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I for one would make sure all bathrooms had the most comfortable toilet paper with plenty of ply.
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Aug 29, 2017 22:16
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id install those urinals that go all the way to the floor because they are the superior urinal design
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Aug 29, 2017 22:17
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Go on travel all the time or "work from the field" and not even show up at the office 75% of the time and only show up to interview new employees
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Aug 29, 2017 22:17
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Instead of a 15 minute break every two hours I'd give alternating 5 and 10 minute breaks every hour then I'd relocate the break room to the farthest side of the building
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Aug 29, 2017 22:19
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Force employees to act as my downlines in my new MLM scam under threat of being fired.
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Aug 29, 2017 22:20
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I'd make sure my private bathroom had the most comfortable high ply toilet paper, but save the company money by putting 1-ply in all the other bathrooms
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Aug 29, 2017 22:21
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Drink an entire 2 liter of mountain dew and then belch out God Bless America
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Aug 29, 2017 22:21
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put it into power stance shift weight forward on hips mansplain that bitch i hired
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Aug 29, 2017 22:23
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Open a branch in eastern europe or on the côte d'ivoir so I can more easily sexually exploit employees without danger of legal repercussions
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Aug 29, 2017 22:25
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Create a green room where I'd hire a weed dealer to hang out and sell weed to the employees.
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Aug 29, 2017 22:31
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i would pee in the middle of the office in front of all my staff so everyone would know i am top dog and this is my turf
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Aug 29, 2017 22:35
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Force everyone to farm gold in World of Warcraft.
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Aug 29, 2017 22:39
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i would have diarrhea in a filthy hovel in the woods
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Aug 29, 2017 22:57
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"Alright we're gonna make some BIG changes around here. FIRST OFF, NO SCREWIN OFF! Psych I'm just kidding you guys know I'm cool right? But really though keep the screwin off to a minimum I'm not playin around." 
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Aug 29, 2017 22:58
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My authority can only be challenged by a game Blood Bowl third edition. NO ELVES
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Aug 29, 2017 23:00
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My secretary
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Aug 29, 2017 23:20
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- Hire mostly pretty black haired Latinas or pretty goth girls. - bring your dog to work Fridays - grab bag bonuses ranging from free puppy/breed of your choice, case of Count Chocula breakfast cereal, totem pole carving or sword fighting classes. - open up the network to allow access to STEAM during lunch. Go eat or go shoot each other in the face over XCOM2. - pump darkwave or post rock into the break rooms. - taco truck Mondays
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Aug 29, 2017 23:26
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Blue Train posted:My secretary 
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Aug 29, 2017 23:32
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jack off
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Aug 29, 2017 23:41
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I make a dollar, they make a dime. I'll take a poo poo anytime.
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Aug 29, 2017 23:45
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Hire someone to do my job for half my pay then do nothing but take credit.
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Aug 29, 2017 23:48
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I'd text all my employees '9am start tomorrow' every single night even though we always start at 9am.
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Aug 29, 2017 23:58
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Dick, I'm very dissapointed
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Aug 30, 2017 00:06
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the boss of what? MY LIFE? GET REAL OP
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Aug 30, 2017 00:06
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I'd let the power trip go to my head for a while and then cry and give up.
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Aug 30, 2017 00:08
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poo poo on Deborahs desk
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Aug 30, 2017 00:29
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Sip thoughtfully from my "#1 Boss" coffee mug
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Aug 30, 2017 01:24
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Make more money than anyone else.
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Aug 30, 2017 01:28
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Have a framed picture of a luxury car on my desk but bike to work every day.
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Aug 30, 2017 01:30
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I would fire the dude who decided sandwich cake instead of danishes was acceptable to order for a meeting. If you don't have danishes why even call a meeting? People will just walk in, see the sandwich cake, turn 360 degrees, walk towards the sandwich cake, and spit on it in disdain.
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Aug 30, 2017 01:32
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i would double my pay no, triple it
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Aug 30, 2017 01:33
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flerp posted:jack off
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Aug 30, 2017 01:35
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I'd kiss the rear end of my superiors, and KICK the rear end of my inferiors! Long story short, my bosshood would involve a lot of rear end.
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Aug 30, 2017 01:36
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reasonably priced sodas in the break room.
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Aug 30, 2017 01:38
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force unionisation
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Aug 30, 2017 01:38
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Sexually harass myself and just rake in the dough
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Aug 30, 2017 02:00
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Switch places with an employee once a week to let them be the boss
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Aug 30, 2017 02:04
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Nuke the great race space from orbit.
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Aug 30, 2017 02:19
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Promote myself to CEO to make more money.
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Aug 30, 2017 02:21
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| # ? Jun 6, 2024 07:06 |
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I would get TWO scoops of ice cream.
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Aug 30, 2017 02:22
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