Hostile Makeover

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City of Glompton

El Spider posted:

Excerpt from Tom Clancy's "Ghosted Recon"

The team had been operating as two six-person units: Kim K. and Jeffree Star, with all radio call signs beginning with the letter R. Marissa would exploit her division in order to provide concealer for assisting the cosmetologically wounded.

Another whistle rose in the night, this time closer, and suddenly the next lip bomb exploded, rainbow smoke and more glitter hurtling up through the canopy.

�Rachet, this is RuPual,� called the team�s assistant medical sergeant, Thomas �RuPaul� McDaniel. �Me and Rochelle are good to go, but Randy is gone, girlfriend. Hit by that last lip bomb. This bitch is ashy as gently caress!�

There wasn�t time to tally up the needy. All Marissa knew was that she needed support�Hair, Nails, anything�and she needed it now. She acknowledged RuPaul�s call, then switched frequencies, calling up Captain Charlotte Duong�s Vietnamese team. They were much closer than the Korean team and were working the grid on the other side of the creek. �Honey 06, this is Rachet, over.�

thank you PSP for the beautiful spring sig

# ? Dec 27, 2019 02:24

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Apr 29, 2024 06:13

GODSPEED JOHN GLENN: I put my thumb up my bum and shut one eye, and my thumb blotted out the planet Earth.

Conceal Team Six

# ? Dec 27, 2019 02:31

cda: by Hand Knit

GODSPEED JOHN GLENN posted:

Conceal Team Six

Jesus loving Christ dude

# ? Dec 27, 2019 03:17

alnilam

GODSPEED JOHN GLENN posted:

Conceal Team Six

# ? Dec 27, 2019 03:20

Escape From Noise

GODSPEED JOHN GLENN posted:

Conceal Team Six

# ? Dec 27, 2019 03:28

tradjik

i have no idea what this thread is about anymore

ty heather papps u da bes

# ? Dec 27, 2019 03:39

xcheopis

tradjik posted:

i have no idea what this thread is about anymore

We're learning a new definition for "browbeaten".

# ? Dec 27, 2019 03:41

Escape From Noise

tradjik posted:

i have no idea what this thread is about anymore

Welcome to the

Y
O
B

The handcuffs click around your wrist as you hear a blow-dryer start.

# ? Dec 27, 2019 03:42

owlhawk911: come chill with me, in byob

Beautify Your Opponents Brutally

https://giant.gfycat.com/PlasticAngryHousefly.webm
_{this sig a mf'n vanisher joint. gobbos by khanstant}

# ? Dec 27, 2019 03:44

tradjik

SweetWillyRollbar posted:

Welcome to the

Y
O
B

The handcuffs click around your wrist as you hear a blow-dryer start.

i don't appreciate handcuffs or blow driers i will post over there with the lock pickers. drat handcuffs

ty heather papps u da bes

# ? Dec 27, 2019 03:45

owlhawk911: come chill with me, in byob

tradjik posted:

i don't appreciate handcuffs or blow driers i will post over there with the lock pickers. drat handcuffs

my dude...

https://giant.gfycat.com/PlasticAngryHousefly.webm
_{this sig a mf'n vanisher joint. gobbos by khanstant}

# ? Dec 27, 2019 04:01

owlhawk911: come chill with me, in byob

you're about to be loving beautiful

https://giant.gfycat.com/PlasticAngryHousefly.webm
_{this sig a mf'n vanisher joint. gobbos by khanstant}

# ? Dec 27, 2019 04:03

tradjik

owlhawk911 posted:

you're about to be loving beautiful

this sounds cool but is also confusing and scary. have fun itt

ty heather papps u da bes

# ? Dec 27, 2019 04:04

canyoneer: I only have canyoneyes for you

I don’t have money. But what I do have are a very particular set of skills; skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. I will look for you, I will find you, and I will make you love the look of a confident, new you.

# ? Dec 27, 2019 05:02

canyoneer: I only have canyoneyes for you

a powerful man who offended the mafia goes to sleep.
he wakes up the next morning in his golden silk sheets with an uneasy feeling. he follows a trail of dark hairs down the bed and finds a hand mirror. he looks into it and sees that in the night his eyebrows have been plucked into a perfect soft angled arch.
the man screams.

# ? Dec 27, 2019 05:07

Escape From Noise

Do you expect me to talk?

No, Mr. Bond, I expect you to dye.

# ? Dec 27, 2019 07:06

tradjik

tradjik posted:

drive by body pierce

ty heather papps u da bes

# ? Dec 27, 2019 09:43

ChubbyChecker

City of Glompton posted:

# ? Dec 27, 2019 11:24

Escape From Noise

Using a smoky eye bomb on a crowd.

# ? Dec 27, 2019 11:28

Twenty Four

The staff playing the high energy Pantera song "loving Hostile" on repeat over the speakers during your "relaxing" spa day.

# ? Dec 27, 2019 14:11

catapede: Eatin' fish leaves
Gettin' strong

The Mary KGB

# ? Dec 27, 2019 14:22

Slush Garbo: FALSE SLACK
is
BETTER
than
NO SLACK

catapede posted:

The Mary KGB

# ? Dec 27, 2019 14:29

HUSKY DILF: aggressively chill

SweetWillyRollbar posted:

Do you expect me to talk?

No, Mr. Bond, I expect you to dye.

# ? Dec 27, 2019 14:45

xcheopis

SweetWillyRollbar posted:

Do you expect me to talk?

No, Mr. Bond, I expect you to dye.

# ? Dec 27, 2019 14:51

google THIS

And the rocket's red glare
The bombs bursting in air
Gave proof through the night
We were rocking that hair

# ? Dec 27, 2019 16:17

Pot Smoke Phoenix: Smoke 'em if you gottem!

Private First Class Arbright stood firmly at attention, saluting crisply with his eyes shining brightly as he awaited recognition from his commanding officer. General Gaines applied the last touches to PFC Arbright and, standing to attention, returned PFC Arbright's salute.

"You have distinguished yourself, your unit, and the United States Army through your actions. No other soldier has ever accomplished what you have- 25 hours of extended combat duty, 15 casualties to the enemy- and you personally saved 20 of our own people, and not ONCE did your eye makeup run or let you down!

For your actions under fire and bravery in combat, I am proud to award you with the Nation's highest honor- the Congressional Mascara of Honor.

Company, ten-HUT!" the commander shouted, and as one the company stood to attention. They couldn't believe how stunning PFC Arbright's eyes looked. They stood out more than ever! The company swooned. Perhaps the next fire fight they were in one of them would be so lucky to see those eyes rushing toward them, toward danger- to save them from the enemy. And then, award him another honor...

https://i.imgur.com/QKTkerO.mp4
_{_{Sig elements by Manifisto and Heather Papps}}
Sig File protected by SigLock. do NOT steal this sig!

# ? Dec 27, 2019 16:35

Manifisto

SweetWillyRollbar posted:

Do you expect me to talk?

No, Mr. Bond, I expect you to dye.

# ? Dec 27, 2019 17:02

catapede: Eatin' fish leaves
Gettin' strong

Pot Smoke Phoenix posted:

the Congressional Mascara of Honor.

# ? Dec 27, 2019 19:13

HUSKY DILF: aggressively chill

When the nightmares started to come back, which they always did Hank found himself at the VFM after work, grabbing couple cold ones with the boys. Here he could be himself, smoke a pack of Pall Malls by himself like he learned at cosmetology school. Throw some darts, compare old mascara stories, think about the ones that didn�t make it back from that last trip to Nordstrom Rack.

# ? Dec 27, 2019 20:57

google THIS

Screaming every time I hear the buzz of an electric trimmer.

# ? Dec 27, 2019 23:43

SardonicTyrant: BTICH IM A NEWT
熱くなれ夢みた明日を
必ずいつかつかまえる
走り出せ振り向くことなく
&

Veteran of the Hot Lips Wars

# ? Dec 28, 2019 00:07

Escape From Noise

EDC (Everyday Carry):

-1 Elchim 3900 Hair Dryer
-1 Parlux 385 PowerLight Ionic and Ceramic Hair Dryer.
-2 packages hair clips.
-2 portable power supplies (fully charged)
-4 packages of curlers
-1 box nitrile gloves
-1 bleach kit
-3 different mascara bases
-10 shades of lip gloss and lip liner
-7 shades of eye shadow
-1 pair Kohm KP-700 Toenail Clippers
-1 pair nail clippers
-1 pumice stone
-1 cucumber (raw)
-2 tubes exfoliating face scrub
-1 mud pack
-1 bag cotton balls
-1 curling iron
-2 pairs of hair cutting scissors

# ? Dec 28, 2019 20:59

cda: by Hand Knit

SweetWillyRollbar posted:

EDC (Everyday Carry):

EDC forums/threads are the best

# ? Dec 28, 2019 21:02

Escape From Noise

cda posted:

EDC forums/threads are the best

Yeah. Always wild to see some janitor or networks admin is packing like 2 Glocks, extra ammo, and 5 knives, all concealed to work every day.

# ? Dec 28, 2019 21:05

nut

leaked cia documents of enhanced exfoliation techniques on how we took Osama Has-bin Laden to Osama Bin Livin'

# ? Dec 29, 2019 16:10

Pot Smoke Phoenix: Smoke 'em if you gottem!

The submarine USS Bloodbath & Beyond patrolled the Atlantic, looking for threats. One had been located- there was a party near Miami that was detected. The heading was set, and the ship and it's crew headed to the coordinates of the anticipated target. Klaxons aboard the ship began sounding off as the captain made an announcement over the PA

"This is your captain, firing solutions have been entered into the targeting computer, prepare to fire torpedoes, on my command- Three! Two! One! FIRE!"

The torpedoes fired from the torpedo tubes to their destination one by one. Each torpedo contained a warhead that when the destination was reached, would disperse and begin immediately reacting with the surrounding water, bubbling and frothing and sending biodegradable and environmentally harmless scented oils and skin moisturizers to those bathing within. Each torpedo successfully reached their targets...

"Another successful mission, folks! Our mission objectives were met and that party is now kicking into high gear, well done!"

Cheers could be heard from the submarine. The US Navy's plan to weaponize bath bombs was a success...

# ? Dec 29, 2019 16:51