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Hodack theatrically placed a hand up to shade his neanderthal like brow, though this was completely unnecessary having won the Sight of Eagles by defeating the arch wizard Haxor. "Tis Prepuce of Nonce!" exclaimed Hodack. "Lord Rivendack has recruited some of the most hated and dangerous enemies from my youth to thwart my revenge. This time things will go very differently than my last encounter with Prepuce, for I am a man now!" Timble bleated encouragingly to spur his master onward and upward, his enchanted horns deflecting and smashing any errant boulders. Hodack's pistoning quads and glutes made short work of the remaining climb. As they crested the crumbling edge of the calamitous cliff, Hodack spied his hated enemy waiting for him across a broad mesa. "What Ho foul miscreant!" Hodack's blood boiled with a mixture of rage and shame Prepuce cut a striking figure. The gem encrusted hilt of his broad sword poked through his heavy cape. His knightly helm was burnished to a glistening sheen. "At last Hodack, we meet again. I must say it has been far too long. I miss besting you in battle. Crushing you into submission was by far my most satisfying victory". Smiling coyly, Prepuce shed his cape with a flourish. The retracting cape revealed a golden armor that dazzled the eye, glittering in a mirrored brilliance. Surrounded by a bright corona, Prepuce's strategy was immediately clear. The rising sun was blindingly reflected into Hodack's eagle sighted eyes!! Prepuce unsheathed his mighty broad sword and gripped it with two gloved hands, prepared for the charge that was sure to come Weener Beater fucked around with this message at 23:05 on Nov 7, 2017 |
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Nov 3, 2017 17:24
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Hodack bellowed with anger. "This man is a lackey of the evil lord Rivendack! He and his fellow thugs terrorize the poor villagers below, and lay false claim to the throne!" Hodack punctuated his statements by stabbing the air with a bulbous muscled finger, while Timble chewed his cud and nodded his agreement. Prepuce snidely sniggered behind a gloved hand. Turning gallantly toward the mysteriously cloaked newcomer he pronounced, "Milady, this ruffian and his strange 4 legged concubine have wandered into our gentle kingdom seeking trouble. I know not of what he speaks. I am but a humble defender of the realm, a poor knight charged with defending our fair borders." Hodack was struck dumb. Prepuce's lies triggered a deeply buried memory. Of honeyed words and the yearnings of a young boy seeking the affirmation of a man of courage and valor. Betrayal!! Incoherent with rage, Hodack threw his mighty war-hammer directly at Prepuce's head!! With a ripple of strange energy, the woman's cloak opened, revealing a crimson lining. At the same time her hood drew back exposing a beautiful face framed with blazing red hair! Time froze for an instant. Her voluminous cloak stretched through the air, engulfing Hodack's massive hammer and wrestled it to the ground. "Hold!" exclaimed the mysterious beauty. "I will uncover the truth here!" Weener Beater fucked around with this message at 04:10 on Nov 4, 2017 |
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Nov 4, 2017 04:02
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Despite the rigid corset he was prone to wear, and gilded armor, Prepuce was quite nimble. His swinging broad sword sang a song of sorrow as he danced around the mesa seeking advantage. He continued to direct beams of brilliant sunlight into his foes eyes, probing for an opening to strike a decisive blow! Hodack and The Enchantress circled warily, parrying with hammer or deflecting with cape. Neither could penetrate the master swordsman's flurry of thrusts and swings. But fate favors heroes! As the battle wore on a lone cloud slid across the Sun's face, nullifying Prepuce's blinding glow. With a mighty roar Hodack swung maniacally. His mighty hammer drove Prepuce back, ever backward toward the mesa's edge. Through her powers of the Femmystic, an ancient long hidden source of arcane knowledge, The Enchantress sensed the confluence of probabilities and struck! Her living cape lashed out and grabbed Prepuce's leg, like an attacking clam, sending him toppling over the edge of the bluff! "Huzzah!" proclaimed Hodack. Timble pranced and bucked with joy at his master's victory. Weener Beater fucked around with this message at 01:35 on Nov 6, 2017 |
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Nov 6, 2017 00:16
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Timble chewed thoughtfully, pondering the challenge with all of the sagacity of a small framed ungulate. "Perhaps we could pass through as traveling merchants or a band of entertainers" he mused. The two human heroes turned with dumbfounded shock to peer at their companion. "Why that's brilliant!" exclaimed the Enchantress. Mumbling strange incantations in a long dead tongue the Enchantress cajoled her capricious cape into a flurry of folds. In no time she had transformed herself from a regal sorceress into a stooped merchant woman covered in a shawl and peasant dress. "Now what shall we do about you my hulking friend?" The Enchantress eyed Hodack's massive frame, and overdeveloped musculature. |
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Nov 6, 2017 01:46
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As they slunk towards the alleyway dozens of guards could be seen walking the battlements, or patrolling the parade grounds. Cowed townsfolk came and went down narrow streets leading off in several directions. Dominating the walled town was the keep itself, a massive imposing pile of red stone built against the mountainside and abutting the open commons. It was clear that entering the Citadel itself would be no small feet. The base of the keep was surrounded by a foul moat, brimming with the town's effluvia. A small bridge, guarded by soldiers led over the moat and into the castle. "We must find a place to hide until nightfall, a frontal assault is impossible." The Enchantress eyed the keep's massive face, noting few windows or hand holds. A series of a half submerged grated openings in the Castle's base emptied into the odorous moat. This looked promising.... Hodack lusted for action! "All this hiding and slinking around is for Sissies!" proclaimed the barbarian, popping his pecs for emphasis. Meanwhile...Timble followed his goatly instincts. His nostrils flared, picking up faint traces of jasmine, grass and delicious herbs in the air. Trotting up a narrow alley the goat came upon the high walled garden, used by the keep's cooks to supply Lord Rivendack's table. Timble trembled with hunger, his eye's wide as he peeked through a crack in the gate at the abundance he yearned to gorge on. How to get in? The high gate latched from the inside. A lone scullery maid gathered herbs and roots at the far side of the garden. As he watched, the maid plucked a cabbage and hid it under ruffled frock. Aha! Surely the cruel Lord Rivendack would not look kindly on employee theft! "Ho there maid! That is the thief's way of making sauerkraut! Open the gate or I shall report you to the Lord's Chamberlain! " The maid jumped up in fear. "Who is that?" she cried. "The Lord's guard. Open now and I shall forget your thievery." The maid quickly ran toward the gate, assorted vegetables dropping from her skirt. She unlatched and pulled open the gate, prepared to declare her innocence. But what was this? Only a lonely goat stood in the alley! Timble seized the moment. Nearly mad with hunger the goat galloped past the maid, quickly pivoted and rammed the poor girl in her ample backside, sending her sprawling into the street. He nudged the gate shut after her and prepared to satisfy his uncontrollable craving. Weener Beater fucked around with this message at 05:48 on Nov 7, 2017 |
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Nov 6, 2017 19:17
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The intrepid trio dashed around the kitchen frantically preparing Lord Rivendack's feast. Thankfully The Enchantress's education included 1 quarter of home ec. as an adjunct to philters and potions, while Timble's innate sense of all things vegetable rounded out their culinary arts. Hodack was content to tenderize a side of beef with his warhammer and practice his knife skills on the poultry. "What Ho!, this brisket vexes me!" Hodack continued to lustily swing his hammer, rippling chest glistening with sweat in the swampy air. The Enchantress's damp cape gave a slight flutter as she tried to focus on the soup and and sauces before her, rather than her manly compatriot. Timble sidled up to to TE and whispered " The medicinal stores are right across the hall from the kitchen. I have all of the ingredients we need. Broom flower, Bearberry, Guar Gum, Milk Thistle, Senna, and Vasambu" The two set to work. Bored with meat pounding, Hodack wandered over. "Ho good friends, why this meal smells fit for a king!" He gamely grabbed a spoon to sample the soup. Before TE or Timble could stop him he had swallowed a goodly helping. "Why Lord Rivendack hardly deserves such fare!" Stunned, Timble and the Enchantress had no time to address the likely outcome of their friend's folly. They pushed him toward the server station. "Quickly Hodack, the time is nigh. We must disguise ourselves so that we may bring the meal to Lord Rivendack" TE struggled to squeeze Hodack into the server uniform. His gargantuan traps and lats strained the largest jacket, and no pants would accommodate his trunk like legs. An apron would have to do. The Enchantress quickly coaxed her cloak into suitable attire. Hodack tugged at the apron. "No man shall wear a skirt! I am no prancing ninny." Timble nudged his master. "This is but a blood apron. It shall keep your foes unworthy entrails from sullying your new loin cloth." Hodack appeared mollified, but he crossed his arms sullenly. "I did not come here to cook, I came to liberate!" His proclamation was punctuated by a deep rumbling centered in his stomach. TE and Timble exchanged a worried look and hurried to load the serving carts with the various dishes. Lastly they stowed Hodack's hammer just as the head servant called for dinner to begin........ Weener Beater fucked around with this message at 03:51 on Nov 8, 2017 |
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Nov 7, 2017 22:43
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