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Darkman Fanpage posted:i've gathered you all here today to inaugurate the first meeting of the council of citizens banned from shoney's. we are a diverse multitude who have suffered the humiliating stigma of those that have been unfairly banished from the shoney's in irondale, alabama. united in our cause we champion the rights of those persecuted by the shoney's management: tim whatley the evening manager and whats his face the guy that takes the morning shift. hi yes i was banned from the irondale, al, shoney's for the following (stupid) reasons: -asking for french dressing, then demanding to know why the ladle was not au francis -asking tim whatley, shoney's evening manager, irondale, al (go altamont knights), why he didn't have more school pride -asking tim whatley what, exactly, the shoney's bear (tim, night manager, dressed as mascot) thought he was made of -asking tim whatley if he was messing with me -asking tim whatley if he knew i was dating jessica, the girl he took to prom, spring 1999 -asking tim whatley if he knew jessica said the shoney's bear is stupid -asking tim if he knew what a Real Knight was made of -"insulting" tim's "coleslaw skills" -inviting tim whatley to an "asskicking bonanza" out back of "the real man's castle," Medieval Times, where i work, with MY GIRLFRIEND jessica (not tim's)
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Jul 21, 2017 21:18
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| # ? May 9, 2024 00:54 |
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I sung a rendition of the apprentice theme song to tim (whatley, the evening manager of the irondale, al shoney's) but I replaced every instance of "money" with "shoney" |
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Jul 21, 2017 21:27
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I showed my appreciation for Shoney's by cutting a promo dressed as Shoney's franchisee Scott "Big Poppa Pump, the Genetic Freak, the Big Bad Booty Daddy, Freakzilla" Steiner. I also did a lot of steroids as part of the costume which caused me to go into an uncontrollable rage and put multiple elderly patrons in the Steiner recliner Pinche Rudo fucked around with this message at 21:44 on Jul 21, 2017 |
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Jul 21, 2017 21:40
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I was banned because I asked for some salsa to put on my hash browns. I like to jazz my shreds up, you know? And the waitress just frowned and called the manager over, and he just sneered and asked me how I expected something like salsa in a Shoney's. Where did I, Mr. Fancy Boy, think I was? Freaking Italy?
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Jul 21, 2017 23:23
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I told the wait staff about the time in high school when Tim Whatley got busted with weed and the Vice-Principal called him "Tim Potleaf" in front of the whole school. They thought it was hilarious, but I guess Tim's still mad I turned him in. |
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Jul 22, 2017 06:20
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Brought in this menu and demanded they honor it. They didn't honor it so I gave them a 'dishonorable discharge' instead 
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Jul 22, 2017 07:19
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i ordered basghetti and they laughed at me and i realised id been saying it wrong my whole life and they said i gotta leave
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Jul 22, 2017 09:08
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DavidAlltheTime posted:Brought in this menu and demanded they honor it. Only one salad has green vegetables in it, you can take home a whole pie, and the shakes are "famous" in scare quotes. |
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Jul 22, 2017 13:33
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funny that when The Hulk's pants rip because they're too small for him, everyone claps and cheers, but when it happens to me I get politely but firmly ask to leave the buffet at the Irondale, AL Shoney's
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Jul 22, 2017 15:15
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So when circus people wrestle bears, it's perfectly fine despite the threat to themselves and those around them. When I wrestle the bear at the Irondale, AL Shoney's, the police are called while Tim Whatley was nowhere to be seen to take care of it himself. There were children there that night. Who's the real monster now, huh? Still glad Tim survived, though. It sounded like that bear swallowed him whole! |
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Jul 22, 2017 16:05
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i asked to meet "irondale" al shoney and they gave me a buncha flim flam about how no such person exists when its rite there in black and white dont gimme that... dont... im bein reasonable here i just wanna talk to al please i just wanna see al
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Jul 22, 2017 16:16
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little munchkin posted:funny that when The Hulk's pants rip because they're too small for him, everyone claps and cheers, but when it happens to me I get politely but firmly ask to leave the buffet at the Irondale, AL Shoney's
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Jul 22, 2017 16:19
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i also once worked at an alabama shoneys. actually i worked at two, and ive worked at two in ea tennessee restaurant drama is terrible and so is shoneys those hot fudge sundaes tho, and the weird pink moussefoam plus grapes were my fave |
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Jul 23, 2017 01:51
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there was a bear IN the restaurant saved everyone's lives, ungrateful bastards ---------------- |
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Jul 23, 2017 02:08
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Baller Ina posted:there was a bear IN the restaurant
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Jul 23, 2017 02:43
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shoneys sign. Breakfast. breakfast image. LUNCH. lunch image. dinner. salmon dinner image. shoneys logo. five stars. banned for life
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Jul 23, 2017 05:11
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*ADVISORY: These food items are (or may be) served undercooked, or contain (or may contain) undercooked ingredients, consuming raw or undercooked meats, poultry, seafood, shellfish or eggs may increase your risk of foodborne illness, especially if you have certain medical conditions. loudly reading the advisory to look out for the health and safety of customers ---------------- |
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Jul 23, 2017 07:03
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Conducting a Citizens' Health Inspection as is the right of every Sovereign Citizen. |
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Jul 23, 2017 18:28
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I should NOT have to pay the Banquet Room rental fee for what i consider a public service, an unannounced screening of my documentary film It's A Thick Book criticising Alabama's state government, especially when state representative Patricia Todd was holding her bi-weekly "Coffee with Congress" meet and greet session at the same time and as far as i know did not pay a "booking fee"
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Jul 23, 2017 18:40
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-drinking an entire bottle of ketchup, then leaving a 20 cent tip, because the ketchup wasn't flavorful -sniffing the salad bar for freshness -scratching and sniffing the salad bar, for fun -accusing night manager, Tim Whatley, of nepotism, because his girlfriend works for Big Boy out by the Ralph's on Crittenden -accusing night manager, Tim Whatley, of being a "fun-hating fish-filet-zealot" because he capped the all you can eat fish filet special at 60 filets -bringing my own bottle of ketchup to drink because their ketchup was not flavorful -bringing my own waitstaff and personal chef, because the fish filet limit was unworkable
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Jul 23, 2017 18:41
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i was allowed back in but promptly got rebanned when my grateful dead tribute band had an impromptu jam sesh using only instruments made from stuff we found in the kitchen. one of the mexican line chefs called us el diablos and that was it for us. banned for life. |
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Jul 23, 2017 21:36
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Darkman Fanpage posted:i was allowed back in but promptly got rebanned when my grateful dead tribute band had an impromptu jam sesh using only instruments made from stuff we found in the kitchen. one of the mexican line chefs called us el diablos and that was it for us. banned for life. you misunderstood, it was a compliment: "band 4 lyfe"
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Jul 23, 2017 21:44
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Manifisto posted:you misunderstood, it was a compliment: "band 4 lyfe" hehe |
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Jul 23, 2017 21:51
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im hoping that if my band offers to play tim whatley's wedding he'll unban us. |
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Jul 23, 2017 22:03
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Darkman Fanpage posted:im hoping that if my band offers to play tim whatley's wedding he'll unban us. I just got banned from the Shoneys for banging Tim's fiancee Jenna on the salad bar. Also, the wedding's off. Sorry. ---------------- |
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Jul 23, 2017 22:17
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on second thought asking tim for jennas number was prolly a bit o a faux pas
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Jul 24, 2017 00:32
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Baller Ina posted:on second thought asking tim for jennas number was prolly a bit o a faux pas well, i mean, it's not like they're together anymore anyway. gah, tim, you're so jealous.
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Jul 24, 2017 00:46
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somebody please marry tim so my band can play at the wedding |
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Jul 24, 2017 01:21
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Darkman Fanpage posted:somebody please marry tim so my band can play at the wedding ew no, just play at the denny's down the street. tim will be SO pissed.
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Jul 24, 2017 01:30
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Darkman Fanpage posted:somebody please marry tim so my band can play at the wedding as the singer for our band bLOOD ANUs, i second this, we need the work paul_soccer12 posted:everyone in the idf must die |
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Jul 24, 2017 01:47
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weird that we named our grateful dead tribute band bLOOD ANUs but good lol |
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Jul 24, 2017 02:16
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lol blood anus |
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Jul 24, 2017 02:45
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Darkman Fanpage posted:weird that we named our grateful dead tribute band bLOOD ANUs but good lol i thought it was your idea paul_soccer12 posted:everyone in the idf must die |
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Jul 24, 2017 04:31
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mister magpie posted:i thought it was your idea ugh, no, it was tim whatley's, former bassist of bLOOD ANUs, idea. but he got kicked out of the band because his job at shoney's as night manager was interfering with practice (also he stopped letting us practice in the walk in freezer because he said his boss didn't want us smoking "black tar reefer" in there anymore, whatever that means.)
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Jul 24, 2017 04:33
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god, tim sucks
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Jul 24, 2017 06:11
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more like tim whatajerk im writing a letter to al shoney, ceo of AL Shoney's of Irondale, AL complaining about tim's attitude and general demeanour which i assume is not consistent with AL Shoney's of Irondale, AL corporate guidelines vis a viz attitude and general demeanour of tim whatajerk
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Jul 24, 2017 13:12
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Baller Ina posted:god, tim sucks tell me about it. he just kicked me out of the irondale, al shoney's DURING THE MORNING because i was standing on the breakfast buffet using french toast sticks as weapons. DON'T BE HERE IN THE MORNING, TIM, NIGHT MANAGER. NIGHT. MANAGER. NOT MORNING. we were having a great time, TIM. also the dishwasher still owes me $25 for weed so i'm fuckin OUTTA here.
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Jul 24, 2017 15:32
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| if its really an all you can eat breakfast buffet then what exactly is the problem with me eating scramble eggs directly from the hot tray and also sneezing all over the rest of the food huh smart guy | |
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Jul 24, 2017 16:29
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Tim's always been a dick, but he's having a bad week. He thought he was up for the Day Manager position but it went to Trent, the Central Alabama General Manager's nephew from Montgomery. Trent's a preppy douchebag, but I don't think he has a weed hookup yet. He'll probably unban us if I share some of my Colorado wax with him. ---------------- |
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Jul 24, 2017 18:00
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The X-man cometh posted:Tim's always been a dick, but he's having a bad week. He thought he was up for the Day Manager position but it went to Trent, the Central Alabama General Manager's nephew from Montgomery. lol tim will be so pissed, you promised him a half gram. wow. how's jenna?
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Jul 24, 2017 21:40
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