| im really not sure how this even happened but i broke everything, literally every single thing there is. my spine is snapped in half and the office is on fire, please send help immediately | |
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Aug 23, 2017 17:56
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| # ? Jun 4, 2024 16:09 |
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i tried to drink a cup of water earlier but the cup and water somehow combined into a very disturbing sludge that oozed out of my hands entirely
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Aug 23, 2017 17:57
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i tried to call 911 re: my spine but my phone started screeching at me very loudly and it hasnt stopped for the last 30 minutes, i dont really expect it to ever stop at this point
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Aug 23, 2017 17:59
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ahhhhh poo poo i broke a nail typing this and also all my fingers, this day is truly awful
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Aug 23, 2017 18:00
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I've sent three ambulances and a firetruck so far, but all stopped responding when they came within a quarter mile of your location. Sorry.
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Aug 23, 2017 18:00
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hockey jockey posted:I've sent three ambulances and a firetruck so far, but all stopped responding when they came within a quarter mile of your location. Sorry. the firetruck actually crashed through the wall and caught fire ---------------- |
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Aug 23, 2017 18:03
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| I'll same day air you a bulk order of duct tape from Amazon | |
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Aug 23, 2017 18:07
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Ride The Gravitron posted:I'll same day air you a bulk order of duct tape from Amazon *delivery drone crashes thru the window and knocks over the china hutch and then the duct tape pakcage catches fire* |
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Aug 23, 2017 18:35
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alnilam posted:*delivery drone crashes thru the window and knocks over the china hutch and then the duct tape pakcage catches fire* what am i even gonna do with an infomercial about ducts on vhs jeez louise |
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Aug 23, 2017 18:44
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| My money!!! I'm broke! | |
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Aug 23, 2017 18:57
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*skates in, pops an ollie and suffers massive femoral damage* hell ya, im here, what'd i miss
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Aug 23, 2017 19:23
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| a projector in the meeting room started spewing smoke and now its showing brokeback mountain | |
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Aug 23, 2017 19:27
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*falls into the papershredder tie-first* everything's good here, nothing to see! *is ribboned and crosscut violently* I LOVE MY JOOOOB
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Aug 23, 2017 19:29
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Clit Eatswood posted:I LOVE MY JOOOOB it turns out that the most broke thing, is are brains..... Makes u think |
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Aug 23, 2017 19:31
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AverySpecialfriend posted:it turns out that the most broke thing, is are brains..... Makes u think
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Aug 23, 2017 19:42
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Sounds like a case of the Mondays, OP. *points at "Hang in there!" kitty poster* |
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Aug 23, 2017 19:43
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average joe trying to leave for work in the morning: my car broke down! im gonna be late for work, i cant even believe it! *camera pans up and out, revealing a city engulfed in flames in every direction* |
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Aug 23, 2017 19:45
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Jolo posted:Sounds like a case of the Mondays, OP. gently caress now im really sad imagining the hang in there kitty's branch breaking 
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Aug 23, 2017 19:45
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the only motivational posters in this office are portraits of long-dead advertising models named valerie and they are all super angry
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Aug 23, 2017 19:45
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Wey ta goe' U borke tha Englash langwage :angary: |
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Aug 23, 2017 20:18
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I was about to respond to this thread while waiting at the laundromat, but suddenly all the washing machine doors blew open spewing a deluge of suds and strangers' underpants out into the street! I had to use my phone as a tiny surfboard to escape, and swyped this post with my toes. |
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Aug 24, 2017 16:19
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im sending you my throughts and prayers op goon bless
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Aug 24, 2017 21:52
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AverySpecialfriend posted:im really not sure how this even happened but i broke everything, literally every single thing there is. my spine is snapped in half and the office is on fire, please send help immediately I will send a byob sticker to the first person who is able to help avsf with this situation, this is a crisis, lets pull together as a community
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Aug 24, 2017 23:58
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| what the heck.. my reward sticker just ripped in half? | |
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Aug 24, 2017 23:59
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I burst onto the scene in my superhero costume to save the day only to have all my zippers, buckles, buttons and shoelaces instantly become unfastened exposing my secret identity as the guy that's always doing the awkward low-budget commercials for his pawn shop on the local TV station
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Aug 25, 2017 01:34
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what if a man brings onto this scene such a device as a generic thing breaker, which then duly break, transforming it into the broken thing breaker. or is it transformed into the thing mender. is this a valid solution to your problem. i understand it's highly hypothetical but please consider this. actually gently caress it this is a particularly childish bit of nonsense on my part. years later i'm still loving stupid and a waste of post space |
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Aug 25, 2017 13:42
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try rebooting op |
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Aug 25, 2017 13:52
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Milde posted:what if a man brings onto this scene such a device as a generic thing breaker, which then duly break, transforming it into the broken thing breaker. or is it transformed into the thing mender. is this a valid solution to your problem. i understand it's highly hypothetical but please consider this. broke my brain right here thats a good philosophical question imo |
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Aug 25, 2017 16:10
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AverySpecialfriend posted:im really not sure how this even happened but i broke everything, literally every single thing there is. my spine is snapped in half and the office is on fire, please send help immediately Status: Resolved (Workaround) Resolution: If the office burns down, then we will not need to fix reporter's spine, or put out the fire once the office burns down entirely. |
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Aug 25, 2017 16:49
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I'd like to help but I think you broke me 
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Aug 26, 2017 00:09
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Twenty Four posted:I'd like to help but I think you broke me And u just broke my heart 
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Aug 26, 2017 00:14
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come on friends we can do better, op is still suffering from a breakage of literally every thing that can be broken, why cant we help?? I am extending the offer of remuneration from a byob sticker to a byob sticker and a hug. pls help!!!
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Aug 26, 2017 01:28
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| I tried to think of a solution but the link between my two brain halves broke please stand by | |
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Aug 26, 2017 01:46
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All I got is a plan that's prohibitively expensive. It would really break the bank. |
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Aug 26, 2017 09:41
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op also broke wind, lol |
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Aug 26, 2017 11:23
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op broke everythng? hahaha, im cracking up! ---------------- |
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Aug 28, 2017 04:21
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AverySpecialfriend posted:i tried to call 911 re: my spine but my phone started screeching at me very loudly and it hasnt stopped for the last 30 minutes, i dont really expect it to ever stop at this point it's an amber alert your car was stolen to rob a wicker basket of kittens from an old lady now the old lady's heart is broken
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Aug 28, 2017 07:33
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AverySpecialfriend posted:And u just broke my heart Maybe, together, we can mend our broken hearts, and all will work out!
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Aug 28, 2017 12:47
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Breaking News: We interrupt this broadcast of 2 Broke Girls to bring you this update on OP's situation. Spine: Still broken, Office: Aflame, Hearts Worldwide: Broken, Current Broadcast: Breaking..... Broken... We now return you to your ongoing broadcast of Two Unbroke Boys.
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Aug 29, 2017 14:41
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| # ? Jun 4, 2024 16:09 |
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THE GOOD NEWS IS I FIXED THE CIRCUIT BREAKER the bad news is I split all the atoms at the nuclear power plant so there's still no power https://i.imgur.com/QKTkerO.mp4 |
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Aug 29, 2017 14:57
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