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Gothsheep posted:Our Butterfingers will literally be a lump of butter in the shape of a finger, thus we can call them 'The REAL Butterfingers'. This is a level of copyright infringement I can get down with.
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Oct 5, 2020 23:32
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Gothsheep posted:Our Butterfingers will literally be a lump of butter in the shape of a finger, thus we can call them 'The REAL Butterfingers'. Dip your Butterfingers in Uncle Urnie's Plasma (pure corn syrup)
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Oct 5, 2020 23:33
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Gothsheep posted:Our Butterfingers will literally be a lump of butter in the shape of a finger, thus we can call them 'The REAL Butterfingers'. Worked for the Ghostbusters (because Filmation beat them to the punch).
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Oct 5, 2020 23:36
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Everyone earnestly suggesting candy ideas seems to be getting way too involved in what I'm assuming will turn out to be Bacter's cover story for a bootlegging operation
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Oct 6, 2020 00:24
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Crane Fist posted:Everyone earnestly suggesting candy ideas seems to be getting way too involved in what I'm assuming will turn out to be Bacter's cover story for a bootlegging operation Hm What drug is the easiest to convert into and from a common grocery item, ideally candy related? Like maybe make nutmeg sniffing candy?
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Oct 6, 2020 00:25
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We're going to get two months of silence and then a very confused post from Bacter who was assuming everyone understood that 'candy factory' was code for 'meth lab'
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Oct 6, 2020 00:36
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steinrokkan posted:Hm Alcohol? Hell, candy drops with an alcoholic center might actually be a good candy idea.
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Oct 6, 2020 00:39
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TooMuchAbstraction posted:Alcohol? Hell, candy drops with an alcoholic center might actually be a good candy idea. This is already a thing that exists. Also, it's obviously very expensive. On the other hand, if we replaced "chocolate" with "cheapass hard candy" and "licensed liquors from respected brands" with "toilet moonshine we made in the back of our veterinary clinic/candy factory out of pure cane sugar and antifreeze", we might be onto something.
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Oct 6, 2020 01:12
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You can't compete with the bigalcohol producers. Just replace the alcohol with lottery tickets- Also we are running a candy lottery now.
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Oct 6, 2020 01:18
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Hold on, I just found a short video tutorial series that's all about this kind of small-time business operation. I think we could all learn a lot from these.
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Oct 6, 2020 01:25
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EclecticTastes posted:On the other hand, if we replaced "chocolate" with "cheapass hard candy" and "licensed liquors from respected brands" with "toilet moonshine we made in the back of our veterinary clinic/candy factory out of pure cane sugar and antifreeze", we might be onto something. 
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Oct 6, 2020 01:50
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ask people to send in their Jelly Bellys so that we can infuse them with our own CBD and ship them back
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Oct 6, 2020 01:52
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limeicebreakers posted:ask people to send in their Jelly Bellys so that we can infuse them with our own CBD and ship them back OR Hear me out. They ship us their Jelly Bellys, we hollow them out and fill them with cocaine, then we ship 'em back.
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Oct 6, 2020 02:13
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EclecticTastes posted:OR Why limit ourselves to 1 drug? If they supply the beans and the drugs we can put whatever drugs in whatever beans they want!!
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Oct 6, 2020 03:16
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If Candy factory speakeasy is what we're going for, we shouldn't neglect gambling. Let's make candy casino chips. "Feed the addiction!"
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Oct 6, 2020 03:36
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ShallNoiseUpon posted:Why limit ourselves to 1 drug? If they supply the beans and the drugs we can put whatever drugs in whatever beans they want!! So what, we ship out like one of those variety jars with 50 flavors but each flavor has a different drug in it?
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Oct 6, 2020 03:40
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Arzaac posted:So what, we ship out like one of those variety jars with 50 flavors but each flavor has a different drug in it? Promote this man!
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Oct 6, 2020 03:54
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EclecticTastes posted:
steinrokkan posted:You can't compete with the bigalcohol producers. Just replace the alcohol with lottery tickets- Also we are running a candy lottery now. ShallNoiseUpon posted:Why limit ourselves to 1 drug? If they supply the beans and the drugs we can put whatever drugs in whatever beans they want!! It begins
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Oct 6, 2020 05:00
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Arzaac posted:So what, we ship out like one of those variety jars with 50 flavors but each flavor has a different drug in it? Or we combine this with our candy gacha idea from earlier. You buy one candy with an unknown drug in the centre. Did you get MDMA? Acid? That sweet sweet mama H? There's only one way to find out! (Obviously the strongest drugs will have the highest rarity)
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Oct 6, 2020 06:34
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Rarity posted:Obviously the strongest drugs will have the "highest" Rarity  You don't say...
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Oct 6, 2020 07:40
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Rarity posted:Or we combine this with our candy gacha idea from earlier. You buy one candy with an unknown drug in the centre. Did you get MDMA? Acid? That sweet sweet mama H? There's only one way to find out! (Obviously the strongest drugs will have the highest rarity) One little change, make heroin the most common result for the first few months of production, then immediately make it the rarest. Ought to drive up sales in a big way.
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Oct 6, 2020 07:52
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EclecticTastes posted:One little change, make heroin the most common result for the first few months of production, then immediately make it the rarest. Ought to drive up sales in a big way. I like the cut of your gib
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Oct 6, 2020 08:57
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on the subject of illicit candy substances: if anyone in this thread is a cop they have to say so
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Oct 6, 2020 09:06
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Rarity posted:I like the cut of your gib Come with me And you'll be In a world of pure deregulation Where the market is free To flaunt safety regulations All those rules are for fools We can't let them hold back our creations What we'll make will not brook hesitation If you wanna score hella cash Simply grift some chumps and take it Even if it's poison, make it Need to snow the cops? Learn how to fake it There is no biz I know That doesn't need some deregulation Once it's there, we'll be free, to brew up our drug candy (repeat last two stanzas)
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Oct 6, 2020 09:42
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Continuing the theme of drugs in candy: Anticistamines, candy with either estrogen or testosterone in them. They'll be a big hit with the trans markets, trust me.
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Oct 6, 2020 14:13
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Pyroi posted:Continuing the theme of drugs in candy: Anticistamines, candy with either estrogen or testosterone in them. They'll be a big hit with the trans markets, trust me. We can finally start putting hormones in the water like the alt-right says we do!
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Oct 6, 2020 14:18
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Insulin-laced candy, the perfect balance for diabetics!
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Oct 6, 2020 16:47
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Pyroi posted:Continuing the theme of drugs in candy: Anticistamines, candy with either estrogen or testosterone in them. They'll be a big hit with the trans markets, trust me. Mystery boxes! Who knows what hormone you're taking when you eat this candy? Be your own gender reveal party!
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Oct 6, 2020 17:23
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How do we take the DLC model and apply it to candy? We need to release a candy bar with only 75% of the ingredients it's supposed to have and then sell the remaining 25% at a premium. Imagine buying a Baby Ruth and having to buy the chocolate coating DLC pack separately!
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Oct 6, 2020 17:28
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ShallNoiseUpon posted:How do we take the DLC model and apply it to candy? We need to release a candy bar with only 75% of the ingredients it's supposed to have and then sell the remaining 25% at a premium. Imagine buying a Baby Ruth and having to buy the chocolate coating DLC pack separately! Ahem Rarity posted:Candy expansion packs! We sell you the chocolate and the nougat but then you have to buy the caramel separately! This idea is my intellectual property 
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Oct 6, 2020 17:39
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Rarity posted:Ahem Sorry!
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Oct 6, 2020 17:52
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Pyroi posted:Continuing the theme of drugs in candy: Anticistamines, candy with either estrogen or testosterone in them. They'll be a big hit with the trans markets, trust me.
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Oct 6, 2020 18:18
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ShallNoiseUpon posted:Imagine buying a Baby Ruth and having to buy the chocolate coating DLC pack separately! "Baby Ruth without the chocolate" already exists, it's called Payday.
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Oct 6, 2020 19:18
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EclecticTastes posted:"Baby Ruth without the chocolate" already exists, it's called Payday. Baby Ruth has nougat, Payday is just caramel & peanuts
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Oct 6, 2020 19:58
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ShallNoiseUpon posted:Baby Ruth has nougat, Payday is just caramel & peanuts Nobody buys Baby Ruth for the nougat (then again, pretty sure most people only buy Baby Ruth because they just saw Caddyshack and are about to visit a pool). Besides, you need something that at least technically can exist on its own without the candy DLC for the plan to work, and anything with significant nougat content or raw caramel is just gonna fall apart. What I'm thinking is we sell a chambered candy bar, similar to the Sky Bar, and then release little syringes full of various fillings, and charge a premium for those.
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Oct 6, 2020 20:09
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EclecticTastes posted:Nobody buys Baby Ruth for the nougat (then again, pretty sure most people only buy Baby Ruth because they just saw Caddyshack and are about to visit a pool). Besides, you need something that at least technically can exist on its own without the candy DLC for the plan to work, and anything with significant nougat content or raw caramel is just gonna fall apart. What I'm thinking is we sell a chambered candy bar, similar to the Sky Bar, and then release little syringes full of various fillings, and charge a premium for those. And to keep the costs down we recycle syringes we find in our
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Oct 6, 2020 20:39
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Black Robe posted:And to keep the costs down we recycle syringes we find in our Now you're on the trolley! We don't even need to limit ourselves to stuff like fudge or caramel! Make it randomized, candy filling loot boxes! Maybe it contains delicious vanilla cream, maybe it's pure potassium cyanide! Who knows?
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Oct 6, 2020 21:01
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EclecticTastes posted:Now you're on the trolley! We don't even need to limit ourselves to stuff like fudge or caramel! Make it randomized, candy filling loot boxes! Maybe it contains delicious vanilla cream, maybe it's pure potassium cyanide! Who knows? So basically those every flavour beans from Harry Potter, only half the flavours are just "different type of poison"
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Oct 7, 2020 00:25
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I mean if we're that dedicated to killing our customer base, we might as well include golden tickets that make you eligible to be kidnapped for a death game. The death game will be filmed and monetized, of course.
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Oct 7, 2020 00:42
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Crane Fist posted:So basically those every flavour beans from Harry Potter, only half the flavours are just "different type of poison" Yeah, I think we're getting too into Bean-Boozled territory here. The new fad is microtransactions and monthly payments, anyways - subscribe to our zoot box program and we'll send you a questionable number of candies with questionable drugs every month!
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Oct 7, 2020 02:09
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