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Organic Lube User posted:Guy walks into a bar and says "Ow." Oo ooo. Two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks. ugh horrible snipe. pony walks into a bar, asks for bartender for a drink, "i'm a little hoarse" (i've hosed this up so many times, saying a little horse walks into a bar) pirate walks into a bar, big old ship steering wheel around his penis, "arrrg, it's drivin' me nuts!" dude walks into a bar, something about wishes, something something, tiny little man playing a piano "didn't ask to be a 10 inch pianist" priest, rapist, and pedophile walks into a bar, the man sits down blahblah, i have like 20 other 'bar' jokes. or like one more. my dad was funny until he drank. haha Also: Rupert Buttermilk posted:Driving through our neighbourhood, I saw a sign that read "Large Garage Sale". I said to my wife "well, if I'm ever in need for a large garage, I know exactly where to go." Did she hit you, or did she laugh? I can dig it, though. blight rhino fucked around with this message at 05:37 on Jun 27, 2021 |
# ? Jun 27, 2021 05:18 |
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# ? May 3, 2024 14:28 |
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blight rhino posted:
https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=Yp5usv_Zg54&list=RDAMVMYp5usv_Zg54
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# ? Jun 27, 2021 06:24 |
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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The Bartender says "What is this, some kind of joke?" A ham sandwich walks into a bar. The bartender says "Sorry, we don't serve food here." A piece of string walks into a bar. Bartender says "Sorry, we don't serve your kind here." So the string goes out back, ties himself into a knot and frays the edges. Walks back into the bar and orders himself a beer. Bartender says "I told you before, we don't serve string in here. Aren't you a piece of sting?" "No. I'm a frayed knot." A roman centurian walks into a bar, holds up two fingers. Says to the bartender, "I'll have 5 drinks please." See, we've all got "X walks into a bar jokes"
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# ? Jun 27, 2021 07:45 |
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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up on its own? It was two tired!
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# ? Jun 27, 2021 10:28 |
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Being an electrician must be tough; I hear they gotta strip to make ends meet.
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# ? Jun 27, 2021 11:32 |
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Why is the capital city of Ireland the fastest growing European city? Because it's Dublin every day.
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# ? Jun 27, 2021 11:47 |
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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face"? The horse just shits on the floor and doesn't say anything, as horses can't talk. I don't know what else you were expecting to happen. Old testament God walks into a bar. He declares everyone there a sinner and strikes them dead. Hmm. This may be more deadpan absurdism and less dad.
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# ? Jun 28, 2021 06:12 |
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I came up with a good punchline when given the set-up: What's the difference between Santa and God? One passes over non-believers in his sleigh, the other slays non-believers during Passover.
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# ? Jun 28, 2021 06:54 |
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Hey what's that Italian coffee-based dessert where you put a scoop of ice cream in a cup and pour espresso over it? "Affogato?" ... Yeah, I forgot too. What's it called?
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# ? Jun 28, 2021 06:57 |
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How do you treat an injury received while playing peek-a-boo? Take them to the ICU.
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# ? Jul 5, 2021 01:54 |
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# ? May 3, 2024 14:28 |
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Silence is golden. Duct tape is silver.
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# ? Jul 5, 2021 01:58 |