Ways to induce labor

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > BYOB Goldmine: Gold Mango > Ways to induce labor

Randy Travesty: PHANTOM QUEEN

Uxzuigal posted:

The doctors officially gave her an eviction notice for Tuesday, if not out by then - we are calling in the military and forcefully extracting her on Wednesday.

guaranteed labor by monday night, i'm so sorry that you're going to be crushed to death by this beautiful new human

also i think byob should get to name the baby

# ? Sep 21, 2019 20:08

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# ? May 15, 2024 14:12

Randy Travesty: PHANTOM QUEEN

Pringles MacGuyver Welter Weight O'Leary Weed Wolf Uxzuigal

# ? Sep 21, 2019 20:09

Uxzuigal: Chill Berserker Dude

Weed Wolf Ylva is her name :> (Ylva actually means wolf!)

Edit:
That means she is double wolf. >.<

<3 <3 Vanisher

# ? Sep 21, 2019 20:14

Randy Travesty: PHANTOM QUEEN

Uxzuigal posted:

Weed Wolf Ylva is her name :> (Ylva actually means wolf!)

Edit:
That means she is double wolf. >.<

needs one more wolf

(also Yiva is a beautiful name!!!)

# ? Sep 21, 2019 20:16

Barking Gecko: Mahoro says, "Naughty things are bad."

Beatrice Bone Babe Berserker, the IK, second of her line & mistress of the Northern Wastes

# ? Sep 21, 2019 20:19

Heather Papps: hello friend

Uxzuigal posted:

Weed Wolf Ylva is her name :> (Ylva actually means wolf!)

Edit:
That means she is double wolf. >.<

a strong name

thanks Dumb Sex-Parrot and deep dish peat moss for this winter bounty!

# ? Sep 21, 2019 20:41

Goons Are Gifts

I hope she comes out before that, but let me tell you that Wednesday babies are generally amazing. Sometimes a bit jumpy, but always good.

# ? Sep 21, 2019 20:56

GODSPEED JOHN GLENN: I put my thumb up my bum and shut one eye, and my thumb blotted out the planet Earth.

Please name the baby Weed rear end Truther: The Robining. Thanks in advance

# ? Sep 21, 2019 21:16

Bobby Deluxe

refer to your baby as 'first' until they have earned a name through their heroic deeds

# ? Sep 21, 2019 22:47

Uxzuigal: Chill Berserker Dude

Barking Gecko posted:

Beatrice Bone Babe Berserker, the IK, second of her line & mistress of the Northern Wastes

Holy crap, I am already afraid of her.

<3 <3 Vanisher

# ? Sep 22, 2019 17:47

Uxzuigal: Chill Berserker Dude

Apperantly Pennywise is now a doctor, they intend to use a ballon to scare her out. Geez. Day 9 btw... Eviction tomorrow!

<3 <3 Vanisher

# ? Sep 23, 2019 16:34

nut

Uxzuigal posted:

Apperantly Pennywise is now a doctor, they intend to use a ballon to scare her out. Geez. Day 9 btw... Eviction tomorrow!

*drags all the char customizing sliders to the left and prays*

# ? Sep 23, 2019 16:52

Uxzuigal: Chill Berserker Dude

nut posted:

*drags all the char customizing sliders to the left and prays*

Phew, Good Looking was to the left!
But so was Maintenance cost and Fart intensity >.<

<3 <3 Vanisher

# ? Sep 23, 2019 19:57

GODSPEED JOHN GLENN: I put my thumb up my bum and shut one eye, and my thumb blotted out the planet Earth.

Uxzuigal posted:

Phew, Good Looking was to the left!
But so was Maintenance cost and Fart intensity >.<

as a person with maxed fart intensity stats, I can honestly say that this baby is going to have a great life.

# ? Sep 24, 2019 02:35

My Asian Grandma: smoking bowls out of blaster rifle barrels

are you going to hold the baby to account for its actions or set a dangerous precedent early on

this is a my asian grandma post � 2019 sig credit PSP

# ? Sep 24, 2019 04:14

canyoneer: I only have canyoneyes for you

eating dates helps. get you to Costco and buy a box.
also they're tasty

# ? Sep 24, 2019 05:40

Uxzuigal: Chill Berserker Dude

GODSPEED JOHN GLENN posted:

as a person with maxed fart intensity stats, I can honestly say that this baby is going to have a great life.

Is that how you got to the moon? And if so - is it because it's made of cheese that you went there, to boldy fart where no man has farted before?

<3 <3 Vanisher

# ? Sep 24, 2019 09:13

Uxzuigal: Chill Berserker Dude

My Asian Grandma posted:

are you going to hold the baby to account for its actions or set a dangerous precedent early on

The "Innocent" slider was also on the left, meaning this kiddo is completely innocent.

canyoneer posted:

eating dates helps. get you to Costco and buy a box.
also they're tasty

Nearest Costco is about 7 hours by plane away, and 500$ ,also illegal to actually fly into the US if you are 7 months pregnant or more.

<3 <3 Vanisher

# ? Sep 24, 2019 09:14

nut

im heading over now u guys can pretend i am ur baby and we'll do cool family things like play nintendo and go bowling to make the real baby jealous

# ? Sep 24, 2019 10:39

Uxzuigal: Chill Berserker Dude

nut posted:

im heading over now u guys can pretend i am ur baby and we'll do cool family things like play nintendo and go bowling to make the real baby jealous

Nice, we've already got the airbnb bed ready for you, also free food as much as you can eat. Not for Munchables though. Too expensive that guy.

<3 <3 Vanisher

# ? Sep 24, 2019 11:08

Goons Are Gifts

It's almost Wednesday, is it still not reading the eviction notice??

I say sue that fucker

# ? Sep 24, 2019 12:01

Heather Papps: hello friend

SQUATTERS RIGHTS this eviction is unlawful

thanks Dumb Sex-Parrot and deep dish peat moss for this winter bounty!

# ? Sep 24, 2019 13:58

Randy Travesty: PHANTOM QUEEN

BABY GET OUT
BABY GET OUT
seriously I hope she comes soon, your wife needs a break already

# ? Sep 24, 2019 14:07

Heather Papps: hello friend

sincere post: your wife is a tank for sure this is an incredible feat of endurance!

thanks Dumb Sex-Parrot and deep dish peat moss for this winter bounty!

# ? Sep 24, 2019 14:10

Uxzuigal: Chill Berserker Dude

Goons Are Great posted:

It's almost Wednesday, is it still not reading the eviction notice??

I say sue that fucker

We are on the way to Pennywise' office right now. No mercy. It's time to get the balloon on!

hamjobs posted:

BABY GET OUT
BABY GET OUT
seriously I hope she comes soon, your wife needs a break already

Heather Papps posted:

sincere post: your wife is a tank for sure this is an incredible feat of endurance!

It's crazy, she has been amazing this entire time, no complaints, never sick - perfect pregnancy, if the birth goes equally smooth - it's a world record tbh.

<3 <3 Vanisher

# ? Sep 24, 2019 16:45

Pot Smoke Phoenix: Smoke 'em if you gottem!

I would use this against her later on when she's older.

"Go to your room!"

"NO!"

"Why not? You didn't seem to mind staying in the womb before you were born!" :smuggo:

# ? Sep 24, 2019 16:48

Randy Travesty: PHANTOM QUEEN

DOCTOR PENNYWISE, EVICT THAT LITTLE BABY

# ? Sep 24, 2019 17:34

canyoneer: I only have canyoneyes for you

no shirt
no shoes
no cervix

# ? Sep 24, 2019 17:38

Randy Travesty: PHANTOM QUEEN

canyoneer posted:

no shirt
no shoes
no cervix

That literally made my everything die

# ? Sep 24, 2019 17:54

Heather Papps: hello friend

canyoneer posted:

no shirt
no shoes
no cervix

thanks Dumb Sex-Parrot and deep dish peat moss for this winter bounty!

# ? Sep 24, 2019 18:08

alnilam

canyoneer posted:

no shirt
no shoes
no cervix

_{ty manifisto}

# ? Sep 24, 2019 18:10

nut

canyoneer posted:

no shirt
no shoes
no cervix

# ? Sep 24, 2019 18:18

Uxzuigal: Chill Berserker Dude

canyoneer posted:

no shirt
no shoes
no cervix

<3 <3 Vanisher

# ? Sep 24, 2019 21:50

lost my old email

when you having this baby dude, tomorrow? you having a baby tomorrow dude? you gonna love it and poo poo, dude? you gonna nurture it and watch it develop into its own person and poo poo? dude? this loving guy i swear to god. bet he's gonna feel fulfilled as a person. bet he's gonna feel complete and like his life has meaning now. for fucks sake

_{_{_{_{_{_{woooooo tiny shout out to deaf sex woooooooo it is spooky and i should have slept more posting up a storm this night wooooooooooooo i say. tiny shout out to mocking quantum also that guy rules. whoooooooooooo}}}}}}

# ? Sep 24, 2019 21:58

google THIS

canyoneer posted:

no shirt
no shoes
no cervix

# ? Sep 24, 2019 22:08

Uxzuigal: Chill Berserker Dude

lost my old email posted:

when you having this baby dude, tomorrow? you having a baby tomorrow dude? you gonna love it and poo poo, dude? you gonna nurture it and watch it develop into its own person and poo poo? dude? this loving guy i swear to god. bet he's gonna feel fulfilled as a person. bet he's gonna feel complete and like his life has meaning now. for fucks sake

That, or I am gonna feel exhausted for the next 18 years.