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This is going to be like that time that I rapped for BYOB and made the boats torture song that tindeck ate but with also some spoken word and better production values TRACK LISTING 1. GOTTA BIG BOOTY 2. I'm Heather Papps 3. Throw The Thing Away 4. Keeping the Cheesefaith 5. Bootyphus 6. Eating Mushrooms deep dish peat moss fucked around with this message at 03:01 on Sep 2, 2019 |
# ? Aug 31, 2019 21:52 |
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# ? Jun 6, 2024 08:10 |
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GODSPEED JOHN GLENN posted:every day she screams this phase into the ether. her voice emanating from this house only to get lost in the void. knick knacks knocked off of shelves, umbrella stand tumbles onto the floor and I say nothing. I do not even look in her direction. "we gonna ignore the fact that i've GOT A HUGE BOOTY," she screams again and again. the bookshelf has fallen over. Books are everywhere. I cannot acknowledge it. I MUST ignore the fact that she GOT A HUGE BOOTY. Such is the Orphean deal that I have made with the gods. We no longer share a bed, There is no longer any room for me, but I can never utter why. I MUSE ignore the fact that SHE GOT A BIG BOOTY else all i will be lost. Is a life where all I can do is ignore the face that sheGOT A BIG BOOTY even worth living? But the question is moot, as I am bound by duty and divine contract and I am a man of honor. |
# ? Aug 31, 2019 21:57 |
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https://vocaroo.com/i/s1wIw5js9hht |
# ? Aug 31, 2019 22:26 |
Please and thank you
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# ? Aug 31, 2019 22:47 |
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This is certainly the best possible thing you could read. Please, and thank you very much Good Buddy!
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# ? Aug 31, 2019 22:55 |
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that was amazing, thank you so very, very much |
# ? Aug 31, 2019 23:09 |
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Oh my God, it's a masterpiece
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# ? Aug 31, 2019 23:13 |
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Goons Are Great posted:Oh my God, it's a masterpiece |
# ? Aug 31, 2019 23:14 |
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byob is the only place to still find poetry in the world |
# ? Aug 31, 2019 23:27 |
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Good afternoon, my name is Heather Papps, and I am here to tell you my story. I was cut from the belly of a hanged woman, forged in the fires of an armory, strengthened unto iron. I am here, to say hello to my friends, my family, and everyone. I love you. We, BYOB, love you. You are good. You are smart. You are funny. You are valid. We love you. Come home, friend. Let us chill together. There are hammocks a plenty, and the color scheme is oh so nice. You'll like it. You'll have a good time, like me, your friend in life and posting, Heather Papps. I love you thank you goodnight.
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# ? Aug 31, 2019 23:32 |
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Heather Papps posted:Good afternoon, my name is Heather Papps, and I am here to tell you my story. By the by, this is the text I would like you to record, the text in quote block form above. Thank you, please.
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# ? Aug 31, 2019 23:34 |
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Heather Papps posted:Good afternoon, my name is Heather Papps, and I am here to tell you my story. https://vocaroo.com/i/s1MJPYmSd98r |
# ? Aug 31, 2019 23:44 |
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I am not crying I have been cooking and I had to dice onions OKAY I am not weeping from pure joy.
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# ? Aug 31, 2019 23:47 |
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Manifisto posted:a bad man wants to do bad things. the bad man can be stopped by throwing something away, but grownups can't be trusted to throw the thing away because they are very greedy and will keep the thing instead and use it for nasty grownup stuff. so it's up to some small basically children to go to the place to throw it away, and it's hard because almost everybody else in the world wants the thing, including another child who became really bad and ugly and not nice because he wanted the thing too much. there are also some really smart and friendly tall grownups who don't want the thing and sing a lot of songs. people wonder why the children didn't ride eagles to the place where they can throw the thing away, and actually nobody knows why they didn't ride the eagles, it would have been much faster. This one would be good. How long is too long friend?
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# ? Aug 31, 2019 23:52 |
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Heather Papps posted:This one would be good. How long is too long friend? a good quote one from the distant past: quote:misty mountaintop posted: |
# ? Aug 31, 2019 23:55 |
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magic cactus posted:"I leave Sisyphus at the foot of the mountain. One always finds one's burden again. But Sisyphus teaches the higher fidelity that negates the gods and raises rocks. He too concludes that all is well. This universe henceforth without a master seems to him neither sterile nor futile. Each atom of that stone, each mineral flake of that night-filled mountain, in itself, forms a world. The struggle itself toward the heights is enough to fill a man's heart. One must imagine Sisyphus with a HUGE BOOTY" -Albert Camus Lil Swamp Booger Baby posted:Aaah gently caress!! I scream as I clutch at my heart, the room is spinning, my vision is a smear of colors and bright exploding stars, I hear the muddled and drowned out din of smashing and clattering as my left arm flails and knocks over all the insulin in the pharmacy, I can hear the thudding footsteps of the pharmacy techs rushing over as my vision slowly fades to black and the world turns askew as my body hurtles towards the ground in slow motion. google THIS posted:Sandtrooper: How long have you had dat HUGE BOOTY? Stoner Sloth posted:This is the law of the BOOTYukon, and ever she makes it plain: Heather Papps posted:For the purposes of discussion, Richard Dawkins described seven "milestones" on his spectrum of booty believability:[5] This is a single thread. There is much gold to mine from here.
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# ? Aug 31, 2019 23:56 |
Luvcow posted:a good quote Lmao |
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# ? Aug 31, 2019 23:57 |
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Heather Papps posted:This one would be good. How long is too long friend? https://vocaroo.com/i/s0L5S63THSuR |
# ? Sep 1, 2019 00:05 |
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these have all been magical and wonderful |
# ? Sep 1, 2019 00:32 |
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If I go deaf tomorrow it will have been okay.
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# ? Sep 1, 2019 01:28 |
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Luvcow posted:a good quote https://vocaroo.com/i/s0Jl7QjwFiRj |
# ? Sep 1, 2019 02:02 |
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these are grrrrrreat!
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# ? Sep 1, 2019 02:07 |
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Heather Papps posted:This is a single thread. There is much gold to mine from here. https://vocaroo.com/i/s0GQN9610uAz |
# ? Sep 1, 2019 02:25 |
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I love you
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# ? Sep 1, 2019 03:19 |
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If anyone asks what the best thread on the whole internet ever was, I will copy/paste the link to this one. You are a hero.
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# ? Sep 1, 2019 04:06 |
# ? Sep 1, 2019 15:23 |
Please serenade us thusly:quote:Ring ding ding daa baa I thank you kind sir.
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# ? Sep 1, 2019 21:29 |
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I secondly thank you, kind sir.
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# ? Sep 1, 2019 22:17 |
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a woman stands up on top of the bar. “everyone! i have an announcement to make: we are doing a scavenger hunt and i have to say this everywhere we go, but this is my best friend sarah and she is getting married!!!” everyone starts clapping, me included. i’m so happy for sarah and her loud friend. i realize this is the perfect time for me to also make a special announcement. i stand up on my table. “everyone! i also have an announcement to make!” all of mellow mushroom’s patrons eagerly turn to look at me. “i eat rear end!” happy faces turn to disgust and confusion. no one claps. i am asked to leave the establishment. |
# ? Sep 1, 2019 22:52 |
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Macnult posted:a woman stands up on top of the bar. “everyone! i have an announcement to make: we are doing a scavenger hunt and i have to say this everywhere we go, but this is my best friend sarah and she is getting married!!!” I applaud. It is slow but it is just.
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# ? Sep 1, 2019 23:24 |
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Macnult posted:a woman stands up on top of the bar. “everyone! i have an announcement to make: we are doing a scavenger hunt and i have to say this everywhere we go, but this is my best friend sarah and she is getting married!!!” My neighbors must think I'm really weird https://vocaroo.com/i/s1tEgVx7DHsJ |
# ? Sep 2, 2019 02:58 |
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Bonaventure posted:When Torvus returned from the hunt with much meat, father greeted him and then praised the bear he had killed, did it homage, and poured out a flagon of mead before it. This is proper to assuage the vengeance of its ghost I admit; but did father praise Torvus' cunning, or Torvus' strength? How does father believe Torvus killed this bear -- magic? Behold, this is a joke -- we all know magic belongs to the sorcerers beyond the mountain. But father is rude. Father is always praising the meat, while neglecting the hunter who procures the meat. Heather Papps posted:when i burst forward screaming from my mother, my father hoisted me up, then severed the cord to womanhood with a swift swipe of a blade. then he thrust the sword into the earth, displayed my brooding visage to them and declared
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# ? Sep 2, 2019 03:16 |
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Bonaventure posted:When the Southern King-- the one known as 'The Iron Hawk,' I mean-- came with his retinue to the gathering of clans, he brought his astrologers and magicians. I was suspicious of this, since magic is detestable to me and the sorcerers beyond the mountain are bad enough on their own. But father was overawed by them and their trickery. The Clowner posted:tales will be sung years hence that it was father who beseiged the valleymen's fort to the north, plundered their keep and set fire upon it all. at the feast, they will say, he smelted their ill-gotten gold into a mighty greataxe which he then plunged, still white-hot, into the valleyman chief's skull, to the cheers of the warriors and the cold approval of the hierarchs, blessed be their wisdom. children will sing hymns of father's march to the western shores, how he tore the boatmen from their decadent triremes and galleons, how he fed the sea regent to his own pet sharks. future generations will know of his conquests of the southern wastes, and the eastern jungles, and beyond, resulting in the foretold fulfillment of prophesy: the ultimate union of the entire continent under his banner, at the behest of the hierarchs, blessed be their wisdom. but, I say this to you, the songs will fall silent on his weaknesses, his ineptitudes, his failures. to protect the faith, our children's children will not sing of father's greatest embarrassment: maining chrom in super smash brothers ultimate like an unwashed tier-whore
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# ? Sep 2, 2019 03:17 |
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deep dish peat moss posted:My neighbors must think I'm really weird lmao but also that beat slaps |
# ? Sep 2, 2019 06:36 |
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Heather Papps posted:
Hello I'm not from round these parts but I'm sad the topic never took off in gibbus so I am here and I gave this one a shot I hope you like it With music Without I get hoarse near the end but it actually kind of works well I'm not a singer so hopefully dramatic readings will suffice maybe I can get the wife to sing one she's great |
# ? Sep 3, 2019 23:08 |
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Songbearer posted:
Have u considered sticking around and doing more of god's work?
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# ? Sep 3, 2019 23:25 |
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bee eater posted:Have u considered sticking around and doing more of god's work? I will feed on more of these texts |
# ? Sep 3, 2019 23:57 |
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Songbearer posted:I will feed on more of these texts luv u bb
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# ? Sep 4, 2019 00:16 |
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Godspeed John posted:every day she screams this phase into the ether. her voice emanating from this house only to get lost in the void. knick knacks knocked off of shelves, umbrella stand tumbles onto the floor and I say nothing. I do not even look in her direction. "we gonna ignore the fact that i've GOT A HUGE BOOTY," she screams again and again. the bookshelf has fallen over. Books are everywhere. I cannot acknowledge it. I MUST ignore the fact that she GOT A HUGE BOOTY. Such is the Orphean deal that I have made with the gods. We no longer share a bed, There is no longer any room for me, but I can never utter why. I MUSE ignore the fact that SHE GOT A BIG BOOTY else all i will be lost. Is a life where all I can do is ignore the face that sheGOT A BIG BOOTY even worth living? But the question is moot, as I am bound by duty and divine contract and I am a man of honor. Wiv mewsik Wivvaht Heather Papps posted:For the purposes of discussion, Richard Dawkins described seven "milestones" on his spectrum of booty believability:[5] 1) Version with music. "There is music, and I can hear it." 2) Version without. "There is no music, and I will never hear it." Heather Papps posted:when i burst forward screaming from my mother, my father hoisted me up, then severed the cord to womanhood with a swift swipe of a blade. then he thrust the sword into the earth, displayed my brooding visage to them and declared VERSION WITH MUSIC. I NEED NO MUSIC. Manifisto" posted:Manifisto posted: Yes! Yes! Musicses playing for us, it is! NO! SILENCES! SILENCES THE NOISES! this is the most times i've ever yelled "booty" at my mic |
# ? Sep 4, 2019 18:02 |
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# ? Jun 6, 2024 08:10 |
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Songbearer posted:Wiv mewsik help i am dead now, happy, in the ground.
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# ? Sep 4, 2019 21:28 |