Lol. Just Lol At The Nintendo Switch.

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > Lol. Just Lol At The Nintendo Switch.

Universe Master: Jun 20, 2005; Darn Fine Pie

Professor SJW posted:

what if mario real life ?!!

Oha mya god I havea to do the plumbing ah again.

Take-a me home-a princcess-a peach.

# ¿ Feb 21, 2017 01:36

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ¿ May 3, 2024 21:59

Universe Master: Jun 20, 2005; Darn Fine Pie

The dock, literally nothing but HDMI out and power in, costs $90. Hahaha

# ¿ Feb 23, 2017 15:35

Universe Master: Jun 20, 2005; Darn Fine Pie

Oscar Wild posted:

Why? I heard it's just part of the trans agenda, get it? Switch? Like gender? Like cut your dick/balls/tits off switch?

I really, really want to start spreading this on conservative websites

# ¿ Feb 23, 2017 19:05

Universe Master: Jun 20, 2005; Darn Fine Pie

Only a few days left until the many scalpers who got pre-orders get their Switches!

I'm so excited for this.

# ¿ Feb 25, 2017 16:57

Universe Master: Jun 20, 2005; Darn Fine Pie

Bombadilillo posted:

Idiots playing Zelda and keeping this company afloat. This prevents Zelda from being other platforms so the pc master race can play it.

New Zelda is just babby's first open-world game, complete with Ubisoft towers.

# ¿ Feb 25, 2017 18:33

Universe Master: Jun 20, 2005; Darn Fine Pie

Dr. Tim Whatley posted:

What wire doi need buy to to charge this poo poo in the car?

It will be a proprietary one that costs $200 each.

# ¿ Feb 25, 2017 21:49

Universe Master: Jun 20, 2005; Darn Fine Pie

Blue Raider posted:

i wish nintendo would unfuck itself and just make a console that plugs into a tv and nothing else, and is controlled by a wireless controller that looks like it wasnt conceived by a tard with 10 kinds of palsy

but but grandmas bought the wii

# ¿ Feb 25, 2017 23:00

Universe Master: Jun 20, 2005; Darn Fine Pie

sometimes in the elder scolls i play a gay mer.

# ¿ Feb 26, 2017 16:12

Universe Master: Jun 20, 2005; Darn Fine Pie

hope they fixed the framerate issue

# ¿ Feb 26, 2017 16:17

Universe Master: Jun 20, 2005; Darn Fine Pie

Guy Goodbody posted:

What's the problem with the framerate?

In all the demos they used an old build that couldn't maintain a consistent 30fps.

# ¿ Feb 26, 2017 16:26

Universe Master: Jun 20, 2005; Darn Fine Pie

i'm gonna wait for the cheaper non-tablet version, The Nintendo Stay-at-home.

# ¿ Feb 26, 2017 17:05

Universe Master: Jun 20, 2005; Darn Fine Pie

Sleeping black guy has his wedding ring on his thumb.

# ¿ Feb 26, 2017 19:46

Universe Master: Jun 20, 2005; Darn Fine Pie

WhyteRyce posted:

any flight long enough to warrant playing games on is way longer than the battery life of that thing

he bought the $500 external extra battery, duh

# ¿ Feb 26, 2017 19:49

Universe Master: Jun 20, 2005; Darn Fine Pie

He has headphones on but he's still gonna be shouting dragon shouts along with his character.

# ¿ Feb 26, 2017 19:58

Universe Master: Jun 20, 2005; Darn Fine Pie

Blue Raider posted:

i just wish it didnt do all the bullshit and was just a console and a controller

I'm series they should make a cheaper regular stay at home version of the console like they did with the 2ds.

# ¿ Feb 26, 2017 20:00

Universe Master: Jun 20, 2005; Darn Fine Pie

It's the Skyrim "Special" Edition

Short-bus version of special

# ¿ Feb 26, 2017 20:02

Universe Master: Jun 20, 2005; Darn Fine Pie

Professor SJW posted:

no i want to gently caress a hyrule prostitute

Zelda II

# ¿ Feb 27, 2017 13:42

Universe Master: Jun 20, 2005; Darn Fine Pie

JediTalentAgent posted:

As a slight derail, would many/any of the classic and new Nintendo franchises STILL be as hugely popular if Nintendo became a 3rd Party publisher or would they quickly be drowned out by other third party releases?

Nintendo would make a gently caress-ton of cash if they teamed with apple and made some sort of useful wrap around controller for the iphone. I think they are the only ones who could do it because people would be wary of buying a controller and a full price phone game unless it was Mario, Zelda, Metroid, etc.

They'd also keep making money on console/PC releases, without having console development costs, manufacturing costs and so on.

# ¿ Feb 28, 2017 13:35

Universe Master: Jun 20, 2005; Darn Fine Pie

Starfox is a not great as a franchise game because the first one was only neat because the Super FX chip let them do early 3d graphics on a SNES and nobody had really seen anything like that before.

# ¿ Feb 28, 2017 13:45

Universe Master: Jun 20, 2005; Darn Fine Pie

Uncle at Nintendo posted:

This is an actually interesting discussion on a forum that isn't gamefaqs.

As counterpoints to your arguments, Nintendo breaks even on consoles, and hell, sometimes they even make money on them.

Then there's the benefit of piracy being ridiculously difficult (compared to iPhone, Android, and PC) on consoles. Excluding the Wii because that thing was hacked within like 2 years of release (the 3DS and WiiU took forever).

And the final reason is Nintendo would no longer be able to charge $60 for games. You think they aren't going to take a huge hit when Super Mario 3D World 2 goes from them making a $45 profit per sale compared to $13? And how are you going to get games that are 20+ gigs to fit on an iPhone with 32gb of storage (that isn't upgradeable)? "Welp, my entire collection literally cannot be more than 3 games" is not something I would imagine they'd want many people saying.

I know this is nerd poo poo but I like talking business so if there are counterpoints to this I genuinely would like to discuss them!

The wrap around controller I had in mind was more of a semi-system, with additional storage and probably a cartridge slot for added options. I just think phone games are the future because practically everybody now is carrying a powerful graphics capable minicomputer in their pocket. Somebody is going to take advantage of that someday to make real games for it.

# ¿ Feb 28, 2017 16:39

Universe Master: Jun 20, 2005; Darn Fine Pie

You can run most indie games on 2001 e-machines desktop.

# ¿ Feb 28, 2017 23:01

Universe Master: Jun 20, 2005; Darn Fine Pie

Serak posted:

Left wireless controller regularly desyncs as well as losing responsiveness when covered by hand/not aimed directly at TV

Can't charge controllers while playing on TV without a $30 accessory

Can't lay the system down while it's in the stand

No ethernet in $90 stand which is literally nothing more than a fancy breakout box for HDMI + power socket.

Can't charge while using the flip-out stand as power socket is on bottom

Comes with 32GB of storage, of which 7GB is already used by the operating system

Games are super-compressed to fit in cartriges/suit use of memorycard storage

Internal specs designed to target 720p internals screen, flagship game can't achieve 30fps when running at 900p on TV

3 hour battery life when off charger

Region Locked

Friends, I think the Switch might be bad.

I'm very happy that next-next gen PC Zelda is a go.

# ¿ Mar 2, 2017 00:48

Universe Master: Jun 20, 2005; Darn Fine Pie

I can't wait to buy the region free all zelda games bundle version of breath of the wild from the steam PC store of 2021.

# ¿ Mar 2, 2017 00:59

Universe Master: Jun 20, 2005; Darn Fine Pie

Shaquin posted:

"A delayed game is eventually good, but a rushed game is forever bad." -Shigeru Miyamoto

Duke Nukem Forever

# ¿ Mar 2, 2017 15:04

Universe Master: Jun 20, 2005; Darn Fine Pie

Console gamers comparing their meager amounts of shovel-ware. Another victory for the PC master race. Steam shits out tons of it every day.

# ¿ Mar 2, 2017 16:55

Universe Master: Jun 20, 2005; Darn Fine Pie

bitmap posted:

sure are a lot of people falling over themselves to show how much they hate nintendo with them same old console wars lines

or it's a bad console with a bad launch

# ¿ Mar 3, 2017 13:12

Universe Master: Jun 20, 2005; Darn Fine Pie

I love playing slide shows. 10out of 10 best game ever.

# ¿ Mar 3, 2017 16:35

Universe Master: Jun 20, 2005; Darn Fine Pie

rear end cobra posted:

http://www.theverge.com/2017/3/2/14792262/nintendo-switch-internet-browse-public-hotspots

You can even kind of check your facebook on it

Somebody look up porn on a Switch, send a pic to Fox News.

"Top news of the hour, Nintendo is peddling smut to your children"

# ¿ Mar 3, 2017 17:46

Universe Master: Jun 20, 2005; Darn Fine Pie

It's all handled by the mandatory tutorial. Pay close attention. Left mouse button fires. Let's try that 10 more times.

# ¿ Mar 3, 2017 18:35

Universe Master: Jun 20, 2005; Darn Fine Pie

Also, the vidja game market has grown greatly, even since the mid-2000s Wii launch.

# ¿ Mar 7, 2017 10:34

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ¿ May 3, 2024 21:59

Universe Master: Jun 20, 2005; Darn Fine Pie

So many little Switch bits are gonna get dropped and lost by kids.

It may actually be worth it to buy those dumb store warranties retail slaves are forced to push.

# ¿ Mar 7, 2017 12:45

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > Lol. Just Lol At The Nintendo Switch.