We must repopulate the smurf village!! :(

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > BYOB Goldmine: Gold Mango > We must repopulate the smurf village!! :(

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

Gargamel loving ate all the smurfs, that meanie.

but easy come, easy go; we'll just make more.

magenta smurf

-wrong color
-good at wrangling
-hates the sunlight
-never once seen drinking booze

# ¿ Jan 31, 2020 03:59

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# ¿ May 15, 2024 02:38

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

You can't sex a smurf!! a smurf's smurf isn't compatible with that pathetic little smurf you call a *chuckle* ...smurf

# ¿ Jan 31, 2020 04:36

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

Galaxander posted:

He's so happy to eat the smurfs.

Anyway my idea for a new smurf is Lil' Smurf, the smurf that's small.

and there's big smurg and big smurg and lil smurg are in LOVE and are MARRIED

# ¿ Jan 31, 2020 06:03

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

biosterous posted:

smorf

# ¿ Jan 31, 2020 06:19

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

I'd try Smurf Eggs, tbh

# ¿ Jan 31, 2020 15:21

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

Egg Smurf

-not an egg but rather an egg enthusiast
-smells like sulfur (from over boiling eggs)
-finds living in the village not all what its cracked up to be
-albumin joke

# ¿ Jan 31, 2020 15:23

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

using this space to talk about smurfs for real

I used to love the smurf comics by Peyo. I was introduced to them in French (Les Schtroumpfs, pronounced exactly how it looks). I was put off by English adaptations and the cartoon because it was so saccharine but in the original comics they were always drinking and being lovely

# ¿ Jan 31, 2020 21:39

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

Sexual Smurf

-Sexually awakened

# ¿ Feb 1, 2020 02:09

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

GODSPEED JOHN GLENN posted:

did you make??

# ¿ Feb 1, 2020 16:10

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

Goons Are Great posted:

GSJG is an insanely good artist

thank u to Mr. John Glenn for gracing the thread with ur art!! I think every smurf should at least carry a print of that image on their persons at all times but this is just IMO and not meant to be taken as "fact".

# ¿ Feb 1, 2020 23:24

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

i tried lmao

# ¿ Feb 2, 2020 02:02

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

Sexual Smurf

google THIS posted:

Fully Sexual Smurf

Finger Prince posted:

The Smurf Queen

Finger Prince posted:

Ę̶̜̥̠͈͈̣̀l̵̢̞̠̟̘̆͌͐͆́̃̉ď̶͙̙̘̠̰̪r̸͖͒í̴̖͚͓͋̒̊ẗ̴̨̳̈̑̾͝c̸̲͉̹̩͍͚̓̈́h̴̡̤̬͙͍͗̆͋͘͝ ̷̞͕̥̉̍S̴̪͋͗̆͑̉͜m̵̨̻̘̘̺̜̦̐͝u̸̦͆̒̏r̷̨͈̫̮̠̘͇̿̀f̷̗̫̰̀͋́͌̀͘

# ¿ Feb 2, 2020 04:43

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

lol this thread

# ¿ Feb 4, 2020 16:12

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

and btw, Eldritch Smurf is not one that needs to be sealed or contained in any way. The Smurf village loves him and he, them. : )

Eldritch is a good smurf who routinely does good (he comforts people on their deathbed, reaches out to orphans and refugees, his favorite childhood moments were at a hospital for the disabled, offers his empathy to widows, attends funerals of strangers. His strongest memory is feeding children with leprosy)

# ¿ Feb 4, 2020 16:16

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

no the banner idea happens JERE or helse

# ¿ Feb 4, 2020 20:52

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

okay im calm now.

Tombstone Smurf

-Makes tombstones for the fallen

Mausoleum Smurf

-Builds mausoleums for the fallen

-Catacomb Smurf

-Builds a labyrinthe subterranean hellspace to harvest the energy of the fallen

# ¿ Feb 4, 2020 20:58

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

GODSPEED JOHN GLENN posted:

So, I felt compelled to re-investigate the idea of the Smurf Queen, and maybe I shouldn't have.

yaaaaaas slay (the) queen!!!

Vitamin Me posted:

Guess who

Is it smurfbutt or dicksmurf?

# ¿ Feb 5, 2020 14:14

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

La la lalala laaa sing a happy song

La la lalala laaa pass the smurfin' bong

# ¿ Feb 5, 2020 16:28

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

SweetWillyRollbar posted:

Updated Mario Smurf

-Swears
-Is Christian
-Greek
-Has a gun

<3!

Gamer Smurf

-Is an online activist who advocates for the liberation of anime girl tiddies and asses in his games
-Gets mad at Smurfette because "Smurf Crush and Besmurfed" aren't real games
-even though she has like, Skyrim and beat all the Zeldas and FFVII like chill man
-is a NEET

# ¿ Feb 6, 2020 04:35

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

alnilam posted:

Smurfstar Runner

- R -> W speech impediment
- No arms??
- Guess which name he's going to say next, Smurf Hoffman, or Smurf Frenchman
- Dating Smurfipan

# ¿ Feb 6, 2020 20:41

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

Having just recently rewatched all of Homestar Runner's content, I appreciate these new smurfs a lot. I could seriously listen to those characters talk about anything forever. Especially Strong Sad.

# ¿ Feb 7, 2020 15:15

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

Smurf Sad

-Likes board games more than most Smurfs
-By that, he means he likes to play board more than other Smurfs like to
-But by that, he also means that he likes board games better than he likes most smurfs

# ¿ Feb 7, 2020 17:10

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

I think with the proper support net, Gargamel can be reformed and happily assimilated into the United Smurf Conglomerate.

Cubone posted:

Fucky Smurf

- everybody hates him
- they hate looking at him
- it's not his fault
- didn't ask for this
- doesn't even gently caress that much
- owns a lamp store
- likes lamps
- likes helping people find the right lamp for them
- would prefer to be called "Lampy Smurf"

i would not kick this bed out of smurf for eating crackers inside the bed

# ¿ Feb 9, 2020 15:17

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

Vitamin Me posted:

This thread is great for drawing inspiration

right you are

because of this thread i can draw a smurf without even thinking, smurf forever etched in my mind

# ¿ Feb 12, 2020 00:51

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

a post that is a post but can also be a poem:

sad smurf

-always weeping

mad smurf

-always beeping (as in censored swears)

ballet smurf

-always leaping

fatal familial insomnia smurf

-never sleeping

# ¿ Feb 14, 2020 03:29

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

that game doesn't have starmie in it :/

# ¿ Feb 14, 2020 05:35

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

when bored i consult talk to transformer and it has taught me lots about smurfs. The only question I asked was: "What are all the different smurfs?" and here's what it had to say:

-Everybody has their own smurf. An individual smurf can be identified as belonging to a certain social category.

-Unlike regular trading economies, smurfs aren't in the habit of trading goods with each other. Instead, each smurf has a unique number which is his unique item name, and is either the item or a piece of clothing that smurfs need to appear as though they're that smurf. To have an item that a smurf knows about, a smurf has to wear or have its other item names associated with it. The trade protocol is different for each smurf.

-You can recognize a smurf by the following characteristics: A goofy logo...

-There are three basic types of smurfs: child smurfs (whose parent smurfs are physically attached to them), parent smurfs (which only "recently" got that parent smurf), and external smurfs (which have their own log files, in the canonical location specified for their parent smurfs).

-So, in the snow of December 2016 a smurf was elected leader of Canada.

-In short, a smurf is a nickname assigned to someone who has just registered an account on FFXI. They don't know anything about the game and have probably never even made a real character before.

# ¿ Feb 20, 2020 03:17

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

google THIS posted:

Here is a list of all the smurfs:

- Papa Smurf
- ????????? ??????? ???

- Elf Smurf

- Spider Smurf

- Snails Smurf

- Smelly Joe

- Velociraptor Smurf

- Fighting Smurf

- Lizard Smurf

- Porky Smurf

- Scary Pumpkin Smurf

- Kraken

- Bill Pepper

- Slushie

- Stretch Nelson

- Whom Smurf

- Chocolate Treat

- Peanut Butter Cookie

- Frying Pan

- Clam

- Chuck E Cheese

Holy poo poo all my favorites! Frying Pan always cooking up a storm! Smelly Joe and Bill Pepper always trying zany get-rich-schemes but always being ousted by their distinctive and respective odor and taste, Clam siphoning water, The whimsical Whom Smurf always conjuring up such wonderful poesy and Stretch Nelson... Oh Stretch Nelson!

# ¿ Feb 21, 2020 03:33

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

Welcome to Gargamel's Tasty Treats!

Gargamel's Borscht Schtroumpf:

-2 liters of smurf puree
-2 onions
-2 carrots
-3 potatoes
-12oz canned meat
-20oz broth
-2 tsp salt
-1 tsp pepper
-� tsp worcestershire sauce
-1 cup cream
-3 cups water

Preparation:

Whisk together all the other ingredients in a crock pot or big slow cooker. Place the spinach and onion in the bottom of the crock pot.
Add the carrots, potatoes, meat, puree, and vegetables. Sprinkle the salt, pepper, and spices over everything.

Smurf Gateau:

-4 Smurf Eggs
-4 Protean Hulk
-2 Man-o'-War
-1 Burnout
-2 Titania's Song
-2 Isochron Scepter
-1 Ruric Thar, the Unbowed
-1 Worm Harvest
-4 Magus of the Moon
-4 Brainstorm
-1 Craterhoof Behemoth
-2 Green Sun's Zenith
-4 Steelshaper's Gift
-4 Ambriel's Edict

Smurfonade:

-Juice from 6 Freshly Squeezed Smurfs to splurge on other smurfs' juices for any juice that tastes good.
-Tobacco from 20 mg to taste better but it may make you cough and fart slightly.
-Empty soda bottle.
-Box of crayons.
-50 Mints
-Bottles of Tabasco sauce.
-Scissors
-Patience!

Alfonso's Note:

-If you don't have 10 free hours in your life, you can still make one! Or make a peanut butter mint and vape it for a day!

holy poo poo lmao did they make transformer funnier

# ¿ Feb 21, 2020 03:42

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# ¿ May 15, 2024 02:38

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

This is a list of all known alternative Smurfs:

-Vexatious Smurf
-Candy Smurf
-Rebellious Smurf
-Brave Smurf
-Silly Smurf
-Crazy Smurf
-Sneaky Smurf
-Pregnant Smurf
-Willy Smurf
-Baldy Smurf
-Grumpy Smurf
-Selfish Smurf
-Big Smurf
-Nerd Smurf
-Gym Smurf
-Lumberjack Smurf
-Boring Smurf

------

Time for more Gargamel's Tasty Treats!

Smurf Wellington:
-phyllo pastry
-several smurfs formed into a smurf roast (refer to chapter VI)
-dulce de leche cream and candy toppings (see above)

Smurf Bonnie:

-homemade whipped cream and raspberry candied pecans (see above)
-peaches and cream topping (see above)

Smurf Crazy Eyes:

-herbal candied candy and whipped cream (see above)
-pineapple candied candy (see above)

Gargamel, in all his snappy wisdom, has shared that!

------
Excerpt from Smurfed Around the World (1898)

the smurfs got into a literal pissing contest:
Oh nooooooo you've gotta destroy the smurf fair! I want my smurfy feelings back! It's so unfair that you can take away my smurf feelings! Guess what?! You've got a giant dog in your house! Now smurf us not! This dog wants to cook you, smurf him if you like, but if you're an ugly (or whatever the smurf means) smurf we'll bash him to bits! Let's get him smurfed!
HEY, BEAR-FUCKER YOU CAN'T HURT ME

# ¿ Feb 24, 2020 00:02

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > BYOB Goldmine: Gold Mango > We must repopulate the smurf village!! :(