolutely not, Washington had a great year. If the polls are meant as a reflection on how the season ended then USC should be #3.

Speaking of, besides that Ju Ju Smith-Schuster kid did USC lose anyone else to the draft? If not I think they'll make a good run at the CFP next year.

# ¿ Jan 11, 2017 00:31

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

Sash! posted:

poo poo, they could have made a good run at it this year.

I look forward to everyone coming to love, then hate, their QB. He looks like a bit of a douche, which you expect of your QBs, but I think he looks like a thumb.

Yea, I said as much after their game. He's going to be a smart kid and do everything properly which means people will hate him eventually (as opposed to hating him immediately for being a dickhead) and then he's going to leave in 2 years as the #1 pick and people are going to be dying for their team to draft him. It feels weird to have that sort of intuition that some kid is "can't fail" because he's like 18 and it's so easy to go off the rails in sports but man, it sure seems strong with him.

# ¿ Jan 11, 2017 01:17

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

Harbaugh seems like someone you could gaslight really easy and probably really gently caress up his life because it seems like it would be intensely regimented and ordered.

What I'm saying is how can we gaslight Harbaugh?

# ¿ Jan 12, 2017 05:28

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

We use this forum to mock virtually every well known coach in the sport for the dumb stuff they say or do.

A mod once spent real life time and money dedicating a website to making fun of a coach for having epilepsy and we thought it was the funniest loving thing ever.

MourningView posted:

It's usually not reg doing that

You sure? I think it is him. Pretty sure he's yelled at me like 3 times thinking when I post about Harbaugh it's because VT lost that Sugar Bowl and why am I even bothering posting about Michigan because VT isn't a rival.

Crotch Bat fucked around with this message at 16:30 on Jan 12, 2017

# ¿ Jan 12, 2017 16:27

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

Henchman of Santa posted:

That's Marquis de Pyro. Reg is One of the Good Ones.

You're absolutely right, he is a good one. My mistake. Sometimes I get Michigan Men on the brain and boy I can't stop.

# ¿ Jan 12, 2017 17:01

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

Jim Harbaugh's greatest regret in life is not having enough children at an early age so he could be solely responsible for the starting 11 of a defense at a place he coached.

# ¿ Jan 14, 2017 17:22

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

By the way that's also the only acceptable use of polygamy in the modern world. Roll Tide.

# ¿ Jan 14, 2017 17:24

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

Don't read the reply tweets on that because 80% of them think it's just a case of a bunch of weak-willed, soft kids, as if once someone is in the "proper" shape it becomes impossible to hurt them via training and conditioning hard. I bet if Oregon went 12-1 last year they'd be crawling up the S&C staff's rear end over this, though.

Never underestimate the power of people who think rhabdo is something you get inoculated for as an infant.

# ¿ Jan 17, 2017 02:36

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

kayakyakr posted:

Let's be fair, the mistake was taking a team that hadn't been working out and throwing them into an intense workout rather than the workout itself being too intense.

Basically, on its own, what they did was fine, but being the first thing they did when getting back from break was a poor idea.

No, whatever they did was too much. Out of shape people don't really get rhabdo because they listen to their bodies and stop when it's had too much. Rhabdo is what happens when in-shape people ignore their bodies (or are forced to ignore) and continue to exercise well past its breaking point. There's a reason rhabdo is a Crossfit thing and not something you see at your local YMCA.

Oregon being lovely right now doesn't mean their players are FCS cast-offs who would struggle with a high school workout regimen. The kids are in shape, they were simply overworked. This is not a hell week thing where kids are just puking a lot and are more tired because of the system shock, this was just too much conditioning.

e: and it's not to say it's not somewhat understandable as running kids into the ground in the winter as a new HC is just what's done but this was clearly too intense. It's not something they'll adjust to, it's something that will need to be dialed back.

Crotch Bat fucked around with this message at 05:12 on Jan 17, 2017

# ¿ Jan 17, 2017 04:57

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

swickles posted:

A single guy getting rhabdo is bad luck, even two could be supremely bad luck, but multiple players is a sign of pushing people far beyond their limits. Its super lovely for everyone involved, and I still hold the idea of not attributing to malice what can be attributed to ignorance, but man, someone has got to go for this.

Agreed. This was very likely just some stupid S&C coaching but at the same time you wonder where does the responsibility lie in their job if they're not only allowing kids to become dangerously ill under their care but being directly responsible for it. At some point ignorance should cease to be an excuse for a poorly done job.

# ¿ Jan 17, 2017 07:08

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

They suspended the Oregon S&C coach a month without pay. Seems like a fair punishment to me.

# ¿ Jan 18, 2017 08:06

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

I'm sorry, can anyone give a more elaborate tl;dr? What in the wide world of sports is going on?

# ¿ Jan 20, 2017 01:21

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

I'm just glad he changed the thread title before he quit. It's so good you could almost just make every thread from now on like "A&M is rear end, my dude: Week 1 Edition".

# ¿ Jan 20, 2017 02:55

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

pillsburysoldier posted:

I don't know what that means

Lowtax stepped down from running the forums in 2008 if I remember right. I don't know for sure but I'd wager a guess that his recent return has probably caused some sort of internalized disagreement amongst mods and admins that caused a lot of people to say gently caress it and step away. Not really sure how right or wrong that is since because GBS is gone I haven't the slightest idea where to look to find a megathread talking about this stuff. That may be totally off base but it seems like mods had to pick sides so I'd guess his return wasn't entirely with open arms.

# ¿ Jan 20, 2017 04:46

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

The most logical backup plan, since nobody should be insane enough to pay money to host a board for our shitposting, is to just make our own subreddit. You'd just need someone trustworthy enough as lead mod because whoever owns that poo poo essentially owns it as long as they're active and reddit admins almost never take away or turn over lead mod powers. Make it invite only (or don't) and we'd just migrate there.

I think we'll be here chatting up CFB for some time so I don't consider it a real concern right now.

# ¿ Jan 20, 2017 16:38

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

I will only accept Big 10 mods from teams with a middling to moderately good profile on average so uh, Nebraska and that one guy from Northwestern.

# ¿ Jan 22, 2017 15:31

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

Virginia gets all 4 seasons but spring and fall are pretty amazing. It's a great median state for weather, you get a bit of everything but never to the extreme. When it's hot its 90 not 105, when it's cold it's 20 not 0, when it snows you get 4-8 inches not 12-18 (a massively underappreciated fact when you go from being a kid to owning your own home).

# ¿ Jan 23, 2017 03:05

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

KKKLIP ART posted:

Kiffin putting the dagger in Bama's side for his new boss is awesome.

It's also the basis for his return to HC being at FAU and when this inevitably ends his prospects will probably be as an OC for life. Being a dickhead as a HC is fine if you're good at it. If you're an rear end and you lose games you're eventually not going to get hired anywhere worth a poo poo (see: Bo Pelini)

# ¿ Jan 23, 2017 20:19

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

Henchman of Santa posted:

Yeah I'm not exactly bothered by the idea of Mark Dantonio having to develop unheralded recruits

Hi, VT fan here. That works until it doesn't and when it doesn't you are fuuuuuuucked.

# ¿ Jan 24, 2017 18:05

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

Henchman of Santa posted:

Your worst seasons under Beamer are better than the rock bottom we just hit and we're not in the middle of nowhere like Blacksburg so eh. I don't expect to go back to the playoff any time soon but I have no problem with being a consistently competitive team.

Our worst seasons under Beamer were held afloat by being in a terrible division (2nd or 3rd worst team in the then-worst division in all of P5), having a terrible cross-divisional foe (BC), and depending on a somehow even worse in-state rival to become bowl eligible 3 of the last 4 years. They also played Clemson and FSU a total of one time each in those 4 years.

Ready for the majority of VT wins from 2012-2015?

4 x UVA
3 x GT
2 x UNC, Duke, BC
1 x Pitt, Miami, NCSU

VT is a sub-.500 team 3 of the last 4 years under Beamer if VT was in any other P5 conference with a record just like MSU.

Like I said, coaching up kids works until it doesn't. When you fall behind it's so difficult to climb back without completely overhauling. I don't know if MSU is really struggling to recruit even up to their normal levels but I'd worry if they did.

# ¿ Jan 24, 2017 18:56

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

Henchman of Santa posted:

It's more like they've returned to their normal levels

If VT still had Beamer there was a 100% chance they'd have been a 4-5 win team this year at best. The Coastal is no longer the joke it had been in recent years. Miami, UNC, Pitt, GT all finished 8-4 or 9-3.

# ¿ Jan 24, 2017 19:01

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

In "you can't make this poo poo up" news, Rudy is now a Mormon. :psyduck:

Here he is in full super special baptismal regalia.

Crotch Bat fucked around with this message at 19:13 on Jan 24, 2017

# ¿ Jan 24, 2017 19:10

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

It's flexbone. It's also way cooler to call it that than calling it the triple option.

# ¿ Jan 25, 2017 07:05

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

And Musberger has called his last college football game. He finishes with basketball on the 31st with a UK/UGA game.

# ¿ Jan 25, 2017 17:01

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

You can get insurance for just about anything if you're willing to pay for it. For a one-time thing it worked out for Clemson but good luck getting those premiums ever again.

# ¿ Jan 27, 2017 20:23

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

kayakyakr posted:

#BaylorLit

http://www.dallasnews.com/news/bayl...players-4-years

# ¿ Jan 27, 2017 23:21

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

Some USC fan took a look at Bama players' Instagrams and well, it pays to be Bama

http://usc.247sports.com/Board/29/Contents/Alabamas-Recruiting-Dominance-Continues-Wow-50860219

# ¿ Jan 28, 2017 01:03

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

I'll preface this by saying I absolutely don't care and wish VT did this stuff but you guys really must be joking if you don't think at least some of these aren't loaners from dealers owned by Bama boosters or cars owned by agents and loaned out (this is part of what doomed UNC all those years ago). You're all fully old enough to understand how this sport works with blue chip recruits and various things like cars, money, jobs for parents, etc.

Crotch Bat fucked around with this message at 03:50 on Jan 28, 2017

# ¿ Jan 28, 2017 03:16

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

big money big clit posted:

Does Alabama not have white recruits or do they just not get cars?

That enormous black pickup was for backup QB David Cornwell, who has transferred recently.

# ¿ Jan 28, 2017 03:49

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

big money big clit posted:

Curiously not pictured standing near it, possibly because the sight of a cornfed white boy next to a lifted truck wouldn't strike anyone as out of sorts.

Like, the very first picture is of a Dodge Magnum, a car that hasn't existed since 2008, so it's at least six years old at that point. I guess we're supposed to believe that Alabama is plying a top recruit (in his sophomore year) with old dodges, and that's more believable than that his parents bought him a car that was likely dirt cheap at the time?

It's a really stupid post and the whole crux is the idea that these kids couldn't possible have Jeep Wranglers or pickups or an old BMW without something nefarious going on, ignoring the fact that plenty of non-football college kids also have those things.

Mostly true but even the USC fans in that thread acknowledge that Reggie Bush's car was a '99 which makes it about equally as old.

That's likely what these loaners are anyway is just cleaned up used cars. A kid driving around in a 2017 BMW is going to attract immediate attention, a 2010 at least passes the feasibility test.

Like I said, it's very much ado about nothing to me but this is part of why UNC got hosed. It's fairly shocking that nothing ever comes out about bigger programs, especially something like current day Bama, because you know that campus has to be absolutely swarming with agents ready to do anything and everything, like loan a kid a car for 9 months, to get them to sign with them.

# ¿ Jan 28, 2017 04:36

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

https://twitter.com/TMcFaddenWNDU/status/825861439063781378

# ¿ Jan 30, 2017 02:57

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

Lasagna Pilot posted:

Holy poo poo

That sounds like bullshit. Using Rivals, Texas had 2 in 2007, 3 in 2009, 2 in 2010, 1 in 2011, 2 in 2012, 1 in 2015, and 1 in 2016. That's 12 just by themselves. Unless Bama's class was 25 5* (which, hey, it's Bama) then it sounds like something someone just ran with or used some retarded metrics to make up.

e: They have 7 on Rivals this year which, while a shitload, is not more than a conference for a decade. There's no way they did more in a year than UT and OU did in a decade, at least not in recruiting.

Crotch Bat fucked around with this message at 03:19 on Feb 2, 2017

# ¿ Feb 2, 2017 03:17

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

swickles posted:

I think they mean in the last ten years, the Big 12 has never had more than 7 five stars in a given year.

That's definitely it and I misread it, thanks. That's also entirely believable since only Texas and OU recruit at such a level in that conference. I think Aggy has only gotten really good lately since they've been able to tout the SEC to kids.

# ¿ Feb 2, 2017 04:09

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

Yea, the word is he and assistants worked to bury the crimes as much as they could.

It's a slam dunk LOIC case. If it's even half true the NCAA should hit them into the Stone Age for it. Briles should be show-caused right back to high school football.

# ¿ Feb 3, 2017 03:33

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

pillsburysoldier posted:

gently caress off forever from football, Art

# ¿ Feb 3, 2017 04:48

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# ¿ Apr 28, 2024 19:50

Crotch Bat: Dec 6, 2003; Much like with everything else in life, the Euros seem to have more sense on how to do things in a fun atmosphere without sucking the soul out of the event.

There's no reason whatsoever that Baylor should field a football program for a decade and there's no reason Art Briles and his assistants should ever be allowed to coach the sport at any level.

I can't imagine what he said when he heard about the sexual assaults but I'm sure it'll make my skin crawl.

# ¿ Feb 3, 2017 05:51

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > The Football Funhouse > NCAA Offseason N/V: Home of the Bad Boy Mowers Gasparilla Bowl (awaiting Shark Bowl)

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