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DJ Fuckboy Supreme
Feb 10, 2011

And when you stare long into the abyss, you become aggressively, terminally chill

Carl's jr.: soap dispenser broken, toilet flushed but didn't fill the bowl 6/10

In-n-out: had to ask to unlock bathroom, light was out when I opened it 4/10

McDonald's: wrong kind of hand-drying machine, too loud and hurt my ears 2/10

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RATS!
Dec 23, 2008

five guys near me has a good shitter

The Kins
Oct 2, 2004
subway: doesn't have one, buyer beware

The Dregs
Dec 29, 2005

MY TREEEEEEEE!
the whole point of fast food is you don't have to go inside

RATS!
Dec 23, 2008

The Dregs posted:

the whole point of fast food is you don't have to go inside

i want to review the bathrooms

DJ Fuckboy Supreme
Feb 10, 2011

And when you stare long into the abyss, you become aggressively, terminally chill

Tim Hortons (Canada, UGH): only working toilet spray painted with "double-double" and donuts 1/10

tetsuo
May 12, 2001

I am a shaman, magician
Steak N Shake - every SNS I've been to was equipped with high powered toilets that empty quickly and efficiently.

Brolander
Oct 20, 2008

i am but a vessel
McDonalds: epic tier bathroom to OD on fent in. thin walls, often one shared with the kitchen mean someone may hear your collapse/death rattling, generally round edges so when you fall the chance of laceration is greatly reduced. all mcdonalds employees have a small barrel of narcan around their necks like those dogs from cartoons

City of Glompton
Apr 21, 2014

DJ Fuckboy Supreme posted:

Carl's jr.: soap dispenser broken, toilet flushed but didn't fill the bowl 6/10

In-n-out: had to ask to unlock bathroom, light was out when I opened it 4/10

McDonald's: wrong kind of hand-drying machine, too loud and hurt my ears 2/10

hi mom i didn't know you also posted on the forums

taco bell: dirty, paper towels on floor, cleaning schedule obscured by uh something. still gives away fistfuls of sauce packets 5/10

DJ Fuckboy Supreme
Feb 10, 2011

And when you stare long into the abyss, you become aggressively, terminally chill

City of Glompton posted:

hi mom i didn't know you also posted on the forums

Don't forget to clean your toilet!

DJ Fuckboy Supreme
Feb 10, 2011

And when you stare long into the abyss, you become aggressively, terminally chill

Pizza hut: had to fight the counter worker for the key to the bathroom which he claimed was "for employees only" extremely clean seat still warm 9/10

The_Rob
Feb 1, 2007

Blah blah blah blah!!
Manager at subway let’s me pop pills in the bathroom while listening to podcasts. 7/10

Gone Fashing
Aug 4, 2004

KEEP POSTIN
I'M STILL LAFFIN
i like to refer to the handicapped stalls as the master bedroom

Rad-daddio
Apr 25, 2017
Semi related; how do gang members carve their tags into the bathroom mirror? Like do they buy diamond rings specifically for defacing mirrors, or can you just dig in really hard with a knife and get decent results?

ninjoatse.cx
Apr 9, 2005

Fun Shoe
Every McDonalds is a lousy place to poo poo.

The busiest Taco Bell in Ann Arbor has the cleanest bathroom.

HugeGrossBurrito
Mar 20, 2018
Chic Fila has some pretty choice bathrooms

Nyaa
Jan 7, 2010
Like, Nyaa.

:colbert:
A scientific journal I read said the hand dryer spread germs everywhere, so that’s one thing to consider for your bathroom experiance. I guess it’s fine if it’s a big bathroom like you see in a hotel.

Wormskull
Aug 23, 2009

Grunting guy in a stall at Applebee’s who hears me flush the urinal: Hey man. Hope it all ran smooth haha. Check out Mr Empanada over by Tijuana Flats up the road.

Wormskull
Aug 23, 2009

Nyaa posted:

A scientific journal I read said the hand dryer spread germs everywhere, so that’s one thing to consider for your bathroom experiance. I guess it’s fine if it’s a big bathroom like you see in a hotel.

Getting fast acting McDonalds/Arby’s poop particles on your hands probably enriches the flavor profile when you go back to your meal bro.

Jose Oquendo
Jun 20, 2004

Star Trek: The Motion Picture is a boring movie
A lot of it comes down to management. The guy who owns a lot of the McDonald's around here is an absolutely stickler for a lot of things including clean bathrooms. They're always clean and everything is in working order.

He's also a stickler for hot, fresh fries that completely fill the container. A good man in my book.

Chevy Slyme
May 2, 2004

We're Gonna Run.

We're Gonna Crawl.

Kick Down Every Wall.
I once walked into a chipotle bathroom to find an employee upper decking the toilet.


Like, drat dude, at least lock the door before you take that revenge on your boss.

Wormskull
Aug 23, 2009

CaptainPsyko posted:

I once walked into a chipotle bathroom to find an employee upper decking the toilet.


Like, drat dude, at least lock the door before you take that revenge on your boss.

Badass.

sports
Sep 1, 2012
McDonald’s - hit and miss. Usually really good, sometimes you run into a spongebath weirdo or whatever but they are Old Reliable on road trips.

Jimmy Johns- delivery place so their bathrooms are usually pretty low traffic and kept nice. Unless you go to a location open late and it’s in a college town. Then it’s usually full of vomit.

Starbucks- color scheme does a good job of masking god awful stains and detritus, usually it’s just realtors and high school kids (highly intimidating) chain smoking there so you will have to tread lightly. Definitely a cuter, warmer place to poo poo.

White Castle, Steak and Shake, Five Guys: these places have those white tiles and are essentially hosed off once a day. I suggest avoiding these places unless you want to lose weight and eat off white plates at home. These places are billed as kid friendly (at least steak and shake is) or frequented by really old people so there’s very high likelihood of someone missing their target on a #2.

1982 Subaru Brat
Feb 2, 2007

by Athanatos
A Jack in the Box shitter was full of toilet paper above the water line, after pissing on it I flushed as a joke and amazingly it all went down, no clog or backwash at all

They know who their customers are that's for drat sure

sports
Sep 1, 2012

1982 Subaru Brat posted:

A Jack in the Box shitter was full of toilet paper above the water line, after pissing on it I flushed as a joke and amazingly it all went down, no clog or backwash at all

They know who their customers are that's for drat sure

You took a full bowl manhole cover poo poo and you flushed it. JITB has urinals.

CaptainSarcastic
Jul 6, 2013



A Dairy Queen near me had all the tiles around the urinal chipped out for some reason and the gap was filled in with kitty litter. It was awesomely hacky and gross, would recommend for absurdist comedy value. I took pictures, if I can find them I'll update the thread.

DJ Fuckboy Supreme
Feb 10, 2011

And when you stare long into the abyss, you become aggressively, terminally chill

CaptainSarcastic posted:

A Dairy Queen near me had all the tiles around the urinal chipped out for some reason and the gap was filled in with kitty litter. It was awesomely hacky and gross, would recommend for absurdist comedy value. I took pictures, if I can find them I'll update the thread.

Please do tia

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MakaVillian
Aug 16, 2003

Well, in Whoville they say - that his tiny hands grew three sizes that day.

Jose Oquendo posted:


He's also a stickler for hot, fresh fries that completely fill the container. A good man in my book.

I dare anyone to tell me fresh McDonalds fries aren't the best in the world.

Unfortunately I can't say the same about most of the McD's bathrooms I've been in.

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