(Thread IKs:
Josherino)
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I've been considering going to a therapist soon if things don't get better for me. For now, I've been getting by with CBT and self-helped resources that were provided by my old therapist. I started seeing him during my sophomore year of college and he helped out immensely. Interestingly enough, after I had graduated, he told me that I could still be able to have sessions with him since he had been planning on starting his own practice back in January, but it's May now and I still haven't been able to contact him. I imagine his plans ended up changing, but if I do decide to see a new therapist, I have no idea how to find a new one. I know services like Betterhelp exist but I've heard mixed reviews about them.
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May 2, 2022 22:02
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| # ¿ May 11, 2024 07:06 |
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Doctor posted:my long-term therapist just moved out of province because she can no longer afford to live in BC anymore, so, lol, lmao.
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May 6, 2022 00:30
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AceOfFlames posted:I am slowly starting to exercise more though. Hope it helps. As undisciplined as I am, I think focusing on self improvement and tuning out the noise of the world is the best approach. As cliché as it sounds, anyone else going through the same try to focus on something you can be proud of, no matter how small it is, and try to keep going.
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May 9, 2022 02:34
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I just realized that last week marks the one year anniversary of my mental breakdown from work lol, which prompted me to quit. My professional life has been a disaster since then. Honestly, the only reasons why I haven't completely lost it mentally are that my social life is decent and my physical health is doing well.
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Jun 29, 2022 18:02
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I'm finding it so mentally difficult to resume my job search. I've been spending the past TWO MONTHS preparing for a new job - did interviews, took and aced preliminary exams, etc. The recruiter even offered me the position and was ready to welcome me to the team and then all of a sudden they suddenly forgot to tell me that it wasn't remote and they weren't hiring from my location, so they withdrew the offer. I literally told them first thing where I was living so I assumed that it was either remote or that they would allow me time to relocate. I know it's just a complete misunderstanding but I'm so frustrated and I'm so anxious and depressed to start the job search again. I had been applying to jobs since the start of March and I'm feeling so overwhelmed by the constant cycle of applying to jobs and then not getting them. But this was especially bad since I did have the offer lined up, only for it to be rescinded in the end. I'm finding it hard to have the energy to work on job applications again. I've been doing volunteer work on the side since spring to keep myself preoccupied and to put things on my resume but I still hope to get a job soon so I can actually earn income and find more purpose with what I want to do with my life. This was a bit of a venty post, but it makes me feel a little better to let it all out. I hope everyone else is doing okay.
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Jul 7, 2022 00:34
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Jorge Bell posted:StashAugustine I had some similar issues when I was less confident in myself. I think it's something that naturally fades a little with age and accomplishment, that's why old guys in gyms are okay walking around with their balls out. It took some close friendships for me to get told the good things about myself and actually believe them though, so if your peer group isn't able to do that for you a group situation might be able to. Moving to a shithole could also help here, I am extremely confident in the tiny trash town I live in but when I visit cities like Los Angeles I still do feel very small. YMMV.
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Jul 9, 2022 01:40
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Moving from the city to the countryside has been mixed for me, it was very rough at first but there are some things that I'm learning to appreciate about living in a rural area. I've been going out in nature more so I appreciate having a yard to garden in. I love that there are hiking spots close by too. I definitely prefer the city though and I do want to eventually move back to the city once I'm financially and mentally prepared to. It sucks having zero public transportation here and no one my age around me (I'm still in my early twenties).
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Jul 11, 2022 07:17
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That squirrel pic is really adorable. One of my favorite parts of my afternoon run is just taking the time to appreciate the nature around you.Tulip posted:on urban living, literally just ran across this quote by Claude Fisher (sociologist of urban life) that I figured I should share: I agree with this a lot. Ever since I moved out of the city, I've reflected there and noticed that there are so many things I took for granted while I lived in Los Angeles. I wish I took the time more to really enjoy and explore the city when I lived there.
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Jul 11, 2022 23:58
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Gene Hackman Fan posted:job hunting is still an ongoing thing. family has been helpful, but it's been the kind of helpful that borders on fuckin infuriating especially considering most of the help has been advice that was insulting before existence of the internet, now it's shorthand for "i have no loving idea how the job market works but obviously you're doing something wrong." This is almost exactly what I've been going through. The job search in itself is already dreadful, but combine that with a crappy family situation and you have a recipe for disaster.
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Jul 13, 2022 23:52
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Flora Finching posted:Man I am feeling that poo poo. My career ended due to disability so at least I have a job counselor offering helpful advice like 'walk in to businesses by your house and ask if they're hiring' and 'you should make a LinkedIn account' and 'you should make an Instagram account'. Personally, it's been helpful for me to sign up on job alerts on sites like Idealist and Indeed. Ever since my job offer got rescinded two weeks ago, it's been really rough getting back into the job hunt but even just looking at these job alerts helps reassure me that I'm at least trying. I also do some volunteer work on the side and mentally it's helped a bit. Sure it's not paid but it helps keep me busy, otherwise I'd be moping in my bedroom all day depressed while playing video games. I've also been focusing some time on hobbies like gardening and working out.
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Jul 14, 2022 04:02
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I've been thinking about changing how I journal tbh. I typically just log how my day is going on Daylio, it's basically an app where you track your moods and activities. It's effective in that it helps me detect what time of days I feel worst and which activities are best for my mental health, but I've wondered if it's self-defeating whenever I label a day as "bad" as it sometimes causes me to ruminate more on my thoughts. I will say though that venting on the Internet kinda works, if that counts as journalling lol.
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Jul 28, 2022 01:46
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References are easily my least favorite part of job applications. Such a waste of time and it always gives me unnecessary anxiety.
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Aug 1, 2022 19:20
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Tulip posted:I...think I need to log off for a bit. Absolute minimum from Twitter, possibly from other sources as well. I want to be a good person, and I know that anybody who is even mildly versed in sophistry can make any action sound evil, and I know that people are just bored and playing a game when they talk about how feeding people is actually no morally better than bombing a village, but it still gets under my skin and I feel bad that I am not capable of dedicating 25 hours a day to perfectly selfless actions. As if there is such a thing as perfectly selfless action. I uninstalled Twitter from my phone and it's done wonders for my mental health (now I just check it once a day on my computer). I believe most people just go to Twitter to vent their frustrations about the world after a long work/school day and that's why it's such a toxic place. Also I kinda just stopped following heated topics so now all my Twitter algorithm gives me are The Boys memes, which I thoroughly enjoy.
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Aug 3, 2022 22:36
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I recently got a job offer from a university. It feels good to finally have an offer on the table, but I've been stressed figuring out relocation and whatnot. Luckily, the start date is flexible, which prevents me from catastrophizing over the apartment hunt. Also, thank you to the people on this forum who suggested Psychology Today's search engine as a way to find a therapist! One of my friends was having difficulty finding one and kept getting ghosted by different counseling centers, but I suggested it to him and he was able to find a therapist right away.
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Aug 27, 2022 01:45
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I'm back. I was posting here for a little bit during the spring/summer. How is everyone? I hope everyone is doing okay. I started my first full-time job in October and it's been a bunch of highs and lows for me. At first, it was going great. I felt proud of myself for finally getting a job, moving into my own place, etc. But recently, now that everything's settling in, I'm starting to reflect already on whether or not I'm actually enjoying this job and how long I actually want to stay. It's an administrative assistant type of role, and I feel like I'm being micromanaged a lot, and I notice that my anxiety's been relapsing again because I'm constantly scared of doing mistakes at work and not completing tasks on time. I also feel like there's little room for me to grow and explore my interests. I had a meeting the other week with my supervisor where I was helping her recruit a new cohort, and she made a comment about how we would be working with the cohort for the "next three years of our lives," and it gave me a slight panic attack at the possibility of working at this same place for that long. I just graduated college in 2021 and I really want to spend my twenties exploring my interests and finding out what I want to do, but this job feels so mundane and lifeless. On one hand, I still appreciate the financial security of the job and being able to live on my own, but on the other hand I'm already having so much second thoughts about this job and it's only been two months.
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Dec 17, 2022 10:41
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Thanks for the advice everyone. I'll give the job a bit more time to see how things go. I think I'm also scared about going back to my previous situation (being unemployed in itself is also a very stressful process), but I'll give myself more time to think. Even if I do end up unemployed again I decided that I'll do some volunteer work or something to keep myself preoccupied while job hunting.StashAugustine posted:I still feel pretty inexperienced 2 years in, but I've also been stuck on night shift by myself. Just got moved to 10am-7pm so I should have more opportunity to work with people, we'll see how that works out. At least I can actually go out at nights
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Dec 18, 2022 07:14
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I hope everyone has been having a wonderful holiday season. Mine's been alright so far. My family situation isn't the best but it still feels nice to be at home and away from work. I've been reflecting a lot lately on my resolutions next year and I'm hoping to get back into my hobbies for 2023. I stopped gardening after moving to the city but I'm thinking of at least purchasing a few houseplants or getting an Aerogarden since they were really helpful for helping manage my anxieties and depression last year. I'm also hoping to be more social more. I talked to some old friends over the weekend and it made me realize how much I missed them.
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Dec 26, 2022 19:44
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cash crab posted:idk about anyone else but when i start feeling really low for a while nothing makes me wanna live more than just starting a stupid TV and snacks routine until i have the energy to get out of my funk. nothing wrong with it. supernatural is very stupid and a great suggestion. i'm also a Bad Eater so trying add more snacks is always good for me. i like the Good Place, i find it very affirming and uplifting personally. I love The Good Place a lot. I started watching it in early 2019 when I was going through my first big battle with depression and it helped me out a lot. It's probably my favorite TV show of all time. I haven't watched too many shows this year. But one of my friends recommended me Frasier and I watch a couple episodes each night whenever I have time. It's a very good comfort show.
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Dec 28, 2022 02:09
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My mental health would be so much better if my state had right to disconnect laws.
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Jan 20, 2023 09:14
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How do people find the energy to go to work while they're depressed, especially when that job is the reason why they're so depressed?
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Jan 31, 2023 21:38
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Tungsten posted:and oh my god the tone-deaf reveries about "diversity, equity, and inclusion" while all the members of minority groups scramble for survival and leave in droves and the network of old white men at the core of the company entrench themselves in their houses in the suburbs. I didn't learn to reflexively hate liberal platitudes until sitting through enough HR presentations at that place. You took the words right out of my mouth. I work as a program assistant at a university. My workplace makes a huge deal about diversity, but most of its leadership consists of white people while the support staff is almost entirely POC. The higher ups have a huge savior complex and host biweekly "White Antiracist Affinity Groups" but are always condescending and patronizing toward my coworkers and me. We have a social justice credentialing program that is headed by a white woman and all but one of its instructors are white lol. I could write an entire essay about all the things that seem unsettling at my workplace regarding racial equity. Sometimes I don't know if it's just my anxiety exaggerating things but there are a bunch of times where I feel uncomfortable around my supervisors and feel like I'm in Get Out. Witeldram has issued a correction as of 23:37 on Feb 1, 2023 |
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Feb 1, 2023 23:34
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My therapist in college warned me a bit about prayer but for a different reason. He basically said that praying can cause someone to ruminate a lot and therefore make their anxiety worse.
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Feb 2, 2023 05:07
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mawarannahr posted:i think prayer-like meditation can be useful even as a materialist as kind of a way for recognizing goals, desires, and weaknesses. there is a small amount of evidence to suggest they help cement these things at a different level neurally by combination of focus, meditation, and physical action; like, if it makes sense, it can help you accomplish things and solve problems by processing them in a way you don't usually do. no supernatural belief necessary. This makes sense. Prayer and mindfulness cause me to dwell a lot more in negative thoughts, but I can see how it can give other people more clarity and peace of mind. Small victory today? I found out today that my university provides wellness counseling for its employees, so I was able to schedule an appointment tomorrow afternoon because my job is mentally killing me. This is my first counseling appointment since summer 2021, and the first counselor I'm seeing since college.
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Feb 2, 2023 20:37
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My therapy session on Friday went pretty well. I'm still anxious and catastrophizing about a lot of things, but I know therapy isn't an immediate solution to my problems but a stepping stone to feeling better. Every time I start a therapy session I'm always worried that I won't be able to unpack everything and explain my problems thoroughly, but I think my therapist understood my work and housing situation very well, especially for a first session. All in all just a productive session and I'm already looking forward to my next session this Friday. It's a nice change to have weekly sessions. I'm not used to this since my counseling center in my undergrad used to be so under capacity that I could only see my therapist once a month lol
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Feb 5, 2023 11:04
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StashAugustine posted:the good news is I've been feeling a lot better this week! The bad news is that actually having nonzero energy in the evenings means I'm not getting to bed when I'd like to That's great! It feels good finally having the energy to do stuff and have pleasure in things again. Holy crap, there's been a bit of a fallout in the university I work at regarding a racial incident that happened last year. Apparently someone called the campus police on a Latino student last year because he wasn't wearing a mask. The university tried to cover up the incident (I myself didn't know about it until yesterday) but it was brought to light again last week, and since then there's been 10+ PhD students speaking up about the toxic climate of the school, speaking about how inauthentic it is regarding racial justice, the hypocrisy of a lot of the faculty/staff, etc. There's still a lot to take in still but it kinda made me realize that I'm not so alone in my reservations regarding the workplace. There's a lot of times I feel uncomfortable here with how the university approaches diversity and equity (I felt like it had an issue with performative activism), but I always assumed it was just my anxiety exaggerating things.
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Feb 15, 2023 19:18
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Cuttlefush posted:this is every university, especially at the graduate/working level. except for a few rare departments/people. hell, the general university diversity/equity or whatever department or groups could be fine but they will usually not be able to do poo poo about the actual departments and advisors who actually determine what happens to the graduate students. most phd programs are pure old timey apprenticeships and there's only so much a well-meaning beaurocracy could do to intervene if your advisor turns out to be a bastard. you can probably trust your gut on things (and talk to those phd students if you have any doubts). Exactly. I've heard horror stories about academia as an undergrad, but it feels surreal witnessing it in-person. To be honest, I'm afraid of speaking up myself. I'm not even a PhD student, just an administrative assistant for the professors so I'm at the very bottom of the totem pole. I've always felt an unhealthy power dynamic between the professors and me. So far, the only people who have spoken up are the grad students, but if some of the other staff members take action I might do it as well. But I'm definitely going to consider talking to the PhD students because this whole incident has made me realize that I'm not alone.
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Feb 15, 2023 22:08
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I find it helpful that this thread is generally so much more chill and friendly compared to the rest of the site lol.
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Feb 16, 2023 18:20
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Bad day at work again! At least it's a three-day weekend. 
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Feb 17, 2023 19:07
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Consummate Professional posted:my awesome psych quit today My therapist in undergrad used to work for the VA and it seemed like a very stressful place to work at.
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Feb 18, 2023 20:37
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I don’t blame him, the VA must suck rear end to work for
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Gave my two weeks' notice to my operations manager today. She seemed understanding and supportive of my decision, but I'm deathly anxious of telling my other two supervisors about it, especially given that they're kinda the reason why the job got toxic for my mental health.
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Feb 22, 2023 06:38
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Flipswitch posted:I had my first counselling session yesterday and I have never been able to open up like that before. It's left me so raw and just gaping for two days now. Congrats on your first therapy session! The first one is always the hardest imo, there's a lot to unload and reveal to someone you had never met before, and it can be an overwhelming feeling. It gets better as you get to know your therapist more.
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Feb 23, 2023 21:43
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I gave my two weeks' notice recently and overall I feel pretty good about it. Of course, there's still anxiety about what happens next but I'm glad I made this decision. Being an administrative assistant sucks (especially in the type of environment I was in) and I'm glad I no longer have to do it anymore.Jorge Bell posted:Seriously, developing a peer group is pretty essential. I've met people through local improv classes and D&D, have online people via a MUD I played and then worked on a little bit, etc. Social hobbies are a great way to expand your world so that it includes other people! I second this. Developing healthy social relationships did wonders for my mental health. Back in college, I befriended a local Pokémon GO raid group that I've kept in touch with since. One of my goals this year is to be back in these types of circles since I had neglected them since the start of the pandemic.
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Mar 5, 2023 01:48
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America Inc. posted:It's funny but all of the men on my dad's side of the family wind up living with their parents. My dad left LA to live with grandpa after his relationship with his gf didn't work out, and my dead gay uncle moved back after failing in his career as a journalist. My other uncle didn't even try moving out and he's in his 40s. Failsons all of them. This is my fear tbh. My older sister has fully moved out and my younger sister will likely move out once she moves out or attends grad school. I was planning on moving overseas but didn't due to COVID and mental health stuff, and I briefly moved out for one job but moved back in because it didn't work out (though I'm happy with this decision because I hated that job). I'm sure I can eventually make it out, I just don't know when. It's especially hard when everyone around you seems to be moving about while you're living with parents.
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Jun 7, 2023 09:01
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America Inc. posted:Does anyone know how I can dream more often? I never dream nowadays, but I daydream a lot. In a weird way the Internet is also like dreaming. Keep a dream journal. Every since I started using one, I've not only started dreaming more, but my dreams have become more vivid. I use an app called Lucid and log my dreams first thing in the morning.
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Jun 16, 2023 04:51
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I've noticed recently that I started developing this negative habit where, whenever something good happens to a friend or family (new job, travel, graduate, etc.) I can't help but feel jealous and negative. I'm still happy about their accomplishment but can't help but compare myself to them and I feel bad thinking this way.
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Jun 16, 2023 04:53
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I feel like I have the opposite of seasonal depression sometimes, I'm happy in the winter but depressed in the summer. I love the winter because I enjoy the cold weather and the holidays, but during the summer I always feel depressed as everyone else around me seems to be travelling and enjoying their summer while I'm practically doing nothing.
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Jun 25, 2023 23:58
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Anyone know how to deal with job search stress? I'm planning on applying to jobs again but I hate the cycle of anxiety and depression: anxiety from applying to jobs, and depression when things don't work out. I'm still living financially comfortable despite being unemployed, but I do want to get a job soon. I've also done some volunteer work and it's added some structure to my weekly routine, but it still feels different from having an actual job.
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Jun 29, 2023 03:00
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StashAugustine posted:I do have to say that personally it's been helpful for me to occasionally refer back to my posts here in lieu of actually keeping a journal. Not entirely opposed to hiding it if other people would prefer it, but I'd like to see it not get completely hidden imo
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Jun 30, 2023 02:31
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I am (finally!) going to try getting my driver's license. It's something that I've been putting off, not because I had fortunately been living in walkable cities for most of my adulthood but also because of test and driving anxiety. I'm still really anxious about this but it's about time I start working toward my license again.
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Jul 27, 2023 09:47
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| # ¿ May 11, 2024 07:06 |
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At the start of every month, my anxiety always seems to relapse. I reflect a lot on the month ahead and get overwhelmed with what I do, and I always feel like I'm not doing as much progress on the job search as I should be (which contributes to stress/self-hate). I've finally started working on getting my license again (haven't done anything since before the pandemic), and as proud as I am about finally taking this step, it's also caused me a lot of anxiety.
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Sep 4, 2023 02:00
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