Hostile Makeover

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Escape From Noise

Hostile Makeover is a show in which covert ops beauticians disappear contestants to a black site spa to give them the makeover of a lifetime! Friends and family won't even recognize them after they're returned but after some convincing the missing persons reports get reversed. Most of the time.

"Call off the search parties and meet the new you!"

# ? Dec 26, 2019 04:15

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# ? Apr 29, 2024 00:42

The X-man cometh

Fingernails are soooo passé

# ? Dec 26, 2019 04:18

xcheopis

Co-workers call the police when I return on the grounds that there is no way this well-groomed woman pleasantly helping a client is their much-beloved [xcheopis].

# ? Dec 26, 2019 04:19

google THIS

Now this is our signature facial, and I think you'll find it very, very, very hydrating.

# ? Dec 26, 2019 04:21

PHIZ KALIFA: #mood

dropping sam fisher style from a bathroom air duct and assisting a lady with her contouring before an important interview

crimes

# ? Dec 26, 2019 04:26

tradjik

drive by body pierce

ty heather papps u da bes

# ? Dec 26, 2019 04:51

xcheopis

tradjik posted:

drive by body pierce

They gave a glitter gun! Get the kids in the house!

# ? Dec 26, 2019 04:56

tradjik

xcheopis posted:

They gave a glitter gun! Get the kids in the house!

they won't make MY kids into emotion havers

ty heather papps u da bes

# ? Dec 26, 2019 05:01

PHIZ KALIFA: #mood

imagine the old queer eye crew meeting up for One Last Job and it's murdering Bin Laden.

crimes

# ? Dec 26, 2019 05:05

owlhawk911: come chill with me, in byob

on the run, living on the edge, forced to the fringes of society because of my beliefs

i will NEVER shave, or stop wearing sweatpants

https://giant.gfycat.com/PlasticAngryHousefly.webm
_{this sig a mf'n vanisher joint. gobbos by khanstant}

# ? Dec 26, 2019 05:31

owlhawk911: come chill with me, in byob

obfuscating my identity with carefully chosen fashion accessories, clothing and hygiene products to avoid the makeover squads

https://giant.gfycat.com/PlasticAngryHousefly.webm
_{this sig a mf'n vanisher joint. gobbos by khanstant}

# ? Dec 26, 2019 05:35

Luvcow: One day nearer spring

The X-man cometh posted:

Fingernails are soooo passé

# ? Dec 26, 2019 05:38

xcheopis

"Hostile Makeover" is what my cat calls those vet visits just to trim his drat claws.

# ? Dec 26, 2019 05:42

Escape From Noise

owlhawk911 posted:

on the run, living on the edge, forced to the fringes of society because of my beliefs

i will NEVER shave, or stop wearing sweatpants

owlhawk911 posted:

obfuscating my identity with carefully chosen fashion accessories, clothing and hygiene products to avoid the makeover squads

Whoever you are. Wherever you run. Whatever disguises you hide behind they will find you and they WILL make you fabulous!

# ? Dec 26, 2019 06:05

City of Glompton

lol @ this thread

# ? Dec 26, 2019 07:45

Escape From Noise

For years I have honed my body and cultivated my mind with one singular purpose. To become the perfect instrument of beautification.

Escape From Noise fucked around with this message at 09:55 on Dec 26, 2019

# ? Dec 26, 2019 08:12

Goons Are Gifts

xcheopis posted:

"Hostile Makeover" is what my cat calls those vet visits just to trim his drat claws.

lol

# ? Dec 26, 2019 14:44

catapede: Eatin' fish leaves
Gettin' strong

You fall through a trap hole during a walk and land in a salon chair. Restraints immediately close upon your wrists and ankles. A team of beauticians emerge from the shadows. An exceptionally fabulous person steps forward while snapping on a glove, "They say beauty is pain, and we aim to displease."

# ? Dec 26, 2019 16:05

The X-man cometh

The Military-Beautiful Complex.

# ? Dec 26, 2019 17:40

Slush Garbo: FALSE SLACK
is
BETTER
than
NO SLACK

PHIZ KALIFA posted:

imagine the old queer eye crew meeting up for One Last Job and it's murdering Bin Laden.

# ? Dec 26, 2019 18:28

google THIS

Fashion Accomplished

# ? Dec 26, 2019 18:41

xcheopis

google THIS posted:

Fashion Accomplished

Fashion Accomplice, sidekick for the supervillain Designer Gene.

# ? Dec 26, 2019 18:45

City of Glompton

google THIS posted:

Now this is our signature facial, and I think you'll find it very, very, very hydrating.

thank you PSP for the beautiful spring sig

# ? Dec 26, 2019 18:45

City of Glompton

been getting really into North Korean skin care routines

thank you PSP for the beautiful spring sig

# ? Dec 26, 2019 18:46

City of Glompton

# ? Dec 26, 2019 19:10

Escape From Noise

City of Glompton posted:

# ? Dec 26, 2019 19:11

xcheopis

City of Glompton posted:

# ? Dec 26, 2019 19:13

owlhawk911: come chill with me, in byob

City of Glompton posted:

https://giant.gfycat.com/PlasticAngryHousefly.webm
_{this sig a mf'n vanisher joint. gobbos by khanstant}

# ? Dec 26, 2019 19:28

tradjik

wake up nananana make up
keys on table fable wanted to

ty heather papps u da bes

# ? Dec 26, 2019 19:32

Queen-Of-Hearts: "I want to break your heart💔 and give you mine🫀"

City of Glompton posted:

:h: sig by Prof. Crocodile :h:
:byodame: BYOB spells: Mutually Assured Kindness

# ? Dec 26, 2019 20:14

Finger Prince

tradjik posted:

drive by body pierce

There's a destination a little up the road
From the barber shops and salons we know
A place we saw the highlights turn low
Deathsquad dye and a jet fresh blow

Pulling out weaves and retinoid face wash
False eyelashes and a microblade
Bottles and cans of product on your hands and blood on your hands

# ? Dec 26, 2019 20:53

alnilam

Finger Prince posted:

There's a destination a little up the road
From the barber shops and salons we know
A place we saw the highlights turn low
Deathsquad dye and a jet fresh blow

Pulling out weaves and retinoid face wash
False eyelashes and a microblade
Bottles and cans of product on your hands and blood on your hands

# ? Dec 26, 2019 21:02

Luvcow: One day nearer spring

City of Glompton posted:

Finger Prince posted:

There's a destination a little up the road
From the barber shops and salons we know
A place we saw the highlights turn low
Deathsquad dye and a jet fresh blow

Pulling out weaves and retinoid face wash
False eyelashes and a microblade
Bottles and cans of product on your hands and blood on your hands

# ? Dec 26, 2019 21:09

Slush Garbo: FALSE SLACK
is
BETTER
than
NO SLACK

City of Glompton posted:

Finger Prince posted:

There's a destination a little up the road
From the barber shops and salons we know
A place we saw the highlights turn low
Deathsquad dye and a jet fresh blow

Pulling out weaves and retinoid face wash
False eyelashes and a microblade
Bottles and cans of product on your hands and blood on your hands

# ? Dec 26, 2019 22:13

SardonicTyrant: BTICH IM A NEWT
熱くなれ夢みた明日を
必ずいつかつかまえる
走り出せ振り向くことなく
&

That time the Queer Eye team assassinated Bin Laden.

# ? Dec 26, 2019 22:23

tradjik

that's kind of hectic

ty heather papps u da bes

# ? Dec 26, 2019 23:17

Manifisto

now then, blowout team A: sharpshooters will be positioned at points alpha and bravo. as soon as the motorcade reaches point charlie, both shooters will fire at the target's left front tire. in the event of a double miss, the backups will be prepared with caltrops and, if necessary, the bazooka.

blowout team B: the generators go live at t minus one minute. the target is to be extracted from the vehicle without delay and presented with warm scented facial towels. shampoo squad will clean and massage for exactly three minutes, followed by pressurized rinse and activation of primary hairdryer squad. auxiliary hairdryer squad is to be primed and ready to step in the moment anything goes wrong. meanwhile, team A will provide suppressing fire for any hostiles who attempt to interfere with the operation. manicure squad will await further instructions pending assessment of the target.

all good? I said, all good? very well then: EXECUTE.

ty nesamdoom!

# ? Dec 26, 2019 23:26

google THIS

My grandma's YouTube channel got demonetized during the Summer Clothing Haulocaust.

# ? Dec 26, 2019 23:33

El Spider

Excerpt from Tom Clancy's "Ghosted Recon"

The team had been operating as two six-person units: Kim K. and Jeffree Star, with all radio call signs beginning with the letter R. Marissa would exploit her division in order to provide concealer for assisting the cosmetologically wounded.

Another whistle rose in the night, this time closer, and suddenly the next lip bomb exploded, rainbow smoke and more glitter hurtling up through the canopy.

�Rachet, this is RuPual,� called the team�s assistant medical sergeant, Thomas �RuPaul� McDaniel. �Me and Rochelle are good to go, but Randy is gone, girlfriend. Hit by that last lip bomb. This bitch is ashy as gently caress!�

There wasn�t time to tally up the needy. All Marissa knew was that she needed support�Hair, Nails, anything�and she needed it now. She acknowledged RuPaul�s call, then switched frequencies, calling up Captain Charlotte Duong�s Vietnamese team. They were much closer than the Korean team and were working the grid on the other side of the creek. �Honey 06, this is Rachet, over.�

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This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!

# ? Dec 27, 2019 00:56

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# ? Apr 29, 2024 00:42

alexandriao

rms ninja-fighting the hostile makeoverers

# ? Dec 27, 2019 00:57

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