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Dec 20, 2017 07:15
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"There is NO Dream Too extreme!" —Chris Robinson, writing on the front page of my copy of this book quote:Chris Robinson is an aspiring filmmaker, and accomplished actor, author and songwriter, who grew up in the world of George Lucas, Steven Spielberg, Marvel Comics, John Wayne and church. However, it is this wonderful diverse world, which propelled Chris to write this sweeping epic. Chris Robinson is an interesting man with some interesting ideas. War of the Archangels is not his first book (whose cover shares a bizarre attribute with this book's, if you look for it), but it might as well be - before, he had written mainly to entertain, but here he is gripped by inescapable purpose, a drive that renders any previous work irrelevant and insignificant. This is a book that exists to enlighten the world with Chris Robinson's strange take on Christian cosmology, an explication of the workings and history of realms beyond our own. He is here to teach, if you will only listen. Appropriately, given the task that he has taken on in writing his book and its significance to him, Robinson begins with a brief introduction laying out the theories and inspirations that brought him to this point, titled "Knowledge Quest: The Author's Introduction". He starts with a trite and long-winded picture of society's spiritual thirst and confusion before getting to the heart of his aims: Page x posted:For centuries these questions have been simmering in the hearts of mankind, but as of late, that simmer has become a boiling pot, with billions of people demanding the answers. I guess this is why I wrote this book to give the reader a behind the scenes look at what was happening from God's perspective. I wanted to go back, way back to the earliest ages ... but what were the earliest ages? Unsurprisingly, Robinson finds his answers in the book of Genesis. Surprisingly, he is not a young-Earth Creationist: Page x posted:Now there are some good Christian people, who are very sincere in their belief that the Earth is only 10,000 years old, and that humans lived at the same time as the dinosaurs, and Paleolithic men, such as the Neanderthal man, are a myth. I am truly sorry to disagree, but I just don't get that line of thinking? According to Paleontologist, (People way smarter than me in this area) dinosaurs walked this planet by the tens of thousands, in herds as mighty as the buffalo of the old West. And these beasts were ferocious killing machines ... the Steven Spielberg movie, Jurassic Park is spot on! I am afraid that we humans would have been an after lunch and before dinner snack for almost any living creature of that time. No, what Robinson proposes is decidedly different, hinging on Genesis 1:1-2: Page xi posted:The word formless and or empty in the Hebrew language is tohu, which is a VERB that means "Lays To Waste." Whoa! That changes everything about this passage. So it should read ... "In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth, and the earth was laid to waste!" And here Robinson embarks on a logical journey that will take us to a very odd place once the story begins. The pages he spends on his argument can be summarized very briefly: the book of Revelation describes Heaven and spirits in physical terms, and thus they have their own physical substance and space. In short, they occupy physical dimensions: Page xiv posted:Physicists have proven that extra dimensions, and the ability to tunnel into them really do exist. It's been proven that there are eleven dimensions, most of which we cannot yet traverse. By accessing the wormholes embedded in the space-time continuum one is able to move from universe to universe with ease, that is if you are an Angel made of spirit substance. How does he know that angels (or Angels) can do this? Such an appearance was a profound influence on the writing of this very book: Page xv posted:One night while sleeping I felt as if someone had called my name and I began to float out of my bed. I think it was more of a vision, but at the same time I was not sure. I went through an opening, which was located at the end of my bed and was suddenly inside a new dimension. The sky, if that's what it was, was cobalt blue and the light was an astonishing peach, and there were billowing clouds of crimson smoke. Standing before me was an Angel, who stood some 15 feet tall and he wasn't playing games. He wore some kind of tunic type of out fit, kind of like Luke in Star Wars, he had blonde hair and his eyes were as flaming cut diamonds. He glowed from the inside out, much like a night light, but it was a surging raging kind of light, but not brilliant, meaning he did not radiate causing me to go blind. I was not sure what was happening ... at first I thought I'd eaten too many fries and burgers and had a heart attack and I was on my way out. Then I thought I was having a Paul type experience, either way I asked the Angel a question. "Are you taking me to Heaven? Excuse me, are you taking me to Heaven?" He did not respond, but I did notice he had his hand on the hilt of a mighty big sword and seemed fixated upon something, something "out there". Then I heard a voice say, "The writing of your book as brought you undesired attention, and he is here to protect you." BAM, I was back in my bed. After this intriguing episode, Robinson moves on to the topic of distinguishing angels from demons. Angels, he argues, retain their physical bodies in the spiritual world, but demons have been cast out of theirs. This is why angels can appear as themselves on Earth but demons must possess hosts. Following a brief digression about Nephilim and the book of Enoch (according to Robinson's reading of Enoch, the "fallen, totally corrupt, evil DNA" of fallen angels, not yet bodiless demons, combined with human DNA to "create one ugly mess" in the Nephilim) and a plug for his website warofthearchangels.com (now gone and sadly absent from the Wayback's archives), he wraps up with a description of Satan's evil - he's really bad, you guys, so bad that "he'd make Hitler look like your Aunt May" - and concludes his introduction with these heartening words: Page xx posted:This book takes much of what I have learned and adds the impartation from God's mouth to my brain. It's what I call "Plausible Fiction", meaning the story is plausible, but it is a story. So get yourself a cup of coffee, or a glass of ice tea, or head to your local coffee house and get lost in the War Of The Archangels ... Sham bam bamina! fucked around with this message at 05:17 on Dec 21, 2017 |
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Dec 20, 2017 08:42
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After the introduction is a "preface" whose pages have Roman numerals like the introduction, but it comes after the title page and is part of the novel's narrative, so I don't know why Robinson didn't just make it the first chapter. After a brief paragraph of scene-setting, the preface gets down to business and describes the, uh, governance of the spiritual world: Page xxiii posted:The sons of God were the practitioners of scientific wisdom, the curators of creation, building civilizations on terrestrial planets all under the Galactic Empire known as the United Federation of Kingdom Nations. The keepers of ancient creation, the rulers of the multiple universes were the Seven Kings Of Wisdom, whose job it was to impart the secrets of design to the Archangels at the Academy of Delphia. Each planet was ruled over by a Senate, the Archangel of that system assuming the role of the Supreme Chancellor. The Supreme Chancellor would appoint a Secretary General to one of the four Counsels of Law and Justice: The Counsel of Corinth, the Counsel of Draco, the Counsel of Lyra, and the Counsel of Orion, who in turn would report to the Supreme Counsel of Cherub Elders, who would report to the Absolute Trinity. See, if the spaceships on the cover didn't tip you off, the physical dimensions of spiritual space mean that these spiritual beings rely on physical technology, and given their eons of advancement compared to humanity, this means that we're in for some full-bore science fiction. And if Robinson's persistence in using "counsel" in place of "council" bothers you, this is going to be rough going; his righting has quite the pension for malapropisms. At least he doesn't confuse "capital" and "capitol" like Suzanne Collins. The preface picks up quickly, though, with a genuinely fascinating account of Creation. I will give Robinson this much credit: no matter how crazy the things he imagines get, and no matter how sloppily he writes them down, he definitely gets you to see them. This is the most vividly written awful book I've read since Dragons: Lexicon Triumvirate, with the additional benefit of being filtered through Chris Robinson's wide-eyed glee instead of Kenneth Eng's condescending self-importance. Before I get to Creation, though, I want to take a brief look at the preparations for this process: Page xxv posted:The Angels enter through the door of enlightenment, symbolized by two shimmering pillars of burnished gold and kiss the pulsating Sword of the Kingdom Nations, the Sword Of Yeshua.  Enough of that. There's a supernaturally grandiose procession - whose transcription I'll limit to the phrase "Lucifer swaggered out in front, while Michael, Uriel, Gabriel, and Raphael marched right behind him" - toward "the Lord of Host" at the heart of Heaven: Page xxvi posted:Within the mathematically arranged metropolis resided a Temple Pyramid so enormous and geometrically perfect that the mere gaze upon the structure produced feelings of fright and tingling flashes of joy. Angels bowed in awe as enormous arcs of magnificent light burst high in the sky surrounding the Thrones, which seemed to hover above the apex of gold, supported by lightening and a power surging mist. The Absolute, the Word, and raging Spirit of Living fire sat upon these most astounding thrones. Gargantuan pillars of white light burned with fury from the eyes of the Father, as he over looked the complex maze of tens of thousands of towering buildings. After about a page's worth of further description, we finally reach the scene's destination, the Big Bang: Pages xxvii-xxix posted:"Let There Be Light." Once the Earth itself comes into being, Robinson's Creation account becomes a significantly less entertaining lecture on the anthropic principle, but even that doesn't detract from the infectious rush of this cosmic event (of which I've transcribed about half). If the average sci-fi author believed even half as much in what they wrote as Robinson does, the genre would be a much more interesting realm. (On the other hand, they might just end up writing Battlefield Earth, so never mind.) But, of course, this is the story of a war, and every story needs an inciting incident: Pages xxx-xxxi posted:Lucifer, the chief Archangel of the Supreme Counsel of Cherub Elders, became obsessed with himself, enchanted at his own voice, enamored by his own beauty, drunk by his own power, lusting after the adoration given unto the Trinity. The shroud of pride fell upon Lucifer, as did the hatred for the future plans. God had to make a creation called man, who would be infused with the Trinity's Divine DNA, making them true sons of God. Lucifer's heart became bitterly black, a sullen wasteland of wicked sin, causing his very molecular structure to become infused with sulfur bacterium, which began to eat at his actual being. Rumors and smear campaigns were unleashed upon key members of Heaven, as back room deals, done in the shadow of lies cancer, propelled Lucifer into the realm of being thought of as an Emperor. This strife led to political lectures, demonstrations, walkouts, and Anti-Yeshua Rallies. Uneasiness swept across the Kingdom as Angles by the billions defected from the ranks of the United Federation of Kingdom Nations and joined Lucifer's cause. [...] Lucifer became a mighty hunter before the LORD, with a ruthlessness lust for power. These passages, aside from the bewildering shifts in their narrative distance and the tone of their imagery ("Anti-Yeshua Rallies"?), illustrate the single most baffling aspect of this book to me: What unearthly word processor is Robinson using? When "Angles by the billions" defect and Lucifer gains a "ruthlessness lust for power", it seems that Robinson let his spell checker correct every word he typed without oversight. But the book's swarms of proper nouns can't possibly all be in the spell checker's dictionary, so that means that he had to manually approve or discard its emendations. And how is it that Lucifer "succeeded" from the Federation while his Alliance "seceded" in the same sentence? I have never seen such inexplicable patternlessness of error in any other text. Whatever the cause of his technical lapses, Robinson at least knows enough about writing to end his preface on description instead of exposition: Page xxxi posted:With their sin the Angelic armies that stood against God were given new names and identities. The very nature of sin corrupted their DNA and the rebellious Angels from the lead Counsel of Draco were turned into Draco-Reptilians known as Draconians. The Draconians lost their Angelic looks and were turned into hideous Red Dragons. They became shape-shifters and resided on the now poisoned planet Rahab. Lucifer himself was turned into a repulsive, shape-shifting Serpentine-Dragon, who's name was now Satan. He was transformed from being the most beautiful Angel of all to a lizard like dark scaly skinned sorcerer, a dark god, who wore a black hooded robe to hide his intent. He was the most malevolent, depraved being in all of creation, pure evil, pure ungodliness, and pure wickedness. He breathed rage and bled hate, his thoughts were decadent and his lust for blood relentless, his abhorrence for God was endless and he burned with fury for total revenge. The lesser Angels from the Counsel of Orion were transformed into small hairless creatures with huge egg shaped heads, known as Grey's, and the Sebeth Order from the Counsel of Lyra, were turned into humanoid sea monsters. Sham bam bamina! fucked around with this message at 00:00 on Dec 22, 2017 |
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Dec 21, 2017 07:12
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chitoryu12 posted:Yes please provide accurate literary criticism to my joke about a crazy person’s religious sci-fi book.
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Dec 22, 2017 01:27
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Welp, Firefox crashed and took my FINISHED post with it. Sham bam bamina! fucked around with this message at 04:04 on Dec 22, 2017 |
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Dec 22, 2017 03:28
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Shush, shush! It's story time!
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Dec 22, 2017 05:18
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At long last, we finally reach... Chapter 1.Page 1 posted:Before the ages of time in the Kingdom Nations of God, there was war ... I'm at a loss as to how a war across galaxies begins with a beach landing, but I'll actually give Robinson the benefit of the doubt with "West of the Panzerail Galaxy" - it isn't hard to imagine the holy capital in the preface as the reference point for cardinal directions in space. Then again, while I don't know yet if these cardinal directions include "up" and "down", I somehow doubt that Robinson has thought that far in imagining this world. And, as the "Tusken" beaches and deepening references to space politics hint, what he has imagined isn't entirely his own anyway... But we have more pressing concerns, like the establishment of principal characters: Page 1 posted:On the Galactic Station, Icon XII Raphael, a member of the famed Guardian Knights, keeps watch over the Imperial Palace of Jandella. He gazes out the bay window with Rush, an indigo Eagle sitting on his shoulder and Shebam, a pure white panther by his side, which he strokes gently. Raphael beholds the beauty of the blue planet as Transport Ships come and go in an apparent endless stream of activity. He quietly longs for a return of Rahab, the heart of the Angelic civilization. However, the seat of the rebellion is now centered there. Raphael ties his formidable sword of crystallite fire around his robe sash and turns to find Anton standing in front of him.  Anton is one of the "Courier's", who have bodies of "crystal gold" and "are among the few Angles that actually have biological wings". He's come because he has "sensed [...] some kind of distress", which Raphael confirms: Page 2 posted:"I can't pinpoint any one concentration of evil among the Council, yet the darkness is strong there. It's maddening." Yeah, no prizes for guessing Chris Robinson's favorite movie franchise. The conversation quickly digresses into a murky expostulation on the Trinity and Raphael's destiny before "alarms and buzzards" mercifully interrupt. Anticipating "excitement of some sort", Anton and Raphael "run and glare fiercely out the huge bay window" before enacting this scene: Page 3 posted:Through a bio-electro-telepathic implant Raphael projects a crystal holographic projection grid from his open hand, which connects him to the bridge. "Royal Shield to the Bridge." While the station is readying its "Mercury Guns", the enemy's opening barrage momentarily shuts the power down with an explosion. Raphael and Anton take to their "Esoteric fighters" alongside their fellow Guardian Knights to do battle with the attacking "Venom fighters": Page 4 posted:Raphael closes in on the Venom fighters with tremendous mind numbing speeds and without hesitation it's on. Unfortunately, this military assault is a distraction from the machinations of the "Ascended Masters" on Jandella. I realize that this next excerpt will probably feel staid after that riveting action, but I just love how hard Robinson commits to a stupid, stupid idea here: Pages 4-5 posted:Far from the battle, on the planets surface, Bal Ram Pompe sits with the Ascended Masters at the round table of law; they are Virgo, who's name means, 'Promised Seed': Libra, who's name means, 'The Redeemers Atoning Work': Scorpio, who's name means, 'The Redeemers Conflict': Sagittarius, who's name means, 'The Redeemers Triumph': Capricorns, who's name means, 'The Redeemers Suffering': Aquarius, who's name means, 'The Blessing Assured': Pisces, who's name means, 'Blessing In Abeyance': Aries, who's name means, 'Blessings Consummated': Taurus, who's name means, 'Messiahs Coming Rule': Gemini, who's name means, 'Messiah As Prince Of Princes': Cancer, who's name means, 'Messiahs Redeemed Possessions': and Leo, who's name means, 'The Prophecy Of Triumph Fulfilled'. You thought you knew the signs of the zodiac, but you thought wrong! Anyway, the Ascended Masters are on Jandella to win Bal Ram Pompe over to Satan's cause. They spend a full page or so telling Pompe that God fears Satan's power and that this power can make Pompe a god himself. Pompe doesn't even make a token objection: Page 6 posted:Pompe sits back in his ivory throne, gazing at his Senate Ring and the six inch purple sash draped over his tunic. "I want total control ... I want Palatine at my side and be treated as the god I am." Pompe does have some practical concerns, though: Page 6 posted:"Blanor will not stand for this.... and if you touch him you will draw the wrath of Michael. And what of Jandella himself?" So while this Jedi's off in the Outer Rim, they're sending Zuckuss to help execute Order 66 and... ugh, it's so blatant at this point! Meanwhile, the tide of battle is turning for the worse: Page 6 posted:Far above Jandella, Majestic Fire finds themselves overwhelmed by the Aquarian Cruisers and Venom fighters. Raphael turns back to Icon XII to fight the boarding party. Once in the landing bay, he "vaults from his fighter", because we're cribbing specific shots from Star Wars now. He meets up with Anton, and they charge into the fray. Here, Robinson throws a curveball by briefly making Raphael an anime character: Page 7 posted:Raphael opens his palm and unleashes an inferno by discharging an atomic wave blast, which instantly dematerializes anything it touches. Raphael and Anton are "penned down" temporarily by "nitro laser fire", but they manage to escape and "take out the computer exchanges and detonate every Thermo Nuclear fuel storage depot" rather than letting the station fall into enemy hands. Before long, they run into... oh, who am I kidding? He's a Sith, albeit armed with the Highlander's sword instead of a lightsaber: Page 8 posted:Zendark, a most formidable foe and former Guardian Knight meets them. [...] Anton jumps in front of Zendark, but is thwacked aside like he's nothing. Raphael pulls out his sword of fire and clashes with Zendark's sword causing an electrical blast of power that sends a shower of electrically charged sparks everywhere. Zendark punctuates his feelings with repeated slams of his sword and sidekicks, until Raphael sags and falls unconscious. Darth Vader then boards the station: Page 8 posted:Suddenly the main blast doors blow open and the Imperialist forces enter, shooting any and all United Federation personnel of God that make a move upon them. Then through the smoke enters General Jupiter wearing his Satanic Empire uniform, a black suit of armor with a red sash draped over his left shoulder that has the satanic insignia embroidered on it. And that's Chapter 1. If you think that ripping off Star Wars is a boring way for a book to be bad, don't worry, because Chapter 2 is going to be a whole new kind of silly. Sham bam bamina! fucked around with this message at 07:05 on Dec 22, 2017 |
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Dec 22, 2017 05:18
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Chapter 2, part the firstPage 9 posted:In the ages of antiquity past, magnificent Kingdoms rose from the lush terrain of the garden planet called Earth, only to align themselves with Satan, and disappear in total destruction. Five ages have existed on Earth before this sixth one. From the first Kingdom of enchanted creatures such as trolls, elves, dwarfs and gnomes, to the second kingdom of the Angels, which became corrupt and were given over to massive lizards, to the subsequent Kingdoms, where Humanoids ruled as Kings and co-mingled with the fallen Sons Of God. This sounds a lot like Theosophy, which is a pretty impressive left turn to take at this point. I'm surprised that Madame Blavatsky isn't in the book's dedication, although it's possible that Robinson just picked up this idea secondhand from one of the zillion people who are. The Guardian Knight Steven is riding his pegasus, Cherub, to "the Sixth Sector" of "the North Valley" - we're apparently on Earth, but don't ask me where. Pages 9-10 posted:Mammoth plant eating dinosaurs fill the valley. From Brachiosaurus, who towers over the tress, to Argentinasaurus, who is twice the size of the Brachiosaurus, to Triceratops and Pleurocoelus ... herds of dinosaurs of all kinds roam to and fro, eating and interacting with each other in some kind of Jurassic style neighborhood. Steven isn't going to Andoria, though. He and Cherub touch down in the forest, but it isn't long before a mysterious voice telling them to "Take Heed" stops them in their tracks. Steven "tries to contain the pined up restless energy, which lay's beneath his calm exterior", and he and Cherub continue to a pool of water, where a shadow passes overhead while Cherub is drinking. "We must go Master Steven," Cherub helpfully tells the Guardian Knight. (Cherub is a talking pegasus.) Pages 10-11 posted:Steven rides on, but is so ever burdened by the heavy silence ... a thick mist has settled down around him, which drives his thoughts to the countless rumors that the rebellion has entered Earth itself. Steven wonders to himself if the humanoids will stay loyal to God. Then there is the city of EnSidious, which sits beyond the Towers of Nefarious in the land of Vegan. The unsettling rumor is that the dark gods reside there now, ruled by Lord Iniquitous and his Dark Wizard, Melagate. If all this is true, then the rebellion has just taken another twist. I refuse to comment. The shadowy creature that's been following Steven chooses this moment to attack. Robinson mentions in passing that it's a "one time Cherub", which means that we have a pegasus named Cherub and actual cherubs in the same story. After a brief struggle, the two separate and face each other down: Page 11 posted:Standing before him is a monstrous eight-foot tall beast, who has a dragons body, the face of an Angel, long black hair, like that of a lion's main, teeth of a tiger, the tail of a scorpion, including a 14 inch spike of fire protruding at the end, not to mention powerful scale covered wings. Dur~Kran (note that no part of this "Reptilian-Insectoid" is actually likened to an insect) maintains that he is a god and that Steven can become one too if he joins "the Rebellion of Black Evil" under Satan. But Steven refuses, and they return to fighting: Page 11 posted:The furious conquer attacks like a frenzied storm of madness, pounding the smaller Angel all over the place. However, before he can strike, Dur~Kran is stopped by Michael, who has swooped in on his own winged horse, Sapphire: Page 12 posted:"Michael!" Dur~Kran and Michael argue for a bit, a conversation where Michael literally says, "I sense much fear in you," then fight. It's a pretty great fight, but I can't transcribe everything here. (If you really want to read it, buy the frickin' book, which I think goes without saying by now anyway.) No, we have more important things to cover: Pages 12-13 posted:From nowhere the heavy mist, which has settled in the area, begins to take form. From out of the murkiness a slithering shadow materializes and speaks in a repulsive tongue. There's more fighting. Michael eventually stops the beast and the bounty hunter by going Super Saiyan: Page 13 posted:Michael turns back to the creature and Dur~Kran, but has endured enough. Michael stands tall, his muscular body grows larger, his face becomes as a ridged cut diamond. A molecular transformation begins to take place within the Archangel, as his body turns into flaming crystallite, his face as lightning, his eyes swirl as a nuclear sun, his arms and legs like blazing lasers, his chest as a whirlwind of majestic power, and his voice is as the sea. I... I need a break. Chapter 2 will conclude next time. Sham bam bamina! fucked around with this message at 05:59 on Dec 25, 2017 |
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Dec 23, 2017 09:30
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Chapter 2, part the secondPage 13 posted:Across the black abyss in the Mystic Sea on the Angelic planet Rahab, concealed by the cloak of secret shadows, sits Babylon. This city of erotic evil is the center of Satan's rebellion.  Rahab orbits between Mars and Jupiter, and it used to be "the very seat of worship in the star system" before Satan conquered it. Now, he controls it from "the Aquarian Pyramid", which is built from "massive sulfuric armored blocks" and guarded by "death towers" at its four corners. Within it is "the Temple of Mysticism", where "Darken Vampirism is practiced in the shadows of secrecy". All righty. Page 14 posted:The inner depth of the temple houses the Chamber of Darkness, this stygian black metallic room is where the Divine Masters sit. Encircling the table is the Octagon Altar of Wickedness, and sitting around the table are the Fallen Masters: Ra, Apollo, Jupiter, Dark Siege, Baal, Zeus, Incubus, Balberith, known as the bear, and the most vile and feared Angel other than Satan himself, the Angel of Death, Abaddon the Destroyer. Satan has appeared before this motley crew to give them a lengthy pep talk, but I'll just quote the good part: Page 15 posted:"Seize the darkness, take it in hand for THERE IS ONLY ONE GOD IN YOU, THAT IS THE LORD OF DESTRUCTION, SATAN, SO LET THE ANNIHILATION BEGIN!" Hell yeah! Zeus informs Satan that their minions have sent "the Oracles of Knowledge and the Sacred Scroll of Light" to Lord Iniquitous in the Kingdom of EnSidious - which, let's not forget, is in the land of Vegan. The good guys, naturally, are elsewhere: Page 15 posted:Just one planet from Satan's throne, sits the planet Mars, which houses the Covering Cherub and seat of all who worship unto Jehovah. Of course they're based in Cydonia. Of course they're responsible for both the "face" and "pyramids" there. Of course Robinson spends a page and a half marveling at this BS. Michael and Steven arrive in Michael's "transport fighter" (???) to investigate the disappearance of the Oracles and the Scroll, which turns out to very anachronistically be the Torah. (Or is the anachronism the point?) Gabriel is waiting for them, and he and Michael have a little moment: Page 17 posted:The Angels stand to attention as Gabriel and Michael, who are the best of friends, acknowledge each other. Michael respects Gabriel's unwavering integrity and boundless knowledge of the system of God. Gabriel loves Michael's brash inferno like zeal in defending Gods Kingdom, and feels just a little more at ease when he's around. I guess we know who wears the pants here. They join the angels Neptune and Mars for a briefing. Satan's forces are overwhelming and imprisoning Guardian Knights across the galaxies, including Raphael and Anton from the previous chapter. They'll have to wait a bit, since Michael is going to rescue Blanor first, a character who was barely mentioned in passing by one of the fallen zodiac angels. Robinson's is a tightly spun tale. Gabriel pulls up a hologram of the pyramid from the book's cover, which has the Oracles of Knowledge inscribed on it (about a Tumblr post's worth of text, going by the artwork): Page 17 posted:"The Oracles of Knowledge as a whole create The Matrix Code Of Existence, which indicate: Revelation by God's own Word, the Word itself being alive. The Oracles Of Knowledge materialize from the Word, Yeshua. These codes include: The Faith Codes, which deal with the substance of things: The DNA Codes, which deal with the genetic make up of biological life: The Prophetic Codes, which deal with points in time, action seen by God, but not by the Angel: And the Creation Codes, which deal with Quantum Physics and formulas that make up the dimensions and universal matter." Given that the text on the pyramid is Hebrew and that the dedication's Chuck Missler appears to be into Bible codes (his website was mentioned, so I gave it a look; it's the boring kind of loopy), I'm going to guess that these codes are Bible codes. I guess the Mars face wasn't already stupid enough. The angel Mars explains that DNA is also a code and projects some more holographic illustrations. The final one is "an extensive cylinder encoded with numeral matrixes and letters": Page 18 posted:"This cylinder or tunnel is the dimension of time, a concept new to us, but the expansive universe of terrestrial terrain resides within this dimension. Our parallel universe resides just beyond the mystic sea, trillions upon trillions of light years away. But embedded within the walls of time are Celestial gateways, in which we can vortex in and out instantaneously. God has used this system to place himself into that realm via His Word." Don't bother trying to understand. You can't. I've tried. In the end, it turns out that for Satan to create life of his own, he needs the Bible codes to work out the "key" to the code of DNA, which I don't quite believe works that way. The angels split up to search the galaxies and bring the codes back. Edit: Since that's not a very snappy way to end this post, here's a bit that I randomly flipped to: Page 59 posted:In the Land Of The Lions, the Grey's have constructed a massive factory that builds humanoid machines the locals call, the Metal People. The project known as T1-47 is designed to build humanoid machines called androids that are programmed to kill. These androids, officially called Slayers, are 7 feet tall, are made of titanium-alloyed steel, display crushing strength and carry a variety of weapons. Sham bam bamina! fucked around with this message at 03:44 on Dec 25, 2017 |
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Dec 24, 2017 09:19
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anilEhilated posted:I also probably find it more amusing than I should that Jupiter is a bad guy while Mars and Neptune are loyal angels. Guy can't even decide his stance on pagan religions. Sham bam bamina! fucked around with this message at 09:52 on Dec 24, 2017 |
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Dec 24, 2017 09:44
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A human heart posted:That's also what Milton does in Paradise Lost What I'm saying is that Chris Robinson is one of the greatest authors in the English language.
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Dec 24, 2017 20:54
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'Twas the night before Christmas, and what did I do? Read War of the Archangels, 'cause I love you. And I know it's a long post, but it must be done, Or we'll never get through this son of a gun. Page 20 posted:On the Earth's most luxuriant basin, against the murky backdrop of the mighty Nile, an Aquarian ship rises slowly over a herd of grazing Brachiosaurus, lifting a 30 thousand pound block of limestone, while hundreds of giants mix straw and mud in large pits. Other Aquarian ships of all sizes maneuver over the horizon, some landing at Giza and others transporting people to Heliopolis the greatest theological center in Egypt, and home of a powerful priesthood that provides political and spiritual guidance for the country. That's right, we're getting ancient aliens in this chapter! Or ancient angels, I guess, but the words are practically synonyms at this point. Ra, who has taken the form of a "winged falcon" (as opposed to wingless?), sits on a "topaz throne of swirling fire" in Heliopolis, where he is "teaching Earth's earliest Egyptians high mathematics, linear language, and psychics". This seems to directly contradict the introduction, since we have humans living not only with dinosaurs but before Adam and Eve "REPLENISH the Earth" in the wake of the angels' war, but what kind of spoilsport would care? A scribe asks Ra, "Master, tell us again about the flying boat." Ra says a bunch of technobabble gobbledygook about FTL spaceships (which are apparently powered by an "astral projection method" - no, I don't know either) and quantum teleportation. Page 21 posted:"This is beyond our grasp oh great god of the sun." A Sorcerer utters in despair as he wrestles with what he hears. Meanwhile, on the banks of the Nile, Neptune informs Poseidon (!) that Lord Iniquitous has cracked the code of DNA for Satan, which explains the creature that Michael fought in Chapter 2. Page 21 posted:"Just as Satan has foreseen ... what of Ra?" Ruh-roh! Back to Jandella, where Raphael is tormented by "the two midday suns" (ugh) and the heavy, dusty alien air. He's being held captive in the angelic capital, Falco, a city "steeped in the ancient philosophies and teachings of God, who visits there from time to time". Awfully nice of Him. Falco is specifically the angelic capital because this planet, shockingly, has more than one culture. It's simplistic and stupid, but I'm actually impressed with this fit of (relative!) non-hackiness from an author who seems to have learned everything he knows about science fiction from Revenge of the Sith: Page 22 posted:The rest of Jandella is ruled by four animal kingdoms; The Kingdom of the West is ruled by the Hemolites, ape like creatures that walk upright and speak in an ancient dialect. The Kingdom of the North is ruled by the Walepts, short pig like creatures, which walk upright, but who are less advanced than all the others. The Kingdom of the East is ruled by the Argonians, bird like beings who have the body and hind legs of a lion, the face and wings of an eagle and speak as the Angels. The Kingdom of the South is ruled by the Bacirian Tribal Warriors, who are brave cat like beings. Good job, Chris. Counting the angels, that's three more cultures than even Naboo got. Raphael shares a cell with Jumbla, a captured Hemolite general who informs him (somehow despite the Hermolite's "ancient dialect") of his situation. Page 23 posted:"Falco? Was I out?" Anton has been taken to the royal palace, but Raphael and Jumbla are going to fight in the arena. Gladiatorial combat had been outlawed on Jandella, but Satan "tore up the edict" and established "the Festival of Wickedness". Jumbla points out to Raphael that he, a Guardian Knight, should be able to get them out of this mess without breaking a sweat, but Raphael says that "the rules of engagement" mean that he has to play along and not go Super Saiyan (or "transfigure", to use the book's term). Whatever you need for your action scene, Chris. Page 24 posted:War drums thunder as the tense crowd grows more anxious. The self-imposed leader of Jandella, Bal Ram Pompe, legitimized his take over bid of the Jandella Senate by implementing a state of emergency and taking over the Imperial Jandellaian Army. Please, Chris! No more Star Wars! And no, I didn't leave out any line breaks there; Robinson just doesn't really know what a paragraph is. The arena's spectators shower Pompe with "cheers and roses" as he appears "with his bizarre lover Palatine". This may come as a shock, but Palatine is also male. Minotaurs dispense crude swords and spears to the gladiators, who receive a brief address before they're turned loose: Page 24 posted:Slithering through the doorway in a somewhat standing position is some kind of goo oozing slug, which has a humanoid face. Raphael recoils at the vulgar being and is repulsed by its disgusting stench. The battle starts. Raphael and Jumbla make quick work of "a gigantic Montroy, standing at 20 feet tall and 6 feet wide" and a centaur, but the deadliest enemy isn't a contestant at all: Page 25 posted:In the middle of the arena lies an open pit, full of a billion worms and one giant Gored Worm, which weights eight tons, has eight long tentacles, with razor sharp hooks embedded in them. Jumbla is almost immediately forced to the pit by three other fighters and caught by one of the tentacles, but Raphael is stuck fighting a giant spider. How will he save Jumbla without using his powers? Page 25 posted:The crowd goes wild, which Raphael uses as an indicator he must make a move now to save his friend. He doesn't want to use his powers as a Guardian Knight, but now time is of the essence, so he reaches out his mighty arm and blasts the spider being with a discharge of electric fire. The being explodes as Raphael flies at sonic speeds towards Jumbla with his outstretched sword, cutting the three attackers in half. Then with nuclear propulsion, Raphael eradicates the tentacle, only to be taken by another tentacle himself. Oh. Never mind. Page 26 posted:Before Jumbla can turn to see what's happening, Raphael is pulled into the pit, which draws horrified gasps from the crowd. All goes silent as a sadistic grin sashays across the face of Bal Ram Pompe. Pompe shouts for his "Serpentine Centurions" to execute Raphael, but they "just stand motionless, each looking at the other to see who would be dumb enough to face him". Raphael and Jumbla exit the arena to glorious applause; once outside, Raphael thinks solemnly about the Satanic creatures he's seen, as "the warmth of the two Jandella suns, which once threatened to choke the life right out of his body, seems to gently embrace him, as a mother might a child when giving a hug." Poetic. Suddenly, the two are cornered by "Reptilian war Angels", who are "huge in size, standing about 9 feet tall and about 4 feet wide, each brandishing massive swords of fire". But a friend has been following our heroes... Page 27 posted:"Uriel!" A relieved Raphael exclaims, as he catches a brand new sword of fire the Angel flings his way. The fight is short, but it does give Jumbla enough time to free the other captives. Against all odds, the good guys win! Pages 27-28 posted:"That wasn't so hard." Uriel says, giving a brief smile to his counter part. Sham bam bamina! fucked around with this message at 19:13 on Dec 26, 2017 |
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Dec 25, 2017 08:27
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Chapter 4 explains some of the apparent contradictions that I mentioned last time, but it raises more questions than it answers:Page 29 posted:The earth has seen many ages come and go, its inhabitants unable to grasp the light and intellect of its Creator, thus causing them to fall into darkness and ultimately, be destroyed. Each age is devastated by some kind of cataclysm such as meteorite or flood or by enormous earthquakes, or extreme changes in climate. After the destruction, God raises up another age dotted with new creatures, including many different forms of humanoids such as the Java man, the Neanderthal, and other forms of cave dwellers. Setting aside that "Java Man" is an exceptionally archaic name for Homo erectus and that the Cro-Magnon fossils are just Homo sapiens, this is a ridiculous way to approach paleontology or the Bible or anything at all. Is the idea that Homo erectus didn't evolve into Homo sapiens but was raised up, destroyed, and replaced by divine fiat to look like evolution? Has the war in which Earth "was laid to waste" happened in each "dispensation" or just this one? If it happened in all of them, were there previous Satans before Lucifer got his turn? What happened to them? If it only happened this time around, where did the "Unholy" angels come from before, and why didn't they have a war? If these Cro-Magnon "humanoids" are living in the dispensation before humans, why do they have human cultures like Egypt? And how has Robinson spun all of this out of the first verse and a half of the Bible? Robinson blathers on about more ancient alien crap (in addition to Egypt, the angels have raised up "the kingdoms of Inca Gold", which somehow cover "lands that one day many millenniums from now, will be known as Peru, Mexico, and Central America") before revealing "the grandest empire of the humanoids, Atlantis": Page 30 posted:Atlantis is a civilization unequaled in knowledge and opulence. There, skilled metal workers create the most intricate detail ever known, as agriculturists cultivate the sweetest scented orchards ever seen. Wild animals tamed by the Angels, live freely among the humanoids and flourish. Stunning mansions made of bright white and red stone line the city, out done only by the Grand Palace and Poseidon's Temple. The sprawling Palace compound is pure splendor and was built and is protected by Atlas, the demon son of Poseidon. Robinson spends a few more paragraphs describing Atlantis, which naturally segues into the unrelated city of EnSidious (once again, in the land of Vegan): Page 30 posted:Within the sinister city of EnSidious, the mysterious murky dark gods reside and keep their temple. These horrific vampiric demons, these vicious creatures practice the secret mysteries of the Serpent and lust after the blood of strange flesh. They are evil, depraved, and live without shame in obscene darkness so black, that the most evil minds in the universe shutter at its presence. Their very DNA is encoded with decadent brutal ungodliness; they are the very stench of vile sin, the very seeds of filth, the very flies of Satan. In EnSidious is the temple of Babel, where Satan has come to take a look at the genetic engineering project of Lord Iniquitous: Page 31 posted:The huge doors open causing the lights in the tunnel to fade from red to blue, while the guards take their positions outside the elevator. The evil Emperor enters the most secret biophysics lab in the star system. The futuristic structure is alive and humming with some of the most sophisticated computers known to exist. Large and small Grey's feed information via pulse lasers to impulse receptors, which shoot down to the mainframe computer known as V-Scepter. This lower chamber of bizarre wonder houses genetic engineering equipment, clean rooms and state of the art robotics. Satan moves along a causeway, lined with oval glass containers measuring five feet wide and six feet tall. Inside each incubator lies Velosoraptors or a small T-Rex, and there are hundreds of them. An eight foot tall Grey known as Omega 7 approaches the dark king and bows. Given that Robinson doesn't believe that humans and dinosaurs coexisted, is this supposed to be where the ones in this story come from? Satan is growing vicious carnivores for use in battle, but up to this point, we've only seen herbivores living peacefully in a "Jurassic style neighborhood" and alongside Egyptians. Was that Satan's work? Why? The ancient alien stuff is supposed to be subverting humanity (hominidity?) in some way, if the ominous treatment of the "Mystery School" is anything to go by, but what part would harmless dinosaurs ever play in that? Omega 7 spends far too much time dryly explaining DNA to Satan (and getting it wrong, unless I'm seriously mistaken and every organism on Earth has 23 pairs of chromosomes) before getting to the dinosaurs: Page 32 posted:"We are dealing with minute particles, about the size of a pinhead, yet it contains information equivalent to about six billion chemical letters. So we have taken some of the DNA of the Dinosaurs and genetically altered it by splicing it with Draconian DNA and the results are electrifying if not staggering. I suppose that dragons genetically splice with dinosaurs better than, say, frogs would... but if you already have dragons, wouldn't bringing back dinosaurs just be gilding the lily? Satan and Omega 7 then wander through a conversation that's notably disjointed even for this book. This is going to be a long quote, but the chapter is short enough that I'll allow myself the indulgence: Pages 32-33 posted:"Good." Satan responds as he walks past cages that house full grown Tyrannosaurus Rex's, which recoil in fear. Omega 7 "projects a digital plasma grid from his hand and projects it horizontally like a movie screen", the third time so far that a hologram has been described that way (I ignored one near the end of Chapter 2). He explains to Satan that God is about to make a new creation that will break the cycle of dispensations, which raises the question of why God bothered with six doomed, dead-end races before humans. Page 33 posted:"The reason man is so special is because God will fashion him after Himself, made in his image, the image of God ... man will have the very genes of Yahweh." Finally, the chapter makes one last clunky shift, cutting to Michael at "the Kingdoms outpost known as, the Syrian Plantation" on the planet Tusk, where the war began. The war has turned Tusk to desert, "a horridly hot dust planet made up of gray ash and plum purple sand" - all the way through to the core, apparently. Pages 33-34 posted:The huge apricot sun has just settled beneath the horizon turning the atmosphere into a lilac picture of beauty. Michael pulls his aerial transporter into the neutral zone, which divides the Plantation from the rest of Tusk. He abandons the speeder and walks to a small ridge, which looks out over Terra Scorpius, a city of immense wickedness. Since this chapter is so short and ends so flatly, here's another random excerpt (which might be a spoiler, but who gives a crap?): Page 112 posted:The raven-haired princess lets her undiminished splendor shine in its totality, oozing sexuality from every pour of her full figured body, which holds no charm for Gabriel. He approaches her and lifts his gleaming sword to the necklace around her neck. Sham bam bamina! fucked around with this message at 14:53 on Dec 27, 2017 |
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Dec 27, 2017 12:02
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Page 35 posted:The origin of the dark gods dates back countless eons ago when Satan engaged in orgies with thousands of humanoid females, spreading the seeds of his filth across the civilizations of Earth. These cannibalistic Nephilim are cursed to live in the darkest darkness, their minds consumed by all things horrific and wicked. I love this book so much. Despite being on Tusk, the city of Terra Scorpius is a "Gothic kingdom" that's basically described as a Tim Burton set (then again, putting "jagged spirals" on pretty much any architecture will turn it into a Tim Burton set). The city's "concreted jungle" is filled with "the sound of a billions sins" and swarms of "fallen Angelic cockroaches" (!), and it is here that poor Blanor is held prisoner: Page 36 posted:Hidden in the murky gloom of the lightless night, inside a hellish tomb known as, The Serpents Den, a slaughterhouse of sin and defilement, all forms of strange acts known only to demons are being preformed. Ear shattering Speed metal is blasting as the most perverted acts of blasphemy ever conceived in the soul of Satan are being committed upon the Obscene Circle out on the dance floor. It is here that the Dragon Master, Dark Sidonian Orge, is holding Blanor. He is held in a very small bird like cage reinforced by high intensity ion beams, which hangs over the dance floor. The dark gods and visiting beings of total depravity cheer on the many guards that poke at him with Lightning Sticks.  Michael arrives at "the Guttural Provinces" outside the city (at this point, I'm fairly certain that Robinson considers all possible administrative divisions interchangeable), where he finds "carnage left by the dark gods, who have attacked a small village for sport". This small village is somehow littered with "tens of thousands of corpses", many of which are impaled on stakes arranged in pentagram formations. Robinson spends a paragraph describing the slow, horrible process of their execution in graphic detail, which I think the thread can do without. As Michael wonders aloud "what matter of beast" could do this, he is approached and surrounded by a group of them: Page 37 posted:The dark gods are wise in the ways of evil, and the black magic known as Demonica, but this great understanding in the forbidden knowledge has blinded them and made them arrogant, for they are about to due battle with the Angel of War, the Archangel of the universe, Michael. They fight. Although the agents of darkness are "maddened by the Satanic DNA coursing through their fibers" and heavily armed, they perish by Michael's flaming sword. Page 38 posted:As suddenly as it began it was over ... the mighty Angel falls to his knees and raises his hands to the heavens. A prodigious breeze rushes over him accompanied by a slight whisper. On Jandella, Raphael and Uriel are meeting atop "the hill of Assertion" with military leaders from the animal nations, "making a pack" to organize opposition to the planet's Satanic takeover: Page 38 posted:Jumbla sits, representing the kingdom of the west, the Ape like Hemolite's: Janzeen sits, representing the kingdom of the south, the Cat like Bacirian Tribal Warriors: Nector sits, representing the kingdom of the north, the Pig like Walepts: and Alion sits, representing the kingdom of the east, the Bird like Argonian's. No, I didn't mistype that. I guess that with so many planets falling to Satan, the Federation of Kingdom Nations really is coming apart.  The angels and animals mostly talk about how awful things will be if Satan wins, but Robinson has a surprisingly hard time articulating this. The "dictator" Satan is a "dangerous demagogue" who will simultaneously bring about "anarchy" and "fascism" - Robinson doesn't really know what these things are, but he's pretty sure that they're bad. After a page and a half of this wearying colloquy, the generals of Jandella light a massive torch as a symbol of their resolve, and "the many specie warriors" in the valley below respond by lighting countless torches of their own. It's all very rousing and heartwarming, which is boring, so let's get back to the sordid fun of Terra Scorpius. Or "Terra Scorpious", as Robinson has now decided to spell it; he does it twice on the same page, so I think he might mean it. Michael makes his way through "the conurbation of dark indulgence" to the Serpents Den, where Dark Sidonian Orge apparently rules the whole city "from his throne of obese lust": Page 40 posted:Michael enters the Serpents Den as if he owns the place. The music is loud, the inhabitants insane and their appearance bizarre. Humanoid females, wearing leather collars and not much else consort with the fallen ones and dance in cages. Live beast fight to the death in small pits to the cheers of the crowd, and drugs flow freely as the various mating rituals of the species are practiced right in the open. Vampiric dark gods drink blood from crystal goblets and eat cubed sized bits of flesh taken from their victims. Michael will have none of this, and the crowd parts in fear as he strides toward Orge. "The Dark Lord, who's covered in humanoid females" ignores the angel's demand for Blanor's release, so Michael silences and illuminates the building as a gesture of power. Page 41 posted:Breaking the heavy silence is the lone clapping of Dark Sidonian Orge. ...Did anyone think we'd make it through another chapter without running into Star Wars again? Michael threatens to "summons Yeshua" if Orge doesn't cooperate, so Orge lets him open Blanor's cage before immediately ordering the guards to kill the angels. This is a fatal mistake, and I can only do the consequences justice by transcribing the whole page: Page 42 posted:Beyond the celestial sea from the navel of Heaven, Michael summons a power beyond any ever known on Tusk. Suddenly rivers of rushing fire swirl in and around the dark warriors, in whirlwinds of gushing destruction. Crystal light radiates from everywhere, but yet seems to emanate from nowhere. The dealers of sin try to shield their eyes as Michael comes forth from the light itself, glistening brighter than a trillion suns. His hair seems to be a raging fire; an ocean of righteous anger illuminates everything and surges from his diamond eyes of power. His chest is as gleaming sapphire, his legs are as flaming emeralds, and his arms are as glistening turquoise, his feet as rubies, and his face blazes like a sun of holy vengeance. Sham bam bamina! fucked around with this message at 12:25 on Dec 28, 2017 |
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Dec 28, 2017 09:32
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chitoryu12 posted:I wonder how long it took those dark gods to arrange 10,000 corpses into pentagrams. Were they big pentagrams or did they just use one body for each line?
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Dec 28, 2017 19:05
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Page 43 posted:The Orion Nebula is a cosmic gateway to infinity, the Divine Realm that transcends the space and time universe. There, millions of ships vortex in and out of the time matrix, traversing past Sirius and Nemesis on their way to Earth. These junkie sex dragons of Satan are "genetic blood drinkers, especially menstrual blood", can shape-shift and "vortex" between universes, and are masters of genetic engineering. They would probably be an intimidating foe if six nine-foot Reptilians hadn't been immediately killed when they attacked Raphael and Uriel outside the arena in Chapter 3. (Also, while the Draconians are called "sorceresses" here, I believe that that's an auto-correction to some mangled typo of "sorcerers", since the same thing happened when Robinson tried to write about the sorcerers of Egypt a few chapters ago.) The Draconians are revered as gods by the primitive peoples of Earth, even as "deadly Velosoraptors" ravage the villages and "giant T-Rex's hunt in packs" (nope). The Draconians' reach stretches across the globe, including Mesoamerica: Page 44 posted:The pre-Mayan civilizations in the far off jungles of the West, gather at the immense astronomically aligned pyramidal axis known as, 'The Way Of The Dead', which sits between the pyramid of the moon and the pyramid of the sun. The Indians beat their drums and dance to their god Noctunious in the Black Mass ritual, Feast Of The Virgin Birth. The pre-Mayan nations, with the instruction of Noctunious, have built a society that exhibits prodigious engineering feats including the bar-and-dot calendrical code. I don't believe that either the Maya or "pre-Mayan nations", of which these people are apparently both - and let's not forget that Robinson has already established "the kingdoms of Inca Gold" as covering this area - worshiped a god named Noctunious (or practiced voodoo, for that matter), so I'm at a loss as to why Robinson gave the character that name. It's especially strange because Noctunious is accompanied by "Xiuhcoatl, the fire serpents, which emanate burning rays capable of dismembering humanoids" - that's an Aztec name, but it's at least something. Given that both the Maya and Aztecs worshiped serpent gods (Kukulkan and Quetzalcoatl), it makes no sense that Robinson would pass that up for this goofiness, but I guess nonsensical goofiness has been his MO so far. The depraved Draconian demands blood sacrifice from the humanoids. They drag a prisoner to the altar and present Noctunious with a virgin priestess, who is given a golden chalice. As Noctunious brutally cuts the heart from the man on the altar, the priestess fills the chalice with her blood (an act that is conspicuously not described; take that as you will). Page 45 posted:"This is the flesh of the one who will come, and the blood of the precious womb that holds him." Noctunious yells as he holds the heart and cup high into the night air. So it goes. Meanwhile, Satan has invaded... somewhere: Page 45 posted:On the far side of Earth the military might of Satan has landed within reach of the Angelic city of Andoria undetected, for you see, Andoria is a peaceful city, a city of worship. I'm sure that Robinson meant Andorra (he also mentions Gerona), but I really want this to be the Star Trek planet, shrunk to the size of a city and populated by angels. The angelic general Gideon (is Robinson saying that the Gideon of the Bible was named after an angel?) and his soldiers look on as the invaders approach, "led by Lord Hideous": Page 45 posted:A dense fog settles in the valley, eerily hanging at the base of the trees of the Ahava forest. Through the dense mist, the Angels can hear the grunts, bellows, and roars of monsters past. The Angels try to focus on the shadows that move in the miasma, in the hopes of catching a good look at what kind of beast is approaching them. To their utter amazement, emerging out of the murkiness are the Serpentine Centurions, charging on foot with great speed, some of them riding gigantic T-Rex's and small Velosoraptors. For some reason, the armies' "nitro gunfire" quickly blankets the valley in thick smoke, in addition to the mist. Is "nitro gunfire" deliberately distinct from the "nitro laser fire" in Chapter 1? Are these angels shooting with black powder? The armies charge at each other "with nitro guns blasting and swords slicing": Page 46 posted:Shrieks of pain flow from the murky confusion someplace out of Gideon's eyesight, which reinforces his resolve. But there is not much he can do as the soldiers are floundering on top of one another. Gideon lays hands to his sword and repeatedly strikes a fallen Angel, until it's a bludgeoned mess. Gideon cannot see a thing through the smoke, he coughs relentlessly as tears stream from his eyes. Dark Angel after dark Angel wields death in the face of Gideon, only to be cut down by his gleaming sword. However, the numbers of the enemy are just too great ... the Royal Army is quickly run over by a chaotic stampede the likes of which none of them had ever seen before. While the walled city is protected from the foot soldiers, its "Electro-Nuclear Power Stations" (which supply the city with "more than five billion volts of power" - nope) are outside it on a nearby ridge. Through a "communication bio-tele-sender", the angels' Captain Ulm orders the stations powered up to "pyramidal force" (?), but Venom fighters suddenly swoop in "in ancient attack formation" and destroy them. This appears to have no significance, as no effects of this are described and the city's defenses remain fully powered, but I guess it's a bad thing. After some terrible Star Wars chatter between the angels manning the city's cannons ("Gold I, This is Gold II ..."), the Venom fighters abruptly pull away, and the real firepower approaches: Page 47 posted:"Land Destroyers in Red Zone 1, engage! Engage!" The angels do not stand firm for long before "the most fervent explosion ever encountered by the Royal Army" destroys the wall with a single blast of "volcanic heat", and the city falls to the horde of Lord Hideous. Sham bam bamina! fucked around with this message at 13:14 on Dec 30, 2017 |
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Dec 30, 2017 12:08
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Proteus Jones posted:How do you keep going in the face of... this?  anilEhilated posted:Wouldn't go that far, the AT-AD seems to be another Star Wars reference that he didn't think through. I do admit I have a pretty hard time imagining what the spikes are supposed to be for, though. Sham bam bamina! fucked around with this message at 23:15 on Dec 30, 2017 |
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Dec 30, 2017 23:12
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Yeah, this is nothing. The other day, I found a used copy of a book called When Gods Walk Among Us, by Raoul Peter Mongilardi, and every page I flipped to was just an impenetrable mess of proper nouns - I'm not exaggerating when I say that there's probably an average of at least one per sentence - and jargon; I could barely read any of it without at least having started at the beginning (and probably keeping a notebook handy). I actually might end up buying it at some point, since it turned out to have a surprising amount of positive reception on the Internet for something so outwardly off-putting, but, good or bad, it would never work here. At the other end of the scale, you have simple but mind-numbingly homogeneous mush like Ulillillia's The Legend of the 10 Elemental Masters, which is immediately readable in the same way that a phone book or a manual is immediately readable. It's definitely an interesting book, but again, it's not something that can really be shared this way. War of the Archangels, despite its histrionics, is a book that communicates effectively and engagingly, regardless of what it's communicating. Robinson can barely type (at this point, I think that his ineptitude at usage and punctuation can probably be chalked up to dyslexia), but his sentences have nicely varied structures and always do their part to push the story along (until he gets carried away with setting a scene). And it is a story that he's telling! It's a ridiculous, shallow, pulpy story, but there's always something happening and a clearly motivated character who's making it happen. There is so, so much amateur writing out there that's both boring to read and boring in its substance (like we found out when On Matissia Wings wasn't hundreds of pages of Shartball and chybuts) that I honestly applaud Chris Robinson for having a big, crazy idea and and writing a small, crazy book about it without letting the energy ever flag. This is the kind of book that I'm always hoping to get when I pull an ugly, printed-on-demand paperback off the shelf.
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Dec 31, 2017 20:03
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A new year, a new chapter. Chapter 7 begins with Chris Robinson's vision of Heaven. If there's one place where it's appropriate for him to ramble, it's here, and I'll be generous with my transcription: Page 48 posted:Heaven, the eternal city of God sits in he furthest regions of the North, inside the walls of a quantum universe parallel to the one the earth resides in. Heaven is divided into two separated regions, one being an enormous enclosed garden planet called Eden, which is four times the size of earth. This virtual paradise is inhabited by most of the Angelic citizens, carefully cultivating exquisite plants, animals, music, and art. The perfection of earth is but a mirrored reflection of the walled park, a mere shadow of its immense mind boggling superlative flawlessness. The city, which is "nothing short of visual and sensual magnificence to the grandest degree", has 216-foot-thick walls built from twelve types of precious stones. 216 feet, of course, is roughly converted from 144 cubits; I'm surprised that Robinson left that up to me to figure out. Each wall incorporates three "Stargates, where the Angels vortex in and out of the time matrix by tunneling through the space—time continuum via wormholes". The angels of the city "go to and fro, either walking among the buildings, flying on their own power, or by air ship" and are dressed in robes, coats, and capes of every color. Processions "with full drum cores and multiple flag bearers" circuit the streets in constant praise of God. In this time of crisis, the Guardian Knights have been called to "the Court of Judgments" for a meeting in "the hall of Supreme Justice", a "stately spherical room made of ivory, marble, polished white sandstone and burnished cobalt onyx". Curiously, this place is adorned with "statues of the mighty Angels, who became famous during the infamous Wars of the Third Heaven and, first war of the species." I guess the questions I had for Chapter 4 about previous angelic wars are starting to be answered? Maybe? Whatever, it's finally time for some badass Old Testament angels! (And God!) Page 50 posted:In the center of the marble floor the Guardian Knight insignia proclaims its majesty, while burning candles in ornate diamond and gold candelabrums and menorahs encircle the insignia. Seated around the candles facing each other are the Elders, each Guardian Knight standing behind his mentor. The Cherubs are living creatures, humanoid in nature, but have four faces and six wings. They contain the hands of the humanoids, and the frontal face is like that of mortal man, but they also have the face of a lion on the right side of their head, the face of an ox on the left side and the face of an eagle facing backwards. They are the most powerful Angelic creatures, except for the mysterious six-winged Seraphim. The Cherubs are wise, ferocious and protectors of the Shekinah gate, but their primary function is to be the living chariot of God; they are the bearers of his throne. No word on the resemblance of His glow to a night light's, unfortunately. The angels, including one named Apocrypha, discuss the battles raging across the stars, even as far as "the Otter Regions". "Sounds like war of the species part two," Gabriel remarks. The angels are disheartened, but Yeshua tells them that this whole order is about to end: Pages 51-52 posted:"You wonder why I allow the war to continue ... I do not want a Kingdom built on fear and distrust. I want to be loved because I am worthy of love, and I want to give you love ... because I want to. There are many things, which you do not need to know, but there are others that you may. Knowledge is the function of the Spirit; emotion is tied to the soul. The Mystery of Elohim will be explained in the new creation called, Man. Man will be created in the very image of the Trinity, for He too will be a trinity, consisting of body, soul and spirit. I the living Word, the Holy Son will one day reside within man. The living Spirit of Fire will be the pillar of passion that connects heaven and earth; He will be the energy source that communicates between God and man. My Spirit will come to live with the soul of the ones who follow Me, and be the communication link between his body and the source of eternal life." God then tells the angels that the world of humans will be "how the universe should have worked from the beginning" - again, God seems very short-sighted to have gone to the trouble of all these faulty creations so far - and dispatches them to EnSidious. While you're figuring out what "humanoid" could possibly mean without the reference point of "human" or what "human" could mean in a world that's only seen humanoids, have some poetry! Page 52 posted:Suddenly emanating from the swirling spirit of light is a loud voice that proclaims to the future generations the proclamations of God. Shortly afterward, the archangel Mars is studying history in "the great Hall of Knowledge", the angelic library, where "the endless rows of holding units [...] tower 300 feet to the top of the vaulted ceilings". It probably would be difficult to reach most of the catalog on such high shelving - would be, without using the SOURCE: Pages 52-53 posted:An Angelic mind releases kinetic energy, which reverberates through the surrounding atmosphere, much like musical notes being played on an instrument. This kinetic energy when infused with the workings of faith can transpose itself into a physical manifestation, in this case by causing the books in question to un-shelf themselves and to glide over to the observation table. Neptune takes the opportunity to sort-of answer more of my questions from Chapter 4 and raise a whole lot more: Page 53 posted:"Yes ... the world in it's first dispensation was filled with all kinds of creatures, unicorns, Elves, Trolls and the likes ... Lucifer wanted to rule them harshly, but God would not allow it. So Lucifer devised a plan to take the Throne, he thought if he could control faith and the system in which it works he could create life or stop the creation process of the Creator, thus nullifying His power. Many believed this idea and war ensued in which the earth was destroyed. God granted Satan the earth and then filled it with dinosaurs and turned Satan into a Winged Serpentine Dragon. God's humor I guess, making Satan the king of the lizards and turning him into one." I have so many questions right now (particularly how Satan was back to being Lucifer and in charge of the other angels by the time of this story, another war and four destroyed dispensations later), but there's Star Wars to get to. Neptune, you see, has come here to tell Mars (Anakin) that he should be a full-fledged Guardian Knight (Jedi Master) and that the Counsel (Council) are blindly keeping him down. And, of course, this dissatisfaction that Neptune is cultivating wouldn't be complete without the facet of forbidden love: Page 54 posted:Sensing the Archangels frustration and uneasiness in being kept locked up like this Neptune manipulates a volume of his own to the table and opens it. Unexpectedly a scene of a beautiful Cro-Magnon woman kissing a well-built male begins to play itself out in front of Mars. Sham bam bamina! fucked around with this message at 04:04 on Jan 2, 2018 |
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Jan 1, 2018 22:33
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australiar posted:the numbers are real, the significance is underlined by their inclusion in the book, so we know they mean something but it's left up to us to guess what it is Sham bam bamina! fucked around with this message at 10:02 on Jan 2, 2018 |
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Jan 2, 2018 09:59
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Chapter 8 is pretty long, so I'll split it up like Chapter 2.Page 55 posted:The two morning suns light up the skies of Jandella, driving temperatures to record highs before most of the species stir from their nocturnal hibernation. Raphael, Uriel, and Jumbla waste no time in surviving the surrounding area, quickly scaling the Trillidad hills, which over look Falco, so as to spy on their enemies. Pompe is readying the city for "the first annual Feast Of Accession" in celebration of his rise to power. While citizens and slaves busy themselves about the preparations, Pompe and his dark mentors are holding a meeting: Page 56 posted:"Isn't this all just decadently wicked?" Bal Ram Pompe spouts with pride, not drawing a response from the Masters. Pompe plans to have a sacrifice at the coming feast. He wants to kill Jumbla, but he will have to make do with another victim. This scene ends with a very strange exchange: Pages 56-57 posted:"I'm sure he's well hidden." Virgo offers. What is Anton doing here? I mean, I know what he's doing here, but what is he doing? He's a prisoner, but he somehow commands Pompe's forces, even though he refuses to submit to Pompe, who gives the orders anyway, but decides to relay them through this prisoner because...? Was this seriously the only way for Robinson to show Anton as Pompe's captive? We go back to Earth (I probably should have mentioned this much earlier, but these scene breaks are separated by maple leaf dingbats, which give the book an incongruously Canadian tint) for some confusing worldbuilding: Page 57 posted:The fallen Angels of Earth, who feel emboldened by the capture of the Oracles of Knowledge and Sacred Scroll of Light, openly embrace the empires of the humanoids making them their own. I'm going to stop right here for a second - if the fallen angels are controlling these civilizations because Satan has the Oracles and Scroll, what the heck was going on before that happened? Ra had clearly been running Egypt for a while before the news got there, and Egypt is not presented as an aberration. It might be argued that the fallen angels now rule "openly" and were covert before, but Ra seemed pretty open about reigning from his topaz throne of swirling fire. Whatever, let's get back to these empires: Page 57 posted:Many provinces now dot the planet, such as the continent of Mu, and the Lemurion civilization, which boast of electrical power, air conditioning, airless cylinder tubes, and crystals that glow at night to light their homes. The cities of Mohenjo Daro and Haroppa, jewels of the Indian subcontinent are a remarkable feat in city planning with an amazing plumbing and sewage system that runs through both cities. It almost seems like Robinson is about to get off the ancient alien train at this point. Plumbing is an impressive accomplishment for an ancient people, but it's not that "amazing" for spacefaring angels to set up. And are these people really "brilliant astronomers and mathematicians" if they're just studying the existing astronomy and mathematics of their extraterrestrial leaders? It's hard to square the responsibility for these wonders that Robinson ascribes to the angels with the awed reverence that he gives their supposed underlings. Whatever, all that matters is that we've finally learned where China got all that jade. Earth's largest spaceport is Baalbek (which Robinson should probably call Heliopolis of Phoenicia, although that would be only slightly less anachronistic - and peeing in the ocean compared to what's coming up), because the Trilithon there was clearly part of an angelic landing pad before the Romans built a temple around it. This spaceport is so large that it has entire "beacon cities" guiding vessels to it, with Mount Zion serving as "the Galactic Control Center called, The Mount Of Direction". What became of this massive assembly between then and now is anyone's guess. Michael and the other Guardian Knights have been sent to Earth, but he can't land at Baalbek because it's controlled by the fallen angels, who are consumed "in the incestuous fire of sins darkest grip". Instead, he heads south, to the lush, not-yet-frozen paradise of Antarctica: Page 58 posted:He approaches over Enderby and makes his way around the coast of the Ross Sea, until he reaches Queen Maud Land, where he sets Galactic One down. ...I love this book. Sham bam bamina! fucked around with this message at 05:03 on Jan 4, 2018 |
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Jan 3, 2018 19:55
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Page 59 posted:In the Land Of The Lions, the Grey's have constructed a massive factory that builds humanoid machines the locals call, the Metal People. The project known as T1-47 is designed to build humanoid machines called androids that are programmed to kill. These androids, officially called Slayers, are 7 feet tall, are made of titanium-alloyed steel, display crushing strength and carry a variety of weapons. The aliens talk about Bible codes and free will in an exchange that you couldn't pay me to type out, but the scene ends on a high note: Page 60 posted:Soon after entering the compound a 7-foot tall Slayer is standing in front of Omega 7 with a huge slab of granite in his hands. The Grey looks the machine over almost mesmerized by its rotating eyes that emanate a blue hue ... then the mechanical beast crushes the massive rock turning it to dust with its two hydraulic driven arms. Meanwhile, the good guys are partying down in Antarctica, somewhat undercutting the urgency of their mission: Page 60 posted:Deep in the forest of Queen Maud Land the Queens court, her people and the Angelic Knights are celebrating their freedom from tyrannical rule by indulging themselves with drink, food, laughter, music and dance. Durganot dances around the flames of a mighty fire with the Queen herself, while Steven dances with a group of small children. Michael is honored that the musicians play their hearts out, and enjoys the laughter so loud heaven itself can hear it. As he eats of a freshly baked loaf of bread he sparks of an idea and leans in to Steven. Gabriel gives in. He starts by mentioning that it was a "night much like this one [...] on the remote regions of Eden" but is quickly interrupted: Page 61 posted:"There's no darkness on Eden." Steven interjects as a question. I guess that clears things up. Michael introduces his story proper with an ellipsis, which Robinson uses to segue into third-person omniscient narration of the actual events: Page 61 posted:... The celestial sea dotted with trillions of stars is laid out over the horizon of Anwar like a panoramic four-dimensional movie being shown on a crystal dome. The Atonement Nebula shines its red hue so ever bright as does the Milky Way Galaxy, reflecting the mighty power of the Absolute. Shimmering streams of Shekinah Glory streak across the atmosphere like blazing shooting stars, while the three closest moons shimmer their soft colors of blue, silver, and apricot orange over the Crescent Sea. The roaring waves crash against colossal pyramids constructed of the purest, whitest marble known in the universe. Some of the pyramids are underwater laboratories, which are partially submerged, while others house the Brotherhood Of Illumination schools called, Delphia. That's a lot of lovely imagery. Where will Robinson go from here? Pages 61-62 posted:Michael and his student Gabriel, and Uriel and his student Raphael follow the narrow path of enlightenment, which takes them past the Honey Bank Brook. Gabriel keeps one eye on the path and the other on the flowing honey until he can't stand it any longer and dips his fingers into the flowing delight.  Gabriel and Michael take off and have a playful race in the air, with Uriel and Raphael quickly joining them. They fly over the ocean before heading back to the city, "zing zigzagging in and around the pyramids just missing the massive structures". This sets the scene for a minor but notably stupid detour: Page 63 posted:Inside one of the fantastically gargantuan pyramids the Grand Master Educator Jadel inspects the newest younglings that are standing at attention before him. And you thought that Robinson was scraping the bottom of the Star Wars barrel before! (Not to spoil anything, but this is far from the last time that we'll be seeing that word.) As Jadel is solemnly instructing his protegés ("whom marvel at his crystal white robe and flowing diamond silk hair") on the "sober determination" needed in taking on the grave responsibilies of the Guardian Knights, the racers hilariously interrupt by hilariously swooping in and hilariously almost knocking Jadel over. It's all so hilarous that you'll just have to imagine it yourself instead of reading it. After some hilarious banter (" 'Look everybody, we pay now and play later.' A lone youngling spouts."), the race is resumed, but now it has a destination: Pages 63-64 posted:Lucifer's Majestic Emerald Palace sits on a resilient onyx precipice overlooking the sea. The four Angels approach at full speed, swirling in and around each other, until Michael blasts forth with a remarkable expeditious amount of atomic propelled velocity that literally sheers the night skies. On seeing the angels' approach ("which brings a broad smile over his chiseled face"), Lucifer ducks back into his palace for a quick moment with himself before greeting them. In keeping with the idea that Robinson would rather be watching a movie than writing a book, this bit has a mysteriously diegetic score: Pages 63-64 posted:He moves back inside and gazes into a mirror and slowly raises his hand, touching it to the crystallite glass. Chilling whispers and hypnotic music, which seem to seep from Lucifer's very, being, consume him. Before Lucifer can fall any deeper into his pride, Michael "brings Lucifer back from the edge" by abruptly entering. This doesn't seem to have brought Lucifer very far back, though: Page 64 posted:"Would you just look at this ... the five ultimate Angels in all the universes right here at Anwar. You know this Brotherhood of Illumination could rule the cosmos as well as any power ever known. Take the Universe Athaliah or the Universe Golan, or the Universe of Migdalel, or Shama or Karnak, or this newest Universe Tibhath ... I mean how many Universes does He need?" Lucifer invites his visitors to a feast. After a bit of unintentional homoeroticism, they all go: Page 64 posted:"Be careful Lucifer, I sense sensuality in your voice." Michael again warns. Once seated, the angels raise their swords "to their foreheads" (?) in a toast (?) to Yahweh. And that's it. That's Gabriel's story. Riveting, isn't it? In all fairness, it gets a pretty muted reception from the Antarctic court: Page 65 posted:"Oh thank you Gabriel for that great story." Queen Maud says gently trying to understand it all. Michael confirms that Yeshua has sent him and his forces to EnSidious, which is "to the North of here" - I'm pretty sure that most places would be - and says that they will be stopping in Atlantis on the way. Neptune offers the resources of his realm on arrival, but it turns out that he has other plans... Page 65 posted:Faraway from the peace of Queen Maud Land, on the outskirts of Atlantis the amphibious fallen Angelic beast under the rule of King Poseidon receive a message of their own ... there before them is a hologram of a brooding Neptune. Sham bam bamina! fucked around with this message at 05:07 on Jan 6, 2018 |
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Jan 6, 2018 02:56
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Sorry for the delay on Chapter 9; I've been busy with a lot of dumb crap these past few days. I hope that this chapter's brilliance makes up for the wait. This is the last chapter that I'll be splitting for the foreseeable future. They're getting longer in general now, so I'll be aiming for more of a happy medium between longer posts and lighter transcriptions going forward, but this one's 13 pages, and I can't get it into a single reasonably sized post without throwing out a lot of the good stuff. Page 66 posted:The distant planet of Rahab sits in gloomy darkness, even though on occasion, the sun does manage to burn through the black mist that hovers over the rough terrain giving the atmosphere a dull gray hue. The land is mostly a harsh mixture of treacherous marshes filled with giant lizards, dinosaurs, dragons and deserts filled with humanoid eating scorpions. The capital city of evil, such as a billion minds could never comprehend, encompasses one fourth of the planet and is simply known as Babylon. Satan's "Unholy Six-Galactic Alliance" is headquartered here, and he is about to give a proclamation "to the masses that follow him in blind drunkenness". But what of the dark leader himself? Pages 66-67 posted:Satan strolls down a massive elongated hallway inside his black iron palace ever alone, except for Sindorft, a black as night Raven with a blood dipped beak that sits on the living fiends shoulder. Satan's sin and hatred forever increases, which constantly reshapes his image into a more vulgar hideous creature of the night. The sin of a billion universes bores deep into the very core of his Spirit being, rotting him like a piece of dead meat. He smells of sulfur and rot and oozes putrid puss and sticky black goo. This process has de-evolved the revolting lord into a being that has become deadened to his world of personal insane madness. Satan is here joined by his propaganda chief, named Serb. Whether or not other Slavic nationalities are so represented remains to be seen. Serb doesn't appear to serve any purpose in this scene except to show the fear in Satan's underlings of his temper: "In these blinding furies of frenzied wrath Satan can fly into a depraved vicious paroxysm, which he attacks everyone in sight with violent mind rattling roars that can last for hours." Satan is in relatively high spirits tonight, though, and his speech is a lavish spectacle: Page 68 posted:Satan steps out onto a huge balcony, which overlooks millions upon millions of Reptilian soldiers and Slayers marching in a grand military procession in front of the iron palace. Huge flags with the Satanic Reptilian insignia of a pentagram with a twisted cross, called a swastika, residing in the center are flying over the two towers of Babel. Grey's fly their observation disks in ancient Babylon formation, doing fly bys as massive canons are fired. Beyond the army on the enormous mall, which leads to the immense Aquarian Pyramid, are countless myriads of Angelic beings, awaiting their Masters instruction. Satan's speech then turns into a fascinating rant about a new religion that he plans to create in repudiation of God - it reminds me strongly of a lot of Futurist writing, although I seriously doubt that Robinson has read any of it - but there's just too much to transcribe, so I'll skip to the end. (Before I do, here's a particularly manifesto-like sentence: "The perverse firelight of self-defilement will burn wildly in your children's eyes as I dance happily in the seats of power of your cities!") Pages 68-69 posted:"God says that I am a bestial animalistic creature who is into every kind of degradation, perversion, and depravity this side of creation. He says I am vile, base, hateful, sinfully wicked and joyfully sinful! Well guess what, I am! I am gross pornographic indecency, I am an abomination unto God, I am a sewer of contamination, a dung hill of pus, an utter cesspool of defilement and I will bring with me such vile sexual perversion, such utter insane sickness so demented you'll never be able to wash the depravity from your mind. I will rise out of the sewers and drown your hideaways in your culture driven beliefs! I will set my throne far above Yahweh, far above the Guardian Knights, and will destroy this new creation called Mankind, which will arise from the ash heap of yet another failed attempt of an impudent Creator-better pray I'm not around! For I am that which is, was and will be! I am that I am, I am God!" Meanwhile, the angel Mars, on the planet Mars, is not euphoric at all: Page 69 posted:Mars enters the relaxation chambers of his golden palace, which sits just west of the mighty carved face that bares his likeness on the Cydonia plains. Mars, an imposing figure, standing 6 feet 5 inches tall, displays facial features of a lion and strength of a thousand bull elephants. He morphs back and forth between a humanoid male and his own likeness, as he paces back and forth relentlessly across the blazing emerald floor. Most Angels have wings, some are biological apertures that are regularly seen, but others, like the ones Mars has, are sub-atomic molecular strands of nuclear energy, which materializes when they are needed. The wings of Mars repeatedly vortex in and out of reality as he shape-shifts back and forth between humanoid and mighty Angel of the Lord. Neptune enters the room, interrupting Mars's thoughts. He asks Mars why he isn't on Earth with the other Guardian Knights, then "remembers" that Mars isn't one yet. His manipulation here is blatantly obvious, to the point that even Mars warily moves to draw his sword, but Neptune has brought someone with him: Page 71 posted:"Mars, this is Aishe Nubit, a virgin priestess of the grand mystery schools of Egypt." Chris, you master of wordplay! Mars says that he wants nothing to do with the "treason" that Neptune is tempting him into, but Aishe isn't easily discouraged: Page 71 posted:The ravenous woman turns her back to Mars and unfastens her green tunic and lets it shimmer down her long body until it lies on the floor. Mars eyes linger on her long slender back as she steps into his muscular body. But, sadly, Mars eventually loses his resolve under her advances: Page 71 posted:Aishe strokes Mars face, he struggles to resist the lustful maiden, a part of him not wanting to give in, but he does not run, instead he absorbs the feeling of lust, breathes her in as he slowly changes into a handsome humanoid male who begins kissing her without restraint. Sham bam bamina! fucked around with this message at 03:18 on Jan 10, 2018 |
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Jan 10, 2018 00:45
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DeadFatDuckFat posted:Uh, how does he "ravage" her? The angels don't have the right equipment, yeah? Also Steven is the best Angel name. quote:"I understand that when an Angel changes to humanoid form he is like that of a horse?" Aishe says, her eyes burning with lust. Also, I apologize to everyone for taking so long to follow this last update. I'm trying to get a lot of stuff squared away right now; I'll update regularly again once I get back into a normal routine.
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Jan 17, 2018 07:25
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