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crepeface
Nov 5, 2004

r*p*f*c*

Eat This Glob posted:

i hope so. chandler blocked me on twitter when he said he was fighting to represent the "stars and bars" and i told him that was the name of the confederate flag lol

ugh! could he BE any dumber

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crepeface
Nov 5, 2004

r*p*f*c*

Ratios and Tendency posted:

Are kangaroos considered more dangerous than chimps?? This is...unsettling

they can jump an eight-foot fence from a standstill. imagine how strong their legs are, and what they have at the end of them:



you might be able to outrun a chimp with a head start, but lol at escaping a murder machine who can maintain usain bolt speeds for 2km.

quote:

chimps:
Top Speed: 25 miles per hour
Maintainable Distance: 100 meters

quote:

kangaroos:
speeds of up to 71 km/h (44 mph) can be attained over short distances, while it can sustain a speed of 40 km/h (25 mph) for nearly 2 km (1.2 mi). The faster a kangaroo hops, the less energy it consumes (up to its cruising speed).

basically imagine a EPO laden, roided out (complete with roid-rage) 8 foot barboza with knives on the end of his feet and he has an additional limb for balance.



......someone send this info to joe rogan

crepeface fucked around with this message at 06:02 on May 15, 2021

crepeface
Nov 5, 2004

r*p*f*c*

Nis posted:

being a fat schlub with no experience fighting a toddler much less anything mildly threatening, i have zero confidence i could beat any of those things with my bare hands (including the rat, the house cat, and the goose)

the goose is a complete scrub. swans are where it's at.

https://youtu.be/g_pwPhFvgNo

crepeface
Nov 5, 2004

r*p*f*c*
Yeah, not sure about that either. Maybe if he didn't get owned he'd never have the motivation to get decent striking?

crepeface
Nov 5, 2004

r*p*f*c*
https://twitter.com/rawmmanews/status/1399485304541753348?s=19

Jake Paul is where washed up mma fighters go to cash in their rep for a retirement cheque

crepeface
Nov 5, 2004

r*p*f*c*
it's called the rap game.

crepeface
Nov 5, 2004

r*p*f*c*
it somehow still would be

at this point i have to imagine he has a humilation fetish

crepeface
Nov 5, 2004

r*p*f*c*

Mekchu posted:

Just as a heads up for anyone who may misunderstand this post (I did until I remembered the scene), its actually a reference to a scene in a movie Woodley is in where his character gets their dick bitten off by a raccoon for betraying his gang leader.

Edit - I wish I had the clip readily available. Its an amazing piece of cinema

how could you forget

https://twitter.com/SafeBetMMA/status/1353032133334319104?s=20

crepeface
Nov 5, 2004

r*p*f*c*
does he still hit hard? we haven't seen him land that overhand right in years and that's the only punch he has besides an incredibly unconvincing jab feint

crepeface
Nov 5, 2004

r*p*f*c*
please don't give me hope

crepeface
Nov 5, 2004

r*p*f*c*

Bluedeanie posted:

You guys really do hate Woodley so much you'd root for a Paul, huh

jake paul supports better pay for fighters and is a hero of the people

https://twitter.com/jakepaul/status/1386387138653081600?s=20

(i actually have no idea who he is, some kind of shithead youtuber?)

crepeface
Nov 5, 2004

r*p*f*c*
i try to write funny ones for the fighters that I know for my casual friends. when i don't have time or can't be bothered, i steal yours. :)

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crepeface
Nov 5, 2004

r*p*f*c*
i was vaguely thinking i should submit something to the front page but i couldn't think of a topic.

Marching Powder posted:

i used to do this on my work's intranet and i always had tons of people emailing me saying that i should figure out a way to monetise it. i genuinely think there's a market (somewhere) for chill people who know what they're talking about and can at least attempt humour to give their thoughts on upcoming cards

this is like 90% of the reason for jack slack's success

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