imagine having kids in your 20's

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > imagine having kids in your 20's

Punk da Bundo: Dec 29, 2006; by FactsAreUseless

just lmao

i need a babysitter if i wanna go out and have fun? the baby sitter needs MONEY? i have to pay for the kids to be watched while im at the old poo poo posting factory?

whenever i waste my money on something stupid i just laugh and say hehehe atleast i dont have KIDS

goons with kids how do you feel about your kids *puts microphone in your face*

and no this isnt a stupid goony post about kids, i wanna have a kid or two one day but when im a lot older and all the fun of life has been sucked dry

# ¿ Feb 19, 2017 01:16

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ¿ Apr 28, 2024 07:39

Punk da Bundo: Dec 29, 2006; by FactsAreUseless

grown man with no children: ahhh, wow i can do whatever i want

grown man with children: oh god, i cant play dark souls 3 for 12 hours straight, i gotta take care of the drat BABY

childless man: oh wow i goofed and spent too much at the casino, woops! lol

grown man: gently caress jayden cant go to college now

# ¿ Feb 19, 2017 04:20

Punk da Bundo: Dec 29, 2006; by FactsAreUseless

first of all

this thread wasnt supposed to be this serious i did not expect this level of response

second of all

my cousin teaches bougie white women in chicago, how to put the baby to sleep properly

she charges 300 dollars an hour for the class lmao

# ¿ Feb 19, 2017 08:40

Punk da Bundo: Dec 29, 2006; by FactsAreUseless

Hector Beerlioz posted:

You shake it a bunch, right?

(in extremely hillary banks voice* like, do not shake the baby, evarrrrrrr

# ¿ Feb 19, 2017 08:51

Punk da Bundo: Dec 29, 2006; by FactsAreUseless

this wasn't the lol poo poo on kids thread it was the hmm maybe I should not have kid at 20

every girl I know who has kids super early is extremely defensive about the decision and like it doesn't really change anything !! *dumps kids onto meemaw so they can party*

# ¿ Feb 19, 2017 19:39

Punk da Bundo: Dec 29, 2006; by FactsAreUseless

lol at the offended parents itt tho, "imagine playing VIDEOGAMES!!!"

# ¿ Feb 19, 2017 22:57

Punk da Bundo: Dec 29, 2006; by FactsAreUseless

"i love spending all this time and money on my kids"-nobody ever

could spend it on poo poo posts n drugz or sumfin

# ¿ Feb 19, 2017 23:18

Punk da Bundo: Dec 29, 2006; by FactsAreUseless

when my facebook friends post pics of themselves freezing their breast milk and ughh how HAPPY they are to be a mom and literally every post is MOM related

jesus post about something else too

# ¿ Feb 20, 2017 07:43

Punk da Bundo: Dec 29, 2006; by FactsAreUseless

my bat mitzvah ROCKED posted:

i know when im dying of cancer i will look fondly on my 20 and 30s and cherish all those times i got to watch netflix and playing video games instead of having a kid

"I'm...gay..." as I smile and die alone because I had no kids , or I had kids and they aren't there and will destroy each other fighting over their inheritance

# ¿ Feb 20, 2017 21:42

Punk da Bundo: Dec 29, 2006; by FactsAreUseless

My cousin doesn't even watch her kids the nannies do , lots of mommy time #blessed

# ¿ Feb 20, 2017 23:12

Punk da Bundo: Dec 29, 2006; by FactsAreUseless

Kaedric posted:

I gooned it up pretty hard in my 20s, partyin and doin dumb poo poo and playing an absolutely enormous amount of video games.

When I had a kid at 30 allllll that time spent just felt like an overwhelmingly stupid and self-indulgent waste of my loving life. Like, yes, kids are sometimes stressful. Just like having a job is to support your weed habit. Whatever. Raising someone in your family is awesome as gently caress, and I guess unless you hit the reverse lottery and pop out an unfixable shithead (P.S. usually lovely kids come from lovely parents) doing so is a great way to spend your life, with the added benefit of having something to look forward to when you can't go windsurfing off a mountaintop or whatever it is you are imagining you can do every weekend without children.

how was that wasteful? what is wrong with being a little heathen?

having a kid in your early 20's would suck so much poo poo, god drat. and this thread isnt about hating on people who have kids! stop it !

# ¿ Feb 21, 2017 01:50

Punk da Bundo: Dec 29, 2006; by FactsAreUseless

have 1 kid at 33 and another at 35, boom done. DONE!

or alternatively do what celebrities do and have more but at huge age gaps

# ¿ Feb 21, 2017 02:00

Punk da Bundo: Dec 29, 2006; by FactsAreUseless

A Strange Aeon posted:

It seems disingenuous to assert that all parents are secretly miserable and lie about their happiness while people who decide to not have children live fuller lives never once doubting their decision to forgo a fundamental human experience.

i dont know anybody in real life who is CHILD FREE AND FOREVER

that kind of attitude reminds me less of some kind of sweet dude partying and banging everything but more shut in IT weirdo who calls women females and children CROTCH SPAWNNN

# ¿ Feb 21, 2017 02:14

Punk da Bundo: Dec 29, 2006; by FactsAreUseless

if you genuinely dislike or hate children you are probably an awful, miserable human being

if you dont laugh or have kind of joy when your nieces or nephews say something really weird or funny that an adult couldnt get away with than smh

# ¿ Feb 21, 2017 02:16

Punk da Bundo: Dec 29, 2006; by FactsAreUseless

i am going to name my daughter Avril, after my favorite popstar

and my son, Giovanni, after the leader of team rocket from favorite video game, the pokemon

# ¿ Feb 21, 2017 22:17

Punk da Bundo: Dec 29, 2006; by FactsAreUseless

i know a couple who named they baby Zeus and the momma is muslim so this is several levels of blasphemy, i just dont understand

# ¿ Feb 21, 2017 22:30

Punk da Bundo: Dec 29, 2006; by FactsAreUseless

nickhimself posted:

One of two scenarios become inevitable when you have a kid:

A) you die first, leaving your child depressed (if you did everything right) which might be enough for them to commit suicide

B) they die first, leaving you depressed which may be enough to push you into committing suicide

Neither of those are worth the risk to me. Though truthfully, I've never felt that pull toward procreation at all. I don't care about babies. Sure, they can be cute, kids seem fun sometimes, but there's nothing at all in my brain that says "you really need one of these in your life, man!"

If you really want to be a parent, more power to you. Some of us truly do not have that urge whatsoever. My wife feels the same way, and it's perfect for us.

I'd never condemn someone for having kids in real life, and it'd be great if people wouldn't try to make me feel bad for not wanting kids casually in conversation when the topic comes up. That poo poo is so rude. My wife gets it way worse than I do, since people like to pretend they know more about how a woman should conduct herself than the woman condescendingly being told "oh, you'll change your mind."

you seriously think people commit suicide when their parents die? what the gently caress? most peoples parents die when they are in their 40's or 50's, you kind of get ready for it.

# ¿ Feb 21, 2017 22:44

Punk da Bundo: Dec 29, 2006; by FactsAreUseless

nickhimself posted:

I didn't say they WILL commit suicide. Hell, what if your kid decides to commit suicide before you even die? Or if your partner does it leaving you a single parent with a traumatized child.

Edit: those were worst case scenarios, too. It's not like that's going to be common

you sound a little paranoid, man. thats like worrying about getting in an accident everytime you get in the car. i'd be way more worried id gently caress the kid up somehow with my parenting style or something than what if baby Avril kill herself

# ¿ Feb 22, 2017 00:21

Punk da Bundo: Dec 29, 2006; by FactsAreUseless

i want a happy medium between the mommas i know whos entire identity now seems to be posting about their loving kids and SOULLESS AUTIST WHO COUNTS HIS GOLD KID FREE REEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

# ¿ Feb 22, 2017 00:31

Punk da Bundo: Dec 29, 2006; by FactsAreUseless

The Bible posted:

I had one kid about 2 years ago at 32.

It really is pretty draining. You don't sleep much, you have to watch them pretty much constantly, and any time they get sick it is terrifying on a number of levels. My wife absolutely refuses to help, and mostly just watches TV or sleeps while I do everything, so that makes things that much more stressful.

Despite that, I don't regret having him at all, but when I look at people with two kids, that poo poo blows my mind. My kid is out of the dreadfully awful Immobile Housebound Baby phase, and the idea of just punching the reset button on that now just boggles my mind.

It was 1 year before I felt anything but pure exhaustion. Things are way easier now. Why would anyone ever put themselves through that hell again?

your wife refuses to help you with your child? uhhhhhhh....divorce???

# ¿ Feb 22, 2017 00:58

Punk da Bundo: Dec 29, 2006; by FactsAreUseless

canyoneer posted:

Having kids is funny, because your parenting goalposts move a lot, especially as it relates to behavior in public.

Like when people snort and huff when they sit next to you and your kids on a plane. Hey dude, if you didn't want to risk sitting next to a baby on a 3 hour domestic flight, you should have paid more than $80 for your ticket! I've got a pretty limited toolbox here to chill the kids out!

r/childfree is a goldmine of bitter, angry people who are mad that children exist and it's sad and sometimes funny to encounter them in the wild.

griping online is one thing but to be a dick to a baby on a plane...smh..just smh...

plane travel sucks for everybody, unless you're in business or first class. its just like a big bus that flies, and aint nobody happy on a bus either

# ¿ Feb 22, 2017 01:01

Punk da Bundo: Dec 29, 2006; by FactsAreUseless

500 bad things posted:

lol the best is to fly first class with your screaming baby

a first class ticket from Detroit Mi, to Tirana, Albania is 11,000 dollars, THERE BETTER NOT BE ANY loving BABIES IN FIRST CLASS

# ¿ Feb 22, 2017 01:04

Punk da Bundo: Dec 29, 2006; by FactsAreUseless

*captain over loudspeaker* shut that loving baby up or ill crash this plane i swear 2 logic

# ¿ Feb 22, 2017 01:09

Punk da Bundo: Dec 29, 2006; by FactsAreUseless

I like to think of this thread as my child imo , and I love my dead gay forum

# ¿ Feb 22, 2017 15:29

Punk da Bundo: Dec 29, 2006; by FactsAreUseless

help, 1 twin keeps calling me a fag and the other twin keeps eating the dogs poop..

# ¿ Feb 22, 2017 22:11

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ¿ Apr 28, 2024 07:39

Punk da Bundo: Dec 29, 2006; by FactsAreUseless

yeah this somehow became the parenting /child free catch all thread but what can I say my child (this thread) is gonna do what it wants

i know this girl on my tinder I always swipe left on who's 22 and has FOUR kids . 4 . loving gently caress. I'm 28 and tbh I think my age range should be set to 25 minimum. Just lmao 4 kids 22

# ¿ Feb 23, 2017 00:45

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > imagine having kids in your 20's