Buddhism Thread: Bitch I just told you about kshitigarbha

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Ask/Tell > Buddhism Thread: Bitch I just told you about kshitigarbha

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

Hello Buddhism thread, I have a couple of meditation questions:

1. For various reasons (primarily health anxiety issues) i don't really care for breath meditation. Does anyone have a go-to alternative practice? I've been doing one where I just cycle through all my body parts that are touching but wondering if there are other good ones.

2. Thoughts on listening to drone music or binaural beats or nature soundscapes while meditating? I find they sometimes increase my focus by blocking out more distracting sounds (like if my wife is on the phone in the other room)

I've been dipping in and out of Buddhism for about ten years, but I only started a regular meditation practice in 2021 so I'm still really new to it. I'm also pretty uninformed in general but I did pick up the book that you've all been reading so I'm going to try to increase my knowledge and put it to practical use.

# ¿ Feb 21, 2022 21:23

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# ¿ May 21, 2024 19:06

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

Thanks all, mantras sound like a great idea. My therapist has recommended walking meditation as well and I've tried it a bit when I'm out walking but when I'm out walking it's with my dog and she takes a lot of my focus! I understand you can just do it pacing around the room so I'll give that a try too.

# ¿ Feb 22, 2022 01:57

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

Okay follow up question: where does one go about picking a mantra?

# ¿ Feb 22, 2022 02:04

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

Wow mantra meditation felt way more natural for me than breath meditation. My mind still wandered a bit but I think having something verbal as my focus kept my inner monologue from really being able to take off.

# ¿ Feb 22, 2022 06:04

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

I am finding the book club book a bit difficult to get through. Does anyone have any recommendations for something that's a bit deeper than the secular buddhism for Westerners genre but still written to be approachable? I just read 10% Happier and I enjoyed it but it definitely handwaved a lot of the metaphysical aspects of Buddhism. The metaphysical aspects are part of what I'm hoping can help me reduce my attachment to my current conception of self (and hopefully therefore stop having my day completely railroaded by health anxiety every time I feel a little unexpected sensation or whatever.)

Also I remember when I first asked my parents what happened when you die when I was a little kid and they talked to me about different religious beliefs, when they got to reincarnation I was like "oh yeah that one sounds right" and sometimes you have to go with your gut.

# ¿ Feb 27, 2022 20:57

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

Caufman posted:

I'm interested to know what you mean by the metaphysical aspects of Buddhism that you'd like to learn more about, can you describe that? Is that like the Buddhist views on impermanence and non-dualism that you'd like to learn more deeply?

Yeah a lot of the Buddhism for Westerners genre deliberately ignores things like karma or rebirth. The books are very accessible, but they're often pretty secular. So yeah the stuff about samsara, non-dualism, etc. But written for dumb guys like me.

# ¿ Mar 2, 2022 05:59

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

I'm not sure how finding a bunch of old Dorito dust is supposed to enlighten me

# ¿ Mar 8, 2022 06:52

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

Do you guys ever have days where you're just so resistant to meditating? The past week or so I've been having trouble focusing at work, my mind is just darting around like crazy from distraction to distraction and it's like a wrestling match with myself every day to get myself to sit down and meditate for ten minutes.

# ¿ Mar 15, 2022 05:24

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

Beowulfs_Ghost posted:

If it makes you feel any better, tradition says that this sort of restless mind is only completely shaken off when one reaches the state of an arhat.

If your practice is more focused based, like breath counting or mantas, if feel for you. That is tough. These sorts of busy moments in life can come and go, so you may just have to tough out this cycle.

Another option is vipassana style meditation. As soon as you notice your mind is running down some trail, just label it. Just say to yourself "thinking". Or sometimes it is more helpful to differentiate between memories with "past", or plans with "future". And then just watch that line of inner dialogue end. It will inevitably start up again, you will get caught up in it, then remember you should be meditating, so you note to yourself that you are "thinking" again.

In this way you can kind of turn the constant distractions of life into a meditation object. And it can lead to insights. Getting faster at noting the thoughts as they arise can often lead to seeing what exactly is prompting the thought in the first place.

I pretty much always do breath, mantra, or like body scan type meditations. I think that's definitely the cause of resistance because I can feel myself just screaming "noooo don't make me focus on one boring thing!" I was so all over the place yesterday I couldn't even play Elden Ring for more than about 30 minutes. Not even anxious or worried, just zipping around from this to that. Maybe I'm destroying my mind with TikTok.

In vipassana after you notice and label a thought what comes next? The only practices I know always have you returning to some sort of object of focus.

# ¿ Mar 15, 2022 14:38

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

Bilirubin posted:

One thing I did the other day (unrelated, unless...) was instead of just watching breathing, body scanning, or doing a short guided meditation, was allow myself to focus on what is causing my suffering. It was nice to, as some dharma talks I have watched said to, reach out and embrace my suffering, and keep it in a more objective place! I know the major sources for issues, and other manifestations that I have not so clearly tied to the central issues, but that was calming. I now feel much more capable to address these sources of issues. But lol I'm not sure how to proceed after this. Its like I read the text book so far, and have been left with my suffering at a cliffhanger.

My therapist actually recommended this for my health anxiety and it's super useful. Instead of running away from whatever symptom is driving me into a panic, I do a 2-3 minute meditation with the sensation as my object of focus. I also sometimes do this when I get headaches. Headaches aren't a source of anxiety for me but they are unpleasant. Turning towards them usually makes them much more tolerable.

# ¿ Mar 15, 2022 18:26

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

Beowulfs_Ghost posted:

Thoughts are an interesting one.

With other body sensations, it is very easy to realize that they are happening, and that there isn't much you can do about it. So you can reach a kind of equanimity that there is a sensation of the floor against your leg, or air going in and out the nose.

Thoughts we take personally. They are my thoughts. They _are_ me! But just as your stomach secretes digestive juices in response to swallowing food, the brain secretes thoughts in response to some other stimulus. The more you think about your thoughts, the more thoughts you think. And we are taught to take our thoughts very seriously.

Often times, the mental exercise of sticking a one word post-it note on a passing thought is enough to deprive the thought of any additional karma, and it will just fizzle out if you don't give it additional material to work with. The better you get at it, the more it becomes like watching an itch come and go in your leg. It becomes, "Here comes a thought about plans for tomorrow... There goes a thought about plans for tomorrow".

As for what comes next? Another thought. There is always another thought that pops up in the mind. A lot of body scanning techniques are to build an ability to dispassionately observe, and then to turn that ability onto the mind itself.

There is also meditation that "focuses on not being focused". Like shikantaza from the Zen traditions. They often start with breath watching to build concentration. But instead of using that concentration to grip harder onto an object of meditation, you concentrate on keeping your "hands" open to just let experience and sensation flow right past.

It may also just be that you are over stimulating yourself with TikTok. In which case, use the insight you've gained to recognize that, and the concentration you've gained to put the phone down.

If you want a more technical explanation into why you may have some kind of aversion to some aspect of meditation, look up dukkha nana or "knowledge of suffering". It is very natural to cycle though these sort of things. As you start a style of meditation, it holds your attention because it is kind of hard. Then it becomes easier and you get a sort of bliss of accomplishment. But the bliss is fleeting, and then you feel resentment and aversion. If you keep at it, you realize that this is the natural flow of life, and your reach equanimity.

So you move through;
"Let's do this."
"I've got this!"
"Not this again..."
"This just is."

And with that, you slowly but surely chisel away at the grip that suffering has on your mind.

This is great stuff, thank you!

# ¿ Mar 15, 2022 20:31

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

for fucks sake posted:

Yongey Mingyur Rinpoche talks about this often, that you can use pretty much anything to focus your awareness and that it's the awareness itself that's important.

I really like what I've seen of his stuff, mainly because he suffered from panic attacks as a kid and uses that to inform his teaching quite a bit. I also think the stuff he's done with neuroscience is really interesting.

# ¿ Mar 15, 2022 21:53

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

Bilirubin posted:

me three, his longish (1.5 hour) introduction to meditation was formative for me. And he's a hoot

Is that on YouTube? I read his book last year and learned a lot

# ¿ Mar 16, 2022 05:26

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

I tried that using your thoughts as the object of focus meditation and whoa, I have a lot of thoughts! It's crazy how just labelling them or cataloguing them makes it really easy to just let them pass by.

# ¿ Mar 18, 2022 05:27

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

I have yet to attempt a session longer than ten minutes. I am pretty much always itching to be done by the time the timer goes off. Very occasionally the time will be up before I expected it to be but that doesn't happen often.

# ¿ Mar 21, 2022 05:08

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

Yeah just post, I think many of us probably have the same struggles and benefit from seeing the suggestions.

# ¿ Mar 21, 2022 19:00

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

catgirlgenius posted:

hi thread! i have been real into mindfulness for a couple months now as a way to reroute my brain away from my ADHD's worst triggers, but seeing how yesterday i gave into my anger and told a transphobe to poo poo blood and then drink it, clearly, i can always go chiller. not like Texas is gonna get any more calm...

i'm reading though Thich Nhat Hahn's How to Eat, and it's lovely. i have a used copy of The Heart of the Buddha's Teaching coming in the mail, so i'll probably have more questions then! for now, i'll read over the entirety of this thread
thanks for fostering this space y'all!

I have a hard time remembering to be compassionate when getting into online discussions, and in the case of bigots it's really hard to not resort to anger and name-calling. I try to take online arguments as an opportunity to show compassion to someone I disagree with and in the case of really hateful people I just have to block them

# ¿ Mar 21, 2022 19:55

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

for fucks sake posted:

It sounds a bit glib but it's helped me when I've been dissatisfied with my efforts at practicing: the only bad meditation is the one you didn't do.

Any time spent sitting with the right intention is time well spent I feel.

At the very least it's time not spent looking at my phone

# ¿ Mar 23, 2022 23:53

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

Just finishing The Dawn of Everything on audiobook and then going to start the Heart book next. Hopefully it's not too hard to follow as an audiobook.

Something I've noticed recently is I really don't get angry as quickly as I used to. Anger's never been a huge problem for me nor something I've wanted to specifically address but like anyone I would get pissy in traffic or in other cases where things didn't go my way. It seems like I just have a little more space now, a little more ability to just look at the situation and accept it. Also I was getting mad the other (at elden ring lol) and I was able to notice it happening and take a step back from it instead of just living in it. That's pretty cool.

# ¿ Mar 24, 2022 04:18

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

I'm still aiming for ten minute sits but I did a fifteen minute one the other day and it wasn't agonizing. Ten still feels like the number where it's so short that it's really hard to justify to myself not doing it.

I'm finding breaking the meditation up into a first portion where I focus on breathing (less of a problem for me lately) or mantra and then a second portion where I do open awareness helps. The open awareness has been interesting, I keep trying to come back to a home base and not having one and it makes watching my mind pretty entertaining.

# ¿ Apr 4, 2022 05:36

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

Brawnfire posted:

I hear ya. One of my biggest struggles with death is oblivion. Just, an inability to reckon with a lack of POV. Obviously.

So my mind refuses a world where I'm not behind a set of eyes, or at least within a living--if not sensing--being. The Being is the only existence I understand.

For some reason my mind insists that its inability to grasp oblivion means it can't be true, that I must wake up in a second or a thousand years when something lines up just right, with complete cessation of awareness of these current years. It may have happened before. But it's foolish, also, because there's no limit on "self"s and so no need to recycle them. So, idk

Oblivion is definitely a source of anxiety for me as well but most of us experience snippets of it. You've never had a dreamless sleep? My conception of it is just that, only without the waking up part. Scary, but also kinda not?

# ¿ Apr 4, 2022 22:13

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

I have been doing the thought cataloguing or noting practice where I observe my thoughts, note them ("planning, worry, reminiscing, work" etc.) and one of the ones that comes up a lot is "posting" :v:

Also, total aside but just an interesting thing I've observed about my mind. I first started practicing regularly last May or so and I was playing a lot of Apex Legends at the time. I don't play at all anymore and I haven't in probably 6-8 months but during most meditations I get an image of it somewhere near the beginning of the practice. It's neat how strong our neural habits are, and I can see pretty obvious parallels between a relatively benign pattern like that and some of my more harmful ones.

# ¿ Apr 8, 2022 05:15

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

Nessus posted:

What are your pro tips for getting a bit of sitting time in or do you just block out a chunk of time and make it a red line in your daily routine?

I have a daily to-do list with all my habits I need to do on it (meditate, read for ten minutes, practice music for ten minutes, etc). No video games until everything on the list is done. Replace video games with whatever your end of day unwind activity is.

# ¿ Apr 10, 2022 04:43

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

Ramrod Hotshot posted:

I've tried "meditating" as I understand it, meaning "clearing my mind" and focusing on breathing and it's basically impossible. I'm too easily distracted which is of course the problem to begin with.

That's why it's called practice. It's really, really hard. I've been meditating for about a year and on my best days I get maybe 30 seconds in a row of staying focused on the object of meditation (breath, mantra, a sound, physical sensation, whatever.) What I am getting better at is noticing that my mind has wandered and then placing it back on the object. A good session for me isn't having no distracting thoughts, it's being aware of my distracting thoughts almost as quickly as they come and letting them go by rather than fixating on one and following it.

If you're doing breath meditation two things have helped me: first, try to narrow your focus on where ever you feel the breath the most. For me that's my abdomen rising and falling. Second, I think this might be a training wheels thing but I like to count breaths. I count 1 on the in breath and 1 on the out breath, then 2, then 3 all the way up to 10, then back down to 1.

I am really new to this so someone more experienced might come along with better advice or even advice that contradicts mine. I'm definitely no master, this is just my noob experience.

# ¿ May 2, 2022 04:13

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

Meditation has helped my anxiety somewhat as well because I'm better now at watching my own thoughts and potentially discarding the ones I don't need. I notice anxious thinking earlier on when it's easier to refute or discard rather than not noticing what's going on until I'm halfway to a panic attack.

# ¿ May 2, 2022 21:03

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

I'm not sure if this is wrong but I mix up my meditation focus a lot. I'll do breath, mantra, listening to sounds, open awareness, body scan, honing in on a specific sensation (great when you have pain you can zero in on)

Usually I stick with 1-2 of these per session

# ¿ May 4, 2022 04:32

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

I sometimes use itches as my object of focus. It's neat to inspect an itch instead of reacting to it. They usually end up going away.

# ¿ May 6, 2022 05:31

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

Good posts in here over the past couple days, thanks everyone for sharing

# ¿ May 26, 2022 05:31

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

I try not to mess with bugs in the house too much, but when we go up north the black flies and mosquitos are a menace. I know it's their territory and they're just trying to eat but I don't have the compassion to let them feast on me.

# ¿ Jun 2, 2022 13:40

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

Lay person? More like gettin laid person

# ¿ Jun 6, 2022 05:12

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

How would you tell if a technique was too easy? I don't think I've run into that issue yet haha

# ¿ Jun 18, 2022 18:00

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

For me when I count breaths I almost never lose count or over count but I still have lots of thoughts at the same time as I'm counting. Usually I try to combine counting with watching and I definitely still find that challenging. Some days more than others.

# ¿ Jun 19, 2022 03:45

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

Something I'm struggling with lately is being against killing and violence but also a lingering belief that violence might be the only way to achieve certain political aims, if not now then in the future. I find it hard to square that.

# ¿ Jun 25, 2022 21:47

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

Nessus posted:

Also I believe you can always make statues of the Buddha, because let me tell you: if you're not supposed to, a lot of people are in some deep dukkha

Especially that guy in Sekiro

# ¿ Jul 27, 2022 20:34

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

Has anyone listened to any Insight Hour with Joseph Goldstein? My therapist recommended it, listened to a couple episodes and it seems pretty nice but I don't know a lot

# ¿ Sep 26, 2022 01:27

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

My meditation has kinda sucked lately, my mind is just going every which way and I'm really resisting even sitting down. Any suggestions?

# ¿ Oct 28, 2022 05:22

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

https://twitter.com/meaning_enjoyer/status/1625818174863343617?s=46&t=wqjaOIpoTG8GesDkBLpo_w

Is being mean to chat bots unskillful? I find I don't really have the desire to talk poo poo to chatbots or mow down pedestrians in GTA these days.

# ¿ Feb 16, 2023 04:50

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

I love the current thread title but

Virgil Vox posted:

can you meet your miata in the Brahma realm?

# ¿ Feb 20, 2023 16:02

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

I have that exact same issue with breath meditation. I sometimes like to focus on sensations in my hands or things I can hear.

# ¿ Mar 24, 2023 05:26

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# ¿ May 21, 2024 19:06

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

Heath posted:

it's fine to play video games, but if playing them is causing other problems (ignoring other duties, or consuming a large degree of your thoughts when you're not playing them, causing you rage and anxiety) then it is worth taking a step back to cultivate the state of mind that allows you to look at their role and presence in a detached way as such that you can see that problem. In other words, if you have been playing Elden Ring for 7 hours straight, mindfulness is looking at that and realizing that it is a problem without getting judgmental of yourself for having done it but instead taking time to refocus.

Buddhism has been great for me in this regard. I used to get really mad at games. Now I know that my intention when I play games is to have fun, and I'm aware much earlier on if I'm getting frustrated and I have the wherewithal to just put the game down and go do something more productive. I think when Elden Ring came out I did put some marathon sessions in but at the same time I knew that's what I wanted to do and I made space for them which imo is different than accidentally spending your whole day in front of the TV when you had other stuff you wanted to accomplish.

In terms of internet Buddhists my experience has been that every internet community will eventually distill down to people who are really hardcore and people who are more casual don't post as much. For example if you ask on a mountain biking community how to get started they'll say you probably need a $1200 bike and don't even bother with a department store bike because they're poo poo and really the $1200 one is just to get you started until you save up enough for a $4000 full suspension bike. Meanwhile there are loads of kids out on trails on department store bikes having a great time and not even having an inkling that some nerd online thinks their bike sucks.

Basically this proZD video: https://youtu.be/4ZK8Z8hulFg

# ¿ Apr 16, 2023 18:33

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