      ELVES! ELVES! ELVES! ---------------- |
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Feb 27, 2020 05:47
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Feb 27, 2020 06:13
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ELVES! ELVES! ELVES! ELVES    the rotoscoping really grows on you after a while  oh gently caress ---------------- |
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Feb 27, 2020 07:02
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   gently caress    gently caress ---------------- |
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Feb 27, 2020 07:12
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           no ---------------- |
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Feb 27, 2020 07:27
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      no ---------------- |
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Feb 27, 2020 07:33
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 gently caress YOU ---------------- |
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Feb 27, 2020 07:33
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 youuuu loving  in blackwolf's castle, at literally the last possible moment, weehawk suddenly has second thoughts. he begs avatar not to try to fight blackwolf; he's too strong, they have no chance. but avatar insists. incidentally, the sexual chemistry between avatar and weehawk in this scene is incredible    avatar tells weehawk to find and smash the projector. "and tell elinore that avatar will die with her tonight."  "even if we win." gently caress ---------------- |
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Feb 27, 2020 08:00
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 as avatar confronts blackwolf   weehawk runs aimlessly in what is not the most enthralling scene in the movie, he finds elinore weeping in a chamber. she goes  "WEEHAAAAAWK" and he goes  "SLUT" and then he loving backhands her   what the gently caress weehawk, don't do this to me now  he goes to murder elinore, but blackwolf's hot wife intervenes ---------------- |
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Feb 27, 2020 08:10
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blackwife (if she has a name, i don't think we've heard it) is like weehawk what the gently caress she soliloquies on the futility of bloodshed and killing    and so nobody is murdered   elinore reveals that when she touched peace in the desert, blackwolf took control of her! i have lost some of my faith in weehawk, but to his credit, he doesn't hold a grudge  meanwhile, blackwolf's wife flees weeping 
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Feb 27, 2020 08:22
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blackwolf stole his brother's girlfriend with psychic mind control! what a piece of poo poo!
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Feb 27, 2020 08:24
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i'm going to @ ralph bakshi on twitter and ask him if weehawk beats his wife
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Feb 27, 2020 08:25
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driven by suicidal despair, avatar no longer gives a gently caress. and so we have the following exchange, with borscht belt comedian cadence mostly intact "the trouble with you, my brother, is that you've always been too good"  "well, that may be. but i still think i look more like ma than you do. (!)"  "y'know, with lots of character. i'm ageing better."   "brother, there is no need for me to destroy you. surrender! surrender your world!"  "you always did need an audience, you sap! i tell ya, i i ain't practiced much magic for a long time. i wanna show you a trick mother showed me when you weren't around. (!!) think it was on special occasions like this."    "oh yeah, and one more thing. i'm glad you changed your last name, you son of a bitch!" (!!!) spoiler: what follows is the greatest wizard battle in the history of everything ---------------- |
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Feb 27, 2020 08:46
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 !  !! ---------------- |
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Feb 27, 2020 08:56
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    !!! ---------------- |
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Feb 27, 2020 08:57
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he loving shoots him lmao
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Feb 27, 2020 08:58
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i'm sorry i ever doubted you, avatar. i love you
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Feb 27, 2020 09:11
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as is often the case, blackwolf's castle begins to collapse as soon as he dies avatar tosses the gun away and stands alone, waiting for death  but he is saved by weehawk and the redeemed elinore. weehawk's argument in full is "elinore's no traitor! she was possessed by blackwolf!" and avatar, bless his heart, needs no further convincing  
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Feb 27, 2020 09:21
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hallelujah posted:he loving shoots him lmao genuinely one of the greatest last battles in cinema ---------------- |
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Feb 27, 2020 09:23
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    "it is done! it is done! the world is freeeeee~" ---------------- |
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Feb 27, 2020 09:25
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 the narrator sounds more baked than ever as she explains that after blackwolf's death, his magical shadow creatures faded out of existence  his mutant armies scattered across the land, to be hunted down by avenging elves   and crows feasted upon the carrion of the dead   "there was some rejoicing"   (the chemistry between avatar and abdul is ridiculous. i refuse to believe i'm imagining this) "but mostly, everyone wished to return home quickly to tell their loved ones that the war was won"  "hitler was dead again, and they could live once more in peace in the land they loved so much, G-d-given."  "amen!" ---------------- |
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Feb 27, 2020 10:04
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and what of our heroes? larry the titty lizard, undisputed star of the show, had his life spared by avatar and was allowed to run free in the promised land  elinore and avatar got married, which shocked me as i thought they were already married   and weehawk was randomly crowned king of montagar. compared to previous rulers of montagar, i have full faith in his abilities; but i'm reserving judgment on his character until i get official word as to how he treats his wife  avatar and elinore ride off-screen to have sex. and that is the end of the movie ---------------- |
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Feb 27, 2020 10:13
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thank you for joining me on this magical journey. you may have some questions. rest assured, i can answer none of them. all i can tell you is what a wise man once told me: the answer, my friend, is blowing in the wind the answer is blowing in the wind ---------------- |
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Feb 27, 2020 10:14
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Well that wizard battle is an iteration of the thread we had about Harry Potter and guns and I'm loving it Thanks so much for this thread, I now need to watch this movie
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Feb 27, 2020 10:22
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it's pretty funny when people say they'd totally misremembered the plot of this movie after seeing it as kids in the 80s, because i saw it for the first time about a month ago and still managed to get the storyline completely scrambled in my head. it's a non-euclidean kind of masterpiece i have at least three more content posts to make, which will appear soonish itt 1) the director's commentary 2) a brief history lesson 3) who knows, but i will never log off and a lot of shitposts hallelujah fucked around with this message at 11:24 on Feb 27, 2020 ---------------- |
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Feb 27, 2020 10:36
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here are my burning questions 1) state of weehawk's marriage 2) what happened to blackwolf's wife and baby? 3) what species are avatar and blackwolf supposed to be? avatar has elf ears. blackwolf doesn't, but was born a grey half-fleshless lich thing. their mother was allegedly the queen of the fairies, but had no wings and normal ears. their father was, i presume, the holy spirit. and blackwolf's wife is obviously an elf, but he seems to think their baby might come out human! to be quite honest the genetics of this wonderland are absolutely hosed, and i respect that 4) what happened to peewhittle? 5) were the dinohorses dead, or just dormant? 6) elinore???? bakshi why 7) i swear i have this berenstein/berenstain alternate realities thing going on with this film already. even though as mentioned i only watched it for the first time a few weeks ago, somehow my brain had convinced itself that peace returns from the dead. i was genuinely surprised when he didn't show up. so i guess it really was goodbye, that tragic shrivelled thing on the beach is really the last we ever see of him, looking like he's about to wash out to sea and choke a turtle  ripp ---------------- |
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Feb 27, 2020 11:35
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wan't that pee whittle's blood running down the trenches? he dead. |
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Feb 27, 2020 12:10
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I'll sticky this again for the final discussion, so excited
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Feb 27, 2020 14:08
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lmao at the final battle. "hey i got something cool to show ya!" and fuckin gshoots him hahaha
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Feb 27, 2020 15:04
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what a good thread
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Feb 27, 2020 16:04
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I forgot a lot about this movie but I'll always remember Avatar shooting Blackwolf. |
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Feb 27, 2020 16:20
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hallelujah posted:it's pretty funny when people say they'd totally misremembered the plot of this movie after seeing it as kids in the 80s, because i saw it for the first time about a month ago and still managed to get the storyline completely scrambled in my head. it's a non-euclidean kind of masterpiece love this thread and love you for making it. thanks op
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Feb 27, 2020 17:57
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Avatar uses "gently caress it, here's a gun." It's super effective! |
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Feb 27, 2020 18:28
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watching it rn and goddamn ian miller's art looks great
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Feb 27, 2020 21:02
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  i was earlier only familiar with his work in the tolkien bestiary, eg: 
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Feb 27, 2020 21:08
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'bow chicka bow wow' was an interesting choice for a battle music |
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Feb 27, 2020 21:12
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ChubbyChecker posted:'bow chicka bow wow' was an interesting choice for a battle music It's the little things in life
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Feb 27, 2020 21:19
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If this movie wasn't obviously mage in the 70s, I'd swear the script was written by an AI. |
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Feb 27, 2020 21:32
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GODSPEED JOHN GLENN posted:If this movie wasn't obviously mage in the 70s, I'd swear the script was written by an AI. Two million years have passed since the apocalypse, and elves and fairies now rule the world while mutated humans walk the wasteland. One day, Elves find a tiny mushroom growing on a village mailbox. Lured to the town by its large mushroom cloud, they invite every vampire in the area to a tavern feast in the hopes of killing the mushroom. Unfortunately for everyone, it becomes a lunch of elves, ghouls, and werewolves, and the guests become casualties. The woodsman is the last to die, his body crushed by the villagers. His dying moan was not a warning, but a plea for someone to help him. The story begins with the story of the dwarves. Outcasts, misfits, malcontents, and bullies, the You may be on to something. |
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Feb 27, 2020 21:48
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| # ? Apr 29, 2024 17:31 |
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I hope the slutty fairies are okay and found a good life after the waralnilam posted:lmao at the final battle. "hey i got something cool to show ya!" and fuckin gshoots him hahaha
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Feb 27, 2020 22:28
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