Dumb shit your work does: for some reason in the Diablo font.

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > Dumb shit your work does: for some reason in the Diablo font.

Hotel Kpro: Feb 24, 2011; owls don't go to school; Dinosaur Gum

TaurusTorus posted:

Oh, and also the �proper� way to install a transducer is 12 passes on each screw, using 6 different calibrated torque tools from 3 foot-pounds to 35 foot-pounds.

We don�t have that. I have an Allen wrench taken from dayshift because ours got too worn and was stripping the screws.

Depending on who calibrated those wrenches, they may not be in spec anyway. We deal with a lot of companies that claim they can calibrate or repair something and then we go digging around to find out they're full of poo poo

# ¿ Jul 8, 2023 19:50

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# ¿ May 17, 2024 15:59

Hotel Kpro: Feb 24, 2011; owls don't go to school; Dinosaur Gum

Krustic posted:

Waiting for a a potluck/pizza party thing to start. My cookies will blow everyone�s else�s baked treats out of the water since I am good as gently caress at baking. Ready to flex on these nerds.

I have three cookie recipes that I sometimes rotate through when I bring them to work and they all get devoured unbelievably fast. People just don�t know the art of baking sweets

# ¿ Jul 21, 2023 18:52

Hotel Kpro: Feb 24, 2011; owls don't go to school; Dinosaur Gum

goatface posted:

You should organise a beaver transplant.

I�m sure Post10 would be happy to move one from the culverts he unclogs

# ¿ Jul 27, 2023 18:59

Hotel Kpro: Feb 24, 2011; owls don't go to school; Dinosaur Gum

Lazyfire posted:

We just had an all-hands for Supply Chain to kick off a massive reorg that's going to be...interesting for most areas. We're about to watch people who were previously purchasing machined parts for Singapore become responsible for electronics going to Phoenix. Being in special projects keeps me from having to get moved around which is great because I haven't spent three months at a time with a single manager in the last year and could use some stability.

The funniest drat thing they did was put out an FAQ where one of the questions was "With many of us already overwhelmed will this change see an increase in headcount so we can offload some of our responsibilities?" and the response was a paragraph about how current financial climate being less than ideal for adding people and how we are hoping the reorg will make everything better without adding people. Problem is that the company announced our second quarter results yesterday and our profits were up 36% over last year. We're doing better than our 2019 numbers and have several programs/customers looking to ramp up past that in the next year. Since 2021 we've had a new compliance regime get dropped on us that effectively doubles the time it takes to create a purchase order and in a sane world we would have a fleet of new grads coming in and taking that from us and moving into purchasing roles as they opened up. Instead, we're doing a week of legwork for five minutes of processing and are then responsible for monitoring every step in the production of the parts.

Also rolling out this week is the new travel policy. It used to be that you could apply to travel to a supplier or customer the week before you left and outside of international trips just your supervisor would need to approve. The new company-wide policy requires a three week approval period and the VICE PRESIDENT of your division has final say. We're an aerospace company with customers and vendors all over the world, you could be based in Minnesota and be responsible for vendors in California that you visited every quarter shipping parts to Spain and France at places you would go to once a year. Occasionally, you would need to get on a plane with less than 24 hours notice to deal with a crisis. Yeah, go gently caress yourself if you think that's happening anytime soon. As much as we all learned to rely on Zoom and emails over the last few years sometimes you just NEED to see a vendor or a customer site to fully understand their capacity and bottlenecks. It'll be interesting to see how long this lasts. My wife is pissed because she only just got back to visiting customers and vendors this month and the company has effectively put us back into COVID travel policies, emergency situations only. All to make sure the shareholders get an extra quarter cent per quarter.

Seeing what our supply chain deals with in our aerospace company makes me glad I�m but a lowly tech in a department no one knows much about.

There�s a good chance we get acquired by someone else since our parent company got themselves in too much debt, so while that could be fun it could also be a poo poo time to be here

# ¿ Jul 28, 2023 15:21

Hotel Kpro: Feb 24, 2011; owls don't go to school; Dinosaur Gum

Methylethylaldehyde posted:

It's a complex chemical sensor, hydrometer, ph probe, and root health detector, only the finest potting material can be used for calibration.

Our standard inductors are pretty much cubes full of potting material. I guess they make the calibrations better

# ¿ Aug 4, 2023 19:09

Hotel Kpro: Feb 24, 2011; owls don't go to school; Dinosaur Gum

DrBouvenstein posted:

Well, there's the rub...I have no idea. Not this, and not my last job, which is basically the only two things I'm remotely qualified for. Actually, I wouldn't mind too much the WORK I did at my last job, just not the employer or the pay (the problem is they are the only employer in the area, really, in that line of work and I have no desire to move.)

Biomedical technician is a short step from calibration technician, which if you don�t mind the work you can probably get a job doing calibration poo poo pretty easily. The career field is everywhere if you know where to look and everyone is usually hiring. Maybe something to look into

# ¿ Aug 10, 2023 19:20

Hotel Kpro: Feb 24, 2011; owls don't go to school; Dinosaur Gum

For whatever reason we have five filing cabinets full of records of every lab standard we've calibrated for the last 30 years or so. Every calibration, every test point, an absolute ridiculous amount of useless paper because everything is housed digitally as well. I offered to go through every single record and see what standards we even still have to see if we can cut down on the amount of space this takes up. My manager insisted even if we did that everything would still have to go sit in a warehouse because we can't just get rid of these records.

Three jobs ago I ran into a similar issue where they said we had to keep a paper copy of every procedure we had, then would complain that we were running out of room with the three filing cabinets full of paper. I had been there less than a year and noticed we used maybe 15% of those procedures. After cleaning out the ones we never used because whatever they were written for wasn't in our inventory anymore we had one filing cabinet with room to spare.

The air force did it right though. We had two rotating bookcases full of maintenance procedures and one day they said everything needed to go, so two guys spent a week throwing everything into a burn barrel.

# ¿ Aug 13, 2023 21:47

Hotel Kpro: Feb 24, 2011; owls don't go to school; Dinosaur Gum

SiKboy posted:

I'd personally bet heavily on Italy winning the 2006 world cup, but sure, trade school is good too if we have enough time machine for two things.

I�d bet the house on Leicester City winning in 2015/16 then use that money and put it all on UMBC over Virginia. At that point I could probably just buy someone else�s company and proceed to run it into the ground because I know nothing about running a business

# ¿ Aug 14, 2023 19:02

Hotel Kpro: Feb 24, 2011; owls don't go to school; Dinosaur Gum

When I showed up at my work about a year ago I found out we had multiple monitors that were VGA only. I also found three mice with trackballs. I made sure those all got replaced but we still have a few DP to DVI ones floating around

# ¿ Aug 21, 2023 19:28

Hotel Kpro: Feb 24, 2011; owls don't go to school; Dinosaur Gum

BiggerBoat posted:

Friday is Hawaiian Shirt Da...so...yeah...if you want to...go ahead and feel free to wear a Hawaiian Shirt, mmm=kay?

Three jobs ago someone tried to get us all to wear Hawaiian shirts, not really as a manager but a coworker who thought Hawaiian shirt Friday was cool. I told him I really didn�t like Hawaiian shirts, but I did have a couple nautical themed shirts so I�d wear those instead. Now I always wear nautical themed shirts on Friday and my coworkers think something is terribly wrong if I don�t

# ¿ Aug 24, 2023 13:42

Hotel Kpro: Feb 24, 2011; owls don't go to school; Dinosaur Gum

We had a fan go bad on a power supply, found a replacement for $15. The work center insisted it get sent to the manufacturer and they�re charging us close to $2500 to replace the entire fan assembly. I know it�s small potatoes but c�mon

# ¿ Aug 25, 2023 15:12

Hotel Kpro: Feb 24, 2011; owls don't go to school; Dinosaur Gum

Lazyfire posted:

Just got off my weekly org meeting. One of the people on another team had her docking station fail and when she called the IT people for a new one she was told management had a policy of no replacements and no upgrades for failed hardware. We're already on heavy travel restrictions and cutting down on inventory to save a couple million at a company that profited $40 million last year. This is making me wonder if we are either in the process of getting sold or if there's a corporate level cashflow problem we're trying to solve by being miserly with $200 Dell hardware. Boss' boss said that he believes that we're trying to get to a 20% profit per unit sold by 2025 and are "only" at 14.5% now. We're an Aerospace company, almost everything we sell for new production is done at a loss (outside of one platform because the customer blindly signed a contract), so 14.5% is pretty good already. 20% is insane. I was telling my wife about this and realized this is the kind of irrational frugality I saw when I worked for Alstom before they got bought by GE. I don't think we're getting spun off or sold, but this one of those "oh gently caress" things you see as a sign of trouble once you've experienced it before. Looking forward to seeing who gets laid off in the next six months.

Aerospace is a healthy industry so uhhh yeah I�d say your company is probably in a lot of trouble if $200 is going to break the bank. The aerospace company I work for is getting acquired but it�s business as usual so I dunno come work for us

# ¿ Sep 2, 2023 01:41

Hotel Kpro: Feb 24, 2011; owls don't go to school; Dinosaur Gum

deep dish peat moss posted:

I am

My best guess is that the job market just fuckin' sucks in my city, the cost of living here has skyrocketed since the start of the pandemic (even a studio apartment here costs about $15k/year more than it used to) but none of the employers have caught up. So all these remote positions avoid people from here because we want too much money compared to someone in Wyoming or whatever, and everyone hiring local seems to be just kind of waiting for CoL to drop before actually hiring anyone.

I'd gladly relocate for a job at this point but I can't afford it and no one offers relocation assistance anymore lmao

Start applying for calibration jobs, it�s a cake career field and it�s relatively easy to get into

# ¿ Sep 4, 2023 20:08

Hotel Kpro: Feb 24, 2011; owls don't go to school; Dinosaur Gum

Bored posted:

Also, thanks for this. How do I turn my playing with machinery, ability to understand how machinery works (art projects and basic tool repair) with reference material, and previous veterinary lab work into working to put on a resume so that they won�t just throw my application in the trash? Is their a reference site for example resumes for people with a little lab experience but no degrees that wants to get into calibration?

I really, really suck at selling myself. I�ve decided to start pretending I�m helping someone else with a job search, cause I would likely spend tons of time on that instead of just getting depressed and frustrated like I do for myself.

And yeah, I still plan on eventually restarting school, but I currently have no money and bills to pay.

Do you know what a torque wrench, multimeter, or oscilloscope is? If you said yes to any of those you�re halfway in the door. If you mention the words guardbanding and uncertainties you�ll impress a hiring manager. If you throw in even the tiniest bit of theory about stuff like ohm�s law or pv = nrt you�ll stand out easily. Seriously the bar is super low for this career field. There are two people who get hired, people who did this in the military and random people off the street. If you know more than the next guy you�ll get a job. And once you�re in you�ll never be out of a job, like ever

# ¿ Sep 5, 2023 18:49

Hotel Kpro: Feb 24, 2011; owls don't go to school; Dinosaur Gum

I looked up one of my previous employers on Glassdoor and they are rated way too high. Maybe they targeted our lab and only our lab to gently caress us over years back.

Apparently I could work for them again, all I�d have to is move to Guam for $44 an hour and hope they reimburse the moving costs

# ¿ Sep 13, 2023 13:53

Hotel Kpro: Feb 24, 2011; owls don't go to school; Dinosaur Gum

TehRedWheelbarrow posted:

you probably did, ive seen app notes in azure/aws/palo alto updates that was like waiiiiit.

that being said if a company knows something is busted they usually have a "known issues" addedum on software releases if they are reasonably decent to work with.

There�s a note on Keysight�s website about updating firmware for a specific multimeter that I like taking credit for. Turns out that going from version 1 to 3 bricks the multimeter, but going 1 to 2 to 3 works great. That was a fun day

# ¿ Sep 29, 2023 22:32

Hotel Kpro: Feb 24, 2011; owls don't go to school; Dinosaur Gum

Two weeks ago: Hey Hotel Kpro here's 128 power supplies that need new Not Calibrated stickers on them

Last week: We need 4 of them calibrated

Today: We need 12 more calibrated

Also today: You need to help out other sections because they have too much work

Also last week during some meeting that I missed: Everyone needs to work harder, the backlog keeps going up!

Also also today: You had more production than anyone else, but we need you to do more

# ¿ Oct 4, 2023 04:10

Hotel Kpro: Feb 24, 2011; owls don't go to school; Dinosaur Gum

Scientastic posted:

Driving to work is not work, if you work from home, your firm should pay for Internet and phone, but obviously not your mortgage. If a company expects you to be accessing work things in your phone, they should give you a phone.

I dunno, I may have landed a job where they'll pay me to drive to work when I need to go somewhere. Supposedly I'll hear back tomorrow

# ¿ Oct 8, 2023 15:25

Hotel Kpro: Feb 24, 2011; owls don't go to school; Dinosaur Gum

A few years back we had a guy in the veterans sub forum lie about serving which isn�t too crazy but he kept the charade up for a few years I think, he was even posting how dfas hosed up his pay which if you�ve ever been in you�d know that�s super common. It was kinda ridiculous how much he played into the role

# ¿ Oct 12, 2023 19:23

Hotel Kpro: Feb 24, 2011; owls don't go to school; Dinosaur Gum

Be like that one story where the goon is forgotten and puts himself in charge of safety

# ¿ Nov 1, 2023 19:54

Hotel Kpro: Feb 24, 2011; owls don't go to school; Dinosaur Gum

Mulaney Power Move posted:

If someone said I wasn't a team player for not going for drinks I'd go straight to HR.

I�d go straight to the bar, I�ll show them a team player! I�ll drink all day!!

# ¿ Dec 4, 2023 19:52

Hotel Kpro: Feb 24, 2011; owls don't go to school; Dinosaur Gum

TaurusTorus posted:

Dang, my work had a smash bros tournament while I was out of town.

I�ve never worked anywhere cool enough that anything like that went down

# ¿ Dec 8, 2023 03:00

Hotel Kpro: Feb 24, 2011; owls don't go to school; Dinosaur Gum

Apparently before I got to my current job there was a merger in the 90s. It didn't work and recently they started the process to de-merge. I have two email addresses with both domains and half the people I need to talk to are in one system and half in the other. It's dumb.

# ¿ Dec 23, 2023 19:24

Hotel Kpro: Feb 24, 2011; owls don't go to school; Dinosaur Gum

DeeplyConcerned posted:

Congratulations on your military achievements. Here is your giant penis.

A few years back I did the goons in platoons (now internet VFW) secret Santa and I had a custom wooden plaque made with a giant penis on it and the words �I survived the military�. I put that into the graffiti dickbook we made for the forum as well

# ¿ Jan 2, 2024 19:29

Hotel Kpro: Feb 24, 2011; owls don't go to school; Dinosaur Gum

We have an oasis cart but there�s no booze to be found, just snacks and candy

# ¿ Jan 4, 2024 04:54

Hotel Kpro: Feb 24, 2011; owls don't go to school; Dinosaur Gum

withoutclass posted:

Dreaming of a stout that isn't Birthday Cake Peanut Butter Caramel Barrel Aged Stout with 15% ABV

It�s always Bourbon barrel aged too

# ¿ Jan 6, 2024 02:19

Hotel Kpro: Feb 24, 2011; owls don't go to school; Dinosaur Gum

Azuth0667 posted:

Friday meetings should be felony offenses.

I have some training meeting today that�s supposed to go from 1-3pm. But if they give us early release I�m out at 1:30, gently caress hanging out late on a Friday

# ¿ Jan 12, 2024 15:24

Hotel Kpro: Feb 24, 2011; owls don't go to school; Dinosaur Gum

Pretty sure I've only had one job where our headcount increased from when I started to when I left. Every other time it just went down and stayed down

# ¿ Jan 24, 2024 04:04

Hotel Kpro: Feb 24, 2011; owls don't go to school; Dinosaur Gum

Use the heat from the fire to power a balloon and float away to wherever the wind takes you

# ¿ Jan 28, 2024 19:52

Hotel Kpro: Feb 24, 2011; owls don't go to school; Dinosaur Gum

teen witch posted:

I thought this was only me, I didn�t even make the OS 7-9 connection. People get real weirded out when they see my screen and I never understood why I prefer the window chaos.

I still call it TextEdit SimpleText sometimes.

I know I get bothered when I can�t see other windows. Nothing is minimized and everything is all over the place but dammit it works for me

# ¿ Feb 23, 2024 13:41

Hotel Kpro: Feb 24, 2011; owls don't go to school; Dinosaur Gum

deep dish peat moss posted:

The job I have now is the first job I've ever had like this and it weirds me out. There's almost nothing for me to do most of the time and they really don't care that I just sit around shitposting on the internet or whatever with the rest of my time. I'm not measured on literally anything beyond "are you available when we need you?". I have ~30-45 minutes of tasks to do in the morning and then the rest of the day I pretty much just answer the phone 3 or 4 times, and none of those calls have ever lasted more than 2 minutes because it's literally just someone saying "Hey I need you to figure out schedules for [xyz] because [so and so] called out." or something, and I say "okay I'll do that" then spend a minute doing it. And the best part is it's a not-for-profit organization that doesn't outsource anything except IT so I'll probably never get cut.

It's truly the most blessed job I've ever had but I also worry constantly that I'm supposed to be doing more because every job I've ever had had been "always find something to be doing and continue meeting ever-expanding KPIs", lmao. But I'm also filling a position that they couldn't operate without so ????. I'm making enough money to live alone and pay out of pocket for school (which they're reimbursing 100% for me anyway!). I don't want things to ever change. Hell, I don't even want to graduate and move on to something else at this point.

I�m in the exact same position, I�ve been here three months and have had a few days of being busy but mostly I just work on school stuff. All my previous jobs I�ve been constantly busy and had to justify all the work I was doing with closed tickets or items out the door.

The real dumb part is that despite the lack of work they decided to hire not one but two people to help me. I was explaining to the other guy who started last week that I hardly do anything. I guess the other guy starts next week and I can have the same conversation with them. I�ve got two classes left for school and while I�m tempted to ride this gravy train for a while the pay ceiling is lower than if I tried getting a different job after getting the degree

# ¿ Feb 27, 2024 04:20

Hotel Kpro: Feb 24, 2011; owls don't go to school; Dinosaur Gum

Pyrtanis posted:

I really want to just find a hospital job again and do what I know I'm good at, even if it's less money

What like biomed? Seems pretty chill from what I see. Then you can pick up IT stuff and be the IT guy for all the biomed devices

# ¿ Apr 13, 2024 14:58

Hotel Kpro: Feb 24, 2011; owls don't go to school; Dinosaur Gum

I�ve had very little work to do since I started this job in November. Super close to being done with my degree and they said I�ll get promoted when it�s done. Feels weird being rewarded for not doing very much real work but I�ll take it. Maybe they�ll expect more from me? Who knows

# ¿ Apr 19, 2024 16:43

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# ¿ May 17, 2024 15:59

Hotel Kpro: Feb 24, 2011; owls don't go to school; Dinosaur Gum

tactlessbastard posted:

The safety team and the engineering team are now actively at odds to the point the engineers are essentially on strike

Safety rolled out a really robust working from heights protocol with no warning and in it contained the language that all attachment points for fall protection must tested for a 5000lb load.

Engineering points out that none of our attachment points meet this standard (this place was built in 1984)

Safety says all work at heights must stop until engineering tests all attachment points (we're on a 20 acre complex, this would take...months)

Meanwhile the AC in the engineering office is out and they can't get the HVAC fixed because the unit is on the roof within 6 feet of the edge and safety declared it to be impossible to safely repair

I suspect the safety office is going to get their power cut

I worked for an aerospace company that had thousands of pieces of lifting hardware; shackles, turnbuckles, straps, hoist rings, swivel rings, and hooks. For some ungodly reason years ago they decided calibration techs (I was one of them when I worked there, just not years ago) had to do the annual inspection on all of them to make sure they weren't cracked or damaged. I would say whoever pawned that off on us was a genius, but I think it was actually some dipshit previous manager of our department who decided we didn't have enough work. Fast forward a few years and the company now has over 20000 items to calibrate and those drat pieces of lifting hardware cost us about two people doing it full time when we needed two people doing actual calibratable items.

At some point they also decided everything needed a proof load test, and we had hundreds of items that just didn't have anything, so here we are sending a couple hundred items out to a vendor to get them proof loaded when we'd been using some of them for 25+ years. I get the logic behind that decision, but why wasn't that a requirement from the beginning?

All in all, gently caress lifting hardware. I was so salty when we had to do them. Great for numbers but also a huge waste of our time

# ¿ May 9, 2024 22:02

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > Dumb shit your work does: for some reason in the Diablo font.