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Since that bloody Americana.jpg thread is going burko with its voyeuristic expose of otherworldly American offal, it's best we show the world what is actually up with the land Down Under, rather than being an insular discussion for local AusGoons, this is where we get to exhibit our unique culture and confusing country from bizarre animals, delectable cuisine, dry sense of national humor and deeply ingrained casual racism where we love claiming other country's inventions and hate people who are good at things... I'll kick her off with stupid big things we have: THE BIG MERINO Goulburn, New South Wales.  Not to be confused with The Big Merino in Wagin, Western Australia, this hulking, demon-possessed, and much-lauded Bovidae is a monument to one of our longest-standing exports, WOOL. We were exporting so much bloody wool at some point that ports and docks of cities and major towns boasting enormous woolstores that housed more wool than could fit on one ship. The industry so large that dotted across the country were massive shearing sheds, some still remain that date back to the mid-1800s or earlier and are generally in the middle of loving nowhere, like this sandstone beast rotting away in Cordillo Downs in South Australia.  As for the woolstores, these massive warehouses spent generations soaking up all the lanolin from the wool itself and would occasionally burn to the ground in an unstoppable, oil-soaked-wood fuelled inferno that firemen dreaded.  Anyway, also there is The Big banana in Coffs Harbour, NSW.  This massive yellow tourist trap has been photographed by north-coast passers' by since 1964 and represents one of our other big exports that seems to go to poo poo every time North Queensland cops a decent cyclone. Just a casual 5-hour drive north and you'll find The Big Pineapple in Woombye, Queensland.  While not as popular as the banana, it boasts the intriguing bonus that you may actually enter the pineapple and be inside it, which is an outrageous drawcard for people who have dreamed of being inside a pineapple, though it is allegedly full of spiders. It recently came back to headline news locally as a drunk gronk decided to take a cheeky hoon in the little tourist train on the property and managed the derail the fucken' thing. What a legend.  https://www.4bc.com.au/big-pineapple-train-derailed-and-crashed-in-alleged-joyride/ There's also a Big Prawn in Ballina, New South Wales, which doubles as a focal point for stoned welfare recipients of the region.  And finally for now, Big Poo of Merimbula, NSW (Formerly of Kiama) which itself is a treat of a selfie op and a wonderful story...  quote:Unveiled in 2002, the Big Poo is made out of foam. This gives it two advantages, according to Cohen. One, it’s portable; it can very easily be moved if need be. And two, “it’s a floater,” he said. While it can float, it doesn’t. Instead, the Big Poo sits right next to the Welcome to Kiama sign next to the Princes Highway. “I am very unhappy to be here today to officially launch this five-meter-long memorial to the renewed stupidity and deceit of Sydney Water,” Cohen said at the time of its placement. “Sydney Water has distracted and misled South Coast community groups and Jamberoo farmers for two years with so-called ‘consultation’ on a new sewerage scheme for the local Jamberoo Valley, a consultation focused on reuse of effluent.... Now Sydney Water has shown its true colors - brown and yellow - and has finally revealed that it proposes to retreat to past standard operative procedure and dump the effluent on the ocean at Bombo.” Contributions to this thread and encouraged and welcome, as well as questions from confused members of anywhere else in the world. Cheers!
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May 24, 2021 05:58
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While I had no intention of adding to this thread so soon, a friend is touring the Northern Territory right now and just posted this absolute gem of a find. The Pink Panther Hotel in Larrimah, NT. The middle of nowhere in an incredibly sparsely populated land... The pub hosts another notable landmark, The Big Stubby which is its only claim to fame other than the mysterious disappearance of a man and his dog in 2017 which is still unsolved. I'll let the images speak for themselves as far as folk art and general WTF goes...       
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May 24, 2021 06:27
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hell yes. im going to have Many Important Questions for this thread
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May 24, 2021 06:30
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First question. Where are the fattest, dumbest rednecks located in Australia? And not "on the other end of the Pacific ocean" Second question: 
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May 24, 2021 06:38
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i am a huge man with a huge appetite for bananas but no banana has ever been able to sate me
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May 24, 2021 07:08
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Aardvark! posted:First question. Where are the fattest, dumbest rednecks located in Australia? And not "on the other end of the Pacific ocean" Queensland. quote:Second question: That there, mate, is a Pie Floater. Considered a type of 'street food' and the idea was imported from a cheap English dish. quote:The pie floater is an Australian dish particularly common in Adelaide. It consists of a meat pie in a thick pea soup, typically with the addition of tomato sauce. Believed to have been first created in the 1890s, the pie floater gained popularity as a meal sold by South Australian pie carts. In 2003, it was recognised as a South Australian Heritage Icon. It's worth noting that Port Pirie is renowned as one of Australia's crappiest towns, forever holding the #10 slot for the weekly poo poo Towns Of Australia shame list from a popular satirical page (https://www.facebook.com/shittownsofaustralia/) which lists poo poo towns based on notable news articles and also awards specific towns on other demerits.  For example, here is this week's list. 
Maximum Sexy Pigeon fucked around with this message at 07:43 on May 24, 2021 |
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May 24, 2021 07:36
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Nefarious 2.0 posted:i am a huge man with a huge appetite for bananas but no banana has ever been able to sate me You may have a cyclone named after you if you promise to make landfall near Innisfail or Tulley.
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May 24, 2021 07:39
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What is a gronk????? Is that like a Florida Man?
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May 24, 2021 07:46
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Aardvark! posted:What is a gronk????? Is that like a Florida Man? All Australians are Florida man. All. Gronk translates to something like deadshit.
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May 24, 2021 08:05
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Inceltown posted:All Australians are Florida man. All. Or drongo
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May 24, 2021 08:24
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May 24, 2021 08:55
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Maximum Sexy Pigeon posted:Queensland. NSW gets pretty drat racist. Found one homestead owner whose dad thought it was a good laugh to shorten the homesteads name on the sign to "nynga" station. Basically, all of it is the racist bit. And it doesn't stop at skin tone. Aussies rage at poms or anyone else with ideas that don't originate from the motherland. Also, the gently caress is the OP on about? 5 hours from banana to pineapple? Good luck getting from Coffs to brissie in 4 hours. The traffic loving blows.
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May 24, 2021 09:02
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More wool than can fit on one ship? Is that supposed to be a lot of wool? Anyway, for content... I was going to post a picture of a poop to express my disdain so I searched for Australian dog poo poo and this was typical....  Even your dogs are a pack of wimp shiters. I would be embarrassed if my mates fat ancient foxy cross did shits that wimpy, just to be within 50 miles of a dog that did that pathetic a crap. Heck I've seen bigger rat turds. Anyway good luck with your thread I will be watching with bated breath, eager to see your fresh perversions to feel better about myself and my neighbors.
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May 24, 2021 09:05
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I was going to bring up Witenoom later on, the town was taken off the map some time ago and removed from the grid because the whole area is contaminated with blue asbestos. This cute little video will clear up all you need to know, it's surprisingly charming but I don't want to spoil it, so just watch. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PaHw_bGI2ME
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May 24, 2021 09:21
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BrassRoots posted:NSW gets pretty drat racist. Found one homestead owner whose dad thought it was a good laugh to shorten the homesteads name on the sign to "nynga" station. Two words: One Nation. Also, google thinks you can get there in around that time, I've never tried it.
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May 24, 2021 09:22
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https://allthatsinteresting.com/olive-python-eating-crocodile 
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May 24, 2021 09:26
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This post/display pic combo got me rattled
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May 24, 2021 09:33
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Waiting for the potato cake/scallop wars to commence.
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May 24, 2021 09:49
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tie me kangaroo down sport, a ruddy dingo ate my baby!
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May 24, 2021 09:51
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Lolie posted:Waiting for the potato cake/scallop wars to commence. it's a potato cake. i'll die on this hill.
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May 24, 2021 10:04
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Lolie posted:Waiting for the potato cake/scallop wars to commence. Either or, they're awful.
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May 24, 2021 10:06
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May 24, 2021 10:10
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Maximum Sexy Pigeon posted:It's worth noting that Port Pirie is renowned as one of Australia's crappiest towns, forever holding the #10 slot for the weekly poo poo Towns Of Australia shame list from a popular satirical page (https://www.facebook.com/shittownsofaustralia/) which lists poo poo towns based on notable news articles and also awards specific towns on other demerits. Port Pirie's mayor actually had a sook about it and it made national news https://www.abc.net.au/news/2021-05-10/port-pirie-named-s-test-town-in-south-australia/100128394 
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May 24, 2021 10:15
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Lolie posted:Waiting for the potato cake/scallop wars to commence. Pfft. What about the Pot/middy/schooner etc. divide. I can still remember the dirty looks I git on my first trip to Sydney. All I wanted was a bloody beer, and the stupid bartender didn't even know what size glass to put it in. I suppose that's what a lifetime of following Rugby League will do to a person.
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May 24, 2021 10:16
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BrigadierSensible posted:Pfft. Easy. Pot/middy is the same thing on the east coast as a schooner is in Adelaide because they don't know what the gently caress beer sizes are. Seriously, WTF Adelaide? 
Maximum Sexy Pigeon fucked around with this message at 10:25 on May 24, 2021 |
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May 24, 2021 10:23
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May 24, 2021 10:34
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May 24, 2021 10:45
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May 24, 2021 10:49
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sailor goon
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May 24, 2021 10:58
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Tace Vim posted:sailor goon 
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May 24, 2021 11:34
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If you grew up in Melbourne during the 90s, then there was a rumour going around that one of your teachers was a member of this band. But you'd be wrong. Coz the bass player was my year 9 Maths teacher.
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May 24, 2021 11:36
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BrigadierSensible posted:If you grew up in Melbourne during the 90s, then there was a rumour going around that one of your teachers was a member of this band. Mr. Holt?
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May 24, 2021 12:13
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Aardvark! posted:What is a gronk????? Is that like a Florida Man? A dude that had spent some time in various jails in Sydney, when I asked why he just called a person in the room a Gronk he said "because he's a dirty fucker who never has a fuckin shower". I think it's a jail thing here.
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May 24, 2021 14:05
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I watched this documentary about Australia recently, thought it might help answer some questions https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v6yg4ImnYwA
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May 24, 2021 14:13
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 e: I just realised that is an English magpie, here is a possum smoking a joint instead 
Visible Stink fucked around with this message at 14:54 on May 24, 2021 |
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May 24, 2021 14:47
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lol a lot
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May 24, 2021 15:31
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Weka posted:More wool than can fit on one ship? Is that supposed to be a lot of wool? i tried reading that flag out loud, turns out i wasn't muted in my work call so my coworker heard me say "You dog oval office" in a horrible australian accent thankfully nobody important
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May 24, 2021 15:33
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I could not see the sheep at first I just got some gunty grub monster with two tiny arms praising
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May 24, 2021 15:44
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May 24, 2021 15:54
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a friend of mine went backpacking in australia and spent 8 weeks in wollongong for some reason, probably because he thought the name sounded funny he doesn't talk about what happened there other than that he called some american guy a ginger oval office for stealing his kebab or something and was later attacked by said ginger oval office, which ended up with both of them going to hospital. wollongong sounds like a city of dreams
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May 24, 2021 16:24
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