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SatansOnion
Dec 12, 2011

VJeff posted:

Point at this man and laugh at his bad wrestling opinions.

Question: Since I am a softhearted dweeb, may I instead shake my head in befuddlement as though I had stumbled upon a post from a radically different dimension than this, the world in which Kevin Owens is a top-flight heel

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SatansOnion
Dec 12, 2011

Chrisley's mom seems like a cool lady who would be fun to drink/smoke weed with

no idea how her son got so lame, though

SatansOnion
Dec 12, 2011

Bill Goldberg posted:

feuding with rusev is the kiss of death

everyone else just looks so not-handsome in comparison, don't hate Rusev because he's beautiful :colbert:

SatansOnion
Dec 12, 2011

TheKingslayer posted:

You just know that guy is so repressed he's killing twinks on the weekends like Dahmer.

I personally get the feeling he's more of a poisoner by nature, since that's among the most passive-aggressive kinds of murder

SatansOnion
Dec 12, 2011

Abroham Lincoln posted:

shake his loving hand



THE Brian Kendrick is a stickler for formalities

SatansOnion
Dec 12, 2011

o/~all of these things made me who I am o/~

mediaconsumptionasidentity.mp4

SatansOnion
Dec 12, 2011

TheKingslayer posted:

Those spinning skulls are hilarious.

making the Magic Killers' Geocities page so baller

SatansOnion
Dec 12, 2011

Jerusalem posted:

Oh I already missed Owens? :smith:

He had an in-ring promo at the top of the show that was p. good, imo

Don't kick yourself too hard, though, since none of us could have predicted that RAW would open with someone who wasn't Roman, Mick and/or Stephanie

SatansOnion
Dec 12, 2011

Handsome Rusev in the Harrison Bergeron uglifying mask that keeps the crowd from being so dazzled by his perfect countenance that they forget to eat or move

poor Handsome Rusev

SatansOnion
Dec 12, 2011

exploded mummy posted:

Ice cream cannon

a huge cylinder of steel, spurting hundreds of gallons of sticky goodness that everyone wants to swallow

and something that shoots ice cream, that would be fun too

SatansOnion
Dec 12, 2011

Rhonne posted:

I hope Rusev and the New Day have a whole Wrestlemania feud over ice cream.

I'd be okay with New Day "hosting" Wrestlemania if it turned into a bitchin' backstage brawl with Rusev and his jacked friend in the turban

SatansOnion
Dec 12, 2011

Rhonne posted:

RIP You crazy hairy man you. :(

That shot of the Animal putting his hairy tree trunks around Mean Gene put me in mind of Koko the gorilla with a kitten. I laughed, and my heart was warmed

Come to think, I miss that sort of whimsy from those big scary monster dudes. The modern WWE Big Guy is supposed to be too much of a ~manly badass~ for it, I suppose

:smith::respek::smith:

SatansOnion
Dec 12, 2011

sportsgenius86 posted:

Hahahahaha they're all so obviously reading

Part of what makes these ring so hollow is how excruciatingly obvious it is that everyone involved is just kind of nodding along and paying lip service to these people who sure were historical golly gee whiz. These segments are obviously the product of a lot of people who don't quite understand why they're supposed to care about all this

:smith:

SatansOnion
Dec 12, 2011

Benne posted:

Trump already looked like poo poo when he got elected, can't imagine what he'll look like in 4 years.

You really think he's going to get through all four years before either getting impeached or ragequitting because Twitter is trolling him faster than he can block them all? I feel like that's a smidge optimistic, personally.

SatansOnion
Dec 12, 2011

CobiWann posted:

Oh dear God, SHUT THE MOTHERFUCKING gently caress UP STEPHANIE!

I would never hit a woman, but dear God I would shake the living hell out of Stephanie.

brb gonna start a pro wrestling career with the single life goal to humiliate Stephanie McMahon in the ring

I shall call myself...Gradolina

SatansOnion
Dec 12, 2011

DopeGhoti posted:

What's a "willchair"?

wherever you see one, there's a way

also, I just realized Charlotte's WOOOOO always sounds kind of unnatural. You gotta commit to the WOOOOO with a fuckload of cocaine onboard. A perfunctory WOOOOO is worse than no WOOOOO at all imo

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SatansOnion
Dec 12, 2011

Abroham Lincoln posted:

the ring is destroyed in the process

from the lifeless big show carcass, chris hero emerges, fat as gently caress

I know this Greek myth. What's Hero god of again?

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