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Simple is a series of games started by D3 Publisher to fill a certain deep and dark market niche: the bargain bins. It succeeded beyond imagination, expanding into hundreds of entries across multiple platforms. Most of those games are terrible. Some are also funny. Many were localized only for the European market thanks to the efforts of 505 Gamestreet. The company also wanted bargain-bin games to tap into lean Italian wallets more efficiently. I don't know if the plan was successful, but 505 is still in business. I've already presented a few abominable Riho Futaba games, but Simple is not all about swimsuits. There's also shooting, tanks, zombies, and teeth. <==a video *Metropolismanias were not originally Simple 2000 titles but got re-issued as a part of the series. BYOSimple If you've got any of games from the series and wanted an excuse to record them, now is the time. Somebody, do Zombie Attack. It's the one where you save people from hopping Chinese vampires. Meanwhile, I'll join whatever outfit this is and go win WWII: <== <== <== <== <== <== In an parallel universe, P. W. Hawk is trying his hand at city planing. Meanwhile, in This Hole's construction offices Years later, a discovery of Dragon Sisters is made at a site of one of our battles. After peace had returned, P. W. Hawk had to go back to living with mom P. W. Hawk is confused because this is another game not in the series. As a military man, P. W. Hawk once commanded a special forces unit in Japan, outfitted with obsolete weaponry. Suddenly, an old friend with a new ID bursts into the scene! After boxing, everyone need to check in with THE Dentist. P. W. Hawk is cheering for the Normal Tank Girl from the sidelines. Bomb defusal in a cargo plane? Why, at this point, not? When your bomb busting fails, and there's no radio helicopter around, who you're gonna call? The final helicoptering game is here to show us how to make everything harder with radio helicopters. Let's build another city, more terrible than the last! Protecting the planet from aliens, one battle animation at a time. P.W. Hawk's ancestors were a noisy bunch. Meanwhile, back at the farm... Zombies have taken over the city! This is the end... See you later, Panty Waste Hawk. SelenicMartian fucked around with this message at 13:44 on Mar 4, 2021 |
# ? Jun 23, 2020 15:43 |
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# ? May 4, 2024 22:13 |
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Earth Defense Force was once a Simple series title, if I recall. Though perhaps the most delightfully outlandish one I remember seeing was THE Zombie Vs. Ambulance (Zombie Virus in Europe).
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# ? Jun 23, 2020 16:24 |
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Panty Waste Hawk is the best name in all of videogames and I'm glad we've started this LP with such an amazing name. I genuinely wonder why the game even let you name yourself though, when nothing you could've written would've ever reached such glorious heights.
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# ? Jun 23, 2020 17:02 |
Now I'm really sad that this game isn't voiced. e: I think this was the word they were going for? anilEhilated fucked around with this message at 17:42 on Jun 23, 2020 |
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# ? Jun 23, 2020 17:39 |
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One Minecraft themed EDF is coming out later this year and EDF6 the year after. That Simple series franchise still does a great job since Monster Attack. https://imgur.com/a/Pc1xwmh I thought I recognized that game from somewhere. Scalding Coffee fucked around with this message at 20:19 on Jun 23, 2020 |
# ? Jun 23, 2020 18:15 |
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The reveal of the size of the stack in the first video was Edit: Even the fake gun names are lazy in this game. They didn't even remove a whole letter from the M1911 or M1A1. EasilyConfused fucked around with this message at 21:16 on Jun 23, 2020 |
# ? Jun 23, 2020 20:36 |
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anilEhilated posted:Now I'm really sad that this game isn't voiced. It's so budget even the Japanese version only had a voice for that opening scene. Not including the randomised name, alas. EasilyConfused posted:The reveal of the size of the stack in the first video was Glad you mentioned that because I missed that that was a video. And yeah the bottom left section on the dentist back cover says something about advertising and hiring, though given how much of the manual is devoted to specific tooth treatments it's probably pretty surface-level.
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# ? Jun 24, 2020 01:47 |
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As somewhat of a gun nerd the naming in this game is driving me nuts. So both the 1911 and the Thompson should have an M instead if an N, otherwise they are correct. What your game labels as a Gev43 is most likely a Gewehr 43/Karabiner 43, but something is wrong with the profile of the stock and those optics don't look like anything in particular. What is super weirding me out though is that they replaced M with N, and W with V. Just chop the letters in half, no one will notice. I wonder if it was like that before localization. Maybe done to avoid infringement? I'm nearly certain all these guns are old enough that it shouldn't be any issue. 1911 refers to the year the gun was designed after all. Also, this game reminds me of a super low budget ripoff of the Delta Force games. We are dealing with Tamsoft though, so maybe it is. Zushio fucked around with this message at 07:39 on Jun 24, 2020 |
# ? Jun 24, 2020 07:36 |
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Zushio posted:As somewhat of a gun nerd the naming in this game is driving me nuts.
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# ? Jun 24, 2020 07:42 |
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So I did. Again, super hard to tell if its a translation flub or 100% on purpose. Unrelated, but I recall FROM's Dark Tower Abyss on PS2. It also had some questionable depictions of weapons. If I recall correctly, your first gun is a super dinky 1911 chambered in weak baby .45ACP. The best hand gun you can find is the mighty Nambu Type-14 chambered in unstoppable 8mm. Edit: I swear if I see one more Tec-9 firing full auto... Zushio fucked around with this message at 08:29 on Jun 24, 2020 |
# ? Jun 24, 2020 08:15 |
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Like a lot of military-styled games, half the text was already in English so they just did the bare minimum Though, they did edit MAG(weapon type) into (weapon type) Clip
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# ? Jun 24, 2020 10:02 |
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Polsy posted:Though, they did edit MAG(weapon type) into (weapon type) Clip ...of course they did.
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# ? Jun 24, 2020 14:22 |
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Polsy posted:Though, they did edit MAG(weapon type) into (weapon type) Clip Okay, I've never quite gotten it down, what is the difference between a magazine and a clip?
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# ? Jun 26, 2020 02:30 |
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A clip is a small bit of metal that you rack ammo onto, a magazine is a container for ammo that feeds it into the firing chamber. A clip loads ammo into a magazine. If you're loading a gun with a clip, it's because it has an internal magazine. https://writingexplained.org/clip-vs-magazine-difference
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# ? Jun 26, 2020 02:32 |
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To put it into more visual terms, you put a magazine in an M16, but you put a clip in an M1 Garand.
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# ? Jun 26, 2020 05:02 |
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Man, what even is this game. There is just nothing here.
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# ? Jun 26, 2020 06:03 |
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Kibayasu posted:Man, what even is this game. There is just nothing here. From what I understand, that's just how the Simple series works.
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# ? Jun 26, 2020 13:18 |
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There is a game here, but we're not exactly sure what.
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# ? Jun 26, 2020 13:35 |
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Dabir posted:A clip is a small bit of metal that you rack ammo onto, a magazine is a container for ammo that feeds it into the firing chamber. A clip loads ammo into a magazine. If you're loading a gun with a clip, it's because it has an internal magazine. OddHaberdasher posted:To put it into more visual terms, you put a magazine in an M16, but you put a clip in an M1 Garand. Wonderful! I'm not sure I ever saw it put quite that simply, thank you!
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# ? Jun 26, 2020 16:02 |
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There's a party in the jungle and everyone's invited!
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# ? Jun 30, 2020 16:20 |
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The heavy weapons must weigh a ton and you have so much spare room without having any.
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# ? Jul 1, 2020 02:26 |
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Now I really want to know what Hero Points are. They don't seem to be experience, that appears with a normal name, so what a Hero Point is is very unclear.
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# ? Jul 1, 2020 03:36 |
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Obviously if you earn enough Hero Points, you get to be a real hero. Communicating this to the player is important so that they can, uh, feel like a hero. So do you...?
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# ? Jul 1, 2020 04:30 |
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Between that and two of the men suggesting there's some kind of powerful sword guy out there I have to wonder if something got cut from that mission at the last minute. Not sure how your hero points would tie into a possible boss fight either way, though.
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# ? Jul 1, 2020 22:27 |
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I'm still just so confused. Even terrible, terrible games first try to be something and then fail horribly.
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# ? Jul 2, 2020 04:18 |
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But that whole trying thing requires too much effort. Maybe they just intentionally skipped straight to the failing miserably, figuring it was inevitable so they might as well cut out the middleman.
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# ? Jul 2, 2020 11:11 |
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Tanks! We blow them up!
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# ? Jul 6, 2020 19:08 |
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Honestly I expected the tanks to be more threatening but instead they're pretty much only memorable for having more than 1 HP, aren't they?
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# ? Jul 6, 2020 20:36 |
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SelenicMartian posted:Tanks! We blow them up! You're the most master sergeantist master sergeant there ever was.
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# ? Jul 6, 2020 20:57 |
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I have suspicions that taking more points in shooting would make the machine guns perform better, but I also realize that this game isn't the place to expect logic or sensible game design.
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# ? Jul 6, 2020 21:31 |
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Now I know what this game is reminding me of - though its more accurate to say they are imitating games like Covert Command - those hundreds or thousands of free to play "shooting" games on phones. They all use the same few pre-built asset environments and either put you in a single spot or move you through a path automatically on a rail. They even all have overly ambitious titles. The only difference is that you control the movement and the limiting factor are your supplies instead of time-gated "energy."
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# ? Jul 7, 2020 03:19 |
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I think you are now higher ranked than the drill sergeant who named you. Why not shame him?
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# ? Jul 7, 2020 03:27 |
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Scalding Coffee posted:I think you are now higher ranked than the drill sergeant who named you. Why not shame him? Panty Waste Hawk is actually quite proud of his new name so he won't shame the brilliant man that created it.
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# ? Jul 7, 2020 03:36 |
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Guess what doesn't appear in a mission titled Tiger From Hell. ... Correct! Any of those things.
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# ? Jul 9, 2020 17:47 |
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Every time the 'sir yes sir!' sound clip plays I keep thinking of the first scene in Hunt Down the Freeman where you're in a bootcamp, and like here a drill sergeant comes in to berate the privates (all of whom have their eyes pointing in random directions, it's hideous) and at some point they all yell 'sir yes sir!' except it's the same clip played a billion times and it kills your ears. This is very unfair to this game, as much as you wouldn't believe it unless you've seen HDtF yourself.
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# ? Jul 9, 2020 18:31 |
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That tank mission did not look fair or fun.
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# ? Jul 9, 2020 20:06 |
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I think that city level was supposed to be snowy. Out of curiosity if you were to, say, completely gently caress up and whiff a bunch of grenades and bazooka rounds on a destroy tank mission would your only choice be to go back to other missions and play them until you found more? Assuming the end mission rewards are 1 time only that is.
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# ? Jul 9, 2020 21:13 |
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Zanzibar Ham posted:Every time the 'sir yes sir!' sound clip plays I keep thinking of the first scene in Hunt Down the Freeman where you're in a bootcamp, and like here a drill sergeant comes in to berate the privates (all of whom have their eyes pointing in random directions, it's hideous) and at some point they all yell 'sir yes sir!' except it's the same clip played a billion times and it kills your ears. I'm not sure I've ever heard of that. Is it some sort of Half Life mod?
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# ? Jul 9, 2020 22:23 |
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azren posted:I'm not sure I've ever heard of that. Is it some sort of Half Life mod? It's a lovely broken Half-Life mod sold as a game. At one point a Combine soldier attacks you with a big red ERROR because they forgot to switch that one gun's model when they quickly got rid of the official HL models and replaced them with ones they bought from 3rd parties.
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# ? Jul 9, 2020 22:38 |
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# ? May 4, 2024 22:13 |
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Blaze Dragon posted:That tank mission did not look fair or fun.
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# ? Jul 9, 2020 23:49 |