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was driving my lady to work and the furry little idiot ran out right in front of my car. i know theyre just kinda cute vermin and i actually kinda hate them for killing all my sunflowers this summer, but i still feel kinda bad about it. a few weeks ago i was in my yard shooting a bow at a target and one of the idiots nearly ran into the path of an in flight arrow. missed it by like half a foot. i would have felt really bad about that one. point is, squirrels are dumb as hell
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Sep 21, 2019 19:13
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Sep 21, 2019 19:16
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gypsys knew!
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Sep 21, 2019 19:19
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OP I hope you shoot yourself in the face with your “tactical hunting bow”
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Sep 21, 2019 19:20
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Squirrels suck, had some in my attic in 2017. gently caress them. Literally, gently caress that dead squirrel, OP. And then kill more.
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Sep 21, 2019 19:21
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Do it ironically posted:OP I hope you shoot yourself in the face with your “tactical hunting bow” It's a basic recurve that I shoot cardboard boxes with, but thanks jackass
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Sep 21, 2019 19:23
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that squirrel almost took an arrow to the knee
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Sep 21, 2019 19:30
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Sep 21, 2019 19:38
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LabyaMynora posted:Literally, gently caress that dead squirrel, OP. Literally gently caress the dead squirrel?
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Sep 21, 2019 19:39
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In a couple more years you can just get a self-driving car that will automatically swerve to miss the squirrel and plow through a little old lady instead
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Sep 21, 2019 19:40
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r u ready to WALK posted:In a couple more years you can just get a self-driving car that will automatically swerve to miss the squirrel and plow through a little old lady instead A fair trade
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Sep 21, 2019 19:41
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beanieson posted:Literally gently caress the dead squirrel? LITERALLY - gently caress that dead squirrel. I mean it. I want the OP to get a murderboner for squirrels. I want him to become the Jeffrey Dahmer of squirrels. I want him to kill squirrels, gently caress their corpses, and then eat them. And then do it again, over and over, until there are no squirrels left.
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Sep 21, 2019 19:42
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r u ready to WALK posted:In a couple more years you can just get a self-driving car that will automatically swerve to miss the squirrel and plow through a little old lady instead Man, gently caress those boomers. (not literally)
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Sep 21, 2019 19:42
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I've hit a squirrel with my car before too. Saw it motionless in my rearview. But when I returned like 20 minutes later it was gone. So either it was just stunned and ran away or one of my neighbours had squirrel for dinner that night
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Sep 21, 2019 19:44
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My squirrels actually planted sunflower seeds from my birdfeeder everywhere this spring. Every potted plant and flowerbed within 100 yards of the feeder was full of sunflowers. Thanks, cute little idiots.
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Sep 21, 2019 19:45
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Roundup Ready posted:was driving my lady to work and the furry little idiot ran out right in front of my car. i know theyre just kinda cute vermin and i actually kinda hate them for killing all my sunflowers this summer, but i still feel kinda bad about it. When I was in high school, a friend was driving their car at about 40 mph after dark, and a cat ran out into the road. They swerved too sharply, missed the cat but then they over corrected and we ended up in the ditch, upside down facing the other way. Better the squirrel than your car I guess? I'd swerve to avoid a pig or something larger, but if it's a bunny and I'm driving down the road at highway speeds, I'll attempt to dodge it if possible, but it's not worth wrecking a car over. The accident was kind of rad actually though
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Sep 21, 2019 19:49
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May god have mercy on your soul for killing one of his sacred creatures. And god have mercy on all the cheerleading going on itt.
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Sep 21, 2019 19:49
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Squirrels are cool little guys, you shouldn't wantonly murder them just because you technically have the right of way, OP.
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Sep 21, 2019 19:50
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Squirrels do not fear death and according to squirrel folklore that lil guy is in squirrelhalla now eating birdseed w/ his ancestors.
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Sep 21, 2019 19:54
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Broken Machine posted:Better the squirrel than your car I guess? You might think this is reasonable but the rest of them will always know what you did https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RXsVKJpTQDk You will never find peace
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Sep 21, 2019 19:55
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yeah well there's a gopher that's loving with my entire life right now and also taunting me like in Caddyshack
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Sep 21, 2019 20:01
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Away all Goats posted:I've hit a squirrel with my car before too. Saw it motionless in my rearview. But when I returned like 20 minutes later it was gone. So either it was just stunned and ran away or one of my neighbours had squirrel for dinner that night Couple weeks ago i ran over one on my way to work. Went past the following day and it was pounded into the tarmac, flat as a pancake. Squirrels are dumb.
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Sep 21, 2019 20:03
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You ever shoot over your fence and hit your neighbor?
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Sep 21, 2019 20:03
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I am not a bowcop I promise
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Sep 21, 2019 20:04
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I haven't hit one in a while, but the idiot little suicidal maniacs sure to love to push their luck.
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Sep 21, 2019 20:07
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i WAS DRIVING LIKE 30 MPH once and a small bird flew in front of my car straight on. Instead of getting run over I watched as this bird did a 180 horizontally in midair and flew away unharmed.
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Sep 21, 2019 20:09
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Tom Gorman posted:yeah well there's a gopher that's loving with my entire life right now and also taunting me like in Caddyshack https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RlLEZdplSmA https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2n-AXKEdPUg
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Sep 21, 2019 20:13
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eh I don't wanna use traps. i'll do it the natural way and just release a bunch of stuff in my backyard that eats gophers. venomous snakes or something.
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Sep 21, 2019 20:23
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Did you get its nuts?
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Sep 21, 2019 20:31
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I call squirrels "tree rats".
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Sep 21, 2019 20:34
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I ran over one a month or two ago, even after braking and swerving to try avoiding it. It's weird how you could feel the crunch through the car's frame. I looked down from my balcony to see if it was still there an hour later and it was on someone else's balcony. I guess some crows had some fun with it before chowing down, but that musta sucked for whoever's apartment that is.
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Sep 21, 2019 20:36
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In high school my girlfriend had a former highway patrol cat as her first car. One of those late 80's Crown Victorias with a hood the size of a football field. We're driving one day under this huge oak tree and BAM, loving squirrel kamikazes right onto the middle of the hood from like 40 feet. Ever since I figure the little bastards want to die. Also, I hit a groundhog last winter at like 50 mph. I'd never seem one before so I stopped. Little fella just shook his head for a minute and scrambled off into the ditch. Hard as gently caress he was.
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Sep 21, 2019 20:45
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After years of searching I finally found a brand of squirrel-proof birdfeeder that actually lives up to its claims. Fuzzy little bastards now leave the feeders alone now that they've been thwarted. Take that, you birdfeeder-ruining assholes.
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Sep 21, 2019 20:49
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 This type of all-steel feeder that snaps shut with too much weight on the perch has totally solved all my squirrel problems, and it keeps the pigeons and grackles away as well. I've got one with an adjustable counterweight though.
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Sep 21, 2019 20:59
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https://www.amazon.com/Squirrel-Bus...69096129&sr=8-1 The squirrel buster hangs out on a greased pole, so they have to do a shimmying jump to even get on it, and then their own weight shuts the seed ports. The furry little shits are left waiting around on the ground, hoping that the birds will occasionally feel generous and drop detritus on them. As it should be.
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Sep 21, 2019 21:04
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In case you do hit one with an arrow now you won't have to let it go to waste. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gqo_GbzCjmg
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Sep 21, 2019 21:07
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earlier this summer I was sitting out on the balcony watching the squirrels go around their squirrel business up in the trees. Sometimes you can see them curl up in the joint between two of the bigger branches and chill out for a while. Squirrels are pretty dang cool imo.
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Sep 21, 2019 21:08
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I’m the squirrel that dashes left then right then left as my 4K lb suv approaches at speeds he can not attain
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Sep 21, 2019 21:15
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Debunk This! posted:earlier this summer I was sitting out on the balcony watching the squirrels go around their squirrel business up in the trees. You know what pairs on good a summer day while squirrel watching? A nice squirrel melt 
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Sep 21, 2019 21:32
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Hometown Slime Queen posted:After years of searching I finally found a brand of squirrel-proof birdfeeder that actually lives up to its claims. Fuzzy little bastards now leave the feeders alone now that they've been thwarted. Just mix hot sauce and water in a spray bottle. Birds aren't bothered by capsaicin, but squirrels loving hate it
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Sep 21, 2019 21:33
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