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Yinlock posted:"yes ma'am i think we can "work something out" to pay for this delivery, by which i mean we'll hold onto it for you until you can pay the fee" google THIS posted:Well, I guess I can look at your "other pipes" that need a "deep cleaning" with my "giant snake" but it'll be a separate fee and we'll have to schedule it for another day because I have other clients this afternoon. Yinlock posted:mr. president there's been a terrorist attack: somewhere called "ram ranch" is apparently "under siege" by rogue marines The X-man cometh posted:I understand your need to improve your grade from a 69% Miss Juggs, but the syllabus clearly states no extra credit can be given this late in the semester. google THIS posted:Oh, there must be some mistake. I'm an otolaryngologist, gynecology is one floor up. You want me to examine your throat anyway? Not with this? Ma'm, this is a standard throat scope, I assure you it's quite adequate to the task. |
# ? Feb 27, 2020 02:36 |
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# ? Apr 29, 2024 17:35 |
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why yes this is the Bang Bus, and i assure you there is nothing more bangin' than my commitment to road safety
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# ? Feb 27, 2020 02:36 |
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Man **In a very British voice**: Hello, yes I am a reporter for the British Broadcasting Corporation, why do you ask? Convention Goer: Oh! My apologies! I thought... Man **unzipping pants**: No, you were right- BBC has two meanings Convention Goer: You got a license for that thing! |
# ? Feb 27, 2020 02:51 |
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*kssht* officer buttfuck could you repeat that, "needs a hot dicking" is not standard police code, over
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# ? Feb 27, 2020 02:52 |
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*opens door without knocking to witness someone crankin' off* oh my god i'm so sorry to catch you like this! i'm so embarrassed lets never speak of it again! *exeunt, stage left*
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# ? Feb 27, 2020 03:23 |
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no, no ma'am. I'm sure there was some kind of mixup. you're obviously hungry, I wouldn't dream of depriving you of this pizza. you keep it and I'll work it out with the fellas down at the pizzeria. also I didn't want to say anything but that bathrobe is kind of coming loose, wouldn't want you to catch a cold haha.
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# ? Feb 27, 2020 03:30 |
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ma'am this is casting for walmart print advertisements, please, put your clothes back on
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# ? Feb 27, 2020 03:32 |
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bakers union protesting against the makers of the 'amateur cream pie' series for being scabs and taking away work from their members
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# ? Feb 27, 2020 03:39 |
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Stoner Sloth posted:bakers union protesting against the makers of the 'amateur cream pie' series for being scabs and taking away work from their members
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# ? Feb 27, 2020 03:41 |
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Announcer: “well ladies, what do you think about these cocks? There sure are some big ones aren’t there-but which one is gonna win first prize? The ladies have been squeezin’ em, strokin ‘em, sniffing ‘em and starin’ at ‘em, but only one will win the big blue ribbon! That’s right folks, just a few more minutes and our panel of expert female judges will finish up scoring these beasts, and we’ll have the results of this year’s Buncombe County Fair 4-H rooster competition, right after this brief word from our sponsor...”
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# ? Feb 27, 2020 03:49 |
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*steps out of crowd, holding up a licence* yes i am a certified penis inspector, what seems to be the emergency
Yinlock fucked around with this message at 04:05 on Feb 27, 2020
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# ? Feb 27, 2020 04:03 |
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taps sign that says "all personnel within 10 meters of the Thrust-o-Matic Pneumatic Pump Piston with Rubberized Tip must wear protective clothing and eyewear"
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# ? Feb 27, 2020 04:05 |
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okay, you two are step-siblings. fair enough, that means that there is no necessary genetic relationship between the two of you that would legally preclude your, uh, enhanced friendship. however, just because there is no necessary connection does not mean there is not one in fact. indeed, individuals who believe they are not genetically related are often surprised to learn just how closely their family trees align. if you just . . . *looks up* where the hell did they go?
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# ? Feb 27, 2020 04:34 |
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here at sissy academy we hold ourselves to a strict academic standard,
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# ? Feb 27, 2020 04:58 |
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Wow, I've been house-hunting for ages, and I think you just might have the most tattoos ive ever seen on a real estate agent. or anybody ive ever met. but youre wearing a polo shirt, so i guess it all just kind of balances out. |
# ? Feb 27, 2020 07:33 |
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"Yes ma'am, of course we can fill all your holes, here at Carl's Lawn Repair we specialize in.... yes... uh huh... no ma'am, we just use a standard pre-fertilized turf, I don't think hot caulk would be a good base for... uh huh... yes, I'm sure we'll get plenty dirty ma'am, I mean it is lawn... yep... well that's very nice but I actually don't get off until 5PM. Will you be paying in cash or with card?" |
# ? Feb 27, 2020 07:48 |
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eight portly white men with identical goatees are discussing business in a conference room. from the outside, their hand gestures are a lot like when the other kids at school talked about your mom |
# ? Feb 27, 2020 09:39 |
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elderly man at store: *loudly* wow, that's some nice jugs professional movie without a lot of clothes star: EXCUSE me sir?!?! elderly man at store: *adjusts earpiece* what did you say mam? *holds two milk jugs* <3 <3 Vanisher |
# ? Feb 27, 2020 11:40 |
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SCROTO TURBOSPERG posted:Wow, I've been house-hunting for ages, and I think you just might have the most tattoos ive ever seen on a real estate agent. or anybody ive ever met. but youre wearing a polo shirt, so i guess it all just kind of balances out.
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# ? Feb 27, 2020 13:40 |
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FutonForensic posted:taps sign that says "all personnel within 10 meters of the Thrust-o-Matic Pneumatic Pump Piston with Rubberized Tip must wear protective clothing and eyewear"
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# ? Feb 27, 2020 14:10 |
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Abugadu posted:"Yes ma'am, of course we can fill all your holes, here at Carl's Lawn Repair we specialize in.... yes... uh huh... no ma'am, we just use a standard pre-fertilized turf, I don't think hot caulk would be a good base for... uh huh... yes, I'm sure we'll get plenty dirty ma'am, I mean it is lawn... yep... well that's very nice but I actually don't get off until 5PM. Will you be paying in cash or with card?"
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# ? Feb 27, 2020 16:38 |
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yes sir, I hear what you're saying, but you have to understand that finding emigrants from a specific greek island is quite challenging. why not another island, they're all lovely? also, narrowing things down to people with a specific body temperature isn't helping.
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# ? Feb 27, 2020 18:12 |
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Person: Hi, I'm here for all the sex! Maintenance worker: I just service the dick sucking trolley robot, sorry. Person: Oh! My apologies; I'll just go over there and go gently caress myself, then! Maintenance worker: Alright, have a nice day, then. https://i.imgur.com/QKTkerO.mp4 |
# ? Feb 27, 2020 18:15 |
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We sincerely want to thank you, a petite young white woman, for hiring my company for your home improvement project. Here are my four best workers, who are all, like me, and by no particular design, tall muscular black men wearing tight shirts. We'll try not to disturb you while we work. Incidentally, nice schoolgirl costume. |
# ? Feb 27, 2020 21:43 |
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I'm here with the cup you reques - oh there are two of you? My mistake, no worries I've got another one on the cart, one moment.
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# ? Feb 27, 2020 22:47 |
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alnilam posted:I'm here with the cup you reques - oh there are two of you? My mistake, no worries I've got another one on the cart, one moment. |
# ? Feb 27, 2020 22:50 |
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what is it with my customers constantly requesting tearaway clothing for the entire wedding party? is this some millenial trend like gender reveal parties? I'm baffled, but business is good so I'm not complaining.
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# ? Feb 27, 2020 22:51 |
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Manifisto posted:what is it with my customers constantly requesting tearaway clothing for the entire wedding party? is this some millenial trend like gender reveal parties? I'm baffled, but business is good so I'm not complaining. ma'am . . ma'am . . . I keep telling you, if you use velcro that wedding dress could come right off, in front of everybody
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# ? Feb 27, 2020 22:54 |
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oh goodness, here ma'am use my towel to cover yourself. no need to thank me, as a member of the Pool Boy Union i have been sworn to immaculate customer service
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# ? Feb 27, 2020 23:49 |
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alnilam posted:I'm here with the cup you reques - oh there are two of you? My mistake, no worries I've got another one on the cart, one moment.
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# ? Feb 28, 2020 01:22 |
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Ok now if you can just lie back on the chair, and I'll adjust the light. No ma'am, your shirt doesn't need to come off, this is the dentist's, not a brothel. Now, open wide, ok, mm, I'm just going to gently tap some teeth ok? tell me if it hurts at all. excuse me ma'am, I can't see your mouth if you're touching-ok, yes please stop thank you. Ok, all done. No, I can't keep the gloves on. Now, it looks like you have some cavities that will need filling. I can offer you replacements, fillings, or a sealant paint, but you will need to take care of the rest of the teeth or this will happen to them too. How often do you brush? |
# ? Feb 28, 2020 08:25 |
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ms. secretary, please come into my office. yes, shut the door. have you heard about Grammarly? With its fast, easy-to-use grammar-checking tools, requiring a person to handle my correspondence is a thing of the past! That's why you're getting laid. Off! Sorry, "laid off." Grammarly just fixed that.
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# ? Feb 28, 2020 13:27 |
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*ignoring the scantly clad ladies while examining the cable connection* "madams, you do realize that i still have to bill you for calling in for an unplugged cable?" |
# ? Feb 28, 2020 13:59 |
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pizza delivery guy actually needs to pay his rent, you know |
# ? Feb 28, 2020 16:33 |
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Nosfereefer posted:pizza delivery guy actually needs to pay his rent, you know boss makes a dollar, i make a dime that's why i gently caress on company time
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# ? Feb 28, 2020 16:34 |
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Yinlock posted:boss makes a dollar, i make a dime |
# ? Feb 28, 2020 16:35 |
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hi, i'm here to pump your septic tank, out back. can i park my truck on your - WHOAAAAAAAAAA
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# ? Feb 28, 2020 16:55 |
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"My goodness, did I get any of that on you?" |
# ? Feb 28, 2020 22:35 |
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Man (pulling out a shoehorn and a pressurized lube dispenser): Alright, this is going to hurt a LOT! Director: Whoa, wait- what the hell are you doing? Man: Uh, I thought this was the anal scene? Director: No, check the script again... Man (reading script): Oh! My apologies; so just straight, boring missionary position is it then? Director: It does say "brutally banal", so yes. Now put away that shoehorn and the pressurized lube dispenser. We can use 'em for the tentacle monster scene |
# ? Feb 28, 2020 22:43 |
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# ? Apr 29, 2024 17:35 |
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Yinlock posted:boss makes a dollar, i make a dime |
# ? Feb 29, 2020 00:16 |