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Uncle at Nintendo posted:I just read the new head of the NRA, Oliver North, just blamed mental health medication so you can add that to your list. separately the facts in this sentence are insane but put together they make perfect sense
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May 21, 2018 07:15
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Gov. Greg Abbott suck poo poo from my rear end in a top hat
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May 21, 2018 07:19
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quote:Based on all the research we have done, 97%, according to psychologists and psychiatrists ... of teenagers view video games hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha quote:"You have the necessary exits for fire, of course, but we have to funnel our students into our schools so we can put eyes on them." hahahahahahahahahaha Moridin920 fucked around with this message at 07:22 on May 21, 2018 |
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May 21, 2018 07:19
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Everything is bigger in Texas... Including the URGE TO KILL!!!
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May 21, 2018 07:22
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Moridin920 posted:Gov. Greg Abbott this wasnt our idiot awful governor, this was our idiot awful lt. governor.
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May 21, 2018 07:35
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in response to criticism from leading experts the governor was quoted as saying "ooohhh (chuckles) you'll understand when you're older"
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May 21, 2018 07:42
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If there were less abortions, there would be more targets for a school shooter to hit, makes you think.
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May 21, 2018 08:04
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It's about action economy. If a hundred unaborted babies rush the shooter at once, he'll never shoot them all down before they wrestle him to the ground!
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May 21, 2018 08:16
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Agreed, above posters. We need an army of cyborg aborted fetuses to protect the alive children from the meany faces.
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May 21, 2018 08:35
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sugar free jazz posted:not enough saw style bear traps on peoples heads that trigger when they get outa line or there’s a loud noise That's what cops are for.
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May 21, 2018 08:43
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I pin the blame on the destruction of communities, families, and civil society by things including: the suburbs, the destruction of the labor union, the expectation that people will move every few years for work, the need for both parents to be in the workforce because childrearing doesn't "count", the inability for older family members to help with child care because of the aforementioned need for the nuclear family to move... (five pages later) TLDR: Late stage capitalism fucks a bunch of poo poo up.
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May 21, 2018 08:57
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Who knew a nuclear family would produce some fallout!?
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May 21, 2018 08:59
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This is just my personal opinion, but it seems to me that Texas Lt. Gov Dan Patrick is a very stupid man!
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May 21, 2018 16:51
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Do you think that, if we arm teachers, they should be allowed to pistol-whip students as a disciplinary measure? You know, just want to make sure they have every tool in their toolbox, and all that.
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May 21, 2018 17:03
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When guns are legal for teachers, only criminal teachers won't have guns!
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May 21, 2018 17:08
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those idiots in congress didn't even think to make all the rooms real small and teach the kids CQC
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May 21, 2018 17:12
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has the fact that every spree shooter has his every thought and deed gathered up and put on massive public display for weeks on end been covered
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May 21, 2018 17:19
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These kids are out there playing Doom, Mortal Kombat, and Metroid. They're becoming killing machines, learning how to "power up" their guns, where to find the hidden armor packs in the school, and how to "pwn" their classmates by killing them. I'm a conservative Mom, and I've played all these games to find out what was warping my own son's brain. What I found was shocking, but I also learned how to improve our schools to stop another shooting from happening. 1) More armor for our teachers. Stuff that can repel plasma, color-shifting armor that keeps changing it's weakpoint (From fire to ice to electricity), armor that lets you double jump. 2) STOP HIDING MEAT IN THE WALLS. Kids are making it through the lobby and killing all the lesser teachers, but taking a few hits. Then they just whip the walls, eat a turkey leg, and they're back to 100%. Why are we doing this? 3) The red/yellow/blue/green key situation is out of date. We need to go to a complex series of sliding puzzles to unlock every door. 4) Miniboss teachers in every school. Perhaps a giant head that spits missiles, or a statue filled with bats? Just spitballing here.
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May 21, 2018 17:26
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Uncle at Nintendo posted:I just read the new head of the NRA, Oliver North, just blamed mental health medication so you can add that to your list. tfw you're reading a thread on a comedy website and reality provides the funniest answer.
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May 21, 2018 17:29
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lol but seriously I posted:those idiots in congress didn't even think to make all the rooms real small and teach the kids CQC We must physically and mentally prepare all children to rush an armed assailant and deliver Venom Snake style brutal CQC takedowns which stun the perpetrator in preparation for Fulton extract by law enforcement personnel.
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May 21, 2018 17:52
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A Fancy Hat posted:These kids are out there playing Doom, Mortal Kombat, and Metroid. They're becoming killing machines, learning how to "power up" their guns, where to find the hidden armor packs in the school, and how to "pwn" their classmates by killing them. Hahahahaha
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May 22, 2018 03:44
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Has anyone said the Department of Education?
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May 22, 2018 03:46
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poo poo's been bad at schools since we let Socrates corrupt the youth.
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May 22, 2018 06:34
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If only we had more Real American HeroesTM like this one, there wouldn't be any school shootings. https://twitter.com/ScottMcGrew/status/997484633695469570
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May 22, 2018 07:49
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in texas the guy saying we need more prayers is about as rational as youre gonna get. its all downhill from there
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May 22, 2018 08:10
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Are we sure the prayers are actually making it to the schools?
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May 22, 2018 09:01
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Abortions. Like the other ones have been proven wrong, but abortions??? How is that even relevant in any fashion at all?
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May 22, 2018 09:11
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evilpicard posted:Because the government has not redistributed girlfriends If only something that was legal and regulated these men could take money to and get relief for?
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May 22, 2018 09:25
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evilpicard posted:Because the government has not redistributed girlfriends nice try lil fella, but in the volcano you go
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May 22, 2018 09:27
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1st_Panzer_Div. posted:Abortions. Like the other ones have been proven wrong, but abortions??? How is that even relevant in any fashion at all? One of the aborted fetuses could have grown up to be a Good Guy with a gun idk
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May 22, 2018 10:22
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dee eight posted:I really really want a Longhorns football jersey emblazoned with WHITMAN and #17 (or #16*) This is profoundly retarded and unfunny.
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May 22, 2018 10:34
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So are the ‘armed teachers’ going to wear their gun on a holster or leave it in their desk or something? A few years back in Texas they expanded open carry and so all the yeehaw type idiots put on their hip holsters for a trip to the mall. Mighty quick after that, all the major city police departments were pissed off because there was a rise in gun theft as people had their guns stolen at malls (lol). It’s almost like a cartoon George W Bush style solution isn’t helpful.
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May 22, 2018 13:11
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let's not forget this reason:"The Washington Post posted:Pagourtzis and his friends liked anime anime. loving anime. and i totally called it in the other thread can i be governor of texas now? thanx in advance
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May 22, 2018 13:21
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Help I can't stop thinking 'bout guns when I pray for no more school shootings 
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May 22, 2018 13:45
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America
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May 22, 2018 13:47
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schmuckfeatures posted:let's not forget this reason: lol if you think goku condones school shootings. just lol
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May 22, 2018 13:54
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Loden Taylor posted:#1: Buttafuoco, Buttafuoco, Buttafuoco Please don't do this in a mirror.
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May 22, 2018 14:36
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Where the gently caress are all of these gun-toting idiots when poo poo really does hit the fan? During the Austin, TX shooting a few years back, there was some pro gun rights rally going on a few blocks away right when the shooter started opening fire. A lot of those people were carrying loaded AR15s. Didn't hear about any of them charging toward the hailing gunfire. As soon as the coast is clear they come out of the loving woodwork, but never during a shooting.
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May 22, 2018 14:40
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Captain Beans posted:So are the ‘armed teachers’ going to wear their gun on a holster or leave it in their desk or something? if they’re anything like my history teacher, they’ll be too fat to sit down with it comfortably so the answer is absolutely yes, they will be stolen or hosed with for fun because we treat guns like toys here anyway
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May 22, 2018 14:45
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Careful Drums posted:When I read the door one I was like "okay this is jumping the shark" jumping sharks is actually rason #8 and also why he hates teh ocean
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May 22, 2018 14:47
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