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OctoberBlues posted:I posted this in some other thread but last year I was thinking maybe I was drinking too much so I went three months with no alcohol/tobacco/weed and it did absolutely nothing. I didn't sleep better, I didn't lose weight, I didn't feel happier. Sobriety is bullshit is what I'm saying. Well just being sober but not working on underlying issues is the thing called dry drunk
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Feb 5, 2017 15:26
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Spirituality isn't so much about signing up for dogmatic Christian God but acknowledging the lack of control you actually can exercise in your life. Drunks in particular will sit and rage about the control they perceive they have when you really have even less than you'd think. Acknowledging this is something that leads to a sense of peace. Everything works out how it needs to because it couldn't any other way. You can see this thorough line through any religion or whatever
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Mar 22, 2017 03:24
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I guess I don't subscribe to a specific religion or anything so I have a difficult time understanding the precise issue and I've always been a pretty staunch atheist. It's cool and fine if people don't like AA or 12 step programs, but focusing on dogma is missing the point to me. Smart recovery tells you you have power and aren't helpless, and fundamentally so does AA (you decided to not drink today didn't you? You decided to start work on the Change you need) aside from the what is supposed to be humbling confession where you "admit your life ain't going how you always wanted it to go" in step 1. Considering the lengths I went to maintain my denial, it was necessary for me to claim the title of alcoholic. I would encourage exploring or seeking out agnostic or atheist recovery groups if that's your inclination and it's something that'll help. Really, if it helps, that's what matters. Doing it alone, I know it didn't work for me. The most frightening thing was always thinking I had a "time limit" that I was waiting to pass, and once things fell into place I'd automatically start drinking. Oh boy was it a treat when that time came and went and I was hitting it harder than before, feeling even more out of control than at any point before then. Connecting with you with supportive people who've been through the same wringer as you is really the focus anyway. Otherwise you have people saying "75 drinks a week!! That's nothing. Call me when you've learned how to really drink" Of course some people are going to lean into dogma but it's more of a pity IMO cause it's so boring. You'll also run into people who don't think you're "clean" unless you're not on any anti depressants either. Which is destructive as hell. To me, any spirituality is firmly planted inside yourself. "the reality deep down within you" and harnessing it doesn't rob you of anything. That well springs forth from within. Like nomad was saying earlier in the thread, what would your heart have you do? Ultimately I just want people to be happy with their lives and their choices. For themselves.
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Mar 22, 2017 20:00
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CaptainSarcastic posted:I don't think anybody has been arguing against the value of support groups in general, just that prescribing one particular flavor (e.g., AA) over another is not paying due diligence to the needs of the person being addressed. AA and related 12-step programs are not for me, for instance, but that doesn't mean I think nobody should use them. I'm fond of Refuge Recovery, but I'm not under the delusion that it would be a good fit for everyone. Not only are people different, but each person's addiction is different. For instance, you describe having denial be a significant part of your process, whereas for me denial was essentially absent - this leads to very different expressions of what may be otherwise similar addictions. Trying to advocate too much for a single path to recovery inevitably means a significant number of people are going to fall off it. Good point. I don't wanna be shoving people into holes or anything. It's good to be reminded of differences that I can take for granted or something that might seriously affect someone else's recovery.
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Mar 22, 2017 23:50
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