ITT let's send the first message on a dating website

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > BYOB Goldmine: Gold Mango > ITT let's send the first message on a dating website

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vanisher

Hey babe great dog! I love dogs.

# ? Jun 15, 2020 04:47

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 9, 2024 14:32

vanisher

Holy smokes you went to Hawaii? SO JEALOUS!

_{Sig images courtesy of the talented Luvcow, Dumb Sex-Parrot, & Death Sext}

# ? Jun 15, 2020 04:48

vanisher

I'd love to see you pour blue fluid on a tampon 1x/month

# ? Jun 15, 2020 04:49

Twenty Four

"Are you into photography? Because those are some impressively flattering camera angles you pulled off there!"

# ? Jun 15, 2020 07:13

Yinlock

I'm not short,

# ? Jun 15, 2020 07:42

oliwan: by Nyc_Tattoo

hey babe check out this picture of my huge daikon

# ? Jun 15, 2020 08:37

SeaGoatSupreme: Ask me about fixed-gear bikes (aka "fixies")

Why are you on this website, am I not young enough for you now?

We can talk about this after I pick up jaxson from soccer practice

# ? Jun 15, 2020 08:42

Stooge

we should meet up and empty quote each other all night long

# ? Jun 15, 2020 10:12

Yinlock

First of all, if you aren't serious about dungeon hygiene then don't bother

# ? Jun 15, 2020 10:16

Goons Are Gifts

Hey
What's your primary prey here?

# ? Jun 15, 2020 12:39

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

i hope u like em stall, dark and handsome

spring sigs by nesamdoom and Ravenous Scoot

# ? Jun 15, 2020 16:56

The Mighty Moltres: Come! We must fly!

Do you like LEGO?
Because I'm a stud

# ? Jun 15, 2020 17:04

frump truck: hello... again!

hey. sup. whatsup. hello. hi. hay. how you doin. how ARE you doing. quarantine eh?? step on my face

# ? Jun 15, 2020 17:15

frump truck: hello... again!

IF you were a perfectly proportioned geometric cube (and I'm not saying that you ARE, or have to be, just a little thought experiment

) then what would be the distance between your diagonally-aligned vertices given a side length of s = 4.3cm

# ? Jun 15, 2020 17:19

biosterous

hey, i just met you,
and this is crazy,
but yes, those are my real teeth,
why does everyone keep asking if my teeth are real,
please don't ask me anything about my teeth

^{^{thank you saoshyant for this sig!!!}}
^{^{gallery of sigs}}

he/him

# ? Jun 15, 2020 17:41

nut

biosterous posted:

hey, i just met you,
and this is crazy,
but yes, those are my real teeth,
why does everyone keep asking if my teeth are real,
please don't ask me anything about my teeth

# ? Jun 15, 2020 17:45

oliwan: by Nyc_Tattoo

hot knife to meet you!!

# ? Jun 15, 2020 18:08

Stooge

do you like long walks on the beach and crying in public bathrooms

# ? Jun 15, 2020 18:20

vanisher

WOW two kids what a handful! How serious of a relationship are you looking for if you don't mind me asking?

_{Sig images courtesy of the talented Luvcow, Dumb Sex-Parrot, & Death Sext}

# ? Jun 15, 2020 19:08

FutonForensic

hey bb. what zone are u in. im in zone 6 so I shouldn't be having so much trouble growing basil, but I'm just not getting the growth I'm looking for. I'm worried it's a pH issue; let me know what your soil balance is and we can compare notes. also i have a thing for bunions, nbd. Great talking with you

# ? Jun 15, 2020 19:11

vanisher

Oh thanks for liking my pic! That was kind of an homage to my late brother (it's him not me, i'm the blurry guy off frame to the right. Well, that's my torso at least).

_{Sig images courtesy of the talented Luvcow, Dumb Sex-Parrot, & Death Sext}

# ? Jun 15, 2020 19:12

nut

r u a Calvin or a Hobbes? (I�m a nurmal)

# ? Jun 15, 2020 19:16

vanisher

Hello! I'm a healthy 48 year old (age is just a number!) and as you can see from the attached pictures from 10 years ago I am extremely pale and not afraid to show it. Please take special note the picture I think is my best, where I drape my grotesque ancient frame on a lawn chair and tilt my sunglasses down over my nose while winking at the camera. Please reply quickly! Everyone deserves respect, which I define as you sleeping with me at your place only so my wife doesn't find out. Thank you and god bless!

# ? Jun 15, 2020 19:24

Groove Champion

Did you want to do some vore roleplay before we meet up?

# ? Jun 15, 2020 19:54

Escape From Noise

Yes. I'm fat and ugly, but I also have several glaring character flaws!

# ? Jun 15, 2020 20:48

Goons Are Gifts

vanisher posted:

WOW two kids what a handful! How serious of a relationship are you looking for if you don't mind me asking?

# ? Jun 15, 2020 21:12

magic cactus: We lied. We are not at war. There is no enemy. This is a rescue operation.

buy ME pizza and touch MY butt

Thanks to Saoshyant for the amazing spring '23 sig!

# ? Jun 15, 2020 23:02

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

magic cactus posted:

buy ME pizza and touch MY butt

# ? Jun 15, 2020 23:21

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

vanisher posted:

WOW two kids what a handful! How serious of a relationship are you looking for if you don't mind me asking?

# ? Jun 15, 2020 23:21

Yinlock

vanisher posted:

WOW two kids what a handful! How serious of a relationship are you looking for if you don't mind me asking?

# ? Jun 15, 2020 23:44

Yinlock

Rejected

# ? Jun 15, 2020 23:44

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

girl I bet u smell just like the inside of my momma's purse

spring sigs by nesamdoom and Ravenous Scoot

# ? Jun 16, 2020 00:15

Manifisto

hey babe, u look like ur gregorian in the streets, xiuhpohualli in the sheets

ty nesamdoom!

# ? Jun 16, 2020 00:32

vanisher

CHOOSE WISELY sorceress, for you stand before SIR POUNDTHOR, and he will offer you an adventure of such magnitude that your boring peasant life will be shattered beyond repair. TRAVEL WITH ME to the land of Tiki Town Adventure Golf and if ye do not already own a putter, do not worry for Sir Poundthor will provide the necessary $3 for you to rent one. Upon finishing we shall dine upon DELICIOUS CORN DOGS at the wienerschnitzel nearby. WHAT SAY YOU.

_{Sig images courtesy of the talented Luvcow, Dumb Sex-Parrot, & Death Sext}

# ? Jun 16, 2020 00:32

Manifisto

hi there, like what would you do if some guy asked you a really random question like "are there stairs in your house," haha that would be kind of a loser thing to ask but just for fun what would you say

ty nesamdoom!

# ? Jun 16, 2020 00:37

nut

magic cactus posted:

buy ME pizza and touch MY butt

# ? Jun 16, 2020 00:39

biosterous

Manifisto posted:

hi there, like what would you do if some guy asked you a really random question like "are there stairs in your house," haha that would be kind of a loser thing to ask but just for fun what would you say

^{^{thank you saoshyant for this sig!!!}}
^{^{gallery of sigs}}

he/him

# ? Jun 16, 2020 02:59

Bright Bart: False. There is only one electron and it has never stopped

I am listening to rap lyrics I would love to share but they have A LOT of racial slurs.

# ? Jun 16, 2020 05:50

Bright Bart: False. There is only one electron and it has never stopped

SeaGoatSupreme posted:

Why are you on this website, am I not young enough for you now?

We can talk about this after I pick up jaxson from soccer practice

Please tell me all about fixed gear bicycles

# ? Jun 16, 2020 06:39

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 9, 2024 14:32

Space Taxi

Me posting before everyone else is NOT a sign of desperation. (Please reply to me first)

# ? Jun 16, 2020 08:44

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > BYOB Goldmine: Gold Mango > ITT let's send the first message on a dating website

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