UKMT Feb 18 - Goverment Clowns DTF - The Something Awful Forums

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Debate & Discussion > UKMT Feb 18 - Goverment Clowns DTF

learnincurve: May 15, 2014; Smoosh

The only different between how we deal with snow in the 1980s, and how we deal with snow today, is that today old people get to make up poo poo about how things were done differently and better in the 1980s.

# ? Feb 28, 2018 15:44

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# ? May 22, 2024 13:55

Barry Foster: Dec 24, 2007; What is going wrong with that one (face is longer than it should be)

I keep catching myself thinking 'this, surely this, will be the moment when it finally becomes undeniable that Brexit is an unworkable poo poo show'

But it won't be

# ? Feb 28, 2018 15:47

Pluskut Tukker: May 20, 2012

Junior G-man posted:

The EC really has done a poo poo on the cat among the pigeons with their proposed withdrawal treaty, it's amazing how people are finally, belatedly and stupidly starting to realise that the Glorious Brexit Vision and Ireland don't mix so much.

Plus the DUP can suck it; what a disingenuous bunch who wants the benefits of everything but the drawbacks of nothing. Special NI snowflakes indeed.

I'm really surprised though by the conspicuous lack of people screaming bloody murder about how EU citizens retain free movement rights during the transition and UK citizens don't (other than by those directly affected of course). UK citizens abroad have basically been abandoned by their government.

# ? Feb 28, 2018 15:47

hookerbot 5000: Dec 21, 2009

Aphex- posted:

From St Andrews google recommends either taking A9 then A86, or since I'm actually staying a bit south of Fort William it's also suggesting A85/A82.

It's actually pretty balmy here compared to everywhere else (I'm 40 miles south of Fort William), and according to met office not meant to get much worse. I wouldn't go up Ben Nevis or anything but walking round the lower places should be okay.

The roads have basically disintegrated this winter so watch out for potholes.

# ? Feb 28, 2018 15:50

Pesmerga: Aug 1, 2005; So nice to eat you

Pluskut Tukker posted:

I'm really surprised though by the conspicuous lack of people screaming bloody murder about how EU citizens retain free movement rights during the transition and UK citizens don't (other than by those directly affected of course). UK citizens abroad have basically been abandoned by their government.

Those citizens of nowhere can accept having nothing. :smug:

# ? Feb 28, 2018 15:51

Tijuana Bibliophile: Dec 30, 2008; Scratchmo

coffeetable posted:

If your idea of 'doing good' is aligned with most people's, you probably want to donate to one of the GiveWell top charities. They have done a lot of research into which organisations actually do the most good per pound donated. Here's a list of the UK tax status of these charities. I believe that any organisation which can claim GiftAid is also eligible for GAYE.

some goodsmaxxing tips here

# ? Feb 28, 2018 15:51

Thanks Ants: May 21, 2004; #essereFerrari

I may laugh up some vital organs if this is the event that cause Sinn Fein to take their seats in Parliament

# ? Feb 28, 2018 15:52

forkboy84: Jun 13, 2012; Corgis love bread. And Puro

Jedit posted:

It's nice to think otherwise, but almost every school in Aberdeenshire is shut today and most of the ones that aren't are closed to transport (meaning only pupils who live in the immediate area should go) or were only open until 1pm.

There are 7 secondary schools and 42 primary schools closed in Highland but I'd still say they've handled the weather alright all things considered. The major routes are open.

# ? Feb 28, 2018 15:54

Junior G-man: Sep 15, 2004; Wrapped in a mystery, inside an enigma

Tijuana Bibliophile posted:

some goodsmaxxing tips here

How come anti-malaria and de-working charities work so well :confused:

# ? Feb 28, 2018 15:56

Jedit: Dec 10, 2011; Proudly supporting vanilla legends 1994-2014

Thanks Ants posted:

I may laugh up some vital organs if this is the event that cause Sinn Fein to take their seats in Parliament

They literally cannot do this and remain Sinn Fein MPs.

# ? Feb 28, 2018 15:59

Illuyankas: Oct 22, 2010

I'm one of the literally hundreds of people who are expecting a Royal Mail parcel today that check the tracking and see it's marked as Address Inaccessible, then call the Royal Mail Complaints line to ask why while looking out the window at all the snow

# ? Feb 28, 2018 16:04

Gort: Aug 18, 2003; Good day what ho cup of tea

Junior G-man posted:

How come anti-malaria and de-working charities work so well

Probably because there are cheap, portable and effective countermeasures

# ? Feb 28, 2018 16:07

big scary monsters: Sep 2, 2011; -~Ｓｋｕｌｌｗａｖｅ~-

Reading today's PMQs transcript, and it's interesting that Corbyn has started actually responding to May's content-free answers with his own comments, and the Speaker seems to be allowing it.

For instance, Corbyn asks the PM about business representatives saying that Brexit is idiotic and will damage UK business. The PM replies:

The Prime Minister posted:

The right hon. Gentleman talks about the views of business, particularly of small business. I refer him to what the Federation of Small Businesses said about our position:

�The UK small business community sees the potential wins of an independent UK global trade policy�we want trade kept as easy as possible with the EU27�� that is our position� small businesses are pushing to export to new growth areas�the US, English-speaking nations, emerging economies and the Commonwealth.�

We want a good trading relationship with the European Union and free trade deals around the rest of the world under an independent sovereign nation.

Corbyn goes on to ask a question about regulatory alignment, but first this:

The Rt. Hon. Jeremy Corbyn, MP posted:

The International Trade Secretary says that business organisations and the TUC have got it all wrong, and that they do not know best how to prosper or grasp opportunities. I put it gently to the Prime Minister that they might have more of a clue than he has about the interests of business, jobs and living standards.

May then tells us how clear she has been about some stuff:

The Prime Minister posted:

I have already set out in some detail the position that the Government are taking, and I will elaborate on that further this week. We want to ensure that across a variety of sectors�the goods sector, but also looking at issues like financial services which are such a crucial part of our economy�we get the relationship that means that we are able to ensure that we see that trade going across the borders between the United Kingdom and the remaining EU27 members, and that we have no hard border between Northern Ireland and Ireland; we are absolutely committed to delivering on that.

Corbyn responds with a little sass again.

The Rt. Hon. Jeremy Corbyn, MP posted:

The endless round of after-dinner speeches by the Prime Minister on Europe does not really substitute for negotiations or for what is actually going to result from the negotiations.

He then asks about EU immigrants and how the UK will deal with them all loving off back where they came from. May brings up nurses, presumably to remind us what a grand job Mr. Hunt has been doing.

The Prime Minister posted:

We do have a care about the number of nurses and GPs that we have in the NHS. That is why we have set the highest levels of numbers of people in training for both nurses and GPs. It is why we have significantly increased the opportunities not just for people who are coming from the European Union to work in our national health service but for those people here in this country who want to work in our NHS to get those training places and do the excellent job that we know they will do for patients in our national health service.

The Rt. Hon. Jeremy Corbyn, MP posted:

From a Government who have cut the nurse training bursary, who do not seem to understand that it takes eight years to train a doctor, and are completely oblivious, apparently, to the fact that there are 100,000 vacancies in the NHS now�[Interruption.] I suggest that some Members get a life and go and visit a hospital to see just how hard those people work in order to cover for the vacancies that are there. Surely we need to give immediate, real assurance to EU nationals that they have a future in this country.

He then continues, asking about Northern Ireland. I'll quote the exchange in full.

The Rt. Hon. Jeremy Corbyn, MP posted:

Just three months ago, the Foreign Secretary told the House with regard to Northern Ireland:

�There can be no hard border. That would be unthinkable�.�[Official Report, 21 November 2017; Vol. 631, c. 848.]

That is what he said. Yet in a leaked letter to the Prime Minister, he wrote:

�even if a hard border is reintroduced, we would expect to see 95% + of goods pass�.

[Interruption.] He is shouting at the moment�he is obviously mixing up the border with the Camden-Islington border. Can the Prime Minister confirm that she will not renege on commitments made in phase 1 to keep an open border in Ireland?

The Prime Minister posted:

The right hon. Gentleman actually raised three different issues in that question, so I will address all of them. He raised the issue of rights for European Union nationals. Of course, a key part of the December agreement�the December joint report that we agreed with the European Union�was about the rights of EU citizens living here in the United Kingdom and the rights of United Kingdom citizens living in the EU27. That was an important thing to have agreed at an early stage in the negotiations. We said we would do it and we did just that.

The right hon. Gentleman talks about the number of nurses. Of course, there are now 13,900 more nurses on our wards than there were under Labour. He is talking about the number of years that it takes to train doctors. He said that it takes eight years to train a doctor. Well, if he is worried about the number of doctors there are now, eight years ago it was a Labour Government who were deciding the number of doctors that were going to be trained, so he can talk about that.

Finally, he referred to the position on Northern Ireland. The foreign secretary and I are absolutely committed to ensuring that we deliver on no hard border between Northern Ireland and Ireland. That's the position of the UK Government, it's the position of the parties in Northern Ireland, it's the position of the Irish Government, and it was what we agreed in the December agreement on that joint report. We are all committed to ensuring there is no hard border between Northern Ireland and Ireland.

The transcript is actually incomplete, missing out a bunch of stuttering, piss-taking, posh booing noises, Corbyn laying into May some more and her talking about Labour betraying voters. You can watch the whole thing here if you like:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FvFTEqxZZNw

Not an especially interesting PMQs tbh, May failing to answer any question about Brexit posed to her isn't exactly new and there aren't even any particularly sick burns. The scores from our thought leaders in the commentariat:

The Guardian posted:

PMQs verdict: Corbyn misses key Brexit attack line on Irish border

New Statesman posted:

Jeremy Corbyn delivers his strongest performance on Brexit

The Mirror posted:

Jeremy Corbyn grills Theresa May over Irish border question as EU publish draft withdrawal agreement

https://twitter.com/daily_politics/status/968833334045376512

# ? Feb 28, 2018 16:20

Rarity: Oct 21, 2010; ~*4 LIFE*~

PMQs is a worthless garbage fire

# ? Feb 28, 2018 16:55

Dead Goon: Dec 13, 2002; No Obvious Flaws

Will The Prime Minister join me in declaring everything that the Conservatives have ever done is great, and that she is also great?

# ? Feb 28, 2018 16:59

Iymarra: Oct 4, 2010; Survived AGDQ 2018 Awful Games block!; Grimey Drawer

Re: The Absolute Boy, it pleases me every day to see him sticking the boot in. One day he'll be in charge and it'll be glorious.

Re: Snowchat - been upgraded to a red warning here. Local shopping centre has closed, buses and all public transport cancelled. Warnings that smaller communities and those up farm roads / backroads may be isolated over the next couple days or could lose power.

# ? Feb 28, 2018 17:01

Barry Foster: Dec 24, 2007; What is going wrong with that one (face is longer than it should be)

Dead Goon posted:

Will The Prime Minister join me in declaring everything that the Conservatives have ever done is great, and that she is also great?

*Posh brayings of assent*

# ? Feb 28, 2018 17:04

Zephro: Nov 23, 2000; I suppose I could part with one and still be feared...

Doctor_Fruitbat posted:

I thought Toys R Us were already in administration?

Maplin are overpriced on basically everything and it is not even slightly surprising that they are going under.

They were bought by a private equity firm and saddled with a big loan at punitive interest rates, so it's doubly no surprise that they're going under.

edit: Maplin I mean

# ? Feb 28, 2018 17:04

Jedit: Dec 10, 2011; Proudly supporting vanilla legends 1994-2014

big scary monsters posted:

Reading today's PMQs transcript, and it's interesting that Corbyn has started actually responding to May's content-free answers with his own comments, and the Speaker seems to be allowing it.

Well, they are the Prime Minister's Questions. Who is the Speaker to complain if he wants to answer them himself?

# ? Feb 28, 2018 17:08

coffeetable: Feb 5, 2006; TELL ME AGAIN HOW GREAT BRITAIN WOULD BE IF IT WAS RULED BY THE MERCILESS JACKBOOT OF PRINCE CHARLES

YES I DO TALK TO PLANTS ACTUALLY

Tijuana Bibliophile posted:

some goodsmaxxing tips here

If you're lucky enough to be a higher rate taxpayer, please remember you can claim 20%/25% of your donations back on your tax return.

(Snap for pension contributions, assuming they're not done with salary sacrifice)

# ? Feb 28, 2018 17:13

Zephro: Nov 23, 2000; I suppose I could part with one and still be feared...

coffeetable posted:

because we don't spend on preparing for a thing that rarely happens

Yeah. British winters are mostly a miserable symphony of cold rain and darkness, like a cyberpunk movie with less neon and chrome. Snow is pretty rare. But because we're a maritime-climate island on the edge of a large continental land mass we occasionally get actually cold weather. Ditto in summer, it occasionally gets up into "air conditioning would be nice" territory but not often enough to make buying the stuff actually worthwhile.

# ? Feb 28, 2018 17:14

big scary monsters: Sep 2, 2011; -~Ｓｋｕｌｌｗａｖｅ~-

Jedit posted:

Well, they are the Prime Minister's Questions. Who is the Speaker to complain if he wants to answer them himself?

Yeah PMQs not PMAs I guess, but under Cameron at least Corbyn would just accept the PM's oily squirming without further comment and move on to the next question. That was really frustrating, so it's nice to see him actually able to go on the attack in response.

# ? Feb 28, 2018 17:16

EmptyVessel: Oct 30, 2012

Borders just inside the Red alert weather report. Loads of snow here - about 9 inches lying not counting drifts and still falling heavily.
My brothers partner is due to give birth th'morn and is already snowed in. Her farmer neighbour has already said he'll drive her out in an appropriate vehicle if needed, but despite lambing being about to start he's not going to 'birth' her. Field next to her house has been used by the rescue helicopter in the past but she's still hoping for a late baby.

# ? Feb 28, 2018 17:19

Cerv: Sep 14, 2004; This is a silly post with little news value.

Spangly A posted:

No no, we're cool, I had honestly forgotten how bad that newsnight cockup was.

I have friends who gave up the idea that their abusers would ever face consequences a long time ago so I'm even more hair trigger than normal about that.

sorry about your friend

can't imagine what that'd feel like

# ? Feb 28, 2018 17:24

coffeetable: Feb 5, 2006; TELL ME AGAIN HOW GREAT BRITAIN WOULD BE IF IT WAS RULED BY THE MERCILESS JACKBOOT OF PRINCE CHARLES

YES I DO TALK TO PLANTS ACTUALLY

Final charitable aside, then I'll shut up: if you make enough to be building savings, consider donating a fixed fraction of your income to charity. Usual recommendation is 10% because it ties into a lot of deeply embedded ideas about tithing, but if you're having a hard time it should be lower and if you're doing well it should be higher. Even 1% would be better than the UK average, which I believe is ~.2%.

Whatever figure you choose - if any - do your research into where's best to donate. Lots of people choose to do a generous thing without thinking about how valuable their generosity is, and it's a damned shame.

# ? Feb 28, 2018 17:25

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

EmptyVessel posted:

Borders just inside the Red alert weather report. Loads of snow here - about 9 inches lying not counting drifts and still falling heavily.
My brothers partner is due to give birth th'morn and is already snowed in. Her farmer neighbour has already said he'll drive her out in an appropriate vehicle if needed, but despite lambing being about to start he's not going to 'birth' her. Field next to her house has been used by the rescue helicopter in the past but she's still hoping for a late baby.

gently caress that imo. I'd be bouncing my way to the hospital in a sheep trailer post haste lest I have to give birth without being drugged into oblivion.

# ? Feb 28, 2018 17:26

sebzilla: Mar 17, 2009; Kid's blasting everything in sight with that new-fangled musket.

Due dates are bullshit, stick at home in the warm because nobody's going to give you space in a hospital on the hunch you might give birth sometime in the next few days.

# ? Feb 28, 2018 17:28

EmptyVessel: Oct 30, 2012

She wants a home birth if possible but the midwives have already told her that she'll get taken to BGH if they say so. Due dates being what they are she'll probably be fine.

# ? Feb 28, 2018 17:47

Firos: Apr 30, 2007; Staying abreast of the latest developments in jam communism

I just realised that Geoff Norcott is actually, unironically, a Tory. Genuinely thought it was satire.

# ? Feb 28, 2018 17:57

Lord of the Llamas: Jul 9, 2002; EULER'VE TO SEE IT VENN SOMEONE CALLS IT THE WRONG THING AND PROVOKES MY WRATH

Firos posted:

I just realised that Geoff Norcott is actually, unironically, a Tory. Genuinely thought it was satire.

Well he is from Surrey, where all 11 MPs are Tories.

Edit: loving hell the smallest Tory majority in Surrey is 26%. :psyduck:

Lord of the Llamas fucked around with this message at 18:02 on Feb 28, 2018

# ? Feb 28, 2018 17:58

Not Operator: Jan 1, 2009; Not A doctor, THE Doctor!

Speaking of, what happened with that conservative comedy hour show that was mentioned earlier this year?

e: Was it actually called Punching Down or did I make that up?

# ? Feb 28, 2018 18:01

Jedit: Dec 10, 2011; Proudly supporting vanilla legends 1994-2014

ScotRail just cancelled all trains from 1800 until tomorrow.

# ? Feb 28, 2018 18:03

TheRat: Aug 30, 2006

Who needs satire when you've got poo poo like this

https://twitter.com/robaeprice/status/968893931239890945

# ? Feb 28, 2018 18:06

Cerv: Sep 14, 2004; This is a silly post with little news value.

once indoors why didn't he change into more appropriate shoes and leave the boots to dry?
i sense this could this be the next empty seats on the train scandal

# ? Feb 28, 2018 18:08

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

Jedit posted:

ScotRail just cancelled all trains from 1800 until tomorrow.

Their decisive action against Boulton and Watt will soon come to an end.

# ? Feb 28, 2018 18:09

Illuyankas: Oct 22, 2010

Firos posted:

I just realised that Geoff Norcott is actually, unironically, a Tory. Genuinely thought it was satire.

I knew that Mash Report sketch he was in was poo poo for a reason*

*besides being excruciatingly poorly written and a non-headline, non-Rachel Parris sketch on the Mash Report

# ? Feb 28, 2018 18:10

Lord of the Llamas: Jul 9, 2002; EULER'VE TO SEE IT VENN SOMEONE CALLS IT THE WRONG THING AND PROVOKES MY WRATH

The Mash Report is just pretty poo poo overall.

# ? Feb 28, 2018 18:11

Tijuana Bibliophile: Dec 30, 2008; Scratchmo

Cerv posted:

once indoors why didn't he change into more appropriate shoes and leave the boots to dry?
i sense this could this be the next empty seats on the train scandal

Corbyn spotted wearing unsafe shoes in winter, "beast of the east" necessitating no apparent changes in wardrobe. NHS warned of potential for falling damage

# ? Feb 28, 2018 18:13

Not Operator: Jan 1, 2009; Not A doctor, THE Doctor!

If it gets any colder, maybe John McDonnell will head to parliament wearing his ushanka.

I know he has one.

# ? Feb 28, 2018 18:16

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# ? May 22, 2024 13:55

Microplastics: Jul 6, 2007; It's what's for dinner.

TheRat posted:

Who needs satire when you've got poo poo like this

https://twitter.com/robaeprice/status/968893931239890945

WHAT NEXT?? WILL HE WEAR DEAD CHILDREN ON HIS FEET?? IT'S A SLIPPERY SLOPE

# ? Feb 28, 2018 18:18

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