- Goons Are Gifts
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guild navigator [coughing from inside hotbox]: poo poo. okay, it's time
autopilot: time, yes sir. time for what?
navigator: time for me to loving FOLD SPACE
autopilot: that sound intense
navigator: *sblurble* WITH MY loving MIND
autopilot (surreptitously inputting holtzman coordinates): that sounds dangerous. how can you do it safely?
navigator: WITH THE POWER OF WEED I AM A GOD
autopilot (pressing "execute" button): tell me more
navigator: okay, so in order to understand interdimensional travel, you need to know [rambles for three hours about cannabinoid resonance at a quantum level with holtzman fields, punctuated by massive bong rips]
navigator: now, as to safety, it is an inherent property of indica blends that--
[crew member pokes head in door, gives autopilot a covert thumbs up to indicate safe arrival]
autopilot: astonishing sir, you have done it AGAIN! truly miraculous!
navigator: . . . . . . thank you. thank you.
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Dec 6, 2019 17:31
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