UKMT August 2017 - Towns and Cities Ranked on the Bristol Scale

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Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

Welcome to the Mother Base, comrades. :anarchists:

In The News
� John Walker wins a landmark ruling at the Supreme Court, giving his husband the same pension rights as a wife would receive.
� EDF invents a new type of mathematics to quantify the revised cost of completing Hinkley Point C.
� Tory MP Anne Marie Morris experiences suspense over who might be in her woodpile. Good thing her whip has been taken away.
� The government announces more than �100m of investment in the UK's space sector, enough to buy half a Mercury-Redstone launch.
� A BBC producer terrifies and assaults a family by performing a false arrest, grabbing a man's throat, and threatening to kill people. It's unknown whether he will be charged with impersonating a police officer.
� A couple of cunts ride around London on a moped throwing drain cleaner at people, prompting the Home Office to consider licensing for any drain cleaner powerful enough to clean drains.
� Everyone ends up so skittish due to the above that the entire island of Jersey apologises for some kids squirting water at a tourist.
� The Government announces plans to introduce registration and safety awareness courses for radio control helicopters after fears they could pose a danger to aircraft.
� Crime has gone up by the largest annual rise in a decade, increasing by 10% overall, with violent crime up by 18%. Consequences of austerity and sanctions? Nah, time to ban some more stuff. Maybe vampire spoons or Frankenstein's chopsticks this time.
� Brexit talks end without agreement yet again, this time about payment and citizens' rights. Days until Brexit: lol
� The Liberal Democrats switch to Cable.
� UKIP loses control of their last local authority.
� New �10 polymer banknote is out this month, featuring Jane Austen.

goddamnedtwisto's Indecent Exposition

In which goddamnedtwisto writes at length about internet porn, obscenity, and spaghetti bolognese.
The Porn Identity
The Porn Supremacy
The Porn Ultimatum

UKMT Summer School
Stop, Thief!: The Commons, Enclosures, And Resistance � Peter Linebaugh
Libertarian Communism � Isaac Puente Amestoy
At The Caf� � Malatesta
The Method of Freedom � Malatesta
In Praise of Idleness � Russell
Political Ideals � Russell
Declaration � Hardt and Negri
Liberalism, a Counter History � Domenico Losurdo
God and the State � Bakunin
The Conquest of Bread � Kropotkin
Imperialism, the Highest Stage of Capitalism � V I Lenin
Anarchism and Other Essays � Emma Goldman
Social Reform or Revolution � Rosa Luxemburg
Violence � Slavoj Zizek
Jihad vs. McWorld - Benjamin Barber
Flat Earth News - Nick Davies
Ecology of Freedom � Murray Bookchin
Anarchism, Marxism and the Future of the Left � Murray Bookchin
Let's Read Das Kapital � Karl Marx and Goons

The Dog Days Are Here Again

National Burger Day
All Previous UKMTs (thanks Pesky Splinter)

Lughnasadh
Scotpol Thread

Black Ribbon Day
EDL/Fash Thread

International Day for the Remembrance of the Slave Trade and its Abolition
Europol Thread

Go Topless Day
Paedogeddon/Press Corruption Thread

International Biodiesel Day
Trainchat Thread

International Clown Week
Political Cartoons Thread

World Wide Web Day
#ukgoons on synIRC (thanks crispix).

Glorious Twelfth

quote:

1. It's not a person's fault if they are poor;
2. It's not their fault if they are disabled;
3. Neo-liberalism doesn't work;
4. The Daily Mail lies (maybe even about Pig Dave and charity);
5. Neo-liberalism has never worked;
6. The British Empire was not a force for good;
7. Neo-liberalism will never work;
8. Trans people are not "men in dresses";
9. Gendered insults are not okay;
10. If something is "so gay" it had better be something that is really happy;
11. Trains are awesome;
12. The history of all hitherto existing society is the history of class struggles;
13. Ni dieu, ni ma�tre, nae hope.

UKMT Commissars (thanks feedmegin)

quote:

Last month I came up with the idea of a register of goons and their CLPs in case any new joiners wanted someone to go to to get the local lie of the land.

feedmegin - Loughborough (only just got here though!)
maugrim - Dulwich and West Norwood
Autonomous Monster - Edinburgh Central (s?)
Lord of the Llamas - Edinburgh Central, Ipswich
Cast_no_shadow - Sheffield south east
Oh dear me - St Austell & Newquay
mehall - Cunninghame North/South ('s partner)
waffle - Southampton (Test)
mfcrocker,Barry Foster - Bristol West
MikeCrotch - Broxtowe
Jakabite - Manchester Central
SpaceCommie - Oxford East
Rolled Cabbage - Bexleyheath and Crayford
Borrovan - Swansea West
Stoic Fnord - SE Cambridgeshire
Kegluneq - Hyndburn
Niric - Glasgow Southside/Central
spiderbot - Enfield Southgate
Irving Washington - Leeds North East
Wolfsbane - Salisbury CLP (and Salisbury Momentum, which is now a thing that actually exists)

Thanks winegums.

Thanks blunt.

Guavanaut fucked around with this message at 02:01 on Aug 7, 2017

# ? Aug 1, 2017 00:03

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# ? May 12, 2024 00:22

Spangly A: May 14, 2009; God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall

Jeremy Corbyn is the next PM and the daily mail are going to get gulag'd, insha'allah

# ? Aug 1, 2017 00:07

JFairfax: Oct 23, 2008; by FactsAreUseless

dominos is bad pizza

# ? Aug 1, 2017 00:09

Ratjaculation: Aug 3, 2007

Gregggggggggggggssss

# ? Aug 1, 2017 00:11

Doctor_Fruitbat: Jun 2, 2013

Dominos makes me want to lie on the floor and die after eating it, but then I guess that's half the point of pizza.

# ? Aug 1, 2017 00:18

ShaneMacGowansTeeth: May 22, 2007; I think this is it... I think this is how it ends

Ratjaculation posted:

Gregggggggggggggssss

I remember walking into a Greggs and asking for a bacon baguette and the guy looked almost in tears when he said they only had wholemeal baguettes left, but I was all "it's bacon in bread, give it me"

# ? Aug 1, 2017 00:20

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

A few times I got a Greggs cheese and onion pasty at the perfect temperature and it was great. The chicken bakes have gone from reasonable if you can use commando precision timing to get the temperature right to made from the chickens that PETA makes videos about over the past decade though.

# ? Aug 1, 2017 00:24

Pochoclo: Feb 4, 2008; No...; Clapping Larry

The bad thing about pasties is that they're not empanadas. The dough is too thick and stiff, and the filling has too much tuber stuff in it.

Your typical beef empanada will look something like these (please ignore that green stuff ramekin, that's an abomination - empanadas are eaten on their own, except some people who squeeze some lemon into them, but they're outliers):

There's also deep fried empanadas, which are really delicious if done right, but also quite heavy and a bit of a kick on the liver

Empanadas are probably the single most ordered delivery food in Argentina and for good reason - they're convenient and delicious, and in Argentina from a normal empanada neighborhood delivery shop you can get like 10 different flavours - beef, spicy beef, ham & cheese, bacon with cheese and plum, blue cheese and walnuts, and god knows what else really. It's really varied though you wouldn't know from the stuff you get at argentine-themed restaurants here, which is just beef and ham & cheese maybe.

# ? Aug 1, 2017 00:29

Ratjaculation: Aug 3, 2007

Argentina is the enemy fyi

# ? Aug 1, 2017 00:31

Thanks Ants: May 21, 2004; #essereFerrari

Guavanaut posted:

Thanks blunt.

# ? Aug 1, 2017 00:33

JFairfax: Oct 23, 2008; by FactsAreUseless

i like tamales

# ? Aug 1, 2017 00:33

Pochoclo: Feb 4, 2008; No...; Clapping Larry

Ratjaculation posted:

Argentina is the enemy fyi

Yeah but the food is fine

EDIT: I have a deep loving craving for empanadas

# ? Aug 1, 2017 00:34

Angepain: Jul 13, 2012; what keeps happening to my clothes

can the government just collapse already please thankyou

# ? Aug 1, 2017 00:34

big scary monsters: Sep 2, 2011; -~Ｓｋｕｌｌｗａｖｅ~-

Greggs is shite and you all know it's shite.

# ? Aug 1, 2017 00:39

Pochoclo: Feb 4, 2008; No...; Clapping Larry

I never had Greggs but I had some M&S sausage rolls and they're quite good cold.

# ? Aug 1, 2017 00:44

TinTower: Apr 21, 2010; You don't have to 8e a good person to 8e a hero.

Empanadas in exchange for the Falklands sounds like a fair deal, tbh.

# ? Aug 1, 2017 00:47

Jrbg: May 20, 2014

The true connoisseur's choice of baked goods is Poundbakery

# ? Aug 1, 2017 01:09

Kokoro Wish: Jul 23, 2007; Post? What post? Oh wow.
I had nothing to do with THAT.

I thought a friends was weird for liking his pizzas with green peppers, jalapenos and pineapple on it. Then I tried it and I will happily have that next to my one with garlic, spinach, parmesan and an egg cracked in the middle of it.

# ? Aug 1, 2017 01:16

hakimashou: Jul 15, 2002; Upset Trowel

Do they actually have good pizza in Britain? I don't think i've ever had pizza the times I was there.

# ? Aug 1, 2017 01:24

Namtab: Feb 22, 2010

I'm hard, left

# ? Aug 1, 2017 01:25

Thanks Ants: May 21, 2004; #essereFerrari

Gotta have chilis on a pizza

# ? Aug 1, 2017 01:30

ThomasPaine: Feb 4, 2009; We have no compassion and we ask no compassion from you. When our turn comes, we shall not make excuses for the terror.

Kokoro Wish posted:

I thought a friends was weird for liking his pizzas with green peppers, jalapenos and pineapple on it. Then I tried it and I will happily have that next to my one with garlic, spinach, parmesan and an egg cracked in the middle of it.

poo poo I thought my friend invented that. Add haggis if you're ever in Scotland for good times

# ? Aug 1, 2017 01:33

Namtab: Feb 22, 2010

I just like pepper oni

# ? Aug 1, 2017 01:35

Ms Adequate: Oct 30, 2011; Baby even when I'm dead and gone
You will always be my only one, my only one
When the night is calling
No matter who I become
You will always be my only one, my only one, my only one
When the night is calling

Namtab posted:

I just like pepper oni

Red oni, blue oni, as long as it tops the pizza it's a good oni.

# ? Aug 1, 2017 02:55

TomViolence: Feb 19, 2013; PLEASE ASK ABOUT MY 80,000 WORD WALLACE AND GROMIT SLASH FICTION. PLEASE.

Namtab posted:

I'm hard, left

I'm Danny Dyer and I'm about to meet Britain's Hardest left.

# ? Aug 1, 2017 03:25

Crosspeice: Aug 9, 2013

TomViolence posted:

I'm Danny Dyer and I'm about to meet Britain's Hardest left.

Greetings

# ? Aug 1, 2017 04:07

Miftan: Mar 31, 2012; Terry knows what he can do with his bloody chocolate orange...

ThomasPaine posted:

Add haggis if you're ever in Scotland for good times

This is never good advice.

# ? Aug 1, 2017 04:25

mycomancy: Oct 16, 2016

I almost immigrated to the UK from the US for a job in Minehead. Would this have been a bad idea?

# ? Aug 1, 2017 04:59

Ms Adequate: Oct 30, 2011; Baby even when I'm dead and gone
You will always be my only one, my only one
When the night is calling
No matter who I become
You will always be my only one, my only one, my only one
When the night is calling

Right I might eat a probie for this, there's nothing I can see in the rules but it feels a little slimy. Fortunately, I am a goon, so I am comfortable enough with slime.

Look short version is I'm marrying a lovely lass from America, and we're now getting close to the point where I gotta shell out $$$ for the visa stuff, traveling to London at least twice (Not a really long way but wanna pay my folks for petrol if possible), shipping stuff, actually flying to America, all that jazz. Our friends and family have done a huge amount to help us already and we can probably squeak through as it is, but I'm gonna throw this GoFundMe out there and see if any UKMT goonpals are feeling generous, help put us in a more secure place.

https://www.gofundme.com/huxandsteph

Anyway that's the only time I'll post it now back to your regular scheduled arguments about food.

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

# ? Aug 1, 2017 05:00

Miftan: Mar 31, 2012; Terry knows what he can do with his bloody chocolate orange...

You have a fantastic name

# ? Aug 1, 2017 05:04

Kegluneq: Feb 18, 2011; Mr President, the physical reality of Prime Minister Corbyn is beyond your range of apprehension. If you'll just put on these PINKOVISION glasses...

Miftan posted:

You have a fantastic name

Did you see his middle name? I assume he'll be travelling to the US via steampunk airship.

I'd chip in a bit but a tiny baby is currently going to be draining any spare funds I have for the next 18 years or so. Hope you make your goal though, Mister Adequate!

# ? Aug 1, 2017 05:15

Blasmeister: Jan 15, 2012; 2Time TRP Sack Race Champion

Papa Johns does pretty good delivery pizza. Feel bad giving that prick money though.

# ? Aug 1, 2017 05:30

GEORGE W BUSHI: Jul 1, 2012

Blasmeister posted:

Papa Johns does pretty good delivery pizza. Feel bad giving that prick money though.

wait, who's papa john?

# ? Aug 1, 2017 05:38

Blasmeister: Jan 15, 2012; 2Time TRP Sack Race Champion

Baron Corbyn posted:

wait, who's papa john?

American rear end in a top hat who's really into exploiting workers and putting himself on pizza boxes.

http://uk.businessinsider.com/papa-johns-ceo-speaks-out-on-regulation-2017-1?r=US&IR=T

# ? Aug 1, 2017 05:54

TomViolence: Feb 19, 2013; PLEASE ASK ABOUT MY 80,000 WORD WALLACE AND GROMIT SLASH FICTION. PLEASE.

Mister Adequate posted:

Right I might eat a probie for this, there's nothing I can see in the rules but it feels a little slimy. Fortunately, I am a goon, so I am comfortable enough with slime.

Look short version is I'm marrying a lovely lass from America, and we're now getting close to the point where I gotta shell out $$$ for the visa stuff, traveling to London at least twice (Not a really long way but wanna pay my folks for petrol if possible), shipping stuff, actually flying to America, all that jazz. Our friends and family have done a huge amount to help us already and we can probably squeak through as it is, but I'm gonna throw this GoFundMe out there and see if any UKMT goonpals are feeling generous, help put us in a more secure place.

https://www.gofundme.com/huxandsteph

Anyway that's the only time I'll post it now back to your regular scheduled arguments about food.

I have literally no money, like negative money, but I wish you the best of luck nonethheless.

# ? Aug 1, 2017 06:00

Ms Adequate: Oct 30, 2011; Baby even when I'm dead and gone
You will always be my only one, my only one
When the night is calling
No matter who I become
You will always be my only one, my only one, my only one
When the night is calling

Miftan posted:

You have a fantastic name

Kegluneq posted:

Did you see his middle name? I assume he'll be travelling to the US via steampunk airship.

I'd chip in a bit but a tiny baby is currently going to be draining any spare funds I have for the next 18 years or so. Hope you make your goal though, Mister Adequate!

TomViolence posted:

I have literally no money, like negative money, but I wish you the best of luck nonethheless.

Thank you for the name compliments

I changed it via deed poll over a decade ago now, my birth name was Iayn Kiir Pyotr Opik, which was... not a great time in school? Especially going by Kiir which my parents raised me to do for some reason? (it's pronounced like Liir, or if you're not a SotS veteran, queer) And I didn't exactly want my dad's name to be mine because he was a raging prick. Anyway that's that story. (Also I've mentioned before but if you're wondering yes, I'm related to Lembit, he's my uncle.)

I understand 100% that times are tough all around and honestly I'm grateful that anyone would do so much as take the time to wish us well

Good luck with the tiny human, Kegluneq!

# ? Aug 1, 2017 06:10