UKMT May 2020 - Let them eat Nando's - The Something Awful Forums

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Debate & Discussion > UKMT May 2020 - Let them eat Nando's

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

Soylent Yellow posted:

It's rather telling that livestock is slaughtered with quicker and more reliable methods than people. The US execution methods (lethal injection, as well as the older mostly discontinued methods like the electric chair and gas chamber) just have so many potential points of failiure built into them that I can only assume they're deliberately needlessly complex. I think this is in part due to proponents of the death penalty having a compulsion to add a sense of theatre to the process. Something as quick and simple as a captive bolt gun or nitrogen asphyxiation wouldn't satisfy this need.

I don't think it's necessarily people wanting to get their rocks off that prevents us from lawfully slaughtering people like cattle. "Needless" complexity is a defence against the realisation that we're just animals.

# ¿ May 1, 2020 12:58

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# ¿ May 11, 2024 17:16

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

Why do we always put lords and barons in charge of important inquiries?

Like putting a prisoner on a parole board.

# ¿ May 1, 2020 15:10

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

Prince John posted:

Isn't great leadership when you follow scientific advice and make the right decisions in advance of when they're needed, so you're not playing perpetual catchup? It's almost like a parody account.

"Leadership" means spin.

Which means lying with a straight face and letting the media do its thing so everyone accepts lies as fact.

# ¿ May 1, 2020 23:07

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

I don't see gender, only the manager.

# ¿ May 2, 2020 22:27

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

I played football in uni with a Michael Caine.

# ¿ May 3, 2020 13:30

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

CGI Stardust posted:

Labour has released the 7 Core Principles by which it will provide good, unifying opposition during the crisis

If we need a national consensus we might as well pack it in. We can't even agree on whether milk goes in our tea first or last.

# ¿ May 5, 2020 10:24

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

CGI Stardust posted:

Labour has released the 7 Core Principles by which it will provide good, unifying opposition during the crisis

Only 2, 3 and half of 6 are even relevant. More words = more decorum? Or is that opposition for opposition's sake?

# ¿ May 5, 2020 11:36

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

GazChap posted:

Points 1 and 3 on that graphic are basically the same thing (1 implies 3)

All of the colour choices except 2 and 4 are basically unreadable for people with visual impairments.

Great job!

4 is in direct opposition to 1 & 3

# ¿ May 5, 2020 12:33

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

peanut- posted:

It is four weeks since I was elected leader of the Labour Party. In my acceptance speech I made a commitment to the British people: that I would do my utmost to guide us through these difficult times, to serve all of our communities and to strive for the good of our country. I stand by that commitment.

I said in that speech that we would have the courage to support the government when it was doing the right thing. That is why we supported lockdown, why we supported its extension and why we will support the government later this week when lockdown is reviewed. Saving lives and livelihoods must be our first priority.

But, as I also said four weeks ago, Labour must have the courage to challenge the government when mistakes are being made. The government went into this crisis unprepared and have been behind the curve ever since: too slow to enter lockdown, too slow on testing, too slow on personal protective equipment, too slow to set out an exit strategy.

We need to learn from those mistakes. We cannot be as unprepared for the next phase of this crisis.

That is why I called on the government last month to publish an exit strategy. Not for the lockdown to be lifted, but for a national strategy for how businesses, public services, communities and families could plan and be supported for the future. I welcome the government�s commitment to now do that.

But this cannot be written in isolation. Nor can it be done without an honest conversation with the public. There are no quick fixes to this crisis. We are in this for the long haul. The British people have made huge sacrifices and if we are to take them with us, then they have to be part of the debate about what comes next.

I want to see a national consensus, building on the expertise of business groups, trade unions, public services and other relevant organisations. And I want Labour to be a part of that conversation.

Today I have set out the seven core principles for the government�s exit strategy. These core principles are designed to ensure businesses, public services and communities are supported and kept safe in the weeks ahead.

That means ensuring robust protections when people go back to work or use our public services. A massive expansion in testing and tracing. Having a structured approach to easing and tightening restrictions. And building the NHS�s resilience for the winter.

A vaccine will of course be critical to ending this pandemic. We are unlikely to see one developed for many more months, but it is imperative that we start work now to build the capacity and infrastructure required to distribute it when it is ready.

These are the principles that I will be taking to the prime minister when we speak later this week. And these are the arguments I will be making on behalf of the British people.

Starmer means business, calling for the urgent formation of committees to discuss the options of what we might possibly do, at some point.

# ¿ May 5, 2020 14:28

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

TACD posted:

Nah if the Tories announce it he'll say something like "let's not charge headlong into massive unprecedented changes" and everyone will nod sagely at his strong opposition

Have we asked businesses what they think? Forensic.

# ¿ May 5, 2020 15:44

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

feedmegin posted:

It's not even an affair. They had a poly/open relationship thing going on, nobody was cheating. Good luck expecting the press to explain that in a nuanced fashion though.

That makes me less inclined to trust that scientist's judgement tbf.

# ¿ May 6, 2020 13:46

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

I always assumed Boris was tall. He seems more oaf than weasel idk.

# ¿ May 6, 2020 17:03

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

baka kaba posted:

The whole "people are getting addicted to being furloughed" poo poo makes me think the government was hoping people would get fed up and start ignoring the lockdown a lot more than they are.

They didn't want or expect the public (and many businesses) to call for a lockdown in the first place. Their social scientists told them the Great British Public wouldn't stand for that sort of nonsense. Stiff upper lip, take it on the chin etc.

Can't even astroturf an anti-lockdown movement properly, lazy bastards.

# ¿ May 8, 2020 00:36

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

TACD posted:

I think if the media vaguely blames it on �a percentage of the population who didn�t respect the lockdown� everyone will quite happily fill in the blanks themselves with either an ethnic minority or teenagers or �that cow across the road�.

There are cows in the field at the bottom of my garden at the moment and a couple of them were giving me the evils all afternoon.

# ¿ May 8, 2020 00:42

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

GazChap posted:

I left my house last night to go and get some fish�n�chips, just as the 8pm clap started. Everybody was doing it, which made me feel a little bad that we haven�t been. It also felt massively uncomfortable, like everyone was sarcastically clapping my decision to not cook for myself.

Bit late but I'm giving you a round now as well.

# ¿ May 8, 2020 11:08

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

OwlFancier posted:

As long as people are working from home and keeping more apart at work and in stores that will help, demented suicidal old boomers were never the barometer for effectivness and if they want to kill themselves I don't care so long as they can keep the harm they do to everyone else to a minimum.

Yeah, gently caress the NHS.

# ¿ May 8, 2020 11:32

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

Wales' lockdown's continuing for at least another 3 weeks.

# ¿ May 8, 2020 15:08

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

Kin posted:

Is there an accurate breakdown of corona-virus deaths per country in the UK? With there possibly being different approaches i'm just curious if England by itself has gone past Italy.

Wales is officially 1,090.

# ¿ May 8, 2020 22:00

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

namesake posted:

Nah gently caress this argument, we must keep borders open as much as possible in all circumstances.

In this circumstance what countries like New Zealand did was way better than our response.

# ¿ May 10, 2020 00:45

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

Some people are putting a lot of effort into reframing Boris and his pals in the top positions as the friendly Tories looking out for us, with some unnamed venomous snakes trying desperately to take him down every Saturday morning on CITV.

The "changed man" narrative has spun off into this new thing where every decision is now being contextualised as for/against/influenced by supposed men behind a curtain.

# ¿ May 10, 2020 11:31

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

We can't furlough people forever. We have to accept that those jobs never needed doing and were just busywork to further enrich capital and prop up a work-to-live model of society that doesn't make sense since we're just too good at making all the things we need with fewer and fewer people.

# ¿ May 10, 2020 18:07

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

JeremoudCorbynejad posted:

This is awesome but it does mean that landlords get away with selling their properties for a tidy sum, necks intact, which I'm not sure I'm comfortable with.

As long as they're off the plane it doesn't matter if we give them a parachute or a bullet. The burden is gone.

# ¿ May 11, 2020 17:18

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

XMNN posted:

yep, but I'm pretty sure a bit of counter factual brown nosing is probably a requirement for tory mps asking boris a question

If anyone else is confused by his rambling incoherent answer, which actually makes it even less clear whether the prohibition applies to tourism in Wales in general or just to travelling to a holiday home, according to that 50 page document it's tourism in general
(emphasis there's)

You'd think given that "it's so important that we should try and get as much er as much clarity as possible, and I hope that the house does understand that when you're making changes o-of this complexity, the messaging i-is is crucial but it is also difficult", he'd want to perhaps send a clear message that you should respect the advice of the individual national governments, and perhaps emphasise that as things stand that means that you can't got to Wales.

I'm amazed by how lovely a public speaker he is, is it part of his shambling act? I'm not sure how it helps, when if he wasn't quite so stumbling he could get all his flowery words and half-baked classics references in and I don't think it would harm his carefully cultivated day-drinking public school boy image too much?

e: maybe it's a genuine stutter? I'll feel bad if I'm mocking him for an actual speech impediment rather than being an utterly worthless human being

Put on an act long enough and it becomes genuine.

# ¿ May 11, 2020 17:39

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

Flipswitch posted:

https://twitter.com/AledGwynWiliams/status/1259826054862176257

oval office.

Shrewsbury's always been weird about Wales. Bit like Bristol where you had to be careful about sounding "too Welsh" because of the reaction some people would have.

# ¿ May 12, 2020 09:20

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

Aphex- posted:

I have literally never come across this while living in Bristol.

Maybe it's just the football brings it out of people. Or it's just a Welsh urban legend. Not spent much time in Bristol personally, but have heard plenty of versions of the "woman behind the counter in the chippy ignored me when she heard my accent" story.

# ¿ May 12, 2020 10:58

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

HJB posted:

I just remembered McDonalds are opening some of their restaurants up today:

https://twitter.com/McDonaldsUK/status/1257595625757122560

Seems like Wednesday has been known in some circles as the Big Day for more than a week.

More likely the government is following McDonalds lead, as they did before.

# ¿ May 13, 2020 10:59

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

Communist Thoughts posted:

Lol that the papers just won over the "doves" with their powers to shape false reality and theyr just gonna nudge us all into even more mega death

But more people will buy papers.

# ¿ May 13, 2020 11:47

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

Someone message the cleaning woman and she can decide which she'd prefer.

# ¿ May 13, 2020 22:36

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

forkboy84 posted:

Cleaner-gate hits a new high/low

https://twitter.com/miss_l_locket/status/1260836701242605568?s=20

Different kind of "cleaner".

# ¿ May 14, 2020 10:16

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

There were definitely some pillocks banging pots and pans a few minutes ago, which I thought was just bad parenting.

First time I've heard a peep around here.

# ¿ May 14, 2020 20:09

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

jabby posted:

It's a loving joke dude, I don't think it really deserved three people aggressively telling me what a oval office I am.

I literally stopped checking this thread because instead of an outlet it turned into something actively harmful to my mental health, and months later it doesn't seem to be any different. Maybe I've missed all the good, positive stuff and just happened to turn up at yet another argument about whether to quit Labour, but it really doesn't surprise me to read posts like the one by justcola. I mean gently caress, I meet people dying of Covid who depress me less than reading a few pages here.

More like babby.

# ¿ May 15, 2020 15:46

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

Private Speech posted:

Why couldn't the parents just, uhh, pick him up at their place if that's the only way.

Or if they have any extended family then have take care of the kids instead of exposing elderly parents to covid.

The parents wouldn't have been able to flash a piece of paper that says "I'm Dominic Cummings I can have you fired" to any police that might have stopped them on the road.

# ¿ May 23, 2020 00:40

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

https://twitter.com/trishgreenhalgh/status/1264060733152727042?s=20

# ¿ May 23, 2020 13:04

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

I'll be telling my mum next time she calls that the government says it's okay to bring some shopping round if she cares about me.

# ¿ May 23, 2020 17:12

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

thespaceinvader posted:

How is it THIS that makes the comfortable middle class types rage?

Not the highest homeless population in living memory, not bombs we made murdering innocent children, not the Tories murdering innocent disabled people, not all the injustices against immigrants and workers, not the mere existence of billionaires, not decades of institutionalised racism in the police and child abuse in the upper echelons of power but... one dude breaking the rules?

Why is it this that gets peoples' goat?

It's a lot easier to get at one person objectively doing something against the rules than it is a group of people acting in a way that causes more suffering and less fairness than could otherwise have been possible.

One villain is a good target, even if society is the greater monster.

# ¿ May 24, 2020 15:58

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

Z the IVth posted:

Call the Plod?

It's not a crime to care about your kid's birthday. Not sure what the police could possibly do.

# ¿ May 24, 2020 15:59

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

dispatch_async posted:

https://twitter.com/BethRigby/status/1264571893492965376

If he was married to Dom this would be so much easier for him.

# ¿ May 24, 2020 16:08

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

It's almost as if the tories want people to not take lockdown rules seriously, after being forced into establishing a lockdown they didn't want due to public pressure in the first place.

# ¿ May 24, 2020 18:42

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

Marmaduke! posted:

It absolutely worked for David Cameron but it's not the sort of trick you can roll out every time

Difference this time is we're all in Dom Cum's position with kids we can't stand wanting to foist them off on the grandparents, but we were told it wasn't allowed.

# ¿ May 24, 2020 20:34

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# ¿ May 11, 2024 17:16

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

https://twitter.com/luke_duff/status/1264645503687503878?s=20

# ¿ May 24, 2020 21:22

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