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guy: ok so hear me out, so it's a show, right, and it's about wardrobe malfunctions happening at just the wrong time TV executives: *wait expectantly* guy: any second now, I swear. this has never happened before TV executives: get out guy: *leaves in shame with his pants still securely round his waist* Stooge fucked around with this message at 16:26 on Jun 11, 2020 |
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Jun 10, 2020 12:15
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Ok, it's about these guys and they hang around and poo poo. I mean, um, like they do miscellaneous things, not that they're actually making GBS threads on camera. Nervous laugh
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Jun 10, 2020 13:38
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*running fast to slip into the elevator before it closes* "phew, that was a close one! so, lemme give you my... elevator pitch." "this is highly inappropriate given the current health crisis. this lack of lucidity and self awareness tells me that no, i do not wish to hear it, and i would ask politely you get off at the next floor before i call security."
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Jun 10, 2020 23:21
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*baseball hits the coffee table* |
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Jun 11, 2020 00:11
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"It's a procedural cop drama," I say while I gesticulate wildly. "But get this." I lick my lips. Sweat is dripping from my brow now. "The cop's partner is a peanut butter and jelly sandwich." *silence* https://giant.gfycat.com/SizzlingThickIbis.mp4 |
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Jun 11, 2020 04:57
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Literally A Person posted:"It's a procedural cop drama," I say while I gesticulate wildly. "But get this." I lick my lips. Sweat is dripping from my brow now. "The cop's partner is a peanut butter and jelly sandwich."
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Jun 11, 2020 10:49
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ok, so *snifff* it's a, it's a show wh-- *snrrrrt* *8 ball of cocaine falls out of pant leg* poo poo, lemme get-- *pants rip* *more cocaine falls out of butt*
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Jun 11, 2020 16:07
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It's a show where a guy with kids from a previous marriage and a woman with kids from a previous marriage on a banana farm. It's called the Brady Buncha Bananas! I'll see myself out **throws a banana peel on the floor on the way out** |
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Jun 11, 2020 16:21
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"All right, Marty. This one's really gonna knock your socks off!!" My polyester suit is clinging to my back and chest. It's plain to see from the growing stains on my light colored shirt that I'm really sweating now. "Marty baby, have you ever heard of this kid John Leguizamo??" My horn-rimmed dime-store glasses are slowly sliding down my face. "He's gonna be a star, Marty." I need this so bad and Marty knows it. The fucker knows it. "Well we've been in talks and we're thinking Seinfeld meets Battlestar Galactica." My right arm is numb. "Imagine it!!!" My tongue feels swollen like I'm talking with a shoe in my mouth. I collapse. "Marty?" "Baby?" https://giant.gfycat.com/SizzlingThickIbis.mp4 |
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Jun 11, 2020 16:31
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tv executive: are you going to pitch a show or what? me: let me answer your question with one of my own—have you ever wondered what the Kit Kat sticks talk about inside the package? tv exec: oh god what is that smell?
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Jun 11, 2020 19:21
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It's like Wifeswap but from the Wife's point of view so it's called Selfswap
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Jun 11, 2020 19:59
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nut posted:tv executive: are you going to pitch a show or what?
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Jun 11, 2020 22:05
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the show is called hot knife, and let me telFUCK OUCH gently caress *smoke begins to rise from the now panicked pitch person, and the sound of a red hot knife burning through a pocket is heard*
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Jun 11, 2020 22:11
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“It’s about a tree.” “A tree that does what?” “Be a tree.” “But what does it do?” “Pitch.”  It’s me, I’m the tree. |
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Jun 12, 2020 02:14
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The Mighty Moltres posted:“It’s about a tree.”
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Jun 12, 2020 02:49
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The Mighty Moltres posted:“It’s about a tree.”
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Jun 12, 2020 11:39
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"It's a show about umm... about... this guy who comes in and err....... pitches shows for a TV series. He keeps suggesting all of these wacky shows and it almost seems like he doesn't know what he's talking about, but he does! He comes up with some crazy good ideas like... err...... *picks up a mug* a show about a coffee cup... I mean COFFEE, right? Like that show Friends and that place with the coffee mugs... *takes a deep breath* Or a show that involves...... A DESK! LIKE IN THAT OFFICE SHOW! Those crazy people and their wackiness! *wipes sweat from brow*... The opportunities are endless!" |
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Jun 12, 2020 22:46
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So every week we get a different celebrity to- get this-- **gestures wildly with hands** SMUGGLE HAMS OUT OF A SUPERMARKET |
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Jun 12, 2020 23:50
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Me, a tv exec, and a dick sucking trolley robot walk into an elevator. Guess who walks out with 5 year contract for a tv series!!! |
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Jun 12, 2020 23:52
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So it's like Teen Wolf, but with geriatrics. Get this: A virus turns everyone aged 55-70 into wearwolves. Really targets the zeitgeist of younger folks thinking boomers just destroy everything they touch. Season 2 introduces 20-35 year olds becoming vampires to parody older folks seeing millennials as leeches. |
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Jun 13, 2020 05:27
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Me: So it's like the hunger games, but with TV executives! Look, I even brought a pile of weapons with me! Executives: uhhhhhh Me: *locks door*
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Jun 13, 2020 08:09
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I'm laying on the ground convulsing now. "MARTY!!! IT'S 90210 but in a retirement community!!!"
https://giant.gfycat.com/SizzlingThickIbis.mp4 |
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Jun 13, 2020 16:20
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| It's a game show for plants | |
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Jun 13, 2020 22:25
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Mr. Ficus, you're just one question away from taking home the big prize. Twenty million dollars on the line. How do you feel *sounds of photosynthesis and rustling* |
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Jun 13, 2020 22:28
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And the category for the twenty million dollar prize is... "Common vegetarian dishes..." ... (the hosts eyes widen briefly. he clears his throat while signaling for the producer to cut to commercial) Heh, folks we'll be right b |
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Jun 13, 2020 22:30
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| # ? May 7, 2024 21:05 |
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okay so if you win first prize i guess you get this bush.
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Jun 14, 2020 00:05
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