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BrigadierSensible
Feb 16, 2012

I've got a pocket full of cheese🧀, and a garden full of trees🌴.

bebaloorpabopalo posted:

just in case you were thinking that Jim Cornette could not possibly make himself look bad while tearing into Joey Ryan

he confuses "women are now more comfortable speaking up about these things" with "these things never happened before", goes on about how Back In The Day the Consenting Adult Female Fans were lining up to gently caress The Boys so none of them ever did anything improper and they especially never had relations with underage girls, and today's wrestlers have to be sex pests because they're Girly Pussies who wrestle bad so no women want to gently caress them

Ahh, so it's the girls fault that they are getting raped/sexually harrassed. Because if they did like they were supposed to and didn't have agency of their own and instead existed as mere sexual objects, then they would be loving the wrestlers for free. And nobody would get in trouble.

This is a clever and good take.


I am not mocking the poster, I am mocking Jim Cornette for his patronizing and horrifically sexist views.

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BrigadierSensible
Feb 16, 2012

I've got a pocket full of cheese🧀, and a garden full of trees🌴.

Punch McLightning posted:


As a reminder, the bad behavior part of his swinging wasn’t that it was their thing, it’s that he asked trainees and developmental workers who he had to a of power over to engage with them sexually.

Agree. I don't like the use of "cuck" as an insult because of this. If you like to watch your wife gently caress other people, and all involved have informed consent, then YAY to everybody there. It's all cool.

But Mr. and Mrs. Cornette were using their position of authority over young wrestlers, (Cornette was their boss), to force them into the Cornette's sex life with the implied threat of getting sacked/blackballed from their livelihood/a business they loved. (The threat may even have been explicit, I don't remember.)

This is not cool. Nor technically, is it informed, and enthusiastic consent.

BrigadierSensible
Feb 16, 2012

I've got a pocket full of cheese🧀, and a garden full of trees🌴.

I liked Charlie Haas when he was in WWE.

I liked his teaming with Shelton and Angle. I even liked the short run he had where he would mimic a different famous wrestler each week in a squash match.

I feel bad now.

BrigadierSensible
Feb 16, 2012

I've got a pocket full of cheese🧀, and a garden full of trees🌴.

I am not a historian of the old territory days, so forgive the ignorance of this question. Also, sorry if this is not the place to ask it.

But were there many comedic wrestlers back in the territory days? Surely to keep the crowd happy and/or keep their energy levels high, you would have a comedy match somewhere in the midcard. Or a comedic heel character would be a good way to give your local babyface a cheap crowd pleasing win in a town where the audience skewed younger.

Surely the kind of cowardly manager that Cornette himself played fills that role, and when this character gets his commupance, it is usually played for laughs, (see Heenan being forced to wear a weasel costume etc.). So is he saying that he only likes "comedy" when what is making the crowd laugh is a big tough wrestler threatening to beat up a cowardly weakling of a non-wrestler?

BrigadierSensible
Feb 16, 2012

I've got a pocket full of cheese🧀, and a garden full of trees🌴.

Why does he think Asuka is pregnant?

Is this a weird stereotype I don't get? A stupid inside joke that Cornette has been making? An insult, "she wrestles bad enough for two", kind of deal?

BrigadierSensible
Feb 16, 2012

I've got a pocket full of cheese🧀, and a garden full of trees🌴.

Mulaney Power Move posted:

his excuse for that not being the same as wrestling a 9 year old is convoluted. something like they presented it as a wrestoer in a costume rather than he's wrestling an actual ninja turtle and the point was to humilate him.

If I remember rightly, Kenny Omega vs Haruka was presented as the mean nasty cocky Foreigner heel about to beat up a 9 year old girl because thats a dastardly thing a heel would do. And he said he would win within a time limit coz thats a thing a cocky heel would do.

The plucky babyface little girl shows some "fighting spirit"(tm) and hits a few moves, but still gets the poo poo kicked out of her, (I think Kenny hits a Shining Wizard on her), and is about to truly gently caress her up with his finisher, but because of his cockiness/her fighting spirit, runs out of time. Therefore loses ON A TECHNICALITY. He slinks away as the defeated humiliated heel, she basks in the cheers of a happy crowd. And all is right with the world.

This is old school wrestling 101. Everyone gets over, the crowd is happy, and she didn't "real life" win, and Kenny is shown to be both bigger, tougher, a better wrestler than her, but also a horrible heel for being prepared to do his move on a defenceless little girl.

So Cornettes objection to it boils down to "It's silly and unbelievable". Which is bullshit. Because from Hulk Hogan to Mil Mascaras to loving Harley Race, all wrestling is silly and unbelievable.

Personally, I love the Kenny vs Haruka match. For all the pro wrestling 101 story poo poo I just said, but also for the way that Kenny and the ref work so sweetly and gently with a little girl living her dream, and how the crowd immediately buy in and support her and carry her through it.

Cornette can get hosed though.

BrigadierSensible
Feb 16, 2012

I've got a pocket full of cheese🧀, and a garden full of trees🌴.

davidbix posted:

But...he also had the "geez, I should talk about things I enjoy instead" realization a year or so after that. At least for a little while, seemingly until he realized how lucrative he could make it, he really did not want to be the rant guy.

A jim Cornette Podcast where he did only talk about things he liked, and reminisced about the "olden days" and which wrestlers he liked, and the cool stuff they did in ring and out of ring, and anecdotes about the backstage machinations of the various different promotions he has worked for over the last few decades might actually be interesting and/or fun.

Cornette has a remarkable memory for dates and numbers etc. and has been around for a long time so he knows a lot of stories, and probably even quite a few fun ones about cool things he likes.

The problem would be is that instead of it being "old man tells wrestling stories from his past" it would inevitably devolve into Jim angrily yelling about ... something or other, using slurs and then yelling some more.

Which is not cool or fum.

BrigadierSensible
Feb 16, 2012

I've got a pocket full of cheese🧀, and a garden full of trees🌴.

Low Desert Punk posted:

some of the kayfabecommentaries shoots with Jim were pretty much like this, like the ones specifically focusing on pre-90's wrestling. there was a really good one with Lance Storm where they just tell stories about Stampede and western Canada wrestling for like two hours

unfortunately even what good content Cornette has is tainted by decades of him being an unlikable toxic dipshit. that's the problem, he can't really go back at this point

Has Lance Storm disowned Cornette yet? Or at least distanced himself from him?

Coz I like Lance Storm, and think he has a good wrestling brain. Even if he does get it wrong a couple of times, (Libraries etc.) And last I heard Lance was a big fan of Cornette and Cornettes booking back in the olden days.

So I just hope Mr. Storm hasnt been Milkshake Duck-ed by association.

BrigadierSensible
Feb 16, 2012

I've got a pocket full of cheese🧀, and a garden full of trees🌴.

rotinaj posted:

Is it because he’s a racist, sexist, bigoted, antiquated piece of poo poo who hasn’t created anything in at least ten years, and hasn’t created anything good in like 25?

No. It's because women can't wrestle, and are better as valets/managers.

Clearly you are the sexist/racist/homophobe for thinking otherwise. (Add in some swearing and nonsense nicknames.)

BrigadierSensible
Feb 16, 2012

I've got a pocket full of cheese🧀, and a garden full of trees🌴.

So whilst I can assume what Cornette thinks of Japanese and/or Mexican wrestling, (Boo! It's foreign, and there are too many flips.), does he have an opinion on the UK scene?

Favourite/hated wrestlers? Memories/cool stories of when he used to go on foreign tours to there?

BrigadierSensible
Feb 16, 2012

I've got a pocket full of cheese🧀, and a garden full of trees🌴.

The idea of "exposing" the business always seemed absurd to me.

Because when I learned that wrestling was 'fake' as a little kid, I was even more in awe of the big muscly athletes. Because it was cool that they could do stuff that looked so violent, yet not hurt each other.

Also little softy me liked the idea that they were actually friends, (and again the fact that friends were doing these moves to each other made the whole thing cooler.)

BrigadierSensible
Feb 16, 2012

I've got a pocket full of cheese🧀, and a garden full of trees🌴.

Whilst we know what Jim Cornette thinks about the in-ring and on TV stuff, (too many asians, not enough like it was in the 80s in half empty bingo halls), what are his thoughts on the recent wave of WWE sackings?

BrigadierSensible
Feb 16, 2012

I've got a pocket full of cheese🧀, and a garden full of trees🌴.

It's also part of a bigger thing where bigots diminish Transphobia/Racism/Sexism/Homophobia et al as "hurting someones feelings."

A way of blaming the victim for getting upset, and being able to say "what I did wasn't that bad."

BrigadierSensible
Feb 16, 2012

I've got a pocket full of cheese🧀, and a garden full of trees🌴.

davidbix posted:

Not quite: In a lot of territories, particularly the one (Memphis) where Jim broke in, having regular sex with fans was considered good for business because it would help them draw female fans and drawing female fans led to drawing more young male fans. It wasn't a kayfabe violation thing, but it was still weird and dumb.

Yeah. As I remember it Jericho writes in his book that Cornette was mad at them both for not loving any of the hillbilly fans. Jericho said "Well, Lance is married and I have standards."

BrigadierSensible
Feb 16, 2012

I've got a pocket full of cheese🧀, and a garden full of trees🌴.

BGrifter posted:

It warms my heart to know Danhausen has more than twice the Patreon subscribers of Cornette.



Ego getting close!

Edit: lol Russo currently has 532 and Cornette is down to 474.

I am quoting this post just to say that I like Ethan Page and think he is both personable and handsome.

Also a fine performer. I would love for him to get a championship, but he is most likely better served in the midcard.

BrigadierSensible
Feb 16, 2012

I've got a pocket full of cheese🧀, and a garden full of trees🌴.

Forgive my ignorance:

What are the Aubrey conspiracies?

That she is secretly a blood drinking satanic lizard-person from space like the Queen of England?

BrigadierSensible
Feb 16, 2012

I've got a pocket full of cheese🧀, and a garden full of trees🌴.

1glitch0 posted:

Taking Eddie's side over Disco seems uncharacteristic.

Literally nobody likes Disco Inferno.

Nobody.

BrigadierSensible
Feb 16, 2012

I've got a pocket full of cheese🧀, and a garden full of trees🌴.

The best thing Disco Inferno has done. Ever.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HDSUD0by7x0

Oil of Olay everyday!

BrigadierSensible
Feb 16, 2012

I've got a pocket full of cheese🧀, and a garden full of trees🌴.

Wrestling was never ever intended to look like a "real fight".

Back in the olden days it was intended to look like a "real athletic contest". With rules, and skills, and a victor that earned their victory by using their skills in accordance with said rules.

Then to spice it up they added your "fake" beefs and storylines. Along the lines of "I don't like you, so instead of competing against you in this contest according to the rules, I will fight you and try and hurt you." But even then it was still framed as the two combatants were doing so withing the confines of an athletic contest. Not a fight.

BrigadierSensible
Feb 16, 2012

I've got a pocket full of cheese🧀, and a garden full of trees🌴.

Mulaney Power Move posted:

can we defend his non hateful views, such as uh, ... cheeseburger towels? actually no i think he filled that with hate too i think

Is a cheeseburger towel a towel made out of cheeseburgers, or a cheeseburger incorporating a towel ... somehow?

Or perhaps the more sensible option of a towel featuring an image of a cheeseburger.

BrigadierSensible
Feb 16, 2012

I've got a pocket full of cheese🧀, and a garden full of trees🌴.

Going a ways back, wasn't Jim Cornette legitimately mad and offended at Southpaw Wrestling when they made fun of his "summoning a creature from the ocean to wrestle" gimmick?

As in it went beyond his usual "all wrestling that isnt 70s Smoky Mountain wrestling is awful" schtick. He was actually angry that some wrestlers were poking fun at poo poo he himself did.

I am still truly sad we never got to see the series 3 of Southpaw that we were promised.

BrigadierSensible
Feb 16, 2012

I've got a pocket full of cheese🧀, and a garden full of trees🌴.

What is Cornette's take on "Better than you Bay Bay"?

Is it bad because neither performer shouts enough racial slurs? Is it bad for taking a universally despised heel and turning him into a largely beloved face? Is it bad for having cool matches and cooler skits?

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BrigadierSensible
Feb 16, 2012

I've got a pocket full of cheese🧀, and a garden full of trees🌴.

Adam Cole is an adorable snugglebunny of a man, and I will hear no disparagement of him and his wholesomeness.
:(

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