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Cavauro
Jan 9, 2008



Rarity's NXT TakeOver: New York is an upcoming professional wrestling show and WWE Network event produced by WWE for their NXT brand. The event will take place on April 5, 2019, at the Barclays Center in Brooklyn, New York. Its occurrence is imminent. I don't have any idea what is happening on the show or what has been happening in this company on more than a surface level that may be incorrect. Do you remember when the Take Over events had names instead of being named a city's name? One of them was called TakeOver MakeOver. J/K

Here are the matches in order of importance.


Fatal Fourway: Shayna Baszler (c) versus Kairi Sane versus Io Shirai versus Bianca Belair for the NXT Women’s Championship

Your main event for the evening. This is the important match to determine whether womens' wrestling will thrive, and if mens' wrestling will survive. If Bianca Belair does not win, NXT will never recover from its large creative slump.


Pete Dunne (c) versus small walter for the NXT UK Championship

The main event. small walter (pictured to scale) lives in Germany I believe, and refuses to leave the country and was able to get that written into his contract. He is expected to no-show the event.


Velveteen Dream (c) versus Matt Riddle for the North American Championship

This is likely the main event of the show. The "Riddle" of this "Matt"ch is to find out if Matt Riddle wants to become the barefoot NXT champion that Alexander Rusev could not, or if he is racist against black people instead.


Two out of Three Falls: Johnny Gargano versus Adam Cole for the NXT Championship

This appears to be the main event. The champion's belt has been vacated by Baldbeard, one of Rosaria's Fingers. Johnny Gargano the Blue Sentinel was supposed to be in this match and Adam Cole the Aldrich Faithful wasn't supposed to be in it. Adam Cole won the right to be in it, and I am not sure if it really matters. Whoever wins two of the falls will become the NXT Champion and stay in NXT until they are 36 years old. Three falls are not guaranteed. You are not allowed to get a refund if there are only two falls.


War Raiders (c) versus Ricochet and Aleister Black for the NXT Tag Team Championships

And in the main event, this match is all about teaming together and figuring out who really are the champions of it once and for all. I don't care about it. I'm sorry. I know it will be good, for you, and I'm sure I will like watching it while it happens quite a lot. That's what matters. I'm only saying in terms of emotion, there is nothing available to give.

---

The kickoff show for Rarity's NXT TakeOver: New York begins at 6 p.m. ET on the WWE YouTube Channel, or somewhere. It might be on the WWE Network. I have never seen a kickoff show, and won't see this one. It will start minutes after I send this thread which I am going to do here in a second, in case you want to talk about whatever happens on there. If you don't then that makes sense, because I don't either. Ok, I found it now. Here's the video of it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=chEsVqDTwJo

Rarity's NXT TakeOver: New York begins in earnest at 7 p.m. ET on the WWE Network. I don't know what timezone you live in, but you are allowed to tell me by posting here about it or sending me a PM. Post about anything you want in here, for that matter. I have worked out a deal with full cooperation from the mods that no one can get in trouble for anything they post in this thread, even if you do something extremely illegal. I'm sorry for making all of the pics yellow. I thought it would be a fun little "gag" but it hurts my eyes a lot. I don't have good eyes either so I am wondering if it would hurt good eyes more than mine, or less than mine. I've gotten some peppered beef jerky to have during the event, but a very small bug was in with it and I ate the bug. NXT loving sucks! Fight forever!

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Cavauro
Jan 9, 2008

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Cavauro
Jan 9, 2008

it was an accident that this is on here already. Please come here later and don't forget

Pinwiz11
Jan 26, 2009

I'm becom-, I'm becom-,
I'm becoming
Tana in, Tana in my mind.



Even though he's not officially listed on the card...

gently caress YOU RODDY

Insertnamehere31
Jan 23, 2012

This could be the most one-sided fight since 1973 when Ali faced an eighty-foot tall mechanical Joe Frazier. My memory isn't what it used to be, but I think the entire Earth was destroyed.

Thank you for the recap cavauro. I am excited for the main events.

Also free Rarity

Auritech
May 27, 2004

Blessed be the tailors
The masks are cut to fit

Blessed be the woodworkers
The crosses and the gallows

Blessed be the forgers of iron
And the spikes and the barbwire

Blessed be the stone cutters
It took a quarry to bury the dreams
I got bad quality sleep but the adrenaline will keep me up!!!

Do not even ask
Apr 8, 2008


sam roberts likes landlords

80s James Hetfield
Jan 20, 2004

METAL UP YOUR ASS
Has anyone ever told Sam Roberts he needs to just let that hair go?

21 Hoot Salute
Feb 8, 2005

Night-time, turn around
Lonely is the city tonight
Night-time, all around
Lonely in the city tonight



I am happy to post in this Cavauro sponsored Takeover thread

is pepsi ok
Oct 23, 2002

I wore my Undisputed Era shirt to lunch today and this guy waved at me from across the parking lot and did the Adam Cole "BOOM" gesture :3:

Pinwiz11
Jan 26, 2009

I'm becom-, I'm becom-,
I'm becoming
Tana in, Tana in my mind.



Are there jorts?

Auritech
May 27, 2004

Blessed be the tailors
The masks are cut to fit

Blessed be the woodworkers
The crosses and the gallows

Blessed be the forgers of iron
And the spikes and the barbwire

Blessed be the stone cutters
It took a quarry to bury the dreams
I would sign a change.org petition to ban Sam Roberts from talking

MotU
Mar 6, 2007

It was like she was evicting walking garbage.
Pillbug
someone swat sam roberts

Shayna Baszler
Oct 24, 2001

i'll always take care of you
Muldoon
goodbye Rarity
though i never knew you at all

Pinwiz11
Jan 26, 2009

I'm becom-, I'm becom-,
I'm becoming
Tana in, Tana in my mind.



gently caress YOU RODDY

Auritech
May 27, 2004

Blessed be the tailors
The masks are cut to fit

Blessed be the woodworkers
The crosses and the gallows

Blessed be the forgers of iron
And the spikes and the barbwire

Blessed be the stone cutters
It took a quarry to bury the dreams
Yay for watching other people playing video games?

pressedbunny
May 31, 2007

To A Brand New Galaxy
Being given a million dollars is pretty much the only way you could get me to play WWE 2K19.

PASS THE MASH
Oct 30, 2013


Does AJ get the million if he wins?

DarkstarIV
Apr 6, 2010

OFFICIAL RACIST
Part of me hopes AJ loses just so he throws a massive temper tantrum.

pressedbunny
May 31, 2007

To A Brand New Galaxy
How can you tell who has the most health left when there's no health meter?

ed: Someone slap this chode

Le Saboteur
Dec 5, 2007

I hear you wish to ball, adventurer..
Is this guy a plant or an actor? They seem to have trained him well to deliver his lines.

DarkstarIV
Apr 6, 2010

OFFICIAL RACIST
This is the only time you'll ever see Brock Lesnar in NXT. And thats only because its a videogame.

Le Saboteur
Dec 5, 2007

I hear you wish to ball, adventurer..
My man just ethered Corey Graves. Please win.

ExHumus
Aug 30, 2006

BOOM BOOM!!

Le Saboteur posted:

Is this guy a plant or an actor? They seem to have trained him well to deliver his lines.

They had people who qualified submit audition tapes and picked 4 people for the final tournament.

Auritech
May 27, 2004

Blessed be the tailors
The masks are cut to fit

Blessed be the woodworkers
The crosses and the gallows

Blessed be the forgers of iron
And the spikes and the barbwire

Blessed be the stone cutters
It took a quarry to bury the dreams
AJ doesn’t know how to do reversals haha

PASS THE MASH
Oct 30, 2013


Wonder how much Brock is making for this

Cool Post Beg
Mar 6, 2008

DADDY MAGIC
lol theyve got the tutorial on

Le Saboteur
Dec 5, 2007

I hear you wish to ball, adventurer..
Lol this is totally setup. AJ intentionally taunted to start the match.

Grant DaNasty
Jul 17, 2006

AJ is throwing the match. This thing is fixed!

pressedbunny
May 31, 2007

To A Brand New Galaxy
Yup, that's how poo poo those games are.

Le Saboteur
Dec 5, 2007

I hear you wish to ball, adventurer..
Uh is this whole thing a setup. This man does not seem to care at all he won a million.

PASS THE MASH
Oct 30, 2013


Normal Brock Lesnar match

is pepsi ok
Oct 23, 2002

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vhe3vSe-mmw

21 Hoot Salute
Feb 8, 2005

Night-time, turn around
Lonely is the city tonight
Night-time, all around
Lonely in the city tonight



That was embarassing and I'm glad it's over

Hope it didn't kill the crowd for tonight!

Le Saboteur
Dec 5, 2007

I hear you wish to ball, adventurer..
That was the most anti climactic person winning a million dollars ever.

is pepsi ok
Oct 23, 2002

Le Saboteur posted:

Is this guy a plant or an actor? They seem to have trained him well to deliver his lines.

His twitter says he's a ring announcer and his facebook is WWEGoldenVoice so yeah definitely a plant. That was all so loving stupid.

Astro7x
Aug 4, 2004
Thinks It's All Real
AJ got caught taunting twice and think he only pulled off one reversal

born on a buy you
Aug 14, 2005

Odd Fullback
Bird Gang
Sack Them All
You have to give WWE props for keeping Kayfabe alive with the video game Brock match being the same as a real life Brock match

Le Saboteur
Dec 5, 2007

I hear you wish to ball, adventurer..
AJ was clearly just losing on purpose so I guess that part of the contest was a formality or something. But he didn't even seem to care when he beat the actual guys at Axxess. Just fuckin weird.

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Truther Vandross
Jun 17, 2008

Sam Roberts looks like the lead in an all-male version of Annie

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