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Heather Papps posted:in the winter i try and wear bright summery things to counteract the weathers dampening of mood and today i learned that this hat: PLease share your stories and support of hummingbird violence itt. |
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May 30, 2020 04:04
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| # ? May 12, 2024 20:16 |
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I don't want to be exclusive or anything so i will open this up to all victims of bird attacks really. Don't ever forget that they are miniature fluffy dinosaurs and would eat you if they could fit you in their tiny dainty birb beaks.. In college there was a really mean goose with a growth on its nose that would chase you and honk at you (esp. if you were drunk. pretty sure it was a narc) and we called it triceragoose because it looked like a triceratops and also because it was the descendant of those terrible lizards
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May 30, 2020 04:07
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ive never been attaked by a bird but my mum AND my dad have brought dead bird carcasses back to paint. they aleays go in the freezer and they forget about them and never paint them |
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May 30, 2020 04:35
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in 7th grade I was in some elective class called "leadership skills." I was a talkative, facetious teenling and a lot of my teacher's found it amusing but my Leadership teacher did not, irreverence was like sacrilege to her. a series of disruptive responses or participations later, one finally broke the camel's back and got me kicked out: We had to start class by going around and telling everyone one thing we were grateful for that day(technically we started each class by walking through the door and had to choose between high five/hug/handshake/or do a jig). I said "I was grateful I hadn't been attacked by a flock of seagulls" and she like lit, up never saw her so angry, sent me outside then to principals and counselors to schedule a different class for that time period. |
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May 30, 2020 04:51
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bird pooped on me a few times, dont take a nap on a bench outside by trees is all i know |
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May 30, 2020 04:52
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When I was a kid I was chilling in a park often and there was water and there also were geese. One of them always patrolled the area and whenever you came too close to another person, the water, a tree, a trash can or in general proximity of that one goose with changing tolerated distances, hellfire would rain down on you. It started honking from a mile away and rushed towards you, drawing closer with each passing second. You can run, but you can't hide. And once it got to you, you were attacked with a series of biting attacks mixed with violent bloodthirsty honking. To this day, this goose is still there, lurking. Sometimes at night, sometimes at day, but everyone around town knows, if you hear the silent, distant sound of an angry honk, you should flee screaming.
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May 30, 2020 11:25
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I am a hummingbird and I believe you have misinterpreted our actions. we are simply trying to drink the sweet nectar from your eyes nose mouth and ears. what’s the big deal? it will refill eventually
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May 30, 2020 13:03
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a few years i just walking along the sidewalk and a bird buzzed me, smacked me in the head. it was probably defending a nest? there were lots of trees nearby when it happened for some reason my phone wouldn't connect to the nearest tower so i couldn't text anyone about it!!
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May 30, 2020 14:53
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partridge are really good at hiding and looking like a pile of leaves, and i have never seen my dad laugh so hard as when one burst up right before i stepped on it and flew away shrieking while i was knocked on my rear end they are tiny but look at this:  terrifying
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May 30, 2020 16:18
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one summer a blue jay decided our pool was his stomping ground. unfortunately that was my chosen exercise locale for the summer i would go out there and use a kickboard and for the whole time i was in there i could hear him doing close flybys at my head. it really added excitement to the workout
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May 30, 2020 19:22
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Training for the inevitable apocalypse coming from very far above
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May 30, 2020 19:25
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 Angry. Photo credit: Glenn Bartley (I have no idea who he is) |
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May 30, 2020 20:02
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I saw a swan the size of a frickin' ostrich
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May 30, 2020 20:22
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Doctor Dogballs posted:I saw a swan the size of a frickin' ostrich Pretty standard, really. The one thing cartoons and photographs don't always convey well about swans is how enormous they are. Their wings are like clubs, they can beat you to death with them if they're lucky. |
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May 30, 2020 20:45
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| Ouch oof i am being attacked right now i could really use some support | |
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May 30, 2020 21:20
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Putty posted:Ouch oof i am being attacked right now i could really use some support it'll be okay just go for a walk to burn off the fight or flight
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May 30, 2020 23:04
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Finger Prince posted:
If you needed a constant supply of nectar to live you'd be angry whenever you weren't chugging any too.
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May 31, 2020 00:39
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saw a cormorant being rescued (had a plastic six pack holder around its neck) and decide that it didn't like the whole situation so it decided to ring bark the person's thumb seen a kid teasing a big old wedge tailed eagle at an injured wild life recovery place and very nearly get his nose taken off (teacher yanked them away hard enough for them to fall on their rear end just at the last second) Australian magpies here get pretty toey too around nesting time - if they know you it's generally okay but otherwise they can swoop you and even do some pretty nasty damage - there was a woman in NSW many years back who got her eyeball torn open by one. fortunately they were able to reinflate it and restore most of her vision
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May 31, 2020 01:05
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surprised nobody has brought up grackles yet. |
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May 31, 2020 02:38
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I have stumbled upon killdeer near their nest before (they just make them in the ground in the middle of a field or something because well their brains are tiny And they don’t understand that mowers are a thing sorry killdeer!) and drat they want to fight you. Actually they act like they are gonna fight you until you get really close to their nest and then they fly away dramatically to get you to chase them and not find their nest because that is what real love is.
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May 31, 2020 04:03
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Kaiser Schnitzel posted:I have stumbled upon killdeer near their nest before (they just make them in the ground in the middle of a field or something because well their brains are tiny And they don’t understand that mowers are a thing sorry killdeer!) and drat they want to fight you. Actually they act like they are gonna fight you until you get really close to their nest and then they fly away dramatically to get you to chase them and not find their nest because that is what real love is. Killdeer are the biggest drama queens of the bird world. The slightest little thing and they're up in the air going DEEEdeedeedeedee and spooking everything else. Then there's the whole flopping on the ground pretending their wing is broken like "oh I am slain!". They're just so extra. But their babies are the cutest things ever. 
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May 31, 2020 04:39
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a hummingbird got stuck in my patio today and it is a very strange thing trying to rescue something you know in your bones is extremely fragile. it was banging against the clear roof panels all confused, and i held a broom to it for it to alight upon, but would take off towards the panels as soon as i tried moving the broom towards escape. eventually, (i guess the whole thing took only a few moments but it felt like a long time), i grabbed a chair and a fabric grocery bag and very gently wrapped him up and carried my friendship burrito and released him. i was very afraid to hurt it. i guess i should fill up my feeder, but the bear in town has been poking around so they asked folk to stop putting out seed/suet/syrup feeders.
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Jun 1, 2020 00:04
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Heather Papps posted:a hummingbird got stuck in my patio today and it is a very strange thing trying to rescue something you know in your bones is extremely fragile. it was banging against the clear roof panels all confused, and i held a broom to it for it to alight upon, but would take off towards the panels as soon as i tried moving the broom towards escape. do you live in alaska or like wtf? bears? |
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Jun 1, 2020 00:29
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clammy posted:do you live in alaska or like wtf? bears? northern ontario, across the lake from michigan. it's pretty wild and even though i live in a town of over a thousand, (i think?), i'm right on the edge so if a bear is gonna come looking for snacks i guess they come my way. i found some reno trash bags with bear claw marks in them, but they are lil cowardly black bears unless you gently caress up and get between a momma and cubs.
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Jun 1, 2020 00:38
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Heather Papps posted:a hummingbird got stuck in my patio today and it is a very strange thing trying to rescue something you know in your bones is extremely fragile. it was banging against the clear roof panels all confused, and i held a broom to it for it to alight upon, but would take off towards the panels as soon as i tried moving the broom towards escape. when a dove flew into the house and started to panic and bang his head against the windows and the sliders i spent minutes thumbtacking sheets over all the windows and half one of the sliders. then i left the one slider open and tried to convince him to go that way. he finally flew like a madman through the open door. then i had to take down all the sheets. he never even said thank you,
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Jun 1, 2020 00:47
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Once I had to catch a bat in the work lunch room. It was difficult, they're wily and agile. Eventually the poor guy got exhausted from flying around and landed on the windowsill panting like crazy so I was able to throw a bag over him and bring him outside where he flew off. Catching bats is hard work. |
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Jun 1, 2020 00:51
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FluffieDuckie posted:when a dove flew into the house and started to panic and bang his head against the windows and the sliders i spent minutes thumbtacking sheets over all the windows and half one of the sliders. then i left the one slider open and tried to convince him to go that way. he finally flew like a madman through the open door. then i had to take down all the sheets. I’m sorry thank u
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Jun 1, 2020 01:36
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FluffieDuckie posted:one summer a blue jay decided our pool was his stomping ground. unfortunately that was my chosen exercise locale for the summer please post about thunk |
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Jun 1, 2020 03:37
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alnilam posted:please post about thunk Oh yeah. Thunk. For newbies, the picture I cut out was the av of byob poster bwee https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3704117&userid=0&perpage=40&pagenumber=1
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Jun 1, 2020 06:51
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Stoner Sloth posted:Australian magpies here get pretty toey too around nesting time - if they know you it's generally okay but otherwise they can swoop you and even do some pretty nasty damage - there was a woman in NSW many years back who got her eyeball torn open by one. fortunately they were able to reinflate it and restore most of her vision Did you mean to type NSFL  
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Jun 2, 2020 07:10
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my heart is racing holy gently caress okay so this rescue was not as easy and has inspired me to figure out some way to prevent this from happening because this is clearly a trend. bumblebees may do the same thing but come morning they see the bright and go towards it but hot drat one of these friends could die if i wasn't around to catch them pictured: a hummingbirb attempting to wedge itself in between the panel and the beam, attempting to escape a giant muttering "oh no lil buddy oh no ohnoohno" 
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Jun 5, 2020 15:52
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lure it out with a juicy steak op hummingbirbs like it medium well Areola Grande fucked around with this message at 16:31 on Jun 5, 2020
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Jun 5, 2020 16:21
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oh nooo! poor little sweetie
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Jun 5, 2020 16:25
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it was a harrowing experience, any other bird common to my region would be less fragile and i could rescue without so much fear of crushing it. i am currently googling "how to stop hummingbirds" and variants
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Jun 5, 2020 17:23
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at my old job sometimes hummingbirds would get caught in the spiderwebs and it was sad  They are so tiny and light. Sometimes we could save them if we saw it happen but sometimes we would just come in in the morning to find a hummingbird stuck in the corner. They usually recovered well in a few minutes. Their lil hearts beat so fast
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Jun 5, 2020 18:11
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i have a crabapple tree in bloom directly across from the patio windows, and i live on the second floor. it's an old florist shop kitbashed into a house so it's weird. after some googling i have removed all the brightly coloured objects within line of sight so i am hoping very much this works because stapling chicken wire or keeping the shutters always closed are my other two options. i should look up how hummingbird vision works maybe i can use glow in the dark or florescent stuff to make them an exit sign?
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Jun 5, 2020 19:36
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I just got buzzed by a freakin h-bird while peacefully sitting on my porch having a beer! Will nobody rid me of these meddlesome birds!!
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Sep 18, 2022 00:29
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Kaiser Schnitzel posted:I just got buzzed by a freakin h-bird while peacefully sitting on my porch having a beer! Will nobody rid me of these meddlesome birds!! one got WAY too close 2 me while I was taking a walk 2day. the fright nearly put me in my grave! |
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Sep 18, 2022 00:38
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lil fucker is about the size of a carpenter bee and is sticking its nose all up in my phlox by my porch and buzzing RIGHT next to my head
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Sep 18, 2022 00:41
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| # ? May 12, 2024 20:16 |
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thank the lord yob i have not endured an attack this year, but i took lessons from past years into consideration
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Sep 18, 2022 00:42
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