Who should win the first primary? This poll is closed. |
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Glark Stoben | 2 | 7.41% | |
Horrostein's Monster | 12 | 44.44% | |
Tryx Goblok | 6 | 22.22% | |
Syndra Grassgly | 7 | 25.93% | |
Total: | 27 votes |
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Welcome to Fan'Tasy Relm! Fan'Tasy Relm is an extremely original and creative world filled with made-up races, including Goblins, Dryads, Dusk Elves, Undead, and Gorcs. Unfortunately, due to their post-imperial society requiring that their people don't revolt under terrible labor conditions, they've made the enormous mistake of trusting their folk in electing their represntatives. That's right, they live in a democracy! Well, what does that mean? It means they have to determine the fate of their horrible, rotten country by picking some sort of loving idiot, that's what. Oh wait, they can't. Uhh, something went wrong. See, they hosed up and accidentally created an oligarchy. That means you, the rich masterminds behind this fantastic fantasy Fan'Tasy Relm get to choose their elected representatives for them! gently caress. So here's the deal. There's a two party system and a general election. Due to some sort of lovely mishap, only one party can elect a person at a time. Here are the candidates: Glark Stoben Known wiz-bro. Survives only on a diet of the blood of youth (not vampiristic) and diet energy drinks. The world's first billionaire (extremely vampiristic) Gorc. Horrostein's Monster Believes in brains-for-all. Skin drier than the Sor'Aha Desert. Due to resurrection laws, is only considered not-living by mere technicality. Extremely undead. Tryx Goblok Goblin-esque, but actually just a normal person with a hosed up disease called Sociopathy. Already has the Goblin vote on lock. Extremely hip with goblin memes. Not a goblin. Syndra Grassgly Just your average run-of-the-mill working class Dryad with a social sciences degree and nature deity for a wife. Scowls around small children. Can't locate Tyrin'Stol on the world map. --- Okay, that's cool, but uhh. How will you determine who is the best person to vote for? Well, you could vote blindly like a complete idiot, OR you could ask a question about a candidate. Unfortunately, the average voter, depicted here: Will respond. Ask away! Vote! Try and sway the electorate! I don't care! anime was right has issued a correction as of 03:55 on Nov 7, 2017 |
# ? Nov 7, 2017 03:30 |
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# ? May 6, 2024 07:11 |
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also i hosed up the tag gently caress me
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# ? Nov 7, 2017 03:31 |
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Is Tryx Goblok a Goblin?
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# ? Nov 7, 2017 03:36 |
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What are the candidates views on the influx of elven refugees caused by their forest burning down, an even which totally doesnt involve our government
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# ? Nov 7, 2017 03:39 |
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I vote for Horrostein's Monster because gently caress you that's clearly reanimated BERNIE!!!!
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# ? Nov 7, 2017 03:40 |
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NecroMonster posted:Is Tryx Goblok a Goblin? He says he isn't, but I'm pretty sure he's a goblin. \ Agean90 posted:What are the candidates views on the influx of elven refugees caused by their forest burning down, an even which totally doesnt involve our government Not racist enough for me. \
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# ? Nov 7, 2017 03:41 |
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If you sneeze and fart at the same time, will you die?
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# ? Nov 7, 2017 03:43 |
Question for all the candidates: what is are your stances on student loan forgiveness, the equal rights amendment, and ghosts?
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# ? Nov 7, 2017 03:45 |
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I have a question that I'd like to hear all the candidates answer, are Kobolds lizard people or dog people?
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# ? Nov 7, 2017 03:48 |
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RandomPauI posted:Question for all the candidates: what is are your stances on student loan forgiveness, the equal rights amendment, and ghosts? Goblok says he will forgive the student loans of all goblins, all goblins are created equal, and only goblins can be ghosts. Grassgly scowled at me but promised that she would forgive all the student loans I, the average voter, do not have. Horrostein's monster drooled incoherently before saying something about taking gold from all of the dragons. Stoben merely said 'gently caress you'. I haven't seen him since. \ Guy Goodbody posted:I have a question that I'd like to hear all the candidates answer, are Kobolds lizard people or dog people? Goblok said goblin. Grassgly said dog. Horrostein's said dog. Stoben said lizard. I say they should go back to where they came from!! \
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# ? Nov 7, 2017 03:51 |
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How can I be sure Glark Stoben isn't going to abduct and drain all the blood from MY kids? I'm just a working class peasant and I need those kids to tend goats, reap, etc.
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# ? Nov 7, 2017 03:52 |
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orb truther posted:How can I be sure Glark Stoben isn't going to abduct and drain all the blood from MY kids? Well, he's a billionaire, which makes him a lot smarter than me. I think he'll figure it out. \
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# ? Nov 7, 2017 03:54 |
I already mail-in voted for Grassgly but I'm thinking of changing my vote. What are your stances on voters being allowed to change their votes on election day?
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# ? Nov 7, 2017 03:56 |
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im liking this goblin guy, who, technically does not exist, therefore making him the best candidate
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# ? Nov 7, 2017 04:02 |
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Oh so there's no Dusk Elvish candidates huh? That's how we are doing it.
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# ? Nov 7, 2017 04:08 |
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Plutonis posted:Oh so there's no Dusk Elvish candidates huh? That's how we are doing it. there's four more candidates in the next primary, hold your unicorns
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# ? Nov 7, 2017 04:09 |
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anime was right posted:also i hosed up the tag gently caress me what tag do you want
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# ? Nov 7, 2017 04:17 |
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Is brains-for-all some kind of education program
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# ? Nov 7, 2017 04:17 |
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logikv9 posted:what tag do you want
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# ? Nov 7, 2017 04:19 |
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which candidate is Jeb?
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# ? Nov 7, 2017 04:20 |
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Concordat posted:Is brains-for-all some kind of education program I don't know, but it sounds elitist! \
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# ? Nov 7, 2017 04:20 |
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logikv9 posted:which candidate is Jeb? next primary
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# ? Nov 7, 2017 04:21 |
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NecroMonster posted:Is Tryx Goblok a Goblin? Problematic for you to assume that. He's an ethnic gremlin
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# ? Nov 7, 2017 04:32 |
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so i have to choose between Mark Cuban if he was out of the blood closet, zombie Bernie, Ted Ooze and Carly Faeorina/Jill Vine? Agean90 posted:What are the candidates views on the influx of elven refugees caused by their forest burning down, an even which totally doesnt involve our government Mage Tower 7 wasn't even in the blast radius of those two griffons with the sacks of combustion potions, so why does no one care that it also collapsed on Sept Ember 11th The elves can't have done it, is what I'm saying, and it definitely wasn't the dusk elves that we raided afterwards, the same dusk elves that are largely law abiding refugees, good people who run our item shops and stock our granaries. So who is really to blame? What do the candidates think
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# ? Nov 7, 2017 04:37 |
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Oiled and Ready posted:so i have to choose between Mark Cuban if he was out of the blood closet, zombie Bernie, Ted Ooze and Carly Faeorina/Jill Vine? I don't know what you're talking about. This is Fan'Tasy Relm. None of those are real or even fictional people.
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# ? Nov 7, 2017 04:52 |
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ij your opinion which of the candidates is the sexiest?
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# ? Nov 7, 2017 05:12 |
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i need to know the candidate's positions on necromancy. inherently evil, or just a good way to use old bones?
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# ? Nov 7, 2017 05:19 |
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Prav posted:i need to know the candidate's positions on necromancy. inherently evil, or just a good way to use old bones? Well that Goblok fellow is fine with it, but the life panel should only be comprised of goblins. Grassgly thinks it's evil. Horrostein's grumbled incoherently, when I asked. Stoben? Stoben says there's just not enough good blood out there. Good. Very good. \ NecroMonster posted:ij your opinion which of the candidates is the sexiest? The one with the hottest cans. Horrostein's Monster. \
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# ? Nov 7, 2017 05:22 |
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why should we trust Syndra Grassgly's "sciences" over good old-fashioned haruspicy and divination?
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# ? Nov 7, 2017 05:24 |
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Satan y/n?
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# ? Nov 7, 2017 05:26 |
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anime was right posted:I don't know what you're talking about. This is Fan'Tasy Relm. None of those are real or even fictional people. classic misdirection, hmm i wonder why nobody wants to talk about the fact that high elves, our close allies, definitely blew up the mage towers and put a hole in the fkn citadel
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# ? Nov 7, 2017 05:36 |
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how does Glark Stoben square our right to bear arms with the transmutation guild's recent restrictions on shape-changing rituals?
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# ? Nov 7, 2017 05:53 |
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What's the importance of Tyrin'Stol anyway?
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# ? Nov 7, 2017 05:56 |
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which candidate would you most like to be cucked by? Which candidate would you most like to cuck?
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# ? Nov 7, 2017 06:15 |
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im with Syndra Grassgly
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# ? Nov 7, 2017 06:27 |
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So uh, if it's "Horrostein's Monster", who's Horrostein? To what mysterious entity does our workers' rights candidate owe true fealty?
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# ? Nov 7, 2017 06:40 |
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Seconded; I want to know the monster who is behind Horrostein's Monster, as it seems we're voting for his brand of politics rather than his shambling abomination's!!
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# ? Nov 7, 2017 06:50 |
NecroMonster posted:Satan y/n? always
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# ? Nov 7, 2017 06:53 |
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Horrostein's Monster used to be pro-life, but after a change of heart he's now pro-choice. how will the candidate ensure that his platform stays consistent after any future organ replacements?
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# ? Nov 7, 2017 06:58 |
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# ? May 6, 2024 07:11 |
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Is there a type of magic that the candidates favor or admire? Similarly, what types of magic do the candidates wish to see eliminated or restricted?
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# ? Nov 7, 2017 07:26 |