2018 The AFC North: I hate buzzing droning noises they set me off fiercely.

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > The Football Funhouse > 2018 The AFC North: I hate buzzing droning noises they set me off fiercely.

«‹›4 »

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

Bengals will win AFC n

Steelers 3rd in division.

# ¿ Aug 24, 2018 23:44

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ¿ May 9, 2024 22:29

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

MY NIGGA D-LINK posted:

You know neither of these things are happening, son

Both are happening, and Son's my wife.

# ¿ Aug 25, 2018 01:11

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

So I'm going to be on an intercontinental flight w/o internet for the Bengals game. I want y'all to think Bengals updates very hard at me during the game. If I don't pick up anything I'ma assume y'all never loved me.

# ¿ Sep 7, 2018 08:49

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

I'm going to be quite suspicious if I start picking that up at 2:00 Eastern...

# ¿ Sep 7, 2018 14:05

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

So do you just have that in a text file or what? Pretty sure the same thread is where I described the boycot I'm still following. You can take a look if you are interested.

Play posted:

The new helmet rule and the fact that players can be ejected, fined, suspended etc. for hits like he described is kind of like making personal fouls reviewable.

Eh, we'll see how they enforce it, but I am optimistic about the rule as written. Having the plays qualify for review would keep people more honest, but it does seem to have caused a greater focus on form tackling.

# ¿ Sep 8, 2018 00:38

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

# ¿ Sep 9, 2018 22:21

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA

# ¿ Sep 9, 2018 22:31

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

Fifty Three posted:

0-0-16 Is Real

But what would the Browns record be?

# ¿ Sep 11, 2018 18:04

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

Loooooooooool

# ¿ Sep 16, 2018 22:33

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

Steelers will not be in the playoffs.

# ¿ Sep 21, 2018 00:25

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

Sam darnold is first-year Andy Dalton

# ¿ Sep 21, 2018 23:15

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

I bet if I photoswapped Joe's face w any one of his kids no one would notice.

# ¿ Sep 29, 2018 12:10

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

Let's go the loving Ravens tonight.

# ¿ Oct 1, 2018 00:47

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

Some AFC South person coming in and oppressing our culture.

Next thing you know he'll be banning people for posting &e as a Rivals pun.

# ¿ Oct 1, 2018 01:26

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

defaultluser posted:

I know I' asking too much here from the Professional Worrier (TM), but you should stop worrying about the Bengals. Almost every year they win the division is because they SWEPT the division, and then stumble their way through four-five other close games with lovely teams.

Marvin Lewis is a one-trick pony, with absolutely no flexibility. It's the reason he hasn't won a single playoff game in fifteen years. even though he's has seven trips with two different quarterbacks.

He builds his teams to beat the AFC North, nothing more.

Also, he''s not sweeping the north this year. Both we a Cicy will be 5-1 at the end of he season. Joe was rusty after having a easy first game, and Green got THREE TDs because Jimmy Smith earned himself a 4-game vacation. Both of he above will be solved by Next Week.

The bengals last swept the North in 2009. Pretty sure that was the first time too. The Bengals absolutely have the Ravens number. Thing is, even our bad years we split y'all, so I don't blame a Ravens fan for thinking we roll the division every other year.

# ¿ Oct 2, 2018 14:59

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

The Bengals will 100% lose to the Jags but the Jags likely will have a bye.

The Jaguars are our worst match up in the league. We lose that game 11 times out of 10 barring massive catastrophic injury to like the entire Jags D.

# ¿ Oct 2, 2018 16:06

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

If the Bengals beat the Ravens in the playoffs I will laugh and laugh and laugh and laugh and laugh.

I may even take oberst off ignore long enough to mock him.

# ¿ Oct 2, 2018 23:43

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

I bought his severed foot as a souvenir.

# ¿ Oct 2, 2018 23:55

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

Everyone knows that the Bengals ever finally win a playoff game the world is going to end in a beautiful Singularity of Bengals wins.

Just wins everywhere wins all the time

# ¿ Oct 3, 2018 00:40

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

My cousin who just got a licence to practice law was not alive the last time the Bengals won a playoff game.

# ¿ Oct 3, 2018 01:40

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

Bengals always get Ravens/steelers week 17 and they will only start giving us Browns when they are good and Pit is a cellar dweller.

# ¿ Oct 3, 2018 15:08

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

Lol.

By the way thanks to tiebreakers Steelers are in the basement

# ¿ Oct 7, 2018 21:51

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

MY NIGGA D-LINK posted:

Until next week when you take your annual shithousing in Paul Brown

What Phantom injury do you think Ben Roethlisberger will claim when the Steelers lose by more than two scores next week?

# ¿ Oct 7, 2018 22:56

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

I'm on the wall pretty hard if you think shift from 1984 to 2004 applies in the modern NFL.

# ¿ Oct 7, 2018 23:08

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

MY NIGGA D-LINK posted:

Hahaha you win like 10 games per season every other year with the QB who is the measuring stick for league average

I don't know how to tell you this, but it's not 2012 anymore. Also David Bowie's dead and Donald Trump is president.

# ¿ Oct 7, 2018 23:46

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

Don't doxx me

# ¿ Oct 8, 2018 00:54

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

Interpreting Bengals fan optimism as 100% sincere is like thinking Blackadder is a documentary.

# ¿ Oct 10, 2018 00:01

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

Flikken posted:

He literally swore off the Browns for drafting 2 "Midgets" in the first round. His Words.

I'm super hyped about this team.

What's Marvin Lewis like in person?

# ¿ Oct 21, 2018 00:01

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

I think I'm either 9-7 or 8-8. Marv era it'd be 5-2 or so. Best games were 03 vs Chiefs and 14 vs Denver.

0-2 in playoffs though.

# ¿ Oct 21, 2018 01:10

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

That Weeden game was loving infuriating.

That was back when I was teaching in Korea and I was watching the 4th quarter in the teacher's office. This really neurotic third grader who always got on my nerves was in the office and asking me questions about the game. And every time anything that went against the Bengals happened he would go "oooohhhhhhh nnnnoooooooooo" and I just wanted to shake him.

Eifert Posting fucked around with this message at 01:43 on Oct 21, 2018

# ¿ Oct 21, 2018 01:37

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

Big Ol Marsh Pussy posted:

i was going to do a troll where i said the issue with the bengals is that the snaps that are longer than regular snaps are bad and that would fix the team by drafting a long snapper but then i remembered that was genuinely the case 10 years ago.

If I ever hear you talking poo poo about Clark Harris I'm going to find out where you live and take a dump on your front lawn.

Clark Harris MVP

# ¿ Oct 31, 2018 23:23

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

Kawalimus posted:

Le conte

Wow... Language dude.

# ¿ Nov 1, 2018 00:18

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

Ross is a head case. When he's healthy he gives up on routes and he seems to take himself out of games. Our offence can limp along minus AJ or minus Eifert, but not both.

So frustrating that of the past 3 years the only one we have significant injury issues is the only one with an otherwise competitive roster. They can still make the postseason, but they likely wouldn't be favored over anyone and the attrition can't get any worse.

Seems like 2014 all over again, only in 14 the '10 and '11 draft classes we've built the roster on was entering its prime, not exiting.

# ¿ Nov 6, 2018 13:20

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

A big flaming stink posted:

marvin lewis is a marginally more successful version of rex ryan.

Rex took Sanchise to two championship games.

# ¿ Nov 8, 2018 13:03

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

The Bengals special teams have been a difference-maker when it comes to kick coverage.

# ¿ Nov 18, 2018 21:08

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

Rip andey.

The rookie center has one bad snap in a game, and murders the QB. Lol.

# ¿ Nov 27, 2018 00:20

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

Hi uh I am really sick of players getting hurt welp that's my story.

# ¿ Dec 4, 2018 03:04

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

Oberst posted:

Tis better to have loved and lost than to have ever been from ohio

The Baltimore Ravens are literally from Ohio.

# ¿ Dec 9, 2018 23:41

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

I would take Joe Flacco as a backup for Andy Dalton.

# ¿ Dec 14, 2018 23:49

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ¿ May 9, 2024 22:29

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

sharknado slashfic posted:

If he's feeling upset he should buy some McNuggets those always used to cheer him up.

# ¿ Dec 16, 2018 03:50

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > The Football Funhouse > 2018 The AFC North: I hate buzzing droning noises they set me off fiercely.

«‹›4 »