• Becky, Charlotte and Ronda face the Riott Squad tonight in a six-woman tag, with a stipulation that the first of the three to turn on the other or betray them would be removed from the Main Event of Wrestlemania.
  
• Stephanie opened the show with a joke about adding herself as the 4th participant in the Wrestlemania Main Event. She explained that it would be "Winner Takes All" and both the Raw and Smackdown titles would be on the line, and whoever won the match would be a Double Champion even if the actual Champion does not get pinned.
  
• Steph immediately left (the entire segment took 4 minutes) and then Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman arrived. Heyman did a promo about how Brock takes everything from people at Wrestlemania, including their hopes and dreams, and he will do the same at Mania to Seth.
  
• Seth arrived and claimed that this wasn't only the biggest match of his career but Brock's as well, because he was going to change everything by ridding WWE of Brock. Brock laughed him off and tried to walk away, so Seth kicked him on the dick. Brock suplexed Seth, but he escaped an F5 attempt and punched him on the dick, then hit the Curb Stomp before leaving.
  
• Seth was interviewed backstage where he was reminded that if he kicked Brock on the dick at Wrestlemania he'd be DQed. Seth blew that off, saying that Brock had it coming.
  
• Sasha Banks, Bayley, Natalya & Beth Phoenix defeated Nia Jax, Tamina & The IIconics in an 8-Woman Tag. Beth was the star of the match, spearing Tamina through the ring barricade and getting the pin on Peyton Royce after a cool looking Glam Slam.
  
• Batista showed up, showed a brief but very effective video of him kicking Triple H's rear end at various points while,"You've done everything.... except beat me" audio played over the top, then got on the mic and said,"Hunter, kiss my rear end" and left. It was very, very cool.
  
• Elias did a piece on location about his musical act at Wrestlemania.
  
• Apollo Crews defeated Jinder Mahal in a match with various members of the roster who will be in the Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal surrounding him at ringside. Post-match, everybody wanted to lose with the Andre Trophy which kicked off into a big brawl. Everybody got thrown out until only Apollo and Jinder were left, and Apollo tossed Jinder and the Singhs out to (for the second time in 2 minutes) be the "winner".
  
• Yolanda Adams will perform America the Beautiful at Wrestlemania.
  
• Kurt Angle came to the ring to thank the fans for his career, and the crowd was directed to watch a Titantron video of highlights of Kurt's career (there are a LOT of highlights). The crowd gave Kurt a standing ovation.
  
• Baron Corbin came out to mock Kurt, saying he was a relic who couldn't hang with the modern generation of wrestlers, including himself. Corbin said he was irritated with people saying Kurt deserved a better final opponent than himself, and assured everybody the last you would see of Kurt would be his pitiful defeat at Corbin's hands. Angle challenged him to an Exhibition match, Corbin faked accepting then walked away.
  
• Rey Mysterio came out and Corbin slipped into the ring to avoid him. Mysterio said he would teach him a lesson in respect and challenged him to a match. Corbin tried to cheapshot Mysterio, but Angle and Mysterio teamed up to send his packing.
  
• Charlotte Flair was interviewed backstage about the Winner Takes All stipulation at Wrestlemania, and the "no betrayals" stip for tonight's six-women tag. Charlotte said she wasn't worried about either, because she was a game-changer and things would always go her way.
  
• The Revival retained their tag titles in a pretty fun match against Aleister Black and Ricochet. They won via countout, after the non-legal man hid under the ring and grabbed Ricochet's foot before he could beat the count. Black and Ricochet laid out The Revival post-match.
  
• Ronda Rousey was approached backstage and insisted she was there to fight, not talk. She then cut a promo talking trash about Becky and Ronda and making a point of mentioning the PPV this coming Sunday.
  
• The Hall of Fame airs on the WWE Network Saturday at 7ET
  
• Alexa Bliss was talking backstage with Tyler Breeze and ECIII, laughing about the SNL guys being in the Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal until BRAUN! showed up. BRAUN! found a couple of jobbers and said tonight they're stand-ins for the SNL guys and they better show up to the ring tonight or he'd come find them.
  
• Roman was doing an interview backstage about accepting Drew McIntyre's challenge when he was blindsided by Drew who screamed,"YOU SHOULD HAVE SAID NO!" at him.
  
• Becky was interviewed backstage and said she was in Ronda's head and had Charlotte's number, and she was going to go to the Main Event of Wrestlemania and make history, because she had no other choice.
  
• Becky, Charlotte and Ronda defeated The Riott Squad. Ronda and Charlotte had gotten into each others faces, but despite Liv trying to take advantage, Ronda was able to roll her into an Armbar and get her to submit.
  
• IMMEDIATELY Ronda just punched Charlotte right in the goddamn throat and all three started beating the poo poo out of each other. Security and then police rushed to the ring as the three women fought each other and then the guards, with Ronda getting cuffed. Becky oddly seemed to be the reasonable one as she showed respect to the police... then immediately jumped Ronda the moment she was cuffed to put the boots to her. The cops cuffed Becky as well. Charlotte came out of nowhere to punch Ronda in the face and kick at Becky, so SHE got cuffed too. All three were escorted out, all of them struggling and kicking at the cops and each other, complaining that THEY paid the cops' salary, not the McMahons.
  
• The post-match was a lot of fun
  
• The cops - idiots! - put Becky and Ronda both in the back seat, and after a pause they both started kicking the poo poo out of each other, literally breaking out the car window. Becky got hauled out and she and Charlotte started beating the poo poo out of each other.
  
• RONDA TRIED TO STEAL THE loving CAR AND DROVE IT INTO ANOTHER CAR AS SHE TRIED TO DRIVE CUFFED
  
• This should have closed the show. It was basically this in wrestling form:
  
• https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j2zlPNGuPbw
  
• Roode/Gable vs. Heavy Machinery was interupted by Lacey Evans walking out, walking around the entrance platform and then (off-screen) leaving. Heavy Machinery defeated Roode and Gable.
  
• It was reported that Becky, Charlotte and Ronda had all been booked at a local precient and the story would be updated on Social Media.
  
• BRAUN! demolished the two jobber stand-ins for the SNL guys who will be on Wrestlemania.
  
• Finn Balor appeared on the titantron while Lashley and Lio Rush were in the ring, and changed into the Demon, warning Lashley that was what was coming for him at Wrestlemania.
  

• Abroham Lincoln posted:

  
  

• Somehow the main event of Raw was Baron Corbin (yes, in the main event AGAIN) against Rey Mysterio.
  
• Baron Corbin defeated Rey Mysterio. Clean.
  
• As Corbin headed up the ramp enjoying his victory, Kurt Angle jumped him from behind and put him into the Ankle Lock until refs pulled him off.
  
• Perhaps belated realizing it should have ended the show, they did a brief recap of the excellent Becky/Charlotte/Ronda segment.
  

• The Kevin Owens Show featured AJ Styles and Randy Orton as guests. They talked poo poo at each other about failed drug tests, AJ wasting his career away on the Indies, Orton coasting by on a single move etc. When Orton said AJ's legacy would be replacing John Cena as WWE's Corporate Bitch, AJ had heard enough. Owens immediately left because he's no fool, and the two started fighting. AJ tried to hit the Phenomenal Forearm but Orton countered with an RKO, demonstrating that perhaps one move really is all he needs.
  
• The Usos and Black/Ricochet defeated The Bar and Rusev & Nakamura in an 8-man tag. It was a really good match. Afterwards, Alexa Bliss emerged and said The Usos had to face repercussions for forfeiting in the Tag Gauntlet against The New Day which allowed Kofi Kingston to get a WWE Championship shot. So they would defend the titles at Wrestlemania against the three other teams in the match just completed.
  
• All four teams immediately started brawling. The match itself is probably gonna be great.
  
• The IIconics came to the ring and cut a promo on their opponents at Wrestlemania, pointing out they'd already beaten tag champs Bayley & Sasha Banks in a non-title match. They promised they would win the titles and make Wrestlemania iconic.
  
• The Miz defeated SAnitY in a handicap match (seriously!), even in spite of Shane McMahon making it a Falls Count Anywhere match halfway through. Miz fought backstage and eventually pinned Eric Young outside the arena.
  
• Shane McMahon left in a limo as a cop car pulled up and Becky Lynch stepped out.
  
• Corey Graves tried to introduce Becky but she snatched the mic off of him, got up on top of the announce table and said she answers to the people, not Graves. She pointed out that last year Ronda hadn't debuted and she and Charlotte were friends. Everything was in place for Charlotte and Ronda to face each other at Mania this year, but Becky changed up the game and fought with everything she had to earn that same chance. She promised the next time the fans saw her, she would be the Double Champ.
  
• In what was claimed to be the biggest mixed tag match in history, an 18-person match featuring male and female competitors from the two battle royals at Wrestlemania ended with no winner after everybody just started tossing each other out of the ring. The teams were EC3, Mandy Rose, Sonya Deville, Andrade, Zelina Vega, Lana, The Good Brothers and Shelton Benjamin vs. Nikki Cross, Heavy Machinery, Naomi, The Hardys, R-Truth, Carmella and Asuka. The last in the ring were Jeff Hardy, EC3 and Asuka. Jeff Hardy tossed EC3 out of the ring, then Jeff and Asuka hugged before she tossed him out of the ring.
  
• US Champion Samoa Joe defeated Mustafa Ali in a non-title match, choking him out with the Coquina Clutch.
  
• The contract signing between Daniel Bryan and Kofi Kingston was the main event of the evening. The crowd was hugely behind Kofi, but after signing Bryan held onto the contract so he could "educate" Kofi on a few things. He claimed Kofi was complacent and had needed to be pushed by others to get to his current point, but this was as good as it was going to get. He pointed out that the fans who chant KOFI! were the same fans who used to chant YES! for himself, and he couldn't rely on them because they were parasites.
  
• Kofi shut Bryan up and said now it was his turn to listen. Kofi was somebody who watched and learned. He'd watched Bryan come to WWE and win the title within 2 years while Kofi himself spent over a decade without a title shot. But he had his chance NOW, and he'd watched others do what he hadn't and he'd learned. He had his Wrestlemania match, his title shot, and he was going to take advantage NOW. He would be the new WWE Champion at Wrestlemania.
  
• Kofi signed the contract and stared down Daniel Bryan as the show went off the air.
  

Jerusalem fucked around with this message at 06:37 on Apr 3, 2019

Fluffy Bunnies fucked around with this message at 04:29 on Apr 2, 2019

Jerusalem fucked around with this message at 04:14 on Apr 2, 2019