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Davros1
Jul 19, 2007

You've got to admit, you are kind of implausible



https://twitter.com/EvilUno/status/1240446926752972802?s=20

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Blaise330
Aug 13, 2007

GOD'S FAVORITE CHAMPION

Oh, thanks for letting us know.

Xerzes
May 16, 2012


Rarity
Oct 21, 2010

~*4 LIFE*~
This still doesn't mean that J-Ru isn't the Exalted One :thunkher:

coconono
Aug 11, 2004

KISS ME KRIS

is that why J-Ru won't drink the 4loko

Cavauro
Jan 9, 2008

the egg salted one.

The ex-al ted one. (The person who used to be named al but is now named ted.)

Lamuella
Jun 26, 2003

It's like goldy or bronzy, but made of iron.


A large, tedious Corsican. The XL Tedone.

Cavauro
Jan 9, 2008

drat

Oil!
Nov 5, 2008

Der's e'rl in dem der hills!


Ham Wrangler
It is a important to remember that social distancing doesn't mean slacking off and we only have a week or so to close out the month and have a successful Q1.

https://twitter.com/EvilUno/status/1242593772346671109?s=20

Rarity
Oct 21, 2010

~*4 LIFE*~
Hey folks, I know that everyone's feeling a bit on edge after last night but I've spoken to Uno and he assures me that Mr. Brodie remains very happy with our work and no one is at risk of being powerbombed like #8. He just wants us to keep up our metrics through April and everything will be fine. All hail the Exalted One.

Lamuella
Jun 26, 2003

It's like goldy or bronzy, but made of iron.


Rarity posted:

Hey folks, I know that everyone's feeling a bit on edge after last night but I've spoken to Uno and he assures me that Mr. Brodie remains very happy with our work and no one is at risk of being powerbombed like #8. He just wants us to keep up our metrics through April and everything will be fine. All hail the Exalted One.

All Hail Mr Brodie.

Lid
Feb 18, 2005

And the mercy seat is awaiting,
And I think my head is burning,
And in a way I'm yearning,
To be done with all this measuring of proof.
An eye for an eye
And a tooth for a tooth,
And anyway I told the truth,
And I'm not afraid to die.
The Dark Order is a cult, and not a cool apocalypse one its like you're part of NXIVM or CrossFit

Lamuella
Jun 26, 2003

It's like goldy or bronzy, but made of iron.


Lid posted:

The Dark Order is a cult, and not a cool apocalypse one its like you're part of NXIVM or CrossFit

Mr Brodie? Mr Brodie?!?

Rarity
Oct 21, 2010

~*4 LIFE*~

Lid posted:

The Dark Order is a cult, and not a cool apocalypse one its like you're part of NXIVM or CrossFit

The Dark Order is not a cult. I know it's not cause Uno told me so :unsmith:

ChrisBTY
Mar 29, 2012

this glorious monument

Ok yeah I never actually jumped on the Dark Order train and now I want off the Dark Order train anyway. When your boss can be described as 'Mr. McMahon but evil' you've found yourself in a lovely life situation.

Senerio
Oct 19, 2009

Roëmænce is ælive!
Mr. Brodie is "Mr. McMahon but less evil" I'll have you know.

Rarity
Oct 21, 2010

~*4 LIFE*~

ChrisBTY posted:

Ok yeah I never actually jumped on the Dark Order train and now I want off the Dark Order train anyway. When your boss can be described as 'Mr. McMahon but evil' you've found yourself in a lovely life situation.

I have contacted Uno, some friends will be with you shortly for your Reintegration Support :)

DeathChicken
Jul 9, 2012

Nonsense. I have not yet begun to defile myself.

If anything Brodie screams less while getting upset about trivial insanity

Gaz-L
Jan 28, 2009
This is the WORST CULT I've EVER BEEN IN.

*spraypaints ankh and letters SCU on wall before bailing*

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

Vince MechMahon
Jan 1, 2008



Hey guys, I coughed on the zoom meeting with the exalted one earlier today and then he drove to my house and powerbombed me through my own coffee table.

rantmo
Jul 30, 2003

A smile better suits a hero



Vince MechMahon posted:

Hey guys, I coughed on the zoom meeting with the exalted one earlier today and then he drove to my house and powerbombed me through my own coffee table.

Good.

Procrastinator
Aug 16, 2009

what?


has anybody here won a wrestling match since joining the dark order? asking for a friend.

Rarity
Oct 21, 2010

~*4 LIFE*~

Procrastinator posted:

has anybody here won a wrestling match since joining the dark order? asking for a friend.

I have won many wrestling matches. Unfortunately none of these were recorded but I assure you they took place.

Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?

Procrastinator posted:

has anybody here won a wrestling match since joining the dark order? asking for a friend.

You're looking at it the wrong way. Has anybody LOST a wrestling match since joining The Dark Order?

reignofevil
Nov 7, 2008
I think the true victory was the friends revenge we made along the way.

Rarity
Oct 21, 2010

~*4 LIFE*~
Hi folks, I've been talking to Uno and unfortunately I have some sad news. As we all know the coronavirus is having an impact on Dark Order operations and at this point in time we don't have the resources to sustain our current levels of creeper headcount. The Dark Order is a family and therefore we are all really saddened to have to say that some members will not be able to maintain their creeper status. The following names will have to turn in their masks and cease all Dark Order functions: Lamuella, coconono, Writer Cath, Punch McLightning and Malcolm Excellent. I know that this is a difficult time for all of us so if anyone has any questions about this they are very welcome to speak to me at any time.

WE ARE ONE (APART FROM THOSE OF US WHO ARE NOT)

Senerio
Oct 19, 2009

Roëmænce is ælive!
Please remember that this is a trying time, and I am seeing a lot of negativity against the Exalted One, but we should all band together, unite and support The Exalted One as best we can!

WE ARE ONE! (Mostly)

Lamuella
Jun 26, 2003

It's like goldy or bronzy, but made of iron.


Hi, I just want to say how hurt I personally am in the aftermath of this decision that other creepers are not being supportive enough towards Mr Brodie. You don't know how hard this has been for him. I think after evening chores and before late evening chores we should take two minutes out of our generous five minute rest break to applaud Mr Brodie for his leadership.

WE ARE ONE (and by "we" I mean real people, not the fakes and losers)

Rarity
Oct 21, 2010

~*4 LIFE*~

Lamuella posted:

Hi, I just want to say how hurt I personally am in the aftermath of this decision that other creepers are not being supportive enough towards Mr Brodie. You don't know how hard this has been for him. I think after evening chores and before late evening chores we should take two minutes out of our generous five minute rest break to applaud Mr Brodie for his leadership.

WE ARE ONE (and by "we" I mean real people, not the fakes and losers)

I also wanted to add how kind of you it was to stay on for the next month of duties while forgoing all Dark Order benefits. Hopefully once this current situation is behind us we will be able to bring you back in to the family (dependent on wider economic factors, naturally)

Lamuella
Jun 26, 2003

It's like goldy or bronzy, but made of iron.


Rarity posted:

I also wanted to add how kind of you it was to stay on for the next month of duties while forgoing all Dark Order benefits. Hopefully once this current situation is behind us we will be able to bring you back in to the family (dependent on wider economic factors, naturally)

*turns in mask*

*immediately puts on homemade secondary mask*

Malcolm Excellent
May 20, 2007

Buglord
Ohhh crabapples!

Punch McLightning
Sep 19, 2005

you know what that means




Grimey Drawer

Rarity posted:

Hi folks, I've been talking to Uno and unfortunately I have some sad news. As we all know the coronavirus is having an impact on Dark Order operations and at this point in time we don't have the resources to sustain our current levels of creeper headcount. The Dark Order is a family and therefore we are all really saddened to have to say that some members will not be able to maintain their creeper status. The following names will have to turn in their masks and cease all Dark Order functions: Lamuella, coconono, Writer Cath, Punch McLightning and Malcolm Excellent. I know that this is a difficult time for all of us so if anyone has any questions about this they are very welcome to speak to me at any time.

WE ARE ONE (APART FROM THOSE OF US WHO ARE NOT)

I really appreciate the Dark Order making me feel like a part of a family, even if it's one that's occasionally sidewalk slammed by Mr. Brodie. I gave my best for this organization and I know everyone did their best for me. It's a difficult time all around, but I know that Mr. Brodie will led the Dark Order forward with the help of wonderful people like Evil Uno and Stu Grayson.

I'll now be taking independent bookings as Strike O'Mesocyclone, if anyone has some henchman work that's available.

Lid
Feb 18, 2005

And the mercy seat is awaiting,
And I think my head is burning,
And in a way I'm yearning,
To be done with all this measuring of proof.
An eye for an eye
And a tooth for a tooth,
And anyway I told the truth,
And I'm not afraid to die.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SB7cO7ckjQQ

Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?

Man, I really dig that, especially the "join us".

Rarity
Oct 21, 2010

~*4 LIFE*~
https://twitter.com/YTAlexReynolds/status/1257822257864478721

Another Dark Order success story!

coconono
Aug 11, 2004

KISS ME KRIS

all I got was a loose tooth when MR Brodie LEE kicked me as a warmup to his match.

Rarity
Oct 21, 2010

~*4 LIFE*~

coconono posted:

all I got was a loose tooth when MR Brodie LEE kicked me as a warmup to his match.

It's ok, Britt told me that tooth was actually full of cavities

Oil!
Nov 5, 2008

Der's e'rl in dem der hills!


Ham Wrangler

Time to file those tuition reimbursement forms.

Rarity
Oct 21, 2010

~*4 LIFE*~
I just want to congratulate everyone in this thread for being ahead of the game on the biggest babyface faction in AEW :hai:

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Punch McLightning
Sep 19, 2005

you know what that means




Grimey Drawer
V just emailed me and said my application was approved.

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