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Punk da Bundo
Dec 29, 2006

by FactsAreUseless

Applesnots posted:

I met a girl on tinder and on the second date she gave me a sob story about her ex-husband left her. Turns out she drowned their infant child in the bathtub because jesus told her to do so. I am not kidding in the least.

close the thread. jesus christ.

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Punk da Bundo
Dec 29, 2006

by FactsAreUseless
one time a girl kept talking about sad stories about doggos, and then it reminded me of my doggo who got hit by a car, and we were drinking wine and i started tearing up because WHY, WHY DID YOU HAVE TO GET HIT BY THAT CAR

i don't feel bad at all about crying over my dead gay doggo tbh

that was only part of the date

Punk da Bundo
Dec 29, 2006

by FactsAreUseless
what the gently caress

Punk da Bundo
Dec 29, 2006

by FactsAreUseless
some of the worst dates ive been on were with doctors, because doctors only DOCTOR DOCTOR IM A DOCTOR IM SO BUSY IM A DOCTOR

oh so what do you like to do ...in your free...

I DONT HAVE FREE TIME, IM A DOCTOR, DOCTOR STUFF, DOCTOR DOCTOR

uhh..so do you like...being a ..

I DONT WANT TO TALK ABOUT DOCTOR STUFF, BECAUSE I DOCTOR ALL DAY LONG, DOCTOR, DOCTOR

Punk da Bundo
Dec 29, 2006

by FactsAreUseless
i cant imagine something most obnoxious than a doctor and a laywer on a date, or 2 doctors, or 2 lawyers

Punk da Bundo
Dec 29, 2006

by FactsAreUseless

Pick posted:

a 60-something multi-multi millionaire once took me on a date to a french restaurant, which he bought out for that evening

should have married him

lol why would a rich man want anything to do with you, dont lie

Punk da Bundo
Dec 29, 2006

by FactsAreUseless

Vargatron posted:

I'm surprised at how hard it is to find a woman who would be cool with getting stoned and listening to Vaporwave.

i could find 15 girls right now who would wanna do that. the gently caress. who doesnt like drugs and muzak

Punk da Bundo
Dec 29, 2006

by FactsAreUseless

Vargatron posted:

I dated this girl in high school when I 16 and I was ultra hype because this my first ever GF but of course my mom has to drive us around because I had a restricted license and couldn't have anybody under 21 in the car with me. Anyway my mom does me a solid and puts a bunch of groceries in the front seat so that me and my GF have to sit in the back seat (with of course my mom doing the whole "sly wink" bit). We get dropped off to the local bowling alley because that's what you do when you're 16. We slip off and make out in the back of the alley which was pretty awesome. We have several other dates like this and all is going well.

Summer rolls around and one of my friends invites me and my GF over to his parent's house to go out on the lake to wakeboard and water ski. Well my GF's brother gets invited over there as well and for some reason she is SUPER cold towards him and it kind of kills the whole vibe. We get to talking afterwards and apparently she had been sexually abused by her brother on the reg which was horrifying because he was one of the most popular guys in school and nobody would expect that. I try handling that as best I could to salvage the rest of the day but that was always an undercurrent the rest of the time we were together. Really lovely situation for her, but after meeting her parents I kind of saw the whole picture.

She invites me over to her parents house later on in the summer and as soon as I step in the house her dad is all over me asking who the gently caress I am. Apparently my GF was supposed to have one of her friends over there to "chaperone" us and make sure that we would do anything. Evidently this is the catalyst for an argument to break out which culminates with "MY BROTHER RAPED ME LAST SUMMER" getting yelled in the middle of the house. So here I sit as a shell shocked 16 year old with the roof crashing down trying to figure out what to do. Eventually her dad comes up to me and is like "look, I'm sure you're an alright kid, but you need to leave, this is getting out of hand".

Story doesn't end there though. My GF kept calling me in the middle of the night to sneak her out of the house and eventually I had to have a conversation where I was like "look, this isn't a good idea, we can't be doing this kind of thing", which prompted her to break up with me. It loving sucked, but at this point the game was getting too hot for me. Fast forward 4 weeks later and she's pregnant with the kid of a 21 year old that worked with her at Taco Bell. I later learned that she basically did that to get back at her parents for not doing anything about her brother.

This situation was nothing but :smith:. I've ran into her a few times around town and she's got 4 kids now, but the whole situation sucked because she was an honor student who had potential to go to an Ivy League school if she wouldn't have gotten knocked up.

Goddamn that's a loving downer :(

good god this is a depressing blink 182 song

Punk da Bundo
Dec 29, 2006

by FactsAreUseless

Lmao

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Punk da Bundo
Dec 29, 2006

by FactsAreUseless
plenty of fish is the walmart of dating

ive never seen dumber and uglier women

like, 4 kids at 28 poo poo. gently caress that. im sure the men are the equivalent

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