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My idiot Navy chief husband decided to slap our 14 year old son hard enough to bust his bottom lip and bruise around both nostrils for glaring. Right after he threatened to do it again if our son looked at him like that again. I reported him to the Navy and CPS. I also got a protection order for my son. I am trying to find what resources are available to help protect my son from any more abuse.
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Oct 7, 2018 03:15
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| # ? May 4, 2024 22:45 |
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Have you contacted the police/NCIS? This is also a good time to get a lawyer, and base legal may help with that. You're going to need representation to help you file a restraining order or separation documents if need be.
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Oct 7, 2018 03:32
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Medinna posted:My idiot Navy chief husband decided to slap our 14 year old son hard enough to bust his bottom lip and bruise around both nostrils for glaring. Right after he threatened to do it again if our son looked at him like that again. I reported him to the Navy and CPS. I also got a protection order for my son. I am trying to find what resources are available to help protect my son from any more abuse. Report to someone in his chain of command, but at least a few levels above him. Get a restraining order.
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Oct 7, 2018 03:34
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Also, do you have someplace to stay that's not co-located with him? If not, legal may help you to compel him to leave your home.
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Oct 7, 2018 03:35
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Yeah just go through the channels of Police/NCIS/Restraining orders. They take things seriously as long as you press the issue. Chiefs tend to circle the wagon so just elevate your complaint if you get push back and they try to stone wall you. Talk to the ombudsman and the CO, if you don't see results quick go to the squadron then fleet level.
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Oct 7, 2018 03:36
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Take your son to the Naval Hospital for treatment. Get it documented and let them know it was from abuse.
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Oct 7, 2018 03:48
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Just call the quarterdeck of the ship/base and talk to the command duty officer. They won't circle the wagons. The whole command will scramble to make sure everyone who needs to know does, get the sitrep out and start their own investigation. This is assuming this hasn't already happened.
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Oct 7, 2018 04:09
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Also no need to post details but if you could pop back and say you're OK or need more help at some point that would be great 
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Oct 7, 2018 04:25
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I took him to medical the morning after. The main problem facing me is how to get possession of the house or find alternative living arrangements. Since my son is a minor and the only one abused, the courts can not give him possession of the house. I currently have a military protective order that prevents my husband from returning home till the end of the month. I also have a preliminary protective order. CPS is investigating. The only money I have available is my GI Bill. My husband controls all the other money.
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Oct 7, 2018 14:38
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Call a family lawyer. Not legal services. An actual family lawyer.
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Oct 7, 2018 14:46
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Medinna posted:I took him to medical the morning after. The main problem facing me is how to get possession of the house or find alternative living arrangements. Since my son is a minor and the only one abused, the courts can not give him possession of the house. I currently have a military protective order that prevents my husband from returning home till the end of the month. I also have a preliminary protective order. CPS is investigating. The only money I have available is my GI Bill. My husband controls all the other money. What state are you in? I can try to direct you to some legal resources if I know of any. Make sure you and your kid are safe. That's priority #1. All of the reporting people recommend is correct, as well. Ensure his command knows, that your son is treated and documented the treatment as abuse. It looks like you're probably going towards divorce, and you need to set yourself up as best as possible so that you're not completely left out in the cold.
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Oct 7, 2018 15:00
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Also as long as you're married your husband cannot withhold money from you. This is where base legal can be of assistance. Dependent support is something he's required to provide until there's a court order saying otherwise. The RLSO will tally up what he owes you each month and notify the command. Frankly it's another charge his child beating rear end will not get out of if he decides to be a dick and not support his dependents. The CO will not gently caress around with this.
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Oct 7, 2018 15:26
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Just remember that the Navy will do everything they're required to do for this issue. The rest is a civil matter and you need a lawyer. It may cost a bit, but lawyers will work with you. Most clients can't just pony up all the legal fees at once.
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Oct 7, 2018 15:30
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We are in Virginia and own the house.
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Oct 7, 2018 17:59
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I can't help you there, but King of Bees is right - you need a family lawyer asap. There should be plenty around that understand all the rules and laws regarding military divorce and can also help with keeping you and your kid safe.
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Oct 7, 2018 18:23
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Not constructive help in any way, but: gently caress that rear end in a top hat.
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Oct 7, 2018 18:26
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Echoing family lawyer. I guarantee a 30 minute (usually free!) introductory consultation call will clear up so many things for you. In most cases like this that I've seen, the husband has filled up the wife's head with a bunch of BS about how divorces go down, so it looks really unattractive. The truth is, generally speaking, all the judges want is whatever is least disturbing to the kids. This means you will get to stay in the house (because this is what your kids are used to). It will be OK. Talk to a family lawyer. Talk to three. Like I said, nearly all will do a free introductory consultation. Each attorney will bring a different perspective. Based on your conversation with them, you can pick which is the best fit for your family.
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Oct 7, 2018 18:32
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| # ? May 4, 2024 22:45 |
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Ensure base police and NCIS are involved and press the issue. Do not think the command will do the right thing. We have had count on two hands domestic incidents at my command in my time and I can not think of one that ended with repercussions that were broadcast to the personnel, always "this happened, don't do it" and never hearing about it again til the next time we are told "don't do that". Utilize those law enforcement resources to ensure your safety and that the Navy doesn't gently caress this up, please.
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Oct 7, 2018 21:54
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