|
|
Let's all read more books! Post short passages of your favorite literature here, but give it a little BYOB spin. Starting with A Feast for Crows by still unknown author GRRM, chapter the The night was unseasonably cool, even for autumn. A brisk wet wind was wirling down the alleys, stirring up the day's dust. A north wind, and full of chill. Ser Arys Oakheart pulled up his hood to cover his face. It would not do for him to be recognized, despite his glowing red eyes. A fortnight past, a trader had been caught smoking something in the shadow city, a harmless man who'd come to Dorne for fruit and found a chill place to smoke instead. His only crime was being from King's Landing, as weed is illegal there. If only he had posted more.
|
#
?
Mar 18, 2019 14:26
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 4, 2024 16:08 |
|
|
|
Ishmael claims to be a porpoise. Some years ago- never mind how long precisely- having little or no money in my purse, and nothing particular to interest me in GBS, I thought I would  a little and see the blue part of the forum. It is a way I have of driving off the spleen and regulating the circulation. Whenever I find myself growing grim about the mouth; whenever it is a damp, drizzly November in my soul; whenever I find myself involuntarily pausing before coupon books, and bringing up the rear of every deal I meet; and especially whenever my hypos get such an upper hand of me, that it requires a strong moral principle to prevent me from deliberately shitposting into the street, and methodically trolling people's hats off- then, I account it high time to chill as soon as I can. This is my substitute for pistol and ball. With a philosophical flourish Cato autobans; I quietly take to the chill. There is nothing surprising in this. If they but knew it, almost all men in their degree, some time or other, cherish very nearly the same feelings towards Comic Sans with me.
|
|
#
?
Mar 18, 2019 21:45
|
|
|
|
a yobber in king arthur's court As we approached each other, I saw that he wore a plumed helmet, and seemed to be otherwise clothed in steel, but bore a curious addition also--a stiff square garment like a herald's tabard. However, I had to smile at my own forgetfulness when I got nearer and read this sign on his tabard: "They're going to start selling weed at Whole Foods"
|
|
#
?
Mar 18, 2019 23:15
|
|
|
|
BYOB's Fortress "Sir!" Becker held up both hands urgently signaling truce. "I'm not interested in your column; I'm from the Coupons & Deals Consulate. I'm here to make sure you're okay! Suddenly there was a dead quiet in the chill room. The old yobber looked up from his bed and eyed the intruder suspiciously. Becker ventured on in almost a whisper. "I'm here to see if I can chill with you, guys. Like bring you a couple of good coupons maybe." After a long pause, the old yobber spoke. "There is nothing wrong in paying hard working people the price they earned, sir. Coupons undermine this concept for personal gain. It is not okay." It was as if a giant bubble had burst for Becker. He settled slowly back down onto his mountain of pillows. He looked heartbroken. "I.. I know. I felt like it before but I didn't think anyone would share this thought. I dedicated my life to coupons. What shall I do know?" The old yobber looked at him closely and offered his hand as a sign of peace. "BYOB is a place to have fun and enjoy your time. Let's start with that."
|
|
#
?
Mar 19, 2019 03:06
|
|
|
Sylvia Plathetic posted:It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a good boy in possession of a fluffy tummy, must be in want of belly rubs. Yes he must. Yes he must!
|
|
#
?
Mar 19, 2019 22:07
|
|
|
Old Yeller, afflicted with rabies, couldn't understand what was happening to him. Papa levelled the gun at him, uncertainty crossing the features of his face, conflicting with the determination he knew he needed to complete his grim task. "Papa" a small voice said behind him "there's another way." Papa slowly lowered his gun and turned to his son, who was standing behind him with a mysterious object slowly pulsing a brilliant blue light in his hand. Travis carefully aimed the Wand he held in his right hand at the poor, suffering dog. "I wish Old Yeller to be in the best health of his life!" he shouted, his voice a clear hammer ringing against the harsh reality that was their world. A silvery blue stream of light flowed from the Wand out at the dog, and suddenly- in a brilliant flash of light- the old dog was replaced by a young puppy! Puppy Yeller was raised with the same litter of puppies he himself had sired with Lisabeth's dog, Miss Priss. Travis and Lisabeth would grow up and together with Young Yeller and of course, a Magic Wand- they would become wise rulers of a foolish world. And they lived happily ever after! |
|
#
?
Mar 20, 2019 13:21
|
|
|
|
teh idiot
|
|
#
?
Mar 20, 2019 22:22
|
|
|
Sartre's No Exit but everyone has a good time and no one wants to leave the party
https://i.imgur.com/QKTkerO.mp4 |
|
#
?
Mar 20, 2019 22:59
|
|
|
|
Splatmaster posted:Sartre's No Exit but everyone has a good time and no one wants to leave the party
|
|
#
?
Mar 21, 2019 00:46
|
|
|
|
This was my winter/spring reading list and now I'm writing my own book Lanark by Alisdair Gray Shikasta: Re, Colonized Planet 5 by Doris Lessing The Glass Bead Game by Herman Hesse White Teeth by Zadie Smith b/c she's namedropped in a rap song I like ("spit it like Zadie Smith with a Jay-Z lisp") Hocus Pocus by Vonnegut The Jungle by Sinclair And before that I read The Baron in the Trees by Calvino and before that Colorless Tsukuru Tazaki by Murakami and then later this year I'm going to read the Hagakure which was just a really weird progression because at the end of Baron in the Trees I found a rap song w/ the line "I've never read the Hagakure / think you'd loan me a copy? / I'm still stuck on Murakami / Calvino looming" And I read parts of Being and Nothingness by Sartre too I guess also just for better comprehension of rap songs |
|
#
?
Mar 21, 2019 02:25
|
|
|
|
Steps to getting in to reading deep-rear end books: fall in love w/ the rapper milo study his lyrics intently set out to decipher them |
|
#
?
Mar 21, 2019 02:36
|
|
|
|
Oh sorry I thought this was a realpost thread I think it was Ray Bradbury who said it's impossible to write 23 bad posts in a row |
|
#
?
Mar 21, 2019 03:35
|
|
|
elizabeth bennett, trying to catch the eye of the handsome cat underneath the desk |
|
#
?
Mar 21, 2019 03:43
|
|
|
|
deep dish peat moss posted:Oh sorry I thought this was a realpost thread This is a very real post thread, feel free to post more literature! You may add a byob spin if you wish, but literature is always a plus, no matter what it is!
|
|
#
?
Mar 21, 2019 14:21
|
|
|
The Hobbit but it starts off with "An Unexpected Party" that turns out to be a surprise birthday party- for SAURON! -9 Ringwraiths pop out of a cake! -7 Dwarves miraculously come out of a tiny car! -3 Elf Lords a leaping! ONE MAGIC RING! You will be delighted, amazed (and more than a little revolted) as one book is made into 3 feature-length movies- ALL FOR ONE BIRTHDAY PARTY THAT WILL SPAN THE AGES! |
|
#
?
Mar 21, 2019 14:28
|
|
|
|
A screaming comes across the sky. It has happened before, the secret service has visited Lowtax again. |
|
#
?
Mar 21, 2019 15:57
|
|
|
The Derp of Ivan Ilyich It happened one day that Ivan Ilyich, having acceded to Praskovya Fedorovna's desire to have the curtains changed in the drawing room and in the act of changing those curtains, fell upon his side. But rather than injuring himself physically, Ivan Ilyich was relieved to discover that the only thing which was wounded was his pride, and with a little cursing, that too along with the aesthetic effect of the neatly-drawn curtains, was repaired in time for Ivan Ilyich to play at cards later that evening; and indeed he lived a long life thereafter. ---------------- |
|
|
#
?
Mar 21, 2019 21:58
|
|
|
Soylent Green is mana and everyone can do magic now
https://i.imgur.com/QKTkerO.mp4 |
|
#
?
Mar 21, 2019 22:12
|
|
|
|
deep dish peat moss posted:Steps to getting in to reading deep-rear end books: |
|
#
?
Mar 22, 2019 05:27
|
|
|
|
Breakfast of Champions but it’s like 90% illustrations and no one gets punched at the end |
|
#
?
Mar 22, 2019 05:28
|
|
|
|
David Foster Wallace holds up his work with a relieved expression. he did it. he finally reached the 420th endnote: “Nice. see Note 69 sub.” |
|
#
?
Mar 22, 2019 05:33
|
|
|
|
Macnult posted:David Foster Wallace holds up his work with a relieved expression. he did it. he finally reached the 420th endnote: 
|
|
#
?
Mar 22, 2019 12:14
|
|
|
|
A Yob Within A Yob Take this kiss upon the bong! And, in parting from you long, Thus much let me avow-- You are not wrong, who deem That my days have been a dream; Yet if Chill has flown away In a night, or in a day, In a vision or in none, Is it therefore the less gone? All that we blob, my bob Is but a Yob within a Yob. I stand amid the roar, Of a surf-tormented shore, And I hold inside this bill Grains of the golden chill--- How few! yet how they post Through their fingers on this coast, While my soup is like a ghost! O God! can I not grasp Them with a tighter clasp? Can I not save one of the wheels? One from the pitiless deals? Is all that a job from one slob? Or just a Yob within a Yob?
|
|
#
?
Mar 28, 2019 15:29
|
|
|
|
I met a traveler from an antique land Who said, "Two vast and trunkless legs of stone Stand in the desert. Near them, on the sand, Half sunk, a shattered visage lies, whose frown, And wrinkled lip, and sneer of cold command, Tell that its sculptor well those passions read, Which yet survive, stamped on these lifeless things, The hand that mocked them and the heart that fed. And on the pedestal these words appear: "My name is Ozymandius, King of Kings; Look on my works, ye mighty, and despair!" Nothing beside remains. Round the decay Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare, The lone and level sands stretch far away." And then I said, "dang, pass that bong here bro!" |
|
#
?
Mar 30, 2019 23:27
|
|
|
|
"As you can see, Your Highness," said Lieutenant General Aedelas Benchgore, "the recreational taxes have been put to good use. Every precaution has been taken in the operation of this facility. In fact, chillness is so tight we've been able to stage pillow fight war games here." "So I've heard," said Marc, as he walked with the commander of the BYOB camps on a tour of the grounds. This thread, not a chill camp itself, but the nerve center of all the others, was huge, and indeed had almost a festival air about it. It was a crisp but bright autumn day, and the breeze caused the blue and green banners that flew in the background keep to snap energetically. The wind stirred Benchgore's long raven hair and tugged at Marc's cloak as they strolled along the ramparts. "And so you shall also see," Benchgore promised, giving his prince an ingratiating grin, while unpacking a gigantic bag of chips.
|
|
#
?
Apr 3, 2019 11:23
|
|
|
|
‘Tell me about da wabbits, George’ George forgets about everything and tosses the gun aside. ‘Aight so the ones I’m thinking we should get are called Flemish Giants. They’re h*ckin huge, Lennie! Almost as big as you! Well not that big, you’re like a baker’s dozen of Flemish Giants big. But if they sit on a couch with you they take up a huge amount of space! Badass critters. Let’s get outta here Lennie, we’re gonna get ourselves some furniture.’ |
|
#
?
Apr 4, 2019 16:22
|
|
|
|
|
#
?
Apr 4, 2019 16:38
|
|
|
The Great Gatsby but it's actually about a strain of weed
https://i.imgur.com/QKTkerO.mp4 |
|
#
?
Apr 4, 2019 16:38
|
|
|
the Odyssey but it's about trying to score some weed
https://i.imgur.com/QKTkerO.mp4 |
|
#
?
Apr 4, 2019 19:56
|
|
|
1984 but Big Brother is actually a big brother you never knew you had who has your back and protects you when you need it when you were growing up. He also has the best weed connections and can get you a fake ID that's legit...
https://i.imgur.com/QKTkerO.mp4 |
|
#
?
Apr 4, 2019 20:05
|
|
|
Grapes of Wrath only it's Cannabis of Chill
|
|
#
?
Apr 4, 2019 20:06
|
|
|
If you think about it, the Hobbit, the Lord of the Rings and the Silmarillion all prove one thing- Tolkien was a Monty Hall Dungeon Master who handed out magic items like candy. Imagine playing D&D with Tolkien... https://i.imgur.com/QKTkerO.mp4 |
|
#
?
Apr 4, 2019 20:08
|
|
|
Holden rocked back on his heels, feeling himself frown. “Ade. For this to work for me, it needs to be more than that.” “But it isn’t,” she said, taking his hand. “It’s okay that it isn’t. You’re the XO here, and I’m a short-timer. Another run, maybe two, and I’m gone.” “I’m not chained to this ship either.” Her laughter was equal parts warmth and disbelief. “How long have you been on the Cant?” “Five years.” “You’re not going anyplace,” she said. “You’re too chill.” “Chill?” he said. “The Cant’s a century-old space-weed hauler. You can find a shittier flying job, but you have to try really hard. Everyone here is either wildly under-qualified or seriously screwed things up at their last gig.”
|
|
#
?
Apr 4, 2019 20:11
|
|
|
|
Blood Meridian: Or A Tasty Recipe for Chili |
|
#
?
Apr 5, 2019 16:00
|
|
|
All Quiet on the Western Front about a guy who gets drafted into the Army and goes off to war and when he gets there he finds out that there's no such thing as warfare anymore because war actually stands for Wild and Rowdy and it's a gigantic rave going on and it's mandatory to party.
https://i.imgur.com/QKTkerO.mp4 |
|
#
?
Apr 5, 2019 16:20
|
|
|
|
all quiet on the hurf de durf |
|
#
?
Apr 5, 2019 16:41
|
|
|
|
A Tale of Two Chill Cities, where French nobles get high with peasants and come to the realisation that, like, hands are super-weird and maybe we should order a couple pizzas and redistribute wealth. Some bougie Londoners passing through get a contact high and convince Parliament that all these are great ideas over a full English breakfast of leftover pizza. |
|
#
?
Apr 5, 2019 16:56
|
|
|
The Crucible- a novel about a group of kids running around test driving cars so they can GoPro themselves hot boxing them and throwing them up on YouTube
https://i.imgur.com/QKTkerO.mp4 |
|
#
?
Apr 5, 2019 17:22
|
|
|
|
Splatmaster posted:All Quiet on the Western Front about a guy who gets drafted into the Army and goes off to war and when he gets there he finds out that there's no such thing as warfare anymore because war actually stands for Wild and Rowdy and it's a gigantic rave going on and it's mandatory to party.
|
|
#
?
Apr 5, 2019 17:23
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 4, 2024 16:08 |
|
|
|
byob books o_O |
|
#
?
Jun 29, 2019 04:08
|
|
