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Hi, all! Happy Monday! Lisa in HR here. Just wanted to send out a gentle reminder to everyone to please check out the exciting new employee satisfaction quizzes in the Knowledge Hub. We've got so many great prizes that you can win just for knowing our company's core values and meeting your sales metrics every week! Just last week, Ian in Corporate Customer Retention won a SeaDoo Mini Desktop Replica for his cubicle--how cool is that??? He got 100% on all his quizzes by completing them by the required time on Wednesday afternoon. Way to go, Ian!!! I hope you all enjoy your week and don't forget, the quizzes are due every Wednesday by 2pm. Failure to complete the quizzes will result in a point on your file, and five points results in termination. Have a great day! |
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May 9, 2021 17:27
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| # ? May 6, 2024 17:29 |
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Good morning, West Family!!!! Lisa in HR again. I noticed a few of you haven't completed your quizzes in the Knowledge Hub and I just wanted to let you know that this week we will NOT be awarding prizes for these quizzes. It wouldn't be fair to everyone if Ian in Corporate Customer Retention was the only one who ever won prizes, now would it??? L O L !!! For this week, we'll call it a "Practice Week" and start over again with the prizes next week. Please note, the point penalty will still apply for this week if you failed to complete the core company values quizzes in the allotted time. If you have any questions, please feel free to reach out during business hours. Thanks, and have a FANTASTIC day! Best, Lisa |
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May 9, 2021 17:31
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hi call center family, supervisor Jeff here. it has come to our attention that some of you have been failing to place calls to numbers that are on the "do not call" registry. looks like I'm going to have to reiterate our corporate policy, as vetted by our attorneys. we take the law very seriously here. the "do not call" registry serves an important advisory function. in particular, we "advise" all call center staff to think seriously about how abiding by the registry will or will not enable you to complete your hourly, daily, and weekly call quotas. we "advise" you to consider the likelihood of legal enforcement in this area as it may compare or relate to having your pay docked and/or your toilet privileges revoked. we "advise" you to keep working and making calls at all times, using all phone numbers available to you, and to keep the law in mind as you do so. hopefully this clarifies our stance on what you need to do to keep your jobs, and how the law may relate to that. thank you.
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May 9, 2021 21:33
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jason, please stop. please for the love of all that is holy stop. you win, i admit defeat. you have ruined me. my marriage is in shambles, my dog will not come to my call, my children refuse to make eye contact with me. a miasma of despair covers me, as was your plan. please jason, i will do anything, just stop cooking fish in the break room microwave. how can you even consume the steaming flesh of what i assume must have been an eel that lived in a waste processing plant, or a shark grown fat on effluent. how are you still alive? i've seen countless women come pick you up after work. do you even own a car, jason? how are you a real human. i called your mother, jason, weeks ago when i still thought this world made sense. i'll call his mom, i said to myself, and she'll tell me about how jasons father was a soviet supersoldier, or an extra terrestrial, or that you fell into toxic waste as a babe. to no avail. in another life i could have been you. what went wrong with you jason. how did you become this? please stop, jason. please. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ thanks for your time have a super duper day, bailey smithereens, accounting dept. manager
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May 9, 2021 22:52
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Mormon Nailer posted:Hi, all! Happy Monday! Lisa in HR here. Just wanted to send out a gentle reminder to everyone to please check out the exciting new employee satisfaction quizzes in the Knowledge Hub. what a bad deal, the cubicle freaking owns the seadoo mini desktop replica? lol, so if the dude gets moved cubicles or ever gets an office or laid off, he loses the prize. imo ian should email himself a new job |
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May 9, 2021 23:35
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I actually work for a call center doing all the workforce garbage. I die a bit more each day PER MY LAST EMAIL that I CCed all the Ops managers on to talk about how Gail can't wrap her head around the WFO processes and constantly asks the same questions over and over again regarding entering offline segments and requesting time off. Can you follow up please? Thanks! |
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May 10, 2021 00:38
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Greetings Customer Service ATX, We in Human Resources would like to kindly remind all employees that the showers in the gym are 1 person occupancy max. Thank you from all of us, HR ATX Don't remember the exact wording, but that is the gist of a real email I got when I worked at a call center
more falafel please posted:just turn that impostor syndrome into "I'm Poster" syndrome |
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May 10, 2021 00:52
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Dearest Frank, I treasure our most intimate moments together, with your voice softly and sweetly imparting gentle nothings for only me to hear. I yearn for your touch, constantly craving the way you sweetly cradle me and gently brush your face against mine, your soft stubble ever-so-slightly teasing against my smooth skin. I exist only for you. Please never stop holding me. Stay with me forever. Eternally yours, Cubicle Telephone |
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May 10, 2021 16:59
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from: lisa@fabrikamflooring.com <Tinki.Stevens@BilboDildo.org> hello , im in the middle of a meeting and i need several thousand dollars in best buy gift ca r d$ for a price raffle for the staff. do not call me as im very busy, i need this done TODAY. please email me the codes when complete, lisa Fabrikam Floor Services president, ceo slumpy |
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May 10, 2021 18:45
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we get a "weekly note" from the ceo about growth this quarter and what the board of directors thinks about the latest acquisition and which conference he gave the keynote address at with a hashtag at the end of each paragraph, like after a paragraph about how successful security training has been it'll say #LeadingSecurity don't feel like doing a parody because these things are loooooooong |
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May 10, 2021 19:28
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| # ? May 6, 2024 17:29 |
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I would like to remind everyone while we have a lax drug policy, please do not engage in selling or distribution of illegal substances on company property. |
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May 10, 2021 19:41
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